I've had weed in my lifetime. Smoked it. Tried a couple of edibles. One time, I underestimated the power of medicinal weed and lawd—that is another article for another day! But I'm not even close to what quite a few folks in my world are. I mean, I've got some real, top-notch, bona fide weed connoisseur in my space. And if there's one thing that they all unanimously agree on, it's the fact that if you want to take your sexual experience to another level, adding a little Mary Jane, brown sugar, cannabis into your life will definitely help you to do it.
If you're someone who is skeptical about that, I totally wrote this with you in mind. Not so much as a "commercial" for you to try cannabis yourself (to each their own, chile), but so you will consider having a more open mind about weed, in general and those who do enjoy it—whether they do so in the bedroom, out of it or both. By the way, I also wrote it for the weed-curious who are wondering if they really should believe the hype. So, are you ready to learn some of the sexual benefits that can directly come from a puff-puff-pass?
1. Weed Reduces Anxiety
If you're someone who struggles with feelings of anxiety, weed is something that could very well help you out. I once read a study that stated, out of the 9,000 people surveyed, half of them said that weed helped them to cope with anxiety, stress and depression-related symptoms more. That's because weed is capable of bringing calm and even improving one's quality of rest; especially if you're someone who is particularly sensitive to phobias, social anxiety, PTSD or sleep disorders.
How this ties into sex is, pretty much any reputable physician or sex therapist will vouch for the fact that, the reason why a lot of women struggle with climaxing is because they are overly anxious. If weed is brought into the mix, it can move your stress and tension out of the way, making it easier for you to orgasm. Sounds good to me.
2. Weed Can Give You an Energy Boost
If you're someone who is the living and breathing definition of the mind wanting to do what the body just can't seem to muster up, this is one more reason to give weed a try. There are certain strains that can legitimately give you quite the energy charge, so that you can have sex—or have it longer—than you usually do. A real popular weed pick-me-up strain is sativa. That's because it has a high THC (the compound in cannabis that gives you the "high feeling" effect) count (it sits somewhere around 22 percent). You can read more about this particular kind of strain here.
3. Weed Relieves Physical Discomfort
If you don't enjoy sex as much as you'd like to and it's strictly because you're in some type of physical pain or discomfort, weed can help here too. Not only is it able to help to modulate pain and elevate your serotonin (the natural chemical that calms your nerves and makes you feel happier) receptors but, the reality is, when you're feeling good, you tend to focus on pain less. Just one more reason to give weed a try, huh?
4. Weed Relaxes You
I'm thinking that it's a given that sex is always better when you're in a chilled out and relaxed kind of headspace. Well, something else that weed is really great at doing is taking some of the edge off, so that you are able to feel more peaceful. When it comes to this particular perk, the key is to take the "less is more approach" because, too much of a good thing, can actually trigger hyperactivity in some individuals. It's also a good idea to opt for a strain that is either indica-dominant or sativa-dominant; both of those have been proven to give the best woo-sah results.
5. Weed Can Make You Hornier
When it comes to what causes a low libido in women, the reasons run the gamut—hormonal imbalances; medical issues like diabetes, high blood pressure and arthritis; drinking too much alcohol; sleep deprivation; pain during sex and straight-up fatigue. For the record, if you're someone who normally has a fairly high drive and just recently, it has tanked, it's always a good idea to make an appointment with your doctor to see if there are any underlying health issues going on. If there's not, weed is something that can crank up your sex drive too. A strain known as limonene is one that comes with citrus scent varieties and can produce a strong euphoric feeling that can totally put you in the mood for coitus.
6. Weed Intensifies Orgasms
Can sex be good without an orgasm? Yep. Is sex a billion times more rewarding when you're able to have one? Also, yes. And guess what? There are many studies out here to support that another benefit that comes from incorporating weed into your sex life is it's able to intensify orgasms; especially our orgasms. I actually recently read an article that cited a study at Stanford Medical Heart's urology division. It said that, because weed definitely makes us less anxious and more relaxed, we don't overthink and less overthinking leads to 1) more orgasms and 2) better ones.
