The season of love begins with a 1st quarter moon in Taurus inviting us to indulge in our creature comforts. On the 3rd, Mercury transitions into Pisces whisking us off into La La Land. Matters of romance get hot and spicy when Venus moves into Aries on the 7th. Watch out for a clash of egos leading up to the dramatic Full Moon in Leo on the 9th. Mars moving into Capricorn on the 16th reminds you to let your work speak for itself. On the same day, Mercury begins its first retrograde of 2020 which takes place in ethereal Pisces. Once the Sun moves into this mutable zodiac sign on the 18th, it'll be difficult to stay focused on the practical matters. However, the New Moon on the 23rd invites us to find the magic in the mundane.
Check out your cosmic blueprint for the month ahead below:
Aries
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
This time of the year begins to slow down for you as much of the inner planets move into Pisces. Your dream world is getting pretty weird when Mercury moves into this part of your sky on the 3rd. However, communication with the spirit world is all the more easy for you during this transit. On the 7th, Venus moves into your sign making you THE hot commodity.
Fortune and favor follows the bold and we all know you have no qualms about shooting your shot.
Around the Full Moon on the 9th, you may finally let your crush know you're interested or debut that creative project you've been working on behind the scenes. Your ruling planet, Mars, moves into Capricorn on the 16th, helping you get ahead in career matters. Just make sure you're not bulldozing your boss over on your way to the top of the ladder. On the same day, Mercury goes retrograde, helping you get clear about whether you're truly ready to part ways with something (or someone) for good. February comes to a close with the Sun and Moon snuggled up in Pisces on the 23rd, inviting you to choose the path of the peaceful warrior. Sometimes surrendering is our wisest course of action. *Cues the "Serenity Prayer"*
Taurus
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
The month begins with a cozy quarter moon in your sign on the 1st, making it a good day to do your favorite thing—absolutely nothing (unless you're making time to stuff your face with pizza and wings). On the 3rd, Mercury moves into Pisces, helping you heal any rifts among your social circle. Bring on the good vibes! Your ruling planet, Venus, moves into wild ass Aries on the 7th. You could be attracting a fiery individual into your life or embodying the flame yourself. The Full Moon on the 9th is bringing the family drama to a head, giving you the clear to leave the nest or take some space to yourself. By the 3rd quarter moon on the 15th, the heat cools down, helping you make amends where necessary.
On the 16th, Mars moves into Capricorn getting you motivated toward your educational goals. What do you need to learn to develop yourself for your long-term goals? Now is the time to create your plan of action. The first Mercury Retrograde of the year begins on the same day, bringing back some old friends, and issues with them, from the past. It's up to you to decide if it's worth reconciling or leaving behind. This is also a good time to breathe some new life into an old vision of yours that is fading away. The month winds down with both the Sun and Moon in Pisces, restoring your hope in your connection to others and the purpose you're meant to serve in this life.
Gemini
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
February kicks off with Mercury moving into Pisces on the 3rd, helping you make magic in your chosen career path. On the 7th, the planet of love and money moves into passionate Aries which could have you attracting someone within your social circle. If you've been thinking about promoting someone from the friend zone, now would be a good time to do so. The Full Moon on the 9th helps you clear the air in a dramatic, I mean…a grand, way that really catches someone's attention. Make the best use of social media to take your brand to the next level around this time.
Energetic Mars moves into disciplined Capricorn on the 16th which has you hyper-focused on getting in good standing with financial institutions. It's time to get the credit card spending in check, ma'am. During this transit, you could also be faced with some pent-up aggression, needing a healthy outlet for release. Spending time in nature is beneficial but if it's too cold outside, surround yourself with plenty of plants and crystals. On the same day, Mercury goes retro, giving you a chance to revisit an important conversation about your career progression. The month comes to a sweet close with both the Sun and the Moon coupled up on the 23rd extending a new opportunity to you that feels like a major achievement.
Cancer
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
Wanderlust is likely getting the best of you around the 3rd when Mercury moves into mutable Pisces. It's time to plan for that Spring Break trip—preferably before Mercury goes retro on the 18th. No worries if you can't book that flight to Cabo before then! Check out these tips for navigating Mercury Retrograde. On the 7th, Venus moves into Aries and you could find yourself attracting someone in a position of authority. The Full Moon on the 9th coaxes you out of your shell to shine that beautiful light of yours.
As you reveal your most authentic self, you'll align with the eternal source of wealth.
