Y’all…Y’ALL. Even though I am an oh-so-very-proud card-carrying member of the Gemini club, I make it no secret that my favorite month of the year is October. With that being said, I live in Nashville, and so I can’t tell you how much the October that just passed totally disappointed me on the weather front. Most days, we were still clocking at around 80 degrees (what the hell?!) easily (hmph. And some folks still don’t think that global warming is a “thing”…amazing).
Now that we’re nestled into November, I’m starting to see more fall-like weather. In fact, the day that I’m actually penning this, the high will be in the 50s (awesome), plus it’s raining (even better). Since I work from home, I adore everything about what’s happening outside because, to me, it is the quintessential type of autumn experience — and the perfect backdrop to pen a piece like this.
Okay, so getting into the spa thing. Did you know that approximately 25 percent of Americans have never visited a spa before? What in the world is going on? As someone who has been, more than just a few times over the years, the kind of pampering, indulgence, and stress-releasing that a formal spa visit provides — let me put it to you this way: if you’re someone who makes New Year’s resolutions, please add making a professional spa appointment to your list. There is nothing like it.
In the meantime, I’m going to share some things that you can do, from the comfort and convenience of your home, that can help you to create your own kind of wonderful spa-like oasis — all fall-themed, all super satisfying…on so many levels. Trust me.
Autumn Vibes: How to Create a DIY Fall Spa Retreat at Home
1. Fall-Themed Scented Soy Candles
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Something that I’m always going to have in my home is some candles. I like the sensual lighting that they provide, along with the calming scents that they offer. The reason why I’m always gonna shout out soy candles is because they burn cleaner and last longer. So, before we get deeper into all of this, let’s start with the importance of getting yourself some candles (or a new set). In keeping with the fall theme — pumpkin, cinnamon, vanilla, apple, pomegranate, pine, sandalwood, bergamot, fireside, and ginger (or gingerbread) are just some that will give your home a super cozy feeling as you’re in the process of treating yourself.
2. A Fall-Themed Mocktail
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Some of the more high-end spas are going to make sure that there is some wine or champagne along with some fruit (and maybe even a light meal) that’s ready and waiting for you. So, why not mimic that experience by serving your own self a cocktail or mocktail (a drink that doesn’t contain any alcohol in it)? It can be something as simple as sparkling apple cider or as “extra” as a ginger grapefruit refresher (recipe here), pumpkin spice espresso mocktini (here), sparkling cranberry mocktail (here), pear rosemary mocktail (here), or some non-alcoholic mulled wine (here). And that’s just a small sample of how many options like these are at your Google disposal, chile.
3. A Fall-Themed Bouquet of Flowers
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Something that I used to do at the beginning of the (traditional/biblical) Sabbath (which is Friday sunset to Saturday sunset) is get myself a fresh bouquet of flowers as a way of celebrating the “ceasing of creating” (which is what Shabbat literally means). I need to get back into that because not only do fresh flowers make any space look prettier, they are relaxing, they improve our moods, and they help us to see things in a more positive light (research backs all of this).
So, set the scene for your at-home spa day by also picking up some flowers that are currently in season. Some of those include chrysanthemums, sunflowers, petunias, roses, canna lilies, Japanese anemones, African daisies, asters, coral bells, and violas.
(By the way, if you’re gonna go the professional florist route, Saturdays and Sundays are typically when they’ve got flowers on sale, while Mondays are the day when they typically restock everything.)
4. Fig and Honey Face Mask
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Okay, so from here on out, all of the treatments that I’m recommending are ones that consist of ingredients that are in season right now; ones that you can easily make from home.
That said, let’s start with how the combination of figs and honey is really good for your skin. You probably already know that figs contain fiber that can help to keep you regular; figs are also able to keep your blood sugar levels where they need to be. However, did you also know that figs are high in antioxidants that can help your skin to produce more collagen?
Some studies say that figs are great at fighting dermatitis. As far as honey goes, there are properties in it that fight bacteria (honey is actually a really good all-natural pimple spot treatment), help to brighten your skin, and can even help to fade acne scars over time. So, why not treat yourself to a fig and honey face mask?
Recipe: Fig Face Mask for Healthy Skin
5. Or a Pomegranate and Papaya Face Pack
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Another popular fruit right through this time of year is the pomegranate. It’s a bit irritating to open up, but it’s worth it once you do. Pomegranates have a whole lot of protein in them (over four grams per serving), fiber, vitamin C, folate, and antioxidants. Eating them regularly can help fight heart disease, reduce inflammation, and even give you more endurance during your workouts.
Skin-wise, pomegranates are known to effectively treat hyperpigmentation and acne and decrease signs of aging. If you bring papaya into the skin-treating mix, it will soften the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles, as well as help to keep your breakouts under control.
Recipe: Pomegranate & Papaya Face Pack for Glowing Skin(this uses the oils, by the way)
6. Vanilla Extract Skin Toner
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If you want to read the origin story of vanilla extract, it’s actually pretty interesting; you can check it out here. As it pertains to what we’re discussing today, as much as most folks only think of it as a way to flavor food, there are all kinds of health benefits that come from vanilla (in this form) as well. Vanilla extract can help to soothe coughing, decrease anxiety and depression-related symptoms, and even help to relieve period symptoms and sleeplessness.