7. CBD Lube Is the Ultimate Weed Complement
This platform is such a fan of CBD lube that we actually did an article on it. Please make sure to read "Why Cannabis Lube Is The Best Thing To Get Yourself For V-Day" when you get a chance. In the meantime, if you want the Reader's Digest version of why you should, at the very least, add some of this kind of lubricant into your sex collection, I'll share a couple of solid reasons.
For one thing, lubricant always makes sex better, especially for us, because the wetter we are, the more pleasurable sex can be. As far as CBD specifically, it is the non-psychoactive compound in weed that comes with many medicinal benefits. Sexually, it's great because it's able to heighten sensitivity in your genital region and also help to decrease any discomfort if you happen to have a partner who is "blessed" in the packing department (if you know what I mean).
BONUS: Make Sure to Consider the Strain
Something that you might've noticed is, when it came to a few of these points, I also made sure to mention a particular kind of strain of cannabis as well. The reality is, not all weed is created equal; different kinds come with a different backstory and set of benefits. So, if there's a specific type of "effect" that you're looking for, it's a good idea to do some research on the strains that exist out in these streets. A site that can help you out is Leafly and an article that can help you out on the site is "The best strains of all time: 100 popular cannabis strains to try before you die". As far as where to cop various strains, this link here will help you to know if your state has legalized medicinal and/or recreational weed and this link here is just one place where you can order from dispensaries online.
Oh, and if you decide to go the edible route, just keep in mind that it can be hard to know how much weed—and therefore, how much THC—is in a brownie or cookie. If there's too much, you can easily go from swinging off of chandeliers to literally climbing the walls. So, on that tip, proceed with caution.
Welp. There you have it. Seven solid reasons why sex and weed do mix. In a really big, hot, erotic and euphoric kind of way. Wheeeeew.
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
Reset Your Relationship: How To Start 2025 Strong With Your Partner
As the calendar turns and a new year unfolds, many of us are laser-focused on our career goals, fitness resolutions, and vision boards that outline the journey to our best selves. But amidst all the planning and self-improvement, have you made room for another important part of your life? Your relationship.
It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Step 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Step 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
Step 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
Featured image by zamrznutitonovi/Getty Images
Alaska Wasn’t On My Bucket List, But My Glacier Adventure Made Me A Believer
We all have bucket list destinations at the top of our lists. I visited one of those at the top of 2024: Japan! But what happens when you get an opportunity to go someplace that wasn’t on it? For me, that was Alaska. Now, I’d submitted my short film to the Anchorage International Film Festival, genuinely thinking it would be a long shot to get in with a short film about fibroids and Black women’s health.
However, to my surprise, I received an email that read: “It’s with great excitement that we announce your film, Super High: A Period Piece, has been selected for the 24th Anchorage International Film Festival.” After looking at the flight distance from Atlanta to Anchorage—a solid 10 hours one way— I’d decided this would be one I wouldn’t attend.
That was until there was a follow-up email that shared that the festival was sponsoring two excursions for filmmakers: A Northern Lights Tour and A Glacier Hike.
With that, I knew I had to make the trip to the 49th state! I flew Delta, which offered the shortest layovers—just 50 minutes each way. For a more comfortable flight on the longer legs that were about six hours between my layover city and Anchorage, I upgraded to first class with an in-app discount for $256 (the regular price of a first-class ticket runs about $2,100), which was so worth it for additional space and service for the six-hour trek.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
"So What’s Alaska Like? Did You Have To Wear a Snowsuit? What’s the Food Like?"
These are among the major questions I’ve gotten. Anchorage reminds me less of a bustling major city and more of a small town with an easygoing feel. When I arrived, they’d just had snow a few days before, so it was cold, and the streets were slick. So, I was so happy I’d invested in a pair of snow boots. For my first few days, the locals said it was warm. Warm to them being 20s at night and mid-30s during the day.
However, by the time I left, fresh snow was on the ground, and temps were well into the single digits—and it felt like it. Oh, the sun doesn’t rise until 10:30 a.m., and it sets around 4 p.m. That was among the most challenging things to experience because I felt like I never really woke up. So, between the lack of sun and the four-hour time difference, I felt tired the whole time I was there.