On the 16th, Mars moves into hardworking Capricorn and you're getting serious about your #relationshipgoals. During this transit, the insufferable "let's just go with the flow" types will likely get blocked. Mercury begins its first retrograde of the year on the same day, giving you a chance to triple-check your travel plans, study for exams, or to just spend some time reconnecting with your Higher Self. On the 18th, the Sun enters Pisces, marking the last month of the astrological year. February comes to a close with a New Moon on the 23rd inviting you to take a journey inward to find the treasures that lie within the wisdom of your experiences. Just make sure you come back out to share those gems with the rest of us!
Leo
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
The month begins with a 1st quarter moon in Taurus. Use this energy to make that last final push towards that thing you need to check off your to-do list. On the 3rd, Mercury moves into Pisces which will have convos running deep as you prioritize your more intimate connections during this time. You'll need a soft space to land during this time, so make sure your support system is ready and available. The planet of love moves into fiesty Aries on the 7th and you could meet someone special at school, a seminar, or during your travels. When it comes to money-making ventures, think of ways that you can capitalize on selling information that you're an expert on. Your Full Moon takes place on the 9th and all eyes are on you! This is a good time to celebrate your growth of the seeds you planted six months ago at your New Moon.
Around the 15th, the energy gets chill with the 3rd quarter moon in Scorpio, inviting you to relax and reflect on the journey. On the 16th, Mars moves into Capricorn, getting your life all the way together. Discipline and routine are your best friends during this transit! This is also a supportive time to work towards those fitness goals. On the same day, Mercury begins its first retrograde of the year, making this a good time to call up your credit lender to work out a payment plan. During this transit, you may also be revisited by some old painful, emotional experiences. Trust that the feels will pass and you're a lot further along in your growth than your memories make it seem. On the 18th, the Sun enters Pisces and the New Moon follows shortly behind on the 23rd, reminding you of just how powerful you are for the wisdom you gained from some of your most challenging experiences.
Virgo
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
Relationships take front and center at the beginning of the month when Mercury moves into Pisces, helping you smooth out any friction within your closest one-on-one connections. Once Venus moves into Aries on the 7th, you could feel like you're playing tug-of-war when it comes to matters of romance. Remember, it's not about being right. It's about being willing to learn and grow with someone (which does involve being wrong sometimes). On the 9th, the Full Moon illuminates a part of your subconscious that's been stifling the vibrancy of your expression.
What wounds do you need to resolve around your inner child to feel more safe in expressing this aspect of yourself?
On the 16th, driven Mars moves into Capricorn, helping you get more serious about your creative interests. It's time to turn those hobbies into new streams of income. When it comes to romance, you're desiring something more solid during this transit. Mercury begins its first retrograde of the year on the same day, making this a great time to revisit any business contracts and agreements that need some fine-tuning. On the 18th, the Sun enters Pisces heralding in the last season of the astrological year. The month winds down with a New Moon on the 23rd inviting you into a new professional or romantic partnership that is bound to bring more magic into your world.
Libra
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
The month begins with you focused on improving your health and well-being. Although structure is usually the way to go about this, Piscean energy makes it a little more difficult to stay focused so opting for more free-flowing activities like dancing or taking a walk can be just what you need to clear your mind and get your blood flow circulating. On the 7th, Venus moves into Aries, heating up your love life and helping you attract more of the Type A personalities (if that's your thing). When it comes to money moves, don't be afraid to take the lead! The Full Moon on the 9th invites you to celebrate life with your friends. This is also great energy for a big social media reveal of that project or new merchandise you're dropping.
On the 16th, Mars moves into goal-oriented Capricorn and during this transit you'll be running a tight ship on the home front. This is a good time to work on any long overdue organizational projects. If you've been thinking about long-term investments, it's time to get out there and start hunting for properties. Also, be mindful of pent-up aggression toward your family members, particularly a masculine figure, during this time. On the same day, Mercury goes retrograde, making it a good time to check in with your doctor for your annual exam with your gynecologist. On the 18th, Pisces season officially begins and the month comes to a close with a magical New Moon on the 23rd inviting you to prioritize more emotional healing and balance in your life.