As far as beauty goes, vanilla extract also can help to promote hair growth, slow down the appearance of aging, and keep your skin looking radiant and healthy too. That’s why I definitely had to make sure that vanilla was added to the DIY spa treatment list of recommendations. There are simply too many reasons to not overlook it.
Recipe: Vanilla Body Spray Recipe
7. Pumpkin Hair Conditioner
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Pumpkin contains a crazy amount of vitamin A (per serving) and fiber. It’s also a pretty good source of vitamins C and E, iron, and potassium. If you want to consume pumpkin for your health, it’s full of antioxidants, strengthens your immune system, lowers your cancer risk, and it can help to strengthen your bones. Your hair will appreciate this particular fruit because pumpkin is also a good source of alpha-carotene, potassium, and zinc; all of these nutrients help to soften dry hair and promote hair growth at the same time. So, if you want to pamper your hair too by also turning your spa day into a wash day (check out “Here's How To Make Wash Day Less Of A Headache”), a pumpkin hair conditioner will be delightful on a few different levels.
8. A Chrysanthemum Bath
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Without a doubt, one of the most popular flowers of the fall season is chrysanthemums. Sure, they’re pretty to look at, yet did you know that some people consume this flower in tea form because it is able to help reduce body inflammation, lower high blood pressure, and even help with weight loss? Since the properties in this flower are also high in antioxidants, and they can help to make you feel more relaxed, why not throw a couple of tea bags into your bath water?
Or, if you want to take things up a notch on the pampering tip, I found a company that sells a product that contains chrysanthemum flowers, ginger lemon, and sea salts, all for a pretty reasonable price here.
9. Fall-Scented Cuticle Oil
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Cold weather can do a real number on your hands as far as dryness is concerned. And here’s the thing — dry hands can lead to raggedy cuticles or, even worse, hangnails. That’s why it’s so important to keep your nail cuticles moisturized, even in between manicure appointments. So, while you’re in the process of doing all of this pampering, don’t forget to either pick up or make some of your own cuticle oil. It’s not hard to DIY some of it. I’ll even do you a solid by including a recipe that has an in-season floral scent in the recipe: rose.
10. Pumpkin Foot Scrub
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Thanks to the zinc, copper, and multiple forms of vitamin B, pumpkin can be really nourishing to your skin. It protects from UV ray damage (the sun is still out when it’s cold, y’all), can help to improve the texture of your skin, improves cell turnover (so that you get newer skin faster), and can soften the skin too. Keeping all of this in mind, if you’ve got dry feet and/or cracked heels, get them all the way together with an all-natural pumpkin foot scrub. When you’re rubbing your toes together (or on someone else) to keep warm at night, you’ll be so glad that you did.
Recipe: Pumpkin Pie Foot Scrub
11. Cranberry Foot Massage
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Next to pumpkins, probably the most popular fall-related fruit is the cranberry. On the health and well-being tip, cranberries are a solid source of protein and fiber, they contain compounds that help to keep your vision strong and your liver in good shape, and you probably know that they can help to treat UTIs as well. Since cranberries also contain quite a bit of vitamin C, antioxidants, and anti-inflammatory properties if your feet are exhausted and you want to give them a bit of a boost, why not massage them (did you know that foot massages increase blood circulation, ease tension and help to relieve pain and discomfort too?) with some homemade cranberry oil (with the base ingredient being cranberry seed oil)?
Recipe: Cranberry Orange Body Oil
12. Pear Lip Scrub
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I’ve always appreciated a good pear. I also like that they represent things like abundance and longevity. Anyway, they are another fruit that is in season during the fall, so try and get some so that you can get in on benefits like improved gut health, a lower diabetes risk, improved heart health, and lots of vitamin C and potassium. Since pears are also hailed as “the ultimate” when it comes to being a wonderful skin exfoliant, moisturizer, and lip treatment, that’s why you definitely should try your hand at making your own pear lip scrub. I’ve done it before and have had absolutely no regrets.
Recipe: Pear & Sugar Lip Scrub
BONUS: A Faux Maple Tree
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If there’s a signature tree for the fall season, it’s probably the maple one. It represents things like strength, protection, and endurance. You know, something that I have in a couple of rooms of my house is faux trees. I adore everything about them because they help to “warm up” my space (visually). A tree in your bathroom can definitely help that room to feel more comfortable in the most unexpected ways.
If you want to test it out and see, add a faux maple tree to that spot. You can usually find smaller ones for under $30 (on Amazon) and under $70 for “miniature” large trees (if that makes sense — an example is here on Amazon too). Stores like Michaels (here) tend to carry them this time of year as well. I promise you that it’ll be hard to get out of the bathtub of yours with that addition being close by.
BONUS: Velvet Sheets
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I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one who immediately wants to take a nap after getting pampered or pampering myself. If you want some bedding that will make you feel absolutely luxuriant, how about some sheets that are made out of velvet (or velvet fleece)? They look rich, feel super soft, are hypoallergenic, pretty easy to maintain, and will definitely keep you warm on those super chilly autumn nights.
