Love Where You Lease: How Dopamine Decor Turned My Space Into A Self-Love Haven
I've been told I have what many might call a "cool apartment." From my friends to my favorite aunties to my grandmother, who has been a homeowner for more than fifty years, everyone who visits tells me they can tell how much love I put into this place. I'd have to agree; I do. I lived at home until I was almost 30 years old, so when I moved out, I knew my place had to feel like I had arrived into adulthood, and it does.
I live on one of the top floors of a high-rise apartment overlooking my city. Each room in my home was painted with love and intention, a theme of African contemporary rests throughout my aesthetic and decor, and each piece of art has been carefully chosen to showcase various parts of my life and personality. Still, every once in a while, I get a comment from someone when they ask how much I've spent on furniture and decor that goes a little something like, "Girl, for all that, you could have bought a house!"
I could respond by telling them that I was raised by a single mother (who encourages me to live my best luxury-living life) whom I watched firsthand navigate all of the responsibilities of homeownership alone and that between roof replacements, countless water pumps for our flooded basement, and unreliable contractors, homeownership as a single woman isn't something I exactly want to rush into.
I could also tell them that as a woman who desires marriage, I have my whole life to have a home and pour love into it and that what I don't have my whole life to do is live in a high rise and enjoy the luxuries of a maintenance staff, gym, sauna, swimming pool, and hosting area.
I could also say that while this furniture was expensive, it will come with me to the home that I will have someday, whether it finds itself in a main bedroom, guest room, or office. But the truth is that none of that is the answer; the answer is this: I deserve to design the life that I want for myself, and in this moment, that life includes pouring love into my rental.
"I deserve to design the life that I want for myself, and in this moment, that life includes pouring love into my rental."
Courtesy of Yasmine Jameelah
While I didn't have the language for why I needed even my first apartment to feel good, I recently came across this idea called dopamine decor. Recently, researchers have discovered that decorating your home with specific patterns, textures, and colors can be good for your brain. Home living and interior design experts likeArchitectural Digest andBetter Homes and Gardens say, "The dopamine decor trend—like dopamine dressing that came before it—you just need to focus on surrounding yourself with furniture, art, and objects that make you happy."
Take this trend as an opportunity to ask yourself, are there color themes, patterns, textures, or shades that bring you joy?
Dopamine decor is inviting us to be intentional about buying what we love, not just what we see.
Courtesy of Yasmine Jameelah
Suppose you're wondering how this trend will impact your pockets. In that case, dopamine decorating is also said to help us be thorough about purchases, inviting us to be more intentional about how we shop, step away from over-consumption, and buy what we love, not just what we see. That's not to say that trendy pieces can't be what you love; the point is to focus on feeling - not impulse.
Whether you're someone who is into minimalism and needs a home that supports your mental health, or you desire unique pieces in each small corner of your home, you deserve to live in a space that feels good - to you.
So, how can you apply this trend to your rental? Here are some decor decisions that I've used to infuse decor dopamine into my apartment.
1. Colored Glass
Colored glass has had me in a trance since working with my set designer for a project with Puma. I'd never seen taper candle holders made from colored glass, and at the end of the shoot, when we'd begun to decide what we were returning to the stores, I asked her to hold the colored glass items for me because I told her that I'd use them in my new apartment. I was living with my mom and had no apartment at the time, but I was manifesting!
Two years later, from the candles that sit across my bar to my stemware and items on my mantel, colored glass fills my home.
Some of my favorite colored glass products can be found below:
2. Unique Furniture
Black women can relate to growing up and having that relative who had beautiful furniture that you could only look at; well, I wanted to change the narrative. My furniture is beautiful but also functional, and with yearly maintenance and cleaning, it will stay in this shape while I'm in my rental and when I decide on my next chapter.
Shop my favorite unique furniture finds below:
3. Black Art
When I was deciding on my artwork, I knew two things - that I wanted my artwork to be curated by Black artists and that I wanted it to reflect what I wanted to manifest in my life and bodies of work that are of importance to me.
Shop some of my favorite Black art finds:
4. Romantic Taper Candles
This one is for all the lover girlies; I have decided that I'm not waiting for an evening of romance to light taper candles. Every day that I'm living is an opportunity to romanticize my life. Lighting my taper candles reminds me that I deserve romance, and it encourages me to stay present in the beauty that each day can provide, even when I'm not in the best space.
No matter what your aesthetic, I hope this inspires you to be intentional about pouring love into your rental in 2024.
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Featured image courtesy of Yasmine Jameelah
Dubbed one of the "21 Black Women Wellness Influencers You Should Follow" by Black + Well, Yasmine Jameelah continues to leave her digital footprint across platforms ranging from Forever 21 Plus, Vaseline, and R29 Unbothered discussing all things healing and body positivity. As a journalist, her writing can be found on sites such as Blavity, Blacklove.com, and xoNecole. Jameelah is also known for her work shattering unconventional stigmas surrounding wellness through her various mediums, including her company Transparent Black Girl. Find Yasmine @YasmineJameelah across all platforms.
Exclusive: Melanie Fiona On Making High-Vibrational Music & Saying Yes To Partnership
Melanie Fiona is back! After taking a little more than a decade-long hiatus, she has officially made her return to music and blessed us with two singles, “Say Yes” and “I Choose You.” While both singles are very different from each other, they both reflect who she is today and the type of music she wants to make. In our conversation, the mom of two expressed what she learned during her time away.
“It's interesting, even when I said it is like coming back, I don't ever feel like I really left because I was always still performing. I've still been public. It's not like I went into being this recluse person or version of myself, but the thing that I really learned in this process is that I think things take time,” Melanie says in a xoNecole exclusive.