Scorpio
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
February begins with a first quarter moon in Taurus on the 1st, creating a little tension between your growing need for space and the demands of others. Opt for a quiet night in and tell everyone else they can wait. On the 3rd, Mercury moves into Pisces, granting you the Midas touch when it comes to your creative projects. You've also got the gift of gab when it comes to wooing anyone that you're romantically interested in. On the 7th, Venus moves into Aries and a sexy workplace romance could be developing. If you want to avoid that drama, opt for the gym or some kind of fitness environment if you're open to meeting someone.
On the 9th, the Full Moon calls for a celebration of a long-awaited career achievement. Mars, the warrior, moves into bossy Capricorn on the 16th and you may be anxious to make a move. A short, weekend getaway would be perfect during this transit. Just make sure to run through your Mercury Retrograde checklist before you hit the road! On the same day, Mercury dips backwards through Pisces to help you make some edits to that creative project you've been toiling away at. On the 18th, the Sun officially enters Pisces and a New Moon follows shortly behind on the 23rd inviting you to embrace more pleasure, adventure, and magic.
Sagittarius
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
Home and family matters are your top priorities at the beginning of the month once Mercury moves into Pisces on the 3rd. Conversations about renovating, renting, or buying property are likely. If you're in an established connection, you and your partner could be talking about adding a new addition to your household. On the 7th, Venus moves into Aries and dating gets fun for you again. You'll be attracting the more adventurous, take-charge types but just be mindful of a clash of the egos especially as we build up to the Full Moon in Leo on the 9th. We all know how much you love a friendly debate but certain conversations just shouldn't be had on the first date, okay, Saggie? Instead of being overly opinionated with your romantic interest, how about blogging about it instead?
On the 16th, Mars moves into disciplined Capricorn, helping you take a slow and steady approach to building wealth for yourself. Now that the holiday season is behind us, it's time to get serious about your financial goals for the year ahead. On the same day, Mercury goes retrograde giving you a chance to revisit a conversation about that house you're interested in closing on or that contractor you want to hire to renovate your kitchen. Pay attention to the details if you're signing any contract during this time. Pisces season officially begins on the 18th when the Sun enters the mutable zodiac sign represented by the fish and the month comes to a close with a sweet New Moon inviting you to plant your roots in something new.
Capricorn
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
The 1st quarter moon in your sister sign, Taurus, has you feeling pretty productive right out of the gate in February, especially when it comes to materializing all of those genius creative ideas of yours. On the 3rd, Mercury moves into Pisces which will bring an element of sensitivity to your thoughts and communication over the next month. This is a good time to smooth out tension with siblings and to also show your softer side to the world, especially if you're an artist! On the 7th, home and family takes center stage once Venus moves into Aries. Be mindful of short tempers and unnecessary battles with roommates or the landlord.
The Full Moon on the 9th hits you in a vulnerable spot but you'll bravely accept the wake-up call headed your way. On a more practical level, you could be paying off some debt that's been hanging around for a while now. On the 16th, Mars moves into your sign, getting you energized and ready to take charge of your goals. You can be the most productive during this transit so make the most of it. Bear in mind that Mercury does go retro on the same day but for you it's no biggie—get your car maintenanced, back up your hard drive, and maybe take a short social media hiatus if you need it. On the 18th, the Sun moves into Pisces for the next month and it will be meeting the New Moon in the sky on the 23rd, inviting you to set the intentions for a new way of expressing your deepest, most sentimental emotions.
Aquarius
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
Family tension could be stirring around the 1st quarter moon in Taurus at the beginning of the month. Choose your battles wisely. On the 3rd, Mercury moves into Pisces bringing the convo to money (magick). You're super in tune with the cosmic flow of abundance, so light up your prosperity candle or send up a prayer to your ancestors for some financial assistance. Love matters get hot and spicy when Venus moves into Aries where she's not so comfortable being. And for you, this placement can result in a bunch of unnecessary arguments with bae. However, if you're single, there should be a few VERY competitive suitors trying to get your attention on dating apps and social media. The Full Moon on the 9th calls for a celebration with a significant person in your life.
On the 16th, Mars moves into Capricorn helping you work through some unresolved feelings about your personal power. You're a lot more in control than you have previously thought. What will it take for you to embrace a sense of authority and ownership over the trajectory of your life? On the same day, Mercury goes retro for the first time this year, giving you a chance to revisit your budget, or any of those prosperity manifestations, to see what the progress is looking like. This is also a sensitive time in which you may be reminded of some experiences in which your self-esteem wasn't at its best. Remember, self-love is the best love. On the 18th, the Sun enters Pisces and cozies up with the New Moon on the 23rd, inviting you to embark on a new path to establish wealth that is in alignment with purpose.