As for food, I didn’t explore a ton because I was so cold. But I found two gems! First was Whiskey and Ramen. If you enjoy ramen and exceptional service, this is a must-visit. I’d make a trip back just for their Wagyu ramen and their special take on an old fashion!
And, for coffee, I thoroughly enjoyed That Feeling Co. The coffee was great, and being surrounded by plants helped to perk up my spirits.
The Northern Lights
Iceland is one of the most popular places to see the Northern Lights, so I was very excited to know that Alaska also gets to see the Aurora Borealis light show. Typically, many people visit Fairbanks to see them, but there are tours offered in Anchorage too! When prepping for the late-night tour, we’d heard that the night we were heading out to see the lights, the cloud coverage likely meant we wouldn’t be able to see them. Bummer. I know. So, we could sit the tour out or still try. But, in my mind, I was like, why would I come all the way to Alaska not to try?
So, at about 9:30 p.m., we piled into vans and headed out to chase the Northern Lights. We traveled about an hour and a half from Anchorage, and when we stepped out of the van, it was cold and pitch black. And unfortunately, after a couple of hours in the cold, those clouds in the sky never parted for us. I know that when we see the posts of people who do get to see Mother Nature do her thing, we don’t have all of the context of the science, which is Aurora Borealis.
Sometimes, the weather just doesn’t do what we earthlings would like, which can lead to disappointment. However, our guide did give a recommendation. When you book a trip to see the lights, give yourself four to five days to see them. Don’t bank on one day because, at the end of the day, this is science.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Now, On to the Glacier!
Just six hours after returning from the Northern Lights tour, we were up for the glacier tour because they were back-to-back! I was exhausted and so excited. If someone had told me I’d hike on a glacier, I would have given them a mean side-eye. I mean, where on earth does one climb a glacier? Let me share a few destinations with you, just in case you want to plan an icy adventure: Switzerland, Norway, Iceland, Chile, Argentina, and Alaska.
Aside from the fact the Matanuska Glacier is 22,000 years old, it’s the largest glacier accessible by car in the United States—27 miles long and four miles wide, making it one of the easier ones to see IRL. As a girlie with generalized anxiety disorder, I get anxious about doing this kind of thing because I know that to see these world wonders is usually a mountainous trek.
This one was two hours long, one-way, up snow-capped, windy, mountainous terrain. However, my therapist always reminds me to push myself to do what scares me (as long as it’s for a reason, of course). I held my breath for the journey there and back! And white-knuckled it from time to time, too.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Once we got there, we were surrounded by fresh, fluffy snow, and it was COLD! In the negative cold. I was thankful, I’d over-prepared. If you even go on a glacier tour, I recommend a few things: Balaclava, heavy-weight gloves, cashmere socks, snow boots, and lots of layers.
Here’s what I wore. My first layer was Ann Taylor leggings and a Wolford Turtleneck. Then, I layered a cashmere turtleneck and cashmere joggers. A COACH down vest, which I’d recommend anyone own just for winter, in general, because it’s SO warm! For my feet, I wore Ann Taylor cashmere socks (I love these because they’re affordable and so warm) and Adidas Adifom Superstar Winter Boot and topped all of that with a Brandon Blackwood ankle-length parka. I know BB is known for his accessories, but the brand’s outwear is truly amazing and worth the investment. After two hours on the ice, I felt great!
If you’re open to adventure travel, I highly recommend putting a glacier tour on your list of things to do. There are a few reasons. First, standing on an ice age-old massive piece of glacier was my 2024 version of touching some grass. I was reminded that I’m a speck on this spinning rock and need to spend more time grounded in that fact as I move through the world. I looked to the sky and thought of how proud my ancestors would be, even though I know they’d be telling me to get my butt home and off a dog on a glacier!
Secondly, I gained an ever-large appreciation for Mother Nature as I learned that glaciers are the world's largest reservoir of freshwater, containing around 69% of the world's freshwater. Again, another fact that helped me gain perspective. Lastly, it’s just fun and stunningly beautiful!
After this, I’m looking forward to my next cold-weather adventure! Iceland and Argentina are at the top of the list!
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Featured image courtesy of Bianca Lambert