“I think often we're so caught up in it, being on the timing of demand or popularity, or, like, striking while the iron is hot and the thing that I've learned is that everything is on God's time. That's it. Every time I thought I would have been ready, or, like, things were taking too long, I had to reship some things, personally, professionally, in my life. I also gave myself permission to make a living, not just make a living, but make a life for myself.”
Making a life for herself included getting married to Grammy-nominated songwriter Jared Cotter, starting a family, and embracing new landscapes, such as podcasting as a co-host of The Mama’s Den podcast. She also began doing more spiritual work and self-care practices like meditation, sound healing, Reiki, acupuncture, and boundary setting, which allowed her to get in touch with her inner voice.
“I wasn't putting out music, and I wasn't experiencing a number one record, but I was being a number one mom,” she says.
“I was experiencing things that were allowing me to heal and get in touch with myself so that I could make new music from a space of joy and freedom, and excitement again because I definitely feel like I did lose some excitement because of just politics and industry and what it can do to your mental health and even your physical health. So giving myself the space to really just say, ‘Hey, it's okay. Everything's right on time.’”
The joy and excitement are felt in one of two new singles, “I Choose You,” which is more of a lovers rock vibe, a tribute to Melanie’s Caribbean roots. While the Grammy award-winner is known for ballads like “It Kills Me” and “Fool For You,” she is becoming more intentional about the music she makes, calling it high-vibrational music. She says her music is a “reflection of my life,” as it captures every facet, from hanging out with friends to riding around in her car.
“Say Yes” has the classic R&B vibe Melanie is known for. However, both songs are inspired by her relationship. Melanie and Jared got married in December 2020, and the Toronto-bred artist dished on their relationship. Fun fact: he is featured in the “Say Yes” music video.
“When we first started dating, I had come into that relationship post a lot of self-work. I had gotten out of a long-term relationship, I had a year and a half to date and be by myself and do a lot of work on myself alone. And when we met, I remember feeling like this has to be my person because I feel it,” she says.
“And so when we went into that relationship, and we started dating, I was very clear. I was like, I know what I want. I'm very clear on what I need, and I'm not going to withhold my truth about myself in this process because of pride or fear of rejection. I know you love me, but I'm coming with my heart in my hand to let you know that if we're gonna get there, we have to put fear aside and say yes. So that was kind of like my open letter to him, which is why the video is us having a conversation.”
Melanie also shares that saying yes to her partner has empowered her in many ways, including motherhood and showing up for herself. Her new EP, also titled Say Yes, will be available at the top of 2025.
Check out the full interview below.
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Feature image by Franco Zulueta
'Tis The Season For Nail Glam: Holiday Manis For Every Festive Mood
The holidays are an exciting time to enjoy our family and decorate our hearts out. Our Christmas tree, dining table, and style all begin to reflect the joy we feel in the season, but what about our nails? Our nails are the star of the show this time of year. They are the part of ourselves people will see when we pass around presents and Christmas dinner.
Gifting ourselves the self-care we always deserve is a no-brainer, but sometimes we can become overwhelmed with choices.
There are many different nail designs and shapes to choose from, so it can be hard to settle on one. Kia Stewart is a talented celebrity nail artist. Her love for prioritizing nail health and design has gained her an immense amount of respect in the industry. Stewart is always mindful of paying attention to her audience for trends, which has helped her stay ahead of the game. “Recently, full chrome has made a significant comeback, and the classic French manicure remains timeless. 3D nails are trending on TikTok daily, though cat-eye and airbrush styles seem to have taken a backseat this year,” says Stewart.
As far as shapes, Stewart has noticed a huge trend in almond shapes. She believes this is due to the shape being timeless and truly chic. This includes sizes of all kinds. Tis the season to indulge in short and long almond-shaped nails. “Longer styles reminiscent of the ‘90s, complete with deep French tips and vibrant reds. I enjoy the diversity in preferences, as it keeps my work interesting. But the most common trend is self-expression, everyone is wearing nails that speak to them. I champion that it’s a mood.” Keep reading to see Stewart’s work for nail inspiration this holiday season.
Almond Bliss
Want your nails to reflect the gifts under the Christmas tree this year? Try this simple, yet totally festive nail design. Stewart uses the colors red and green to create a minimal nail design that gets its point across. This style can be approached with your natural nails or acrylic if you’re looking to add length.
French Manicure
As Stewart mentioned, a French manicure will never go out of style. However, if you’re looking to spice things up, we recommend playing with color. Incorporating a deep red French tip can be just as chic as traditional white. You can even add a present design (as seen here) if you want your French to be bold. The beauty of this is that you have the freedom to express yourself as you wish.
Deep Red
If Beyoncé is doing deep red, then we should definitely do it too! This deep red seems to be the color of the fall and winter seasons. Keep things elevated with a classic deep red on your hands, or mix it up! You can pair this deep red with white, like in this photo. Having deep red as your base will keep things interesting without having to try as hard.
Chrome
These nails are perfect New Year's Eve inspo for the season. The gold and black are giving us more reason to celebrate this year despite its difficulties. Get into the season with effortless chrome nails and a cool design to match. Watch out, 2025; we are coming for you!
Vibrant Red
The best part about the holiday season is that we can embrace the colors and put our nudes to rest. This vibrant red with gold chrome undertone is a fun way to enter into the happiest time of the year. Leave the red as it is, or add white stripes to create a candy cane look. Either way, you cannot go wrong with this traditional holiday color.
Don’t Be So Green
It’s time green enters the chat this holiday season. Adding a shape of deep green to your nail aesthetic can be a different approach to typical holiday designs. We also love the hint of gold and glitter in this design to add texture and contrast. Step into your green era and go outside the traditional holiday box.
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Featured image by @tylauren, courtesy of Kia Stewart @__luxk