Pisces
Laci Jordan/xoNecole
The month begins with Mercury moving into your sign, making your world all the more mystical and magical than it already is. While everyone else around you will feel like they're in the twilight zone, you'll be the anchor that shows us how to navigate the non-material plane. On the 7th, Venus moves into Aries and you'll attract more wealth by highlighting the qualities that make you a unique individual. It's OK to toot your horn from time to time, babe. The Full Moon on the 9th could reveal a hidden enemy that's jealous of all of the attention you're getting. But like they say, "If you don't have haters, you must not be doing something right."
This energy can also help you recognize how you're being own worst enemy by sabotaging the success (and maybe even the fame) you're meant to experience.
On the 16th, Mars moves into Capricorn, helping you get serious about those big hopes and dreams of yours. It's time to get backed up with right support from an army that has a similar mission as you. What legacy can you and your tribe create together? On the same day, Mercury goes retrograde and you'll likely be revisited by people from the past the most. Forgiveness is always your best bet but allowing someone access to you in the same way is up to your discretion. Your birthday season officially begins on the 18th with the month ending on a sweet note with a beautiful New Moon on the 23rd inviting you to make a wish about the magic you want to experience in your life in the year to come.
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Feature Photo by Laci Jordan/xoNecole
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A Cosmic Guide To Love In 2025: What The Stars Have In Store For Your Heart
The most important lesson we are learning about love in 2025 is change. Many major Astrological transits are happening this year, and these will last for years to come. As we walk through this new year, we are being asked to let go of the things we can’t control, and give more grace to the things we can. This is a year of a new perspective on love, finding gratitude in the little things, and watching as the universe supports us and the dreams we build for ourselves here.
At the beginning of the year, we are being shown how significant 2025 will be for love. From March 1, 2025, until April 12, 2025, Venus, the planet of love and relationships, will be retrograde. Venus goes retrograde approximately every 18 months and hasn’t been retrograde since the Summer of 2023. With love taking a step back at the beginning of the year, we move through a time of understanding the emotional world better and letting go of trying to control outcomes here.
What Does 2025 Have in Store for Love?
It’s time to refocus your relationship priorities overall, and with this retrograde happening in both Aries and Pisces, Aries being the first sign of the zodiac and Pisces being the last; there is a chapter we are closing and a new one we are walking into.
Another significant factor that is influencing relationships this year, is Jupiter’s entry into Cancer. Jupiter brings blessings, abundance, luck, and expansion, and in water sign Cancer, brings these gifts to your emotions. Cancer rules emotional safety, foundations, close loved ones, family, support, and emotional well-being, and with Jupiter in this sign from June 9, 2025, until June 30, 2026, we experience blessings in stability within love. This is a good year for building stronger foundations in love, aligning with those who are loyal and supportive, knowing what you need emotionally, and being a lot clearer on it.
Letting Go of the Past: The Astrological Theme of 2025
Overall, the guideline for the year when it comes to love is to focus on the bigger picture and let things work themselves out without forcing them to. Magic will come in for you this year when you can assess your needs and wants, let go of illusions or smoke and mirrors, and focus on the things you want for yourself rather than what you don’t. Your focus and beliefs on love are the priority right now, and things will be coming full circle for the better.
Read below to see your personal 2025 love forecast. Read for your sun, moon, and rising signs.
What Does Your Zodiac Sign Say About Your 2025 Love Life?
ARIES
2025 is one of the more significant years for you, Aries. A lot of the major transits are happening in your sign, which includes Venus retrograde in Aries at the beginning of the year, Neptune in Aries from March 2025 until 2039, and Saturn in Aries from May 2025 until 2028. Not to mention, Chiron, the wounded healer is currently in your sign until 2027.
What this means for you when it comes to love, is that you have learned a lot about where you want to be here, and it’s the year to implement more of these tools and knowledge of the heart.
This year for love is about honoring your integrity and what you need personally to thrive in life and creating that space to let it in. You need someone who will be there for you through whatever you are experiencing in life and not someone who adds to these challenges. This year is a time of rising above, and choosing better for yourself.
TAURUS
2025 for you when it comes to love, is all about perspective and taking better care of your heart, Taurus. Uranus, the planet of change, rebellion, progress, and upheaval, has been in your sign since 2019, and this year you get a break from all of the surprises. From Jul. 7, 2025, until Nov. 7, 2025, Uranus leaves your sign and enters Gemini, giving your mind and your heart some time to breathe.