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Listen, I’m not gonna let y’all off the hook as far as booking a professional spa appointment goes. However, as you can see, indulging yourself in your own place isn’t a bad idea either. After all, your home is your sanctuary space. So, this fall, why not spoil yourself with some pampering? As the year is starting to wind all the way down, I’m pretty sure that you’ll wholeheartedly agree with me when I say that you’ve totally earned it. Amen? Selah.
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Skylar sees things differently. At the time, she was shooting content on her iPhone. Temi came into the picture with a new perspective, an understanding of tech, and, eventually, a camera. “He doesn't give himself enough credit,” Skylar says. “He wasn't just my tripod. He wasn't just standing behind the camera and going ‘click.’ He was giving advice. He was giving me insight to how I could look at things from a different perspective. And I was like, 'Oh, he’s an artist.' I think it was maybe a heartbeat of that kind of energy of like, ‘Baby, can you take this picture?’ And it turned so quickly into, we're partners. We can work together in a way where we're advancing each other's creative thinking.”
The pair often says they’re two sides of the same coin. Skylar is an Aquarius. She attended art school, paints, and loves poetry. She’s more than happy to let the couple’s management firm and agency, Kensington Grey, handle their admin work. And, she loves to sleep in. Temi, on the other hand, wakes up early. He’s a Virgo. He loves a to-do list and regularly checks in on the couple’s brand partnerships spreadsheet to make sure everything is on track.
Because his storytelling was steeped in his love of technology, he didn’t always think of himself as a creative person. “Where I [am] the dreamer who wants to pluck things out of the sky and spend all day with my head in the clouds, Temi [is] so good at grounding me and helping me figure out how to make things make sense on paper. We just work together in such a complimentary way,” Skylar says.
It’s been more than six years since Brooklyn-based couple Temi and Skylar started dating, and nearly four since they cemented their working relationship. On TikTok and Instagram, the couple’s travel, fashion, and home content regularly rack up hundreds of thousands of views. They’ve worked with brands such as Coach, Aesop, Away, and Liquid IV, bringing their vibrant perspectives to every campaign they execute. Still, nearly two years since both Temi and Skylar committed to full-time content creation and creative directing, the couple says their romantic connection remains their priority.
“We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting,” Skylar says.
Working from home can make it hard to separate work from personal life for any entrepreneur. It can be even more challenging when your business partner is also your lover. Temi and Skylar had already used couples therapy as a tool to help them effectively communicate with one another. When they ran into challenges while working together, their therapist helped them set physical boundaries to help combat the issues.
"We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting."
“It actually took us doing very specific physical things to create boundaries between work and play in our relationship,” Skylar says. “So, for instance, we will only have conversations about work when we're out of bed or we're at the table or in the office. Initially, when we started, we had to light a candle to say that, 'Okay, this is a space where we're connecting, we’re not talking about work.' We needed really hard boundaries at the top. And then it became a little bit more organic.”
The boundaries have been crucial to implement, especially because the couple began working together so naturally. When the pair first met, Skylar was NY-based a social strategist for BuzzFeed and was using content creation to drive business to her lingerie company. She was shooting her own content. Temi was working for Microsoft in D.C. He’d recently traded in his DJing equipment for a camera. “I've always loved taking pictures,” he says. “Even when I was a kid, my African mother would wake me up at 3:00 a.m. [during a] party, and be like, 'Come take the family picture.'”
Growing up, Temi says he watched his parents support each other and be the true definition of partners. He knew he wanted the same for his own relationship. But, the couple also wanted to make sure they were being financially responsible. The pair didn’t quit their traditional jobs until they’d saved up two years' worth of their cost of living. And, Temi received his Master of Business Administration from New York University with the knowledge that it could either help him advance in his corporate career or be applicable to his business with Skylar.
Temi and SkylarCj Hart @hartbreakToday, they say their working relationship is more of a “quiet dance.” They still implement some of the boundaries they learned in therapy, but they also lean into their natural strengths and deep love for one another. When we speak, Temi has planned a date for the couple to see Princess Mononoke in 4K IMAX and added it to their Notion so they can factor it into their busy schedules. “I fully plan to date for the rest of my life,” he says.
Skylar says the couple doesn’t just wait for date nights to check in with one another, though. This often happens in the mornings, after Temi has made her peppermint tea and poured himself a cup of coffee. When they ask each other how they slept, she says, it’s not just a “nicety.” It’s a genuine question meant to foster connection.
“A lot of it happens during the day in the midst of work. We'll stop and we'll hug. Or we’ll slow dance in the kitchen,” she says. “Sometimes it's hard to set a whole date night when you have 7,000 things going on. So, we must grasp these moments and check in when we can. And I think it's become so organic to us that I actually didn't even realize how often we do it. But all day long, we're like, 'Are you good? I felt like your energy shifted,' because we're best friends, we just know. We just feel it happen.”
What’s better than being in love? Building wealth while doing it. Watch Making Cents here for real stories of couples who make money moves together.
Featured image by Cj Hart @hartbreak