

Aight. This is the kind of article that is pretty near and dear to my heart because, when it comes to caring for my scalp and hair, I have spent quite a few years trying to figure out the difference between when I've got dandruff and when my scalp is simply dry. And believe you me, it's not until you actually get that those two things are not one in the same, that you're able to get to the root of what may be causing your incessant itching, irritation and/or flaking, so that you can find some serious relief.
So, if you've already scratched your scalp once, even since reading this intro, and you're saying to yourself, "Enough is enough, dammit!", I've got some info that can definitely put you on the path towards healing your scalp and feeling much better overall.
What Is Dandruff?
So, here's the thing about dandruff. Every minute, our body sheds somewhere between 30,000-40,000 dead skin cells. Our scalp is certainly not exempt from this fact. Well, when dandruff occurs, it's the result of our scalp shedding an accelerated amount of cells. As a result, there is oftentimes noticeable flaking (flakes that are pretty large and oftentimes greasy in texture) and a significant amount of itching and scalp irritation.
As far as what causes dandruff, that is a pretty layered answer. For starters, there is a fungus/yeast that lives on most of our scalps caused Malassezia. When Malassezia gets out of control, it can result in dandruff (kind of like how when a yeast gets out of control in our vagina, it can cause a yeast infection). If Malassezia is what's triggering your dandruff, the dandruff probably won't go away until you get rid of the fungus/yeast (via topical or oral antifungal agents that may require a prescription by your doctor, depending on how bad it is). Something else that can cause dandruff to occur is a scalp that is too oily or has too much product build-up. This is problematic because oil and "gunk" is something that Malassezia actually feeds off of; that's why it's so important to keep your scalp and hair clean by washing them every 10 days or so.
Two other things that can cause dandruff that aren't discussed enough are bacterial infections and allergies. Both of these can result in the speeding up of dead skin cells. On the allergy tip, if you happen to try a new product and your scalp doesn't like it, it could end up shedding more skin cells in order to remove the product which could also cause dandruff.
As I said, dandruff is the result of all kinds of stuff. Yet knowing the main ones can help you to get to the root of what could be giving you dandruff drama.
Home Treatments for Dandruff: How to Take Care of Dandruff
Now that you know what typically triggers dandruff, I'm pretty sure you're wondering if there is anything that you can do to prevent it or, at the very least, manage it. In many cases, definitely. For starters, you might want to look into using a shampoo that has salicylic acid in it. That's a type of dissolving agent that is actually found in foods like blueberries, avocados, and pine nuts. Anyway, what it does is soften the top layer of your scalp and wash away the extra dead skin cells, so that they're less itchy and irritating. Salicylic acid also has the ability to remove oily build-up and can soothe dermatitis if you happen to have that skin issue too. (By the way, if you're low on cash, you can crush a couple of aspirin up and put them into your shampoo. It works because aspirin has salicylic acid in it.)
Next, it's important that you increase your zinc and Vitamin B intake. It's been discovered that a lot of people who struggle with dandruff happen to be low in both of these nutrients. You can take them in supplement form or you can consume foods that are high in both of these vitamins. Foods high in zinc include meat, seeds, nuts, eggs, and whole grains. Foods high in Vitamin B include leafy greens, seafood, fortified cereals, yogurt, and poultry.
If you're looking for some at-home remedies for dandruff, here are a few that are pretty effective:
- Tea tree oilcontains potent anti-microbial and anti-inflammatory properties that will fight fungus/yeast. Add a few drops of the tea tree oil to your shampoo for maximum results.
- Aloe Vera has antibacterial and antifungal properties that will not only help to protect your scalp from getting dandruff, it will also soothe your scalp as it heals from it. You can apply the gel directly to your scalp. Let it sit for about an hour and then shampoo and condition your hair as normal (just make sure the gel is 100 percent pure).
- Apple cider vinegar has the ability to balance the pH levels in your scalp. The more balanced your scalp is, the more challenging it is for fungus/yeast to thrive. Just apply one-part water and one-part apple cider vinegar as a rinse to your scalp on wash day. Let it penetrate for five minutes or so and then rinse with cool water.
- Listerine is something else that stops dandruff in its track. That's because the menthol it contains is a great fungus/yeast fighter. Simply mix two tablespoons of the mouthwash with a half-cup of distilled water. Use it as a pre-rinse before shampooing and conditioning your hair. Again, it's pretty effective.