This year you are being given the opportunity to see things for what they are, rather than what you fear them to be. You are able to see your relationship dynamics clearer, allowing you to feel more confident in what you are building and creating for yourself in this area of your life. What you are working on this year is letting go of overthinking, and allowing things to play out the way they are meant to in love.
GEMINI
This year you are feeling in balance when it comes to love, Gemini. Relationships are important to you in life overall, as you are a relationship-oriented sign, but it can be difficult at times to keep the balance and perspective here. This year, with lucky Jupiter in your sign until June, you have the opportunity to be blessed with some fortunate circumstances personally and within romance.
You are feeling yourself this year, and this is attracting you success and new opportunities within love.
Uranus will also be in your sign this year from Jul. 7 until Nov. 7, and some surprises are in store for you. Pay attention to what happens in your love life during this period, as similar themes will be coming back around for you when Uranus officially enters its Gemini transit from 2026 - 2032. Overall, this year is about balancing what’s coming and going in love, and finding your peace within your inner confidence for it all.
CANCER
2025 for you, Cancer, is about stability in love. You are growing emotionally from the ground up, and are feeling a sense of support, confidence, romance, and receptivity in your love life this year. You are one of the lucky signs of 2025, and this is due to Jupiter, the planet of blessings, entering your sign from June 9, 2025, until June 30, 2026. While Jupiter is in your sign, your life expands and you are able to see the gifts of your world that may have been harder to come by previously.
This is a year of spending more time with your loved ones and feeling more heard and supported emotionally. Safety and security are especially important to you this year, and you are only entertaining the people who feel that way about you and provide that. Many Cancers will be expanding their families this year or developing a long-term relationship, and overall this is a year of feeling stronger when it comes to love.
LEO
When it comes to love this year for you, Leo, it’s about trusting your intuition and listening more to what your heart is telling you. There are not many major transits happening in Leo in 2025, which means there is a lot of room to grow, but you may be feeling a lack of support or encouragement to do so. A lot of Leos are taking a step back to look at where they are currently in love, and yearning for some change and a new direction here.
Neptune will be in your 9th house of adventure for most of this year, and you are being asked to get inspired and do things differently, but don’t take unnecessary risks in love that may not serve you in the long run.
It can be easy to get lost in the fantasy of love rather than the actual reality you’ll live in here, and taking more time to understand yourself, your relationships, and the dynamics in your love life will be necessary. Overall, your heart is healing this year and you are moving away from the past and creating your new future.
VIRGO
This year when it comes to love, you are going through changes that are aligning you closer to your goals and dreams here, Virgo. You are focused on making things work that you want to see bloom, and also letting go of putting effort into people that aren’t reciprocating the same energy. With the North Node entering your sister sign Pisces and the South Node moving into your sign from Jan. 11, 2025, until Jul. 26, 2026, you are doing a lot of letting go over the next year.
However, with the North Node being in your 7th house of love, new doors and gifts are also opening up for you and your partnerships. The more you can let go of perfection and overworking your mind and your heart, the more blessings you will experience when it comes to love this year. In 2025, you also have two Eclipses in your sign, and there are overall a lot of changes Virgos are moving through this year. Your main guidance for love is to stand by the things that serve your heart and release yourself from what burdens it.
LIBRA
Love is coming to fruition for you this year, Libra. You have been through a lot in your personal life these past few years, and walking into 2025, you are ready for some positive change. This is a year of feeling in balance with your personal goals and dreams, and what you are experiencing romantically and financially as well. Relationship dynamics are serving you and your sense of abundance, and many gifts are coming your way in love this year.
With Neptune, Chiron, and Saturn all being in your 7th house of love, your love life and partnerships are the main focus for you in 2025.
You are moving through changes, overcoming previous obstacles, and bringing back the dreamy energy here. With Chiron in the 7th, you are still doing some healing of the heart, but with Neptune now entering, it all feels a little more romantic and spiritual at the same time. This year is about believing in the impossible in love, taking care of yourself, and allowing someone else to take care of you as well.
SCORPIO
This year is all about opportunity when it comes to love, Scorpio. You have your eyes on the prize and are focused on what you want for yourself, but also how you want to show up for love as well. You have goals and intentions that you are setting for your love life this year, and a lot of them reflect the passion and strength you are feeling as you enter the year. Vesta is in your sign this year until September, and you have a spark within you that is a magnet for success and love. You are walking forward confidently and are feeling inspired, sexy, and magical this year.
