Anyone who knows me knows I can fall asleep anywhere. But there was a time I could sleep anywhere except my own apartment.
I struggled so badly with anxiety and fear that someone would break into my apartment, that I literally went months without getting a good night's sleep. I think all women who have lived alone at some point in their lives can relate to this one.
Thankfully, I had great friends who let me stay overnight at their place, where I would sleep like a baby. Still, I couldn't do that forever, and as much as I loved getting some sleep, I just wanted to be able to do it in my own bed. After a while, I found a few habits that took time to set in, but ultimately helped me get rest.
Don't Nap During The Day
Taking a nap during the day was my go-to.
It was so easy because at the time, I worked from 6am to 2pm, so when I got home, there was enough going on around the outside of my apartment that I could sleep with ease. But this only made it even more difficult to sleep at night because I wasn't really tired. And of course by the time I actually did fall asleep, it was pretty much time for me to wake up.
Even in the morning, it was difficult for me to get out of my bed because I thought a stranger was hiding in my apartment and waiting for me get up. Yeah, it was that bad at one point. But the positive thing is that as tired as I was during the day from not getting any sleep the night before, if I could hold out until later in the evening, I could at least get a full night of uninterrupted rest.
Get That Temp Right
The temperature in your home actually has a lot do with how well you sleep.
We all know it's pretty much impossible to sleep when you're really cold or really hot. Some of those sleepless nights for me came because my feet were freezing and I didn't want to get up and put on a pair of socks.
While the best temperature for sleeping is 60 to 67 degrees Fahrenheit, you might want to grab an extra blanket or put a fan near your bed if that's too hot or too cold. Either way, there's nothing like feeling completely comfortable when you get in the bed. That will help you not only get to sleep, but stay asleep until your alarm goes off.
Read, Honey
… An actual book. You might be surprised at how tired you get once you start flipping through the pages.
This one helped me a lot because even though podcasts and audiobooks are also helpful solutions for a lot of people, I have a hard time sleeping with noise like talking or music because it just makes me want to get in the mix (however, those sleep sounds app come through in the clutch). But when I started reading, it didn't take long for the book to fall on my face as I drifted away to sleep. This is also a great one because it doesn't cause more of a distraction or get your body excited like television or scrolling through social media.
Get Social
I wouldn't suggest doing this every night of the week, but if you can find something to do until a couple of hours before it's time for you to wind down, you could sleep easier compared to spending a ton of time a home.
I say this because by the time you get home, you could be dog tired and can't help but get some sleep. It's like the method when parents ride their kids around in the car until they fall asleep. Whether it's taking a workout class (that will really get you good and tired) or making weekly plans with a friend, staying out until it's time to wind down could be the key to help you get better sleep. Sidebar: Taking a shower before going to bed can do wonders for both your body and your sleep schedule.
Phone A Friend
There were times I would call my then boyfriend in the middle of the night because I was scared and couldn't sleep.
At first, I got a little annoyed because he would make me feel kind of stupid for literally being afraid every single night. But at the same time, he would help me realize how silly it was to think someone was in my home without me knowing about it. While my inner thoughts would always find a way to argue with what he was saying, I knew he was right. I would have to overcome this fight within my mind before I could get over my fear and get some sleep.
Pray Girl, Pray
And keep doing it! I remember I would say a prayer almost every night like, "God, please help me get some sleep tonight." And I wouldn't.
I think I was focusing too much on trying to get sleep, that my body wouldn't let me do it. Even though I started praying for things like peace and protection, I also started to pray about other things that were going on, like why I was really afraid and going through anxiety to begin with. Those sleepless nights ended up being some amazing times with God. And eventually, I would fall asleep.
Featured image by Getty Images
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It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Alistair Berg/Getty ImagesStep 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Getty ImagesStep 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
DMP/ Getty ImagesStep 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
Featured image by zamrznutitonovi/Getty Images
Below, Angel shares the skincare products that make her skin glow and her go-to makeup looks.
Check out her routines below.
Skincare
Vogue/YouTube
Angel starts with La Roche-Posay Hydrating Gentle Cleanser. “I love skincare. Makes me feel good, makes me feel cleanse, especially after a long day because I’m always on the go,” she says. “I play sports, so my face is always drenched with sweat, and I always gotta keep it clean.”
Vogue/YouTube
Angel uses two moisturizers. She uses Fenty Skin Hydra Vizor Invisible Moisturizer SPF 30 first and follows it up with Cetaphil Soothing Gel Cream with Aloe.
"You have to use the thinnest layer and then the thickest layer," she says. "I learned these tips because one time I posted a skincare routine and they were like, you need to run that back. And they taught me you need to do thin then thick and then I could see the complete difference with my skin."
Vogue/YouTube
She keeps Laniege Lip Balm with her at all times, including during games.
Vogue/YouTube
One-Size Setting Spray is her go-to for keeping her makeup fresh on the court. “I usually spray my beauty blender with my setting spray,” she says. “People usually wet the beauty blender under the water, but why not set it with this.”
Vogue/YouTube
She rounds out her beauty routine with mascara, brows, and her lip combo using Rare Beauty Kind Words Lip Liner and Covergirl Clean Fresh Yummy Gloss. But before closing, she made sure to give flowers to the WNBA stars before her who were also known for getting glammed on and off the court.
“I gotta give kudos to the girls who were wearing makeup before. Lisa Leslie, Skylar Diggins, Candace Parker. Everybody already had their edges and their lashes, lipstick on," she says. "Tina Thompson; she used to wear a full red lip on her lips during the game, but that’s something I could probably never do.”
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Feature image by Vogue/YouTube