- Manage your stress levels. It really is a trip, just how much of our overall health and well-being is tied into how stressed we are—or aren't. When it comes to dandruff specifically, when you're stressed out, your immune system is compromised. When that happens, it's easy for fungus/yeast to overtake your system.
If you try all of these DIY treatments and your dandruff does not improve, see your doctor or a dermatologist. You may need something more powerful to get the fungus/yeast under control. Also, do not skimp out on not conditioning your hair, thinking that it will help. Your scalp needs proper moisture; what it doesn't need is a ton of product build-up, so wash your hair no less than every 10-14 days (more around the 8-10 day mark while you're trying to manage your dandruff).
What Is Dry Scalp?
Now let's get into what dry scalp is all about. If you happen to live in a climate that is very dry or is extremely hot in the summer and bitterly cold in the winter; if you constantly wash your hair in hot water; if you've already got a skin condition (like eczema); if the rest of your skin is dry, or if you're dehydrated (check out "10 Overlooked Signs That You're Dehydrated"), you are definitely someone who is prone to have dry scalp.
That's because dry scalp is what happens as the direct result of your scalp not getting enough of the oil that it needs in order to stay moisturized. And, just like the rest of your body, when your scalp is parched, that can make it itchy, irritated, and can result in small flakes of dead skin coming up.
It should probably also go on record that aging can also subject you to having dry scalp, simply because, as you get older, it can be harder for your scalp to hold onto the natural sebum that your body produces. By the way, it is quite possible that you can have dandruff and dry scalp at the same time; although, if you adhere to the tips that I already provided regarding dandruff, you should be able to tell the difference between the two in no time.
Home Remedies for Dry Scalp: How to Treat Dry Scalp
As far as dry scalp goes, there are several at-home remedies that can quickly get you on the path to some real relief.
- First, it's important that you drink plenty of water. As we've already discussed, dehydration plays a real role in dry scalp, so the more water you've got into your body, the better.
- Something that can help to moisturize and heal your dry scalp is coconut oil. That's because it's an oil that has antifungal and antibacterial properties that can help to keep fungus/yeast at bay. If you're someone who likes to "oil your scalp", applying a little bit of it once or twice a week can help to make dry scalp a thing of the past.
- Foods with omega-3 fatty acids in them can help to deeply penetrate your scalp and give it extra moisture from the inside out. Some foods that have those acids in them are salmon, chia seeds, flaxseeds, walnuts and algae. While we're on the topic of diet, it's a good idea to eat more moisturizing foods, period. For some suggestions, check out "These Foods Will Give Your Skin & Hair The Moisture They Crave" on our site.
- A great rinse for dry scalp is witch hazel. It contains some powerful astringent properties that can cleanse your scalp without stripping it dry. Combine one-part witch hazel with one-part water, along with five drops of lavender essential oil (it's got antimicrobial and antibacterial properties) and five drops of sweet almond oil (it's a deep conditioner). Pour all of this onto your hair before shampooing it. Gently massage your scalp and then shampoo and condition as usual.
- Add some jojoba oil to your shampoo. It has Vitamin E and zinc in it which will help to soothe your dry scalp while moisturizing it at the same time.
Dandruff and dry scalp can both be a pain, no doubt. Yet, more times than not, they are both pretty easy to manage, so long as you know exactly what you've got and you are consistent in applying remedies to them. Here's to being scalp healthy and itch-free, sis. For real, tho.
Featured image by Shutterstock
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
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Feature image screenshot/ xoNecole YouTube
Love Is The Muse: How Skylar And Temi Built A Creative Life Together
When Temitope Ibisanmi DM’d the word “muse” to Skylar Marshai, he knew he was shooting his romantic shot. He didn’t realize, however, that he was connecting with his future business and creative partner, too.
“I was the boyfriend,” Temi says. “Everybody out there knows, you’re the cameraman at that point.”
Skylar sees things differently. At the time, she was shooting content on her iPhone. Temi came into the picture with a new perspective, an understanding of tech, and, eventually, a camera. “He doesn't give himself enough credit,” Skylar says. “He wasn't just my tripod. He wasn't just standing behind the camera and going ‘click.’ He was giving advice. He was giving me insight to how I could look at things from a different perspective. And I was like, 'Oh, he’s an artist.' I think it was maybe a heartbeat of that kind of energy of like, ‘Baby, can you take this picture?’ And it turned so quickly into, we're partners. We can work together in a way where we're advancing each other's creative thinking.”