This is a very sensual and powerful year for you, and this energy is being reflected in the relationship experiences you are having. Jupiter also enters your 9th house of adventure halfway through the year, and there is something special about the trips you are taking and the risks you are taking in love. Overall, this is a year of doing things your way and attracting love to you through your inner confidence and charisma.
SAGITTARIUS
This is a beautiful year of feeling balanced and abundant in love, Sagittarius. There is a lot of energy coming in and you are giving a lot of love as well. This sense of synergy you are feeling within your love life this year has a lot to do with Juno, the asteroid of soulmates, in your sign from Feb. 19 - Apr. 15. Your people are coming in and you have options this year, Sag.
This is a year of feeling loved for the inspiring, outgoing, and unique being you are, and meeting more people who match your energy.
Saturn also enters your 5th house of romance this year, and you are learning a lot through your experiences with others. You are learning how to be more confident in who you are and what you want for yourself and also recognizing the importance of making more time for fun and playful experiences. This is the year to see love as a more light-hearted experience and to not take yourself too seriously.
CAPRICORN
You are letting things come to you when it comes to love this year, Capricorn. You are feeling beautiful, capable, and worthy, and you are receiving the gifts that come from this sense of confidence and patience. This past year, you were setting a lot of new goals for yourself and your relationships, and in 2025, you are experiencing the results of these efforts.
Jupiter moves into your sister sign Cancer from June 9, 2025, until June 30, 2026, and enters your 7th house of love, partnerships, romance, marriage, and harmony. Your love life and experience of it all are expanding this year, and benevolent Jupiter is sending blessings to this area of your life. This is a year of things coming full circle for you in love, and you feel less confused about it all and more sure of yourself and what is becoming for you here.
AQUARIUS
Love is a highlight for you this year, Aquarius. You are coming together with another, and many Aquarius’ will be forming new relationships or growing within a strong relationship. You are experiencing the fruition of your dreams in love, and are also able to heal and let go of past emotional experiences that have been overwhelming for you in the past.
The North Node enters your 12th house of closure this year, and you are motivated towards change, cleaning house, and releasing the cobwebs of the past.
You are walking into new emotional experiences with less baggage and self-doubt, and are experiencing a fresh start in love. This is a year of asking for what you need emotionally and receiving it. Love is coming in for you in harmonious and magical ways, and you are rewriting your story in love in 2025.
PISCES
You are moving through a lot of changes when it comes to love in 2025, Pisces. This is a year of closure, healing, and giving yourself a fresh start, and the way you enter the year will be a lot different than the way you end it. The North Node of Destiny enters your sign this year, and the South Node of Karma enters your 7th house of love. So, a lot of your focus this year is on your personal goals and path, and there may be some neglect or lack of focus on your relationships.
This can create some discord with those close to you, and your guidance for this year is to try to balance the personal successes and wins you are experiencing, with the love changes that also need your attention right now. Know that what leaves your life this year is being replaced by something better, and also know that your healing doesn’t need to have a timeline and you can take as much time as you need to grow. Overall, you are turning a new page in love in 2025.
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New year, new dating style. Courtesy of a former sugar baby.
Being a sugar baby had its (obvious) perks, but the most significant ones didn’t center around the material benefits. To date, I have a bigger appreciation for the lessons I’ve learned and applied them to my dating life.
Dating men of higher social status shortened my tolerance for a lot of things I was convinced were normal. I blamed the universe for attracting undesirable men when it was my fault for allowing undesirable behavior. An interesting dichotomy between those guys and sugar daddies was the treatment I accepted.
It was easier to put my foot down with men of opulence because their privilege meant there was no limit to meeting my desires. Plus, recognizing my own worth made them (the good ones) want to treat me with the same high regard.
I’ll admit you don’t NEED to be an SB to enhance your dating style, but that’s the path I journeyed. It taught me how to be gracefully tough on men based on the simple fact that I’m invaluable. I’ll never convince anyone to be an SB, but feel free to pick a few gems I learned that might take your 2025 dating style to the next level.
Don’t overdo it by showing gratitude.
Let’s stop praising men for the bare minimum.