The pair often says they’re two sides of the same coin. Skylar is an Aquarius. She attended art school, paints, and loves poetry. She’s more than happy to let the couple’s management firm and agency, Kensington Grey, handle their admin work. And, she loves to sleep in. Temi, on the other hand, wakes up early. He’s a Virgo. He loves a to-do list and regularly checks in on the couple’s brand partnerships spreadsheet to make sure everything is on track.
Because his storytelling was steeped in his love of technology, he didn’t always think of himself as a creative person. “Where I [am] the dreamer who wants to pluck things out of the sky and spend all day with my head in the clouds, Temi [is] so good at grounding me and helping me figure out how to make things make sense on paper. We just work together in such a complimentary way,” Skylar says.
It’s been more than six years since Brooklyn-based couple Temi and Skylar started dating, and nearly four since they cemented their working relationship. On TikTok and Instagram, the couple’s travel, fashion, and home content regularly rack up hundreds of thousands of views. They’ve worked with brands such as Coach, Aesop, Away, and Liquid IV, bringing their vibrant perspectives to every campaign they execute. Still, nearly two years since both Temi and Skylar committed to full-time content creation and creative directing, the couple says their romantic connection remains their priority.
“We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting,” Skylar says.
Working from home can make it hard to separate work from personal life for any entrepreneur. It can be even more challenging when your business partner is also your lover. Temi and Skylar had already used couples therapy as a tool to help them effectively communicate with one another. When they ran into challenges while working together, their therapist helped them set physical boundaries to help combat the issues.
"We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting."
“It actually took us doing very specific physical things to create boundaries between work and play in our relationship,” Skylar says. “So, for instance, we will only have conversations about work when we're out of bed or we're at the table or in the office. Initially, when we started, we had to light a candle to say that, 'Okay, this is a space where we're connecting, we’re not talking about work.' We needed really hard boundaries at the top. And then it became a little bit more organic.”
The boundaries have been crucial to implement, especially because the couple began working together so naturally. When the pair first met, Skylar was NY-based a social strategist for BuzzFeed and was using content creation to drive business to her lingerie company. She was shooting her own content. Temi was working for Microsoft in D.C. He’d recently traded in his DJing equipment for a camera. “I've always loved taking pictures,” he says. “Even when I was a kid, my African mother would wake me up at 3:00 a.m. [during a] party, and be like, 'Come take the family picture.'”
Growing up, Temi says he watched his parents support each other and be the true definition of partners. He knew he wanted the same for his own relationship. But, the couple also wanted to make sure they were being financially responsible. The pair didn’t quit their traditional jobs until they’d saved up two years' worth of their cost of living. And, Temi received his Master of Business Administration from New York University with the knowledge that it could either help him advance in his corporate career or be applicable to his business with Skylar.
Today, they say their working relationship is more of a “quiet dance.” They still implement some of the boundaries they learned in therapy, but they also lean into their natural strengths and deep love for one another. When we speak, Temi has planned a date for the couple to see Princess Mononoke in 4K IMAX and added it to their Notion so they can factor it into their busy schedules. “I fully plan to date for the rest of my life,” he says.
Skylar says the couple doesn’t just wait for date nights to check in with one another, though. This often happens in the mornings, after Temi has made her peppermint tea and poured himself a cup of coffee. When they ask each other how they slept, she says, it’s not just a “nicety.” It’s a genuine question meant to foster connection.
“A lot of it happens during the day in the midst of work. We'll stop and we'll hug. Or we’ll slow dance in the kitchen,” she says. “Sometimes it's hard to set a whole date night when you have 7,000 things going on. So, we must grasp these moments and check in when we can. And I think it's become so organic to us that I actually didn't even realize how often we do it. But all day long, we're like, 'Are you good? I felt like your energy shifted,' because we're best friends, we just know. We just feel it happen.”
What’s better than being in love? Building wealth while doing it. Watch Making Cents here for real stories of couples who make money moves together.
Featured image by Cj Hart @hartbreak