Yes, it’s okay to make a man feel affirmed but don’t let those affirmations come off too intensely, especially for things that require minimal effort. Don’t tell him about your ex never opening the passenger door for you, don’t brag about him being "The One" because he texted to make sure you got home safely, and most definitely don’t offer up the cat just because he paid a $150 dinner bill (give it because you want to, not out of obligation).
To be honest, I barely even say thank you when a man finds me attractive. “You are so beautiful.” I would respond, “Aww, you’re so sweet.” When he holds the door open, I graze his arm and smile.
Showing too much excitement about the bare minimum strokes his ego and draws a ceiling, which he doesn’t feel he needs to surpass. It tells him you’re not used to regular treatment, so you’ll be grateful for anything. Why do more than necessary? I like my men reflecting at the end of our date, thinking, “What can I do to impress her?”
Don’t stop having manners, though. Just keep it simple and move on.
There’s no such thing as “dating for potential.”
Hold my hand with this one.
There comes a time when the word “potential” shouldn’t be a part of your dating vocabulary. It’s nothing more than the encouragement of false hope. He’s not flaky with time because his schedule is too busy between balancing family and work. It’s because you’re not important enough to prioritize making time for.
He’s not stingy on dates because he’s having a rough time handling all his financial responsibilities. It’s because he’d rather spend his money on things that don’t involve you.
Trust me when I say men don’t date with potential in mind. Many of them hold themselves in very high regard with an “I can do better” mindset, and so should you. There’s A LOT of weight in the saying, “If he wanted to he would.” So stay away from Mr. Shoulda Coulda Woulda because, at the end of the day, he didn’t.
*P.S. If he ever says he doesn’t deserve you, he’s not being sheepishly humble. Take his word for it and run.
Do NOT be afraid to say no.
How many times have you put yourself through something you didn’t want to do based on feeling obligated? You compromised yourself in order to please the person you’re dating because it seemed like the easier option. Let me just remind you of the old saying, “Nothing good in life comes easy.”
I like comparing men to children, not to demean them but to draw similarities. Children often like to push and see how much they can get away with until the parent says no. Once you allow them to get away with one thing, they’ll nudge the limits to see how often they can skate by.
Dating is just like this. Get comfortable giving rejection. It can be an uncomfortable concept for some, so consider saying no and following it with a light reason. For example, “Do you want to come over and watch Netflix?” “No, I don’t feel comfortable going to strangers’ houses.” If his response is anything but understanding with a Plan B, on to the next.
Those boundaries were created to protect you. Any man who respects you will respect them too.
Don’t lay all your cards on the table.
When a man asks, “So what exactly are you looking for?” The vaguest response comes to mind.
It’s a common mistake to think men (not all) ask questions for unselfish reasons. That one, especially, is basically like asking for cheat codes to a game. Describing your idea of a perfect man, dating intentions, etc. allows him to know who he needs to morph himself into in order to get what he wants. Enter love bombing, physical intimacy, delusions of potential, then ghosting.
I’ve said the below on a few first dates and wasn’t surprised by how quickly the guys weeded themselves out.
"I’ve been having fun figuring things out as time goes on. There are times when I love going out to meet new people and times when I love cuddling up on the couch. It depends on how I’m feeling.”
I just said a whole lotta nothing, leaving it up to him to decipher. It’s open-ended, which forces him to show his intentions and let things play out naturally with as little manipulation as possible.
The first date defines how he views you.
This is where all those conversations leading up to this day come into play.
The perfect first date doesn’t only have to consist of 5-star dining and lavish wine collections. Those are merely perks. The perfect first date is valued based on how much effort he put in to show he’s been listening.
You’ve been dropping subtle hints that tulips are your favorite flowers. Did he show up empty-handed? You shared your discomfort with driving to far places at night. Did he book a 9 p.m. reservation somewhere 30 minutes away? You told him about your new venture into veganism. Did he take you to his favorite steakhouse?
These aren’t small things and they’re DEFINITELY not things for you to take on as a challenge. These could be easy signs of a life full of selfishness and laziness if shrugged off by the belief you should be satisfied with him making time for you.
Will taking my advice find you a husband faster? Who knows? But, ultimately, dating isn’t supposed to be an earnest search for a man. It should be a time of personal growth while sorting through experiences to find a partner who will appreciate the valuable woman you are.
Having high standards for yourself doesn’t make you difficult or unreasonable. To the right man, it definitely won’t make you undateable. Like I said before, nothing good in life comes easy.
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