Whether it's your mind or your bedroom, clutter has the power to make any woman feel so overwhelmed (as if we didn't already have enough going on).
While the decluttering trend has been poppin for quite a while now, it's safe to say there is no better time than now to take it on. Taking a day to declutter your physical and mental space can make a world of a difference. This is coming from someone who loved to keep everything until I found out living a borderline hoarder life wasn't cute…so clean out, declutter, and refresh.
Here are some reasons you should think about decluttering your life ASAP:
Free Your Mind
The phrase is more than an En Vogue song that's still the jam to this day. But seriously, from clothes to unopened mail, to socks to blankets, having clutter in your home, car, and office space can make your mind feel cluttered too. And this isn't a one-and-done thing. You can't really free your mind without freeing your physical space, especially at home. There's a pretty big chance you'll feel like you have to go somewhere else just to obtain peace of mind and think, when the answer could be as easy as clearing out your area and making room.
Get That Beauty Sleep
Having clutter piled up has this weird way of making you always feel tired, but somehow, it never actually allows you to get any sleep. The nerve, right? I think we've all had that mess that we get tired just thinking about having to clean up. But, the effort it takes to declutter, even if you have to do one room or one space at a time, will be worth it when you can look at the same area that used to stress you out and breathe a sigh of relief before you get some much-needed sleep. Plus, how can you sleep with a pile of clothes and other unmentionables on your bed, floor, and everywhere in between?
Helps Decrease Anxiety
…And stress. Seriously, research has proven there's a connection between anxiety, stress, and the amount of clutter you have in your home. This has the potential to make you overeat, and just be an emotional eater in general, which not only makes you gain unhealthy weight but impacts your mental and physical health. On the upside, once you decide to declutter, your mood will be much better. I can attest to the emotion of having too much clutter and always feeling like you have to get your life together. But once you remove it, you'll be happier and might even be ready to have company without feeling like you have to throw everything under your bed and in the closet...or am I the only one who does that?
Focus On Fleek
Oh, the places you can go once you declutter. Instead of giving your attention to seemingly overpowering piles of items here and there, picture a clean and open space that will help you get inspired and motivated with ideas. Whether it's cleaning your kitchen to make a meal or cleaning out your office to get more done at work, decluttering will have your focus on 10. Now, you can finally tap into your creativity, be even more productive, and make clearer decisions.
Goals Don’t Seem Impossible
Decluttering can also help you set and reach goals. You probably know how hard it is to even try and accomplish anything when you have a pile of mess to focus on instead. If you clean out the clutter and replace it with items that inspire and motivate you, you'll be able to really take time to think about what you want out of life, and the goals and dreams you've been hoping to achieve. But, proceed with caution, because the items that inspire you can turn into more clutter, and you'll have to repeat the process all over again.
You Could Actually Save Some Coins
Having clutter around could actually be costing you money. Have you ever had that moment when you can't find your lipstick, or your favorite scarf, so you count it up as a loss and go buy a new one? It might not seem like a major life changing purchase, but that ish adds up when it comes to your coins and the amount of clutter you have. Plus, if you haven't embraced paperless billing and get your bills mailed to you, it will be easy to forget to pay a bill, and those late fees are no joke.
That Pile Can’t Keep Piling Up
And I say this out of love. But girl, if you don't take care of it, it will only get worse. And we both know that's not healthy for your mental, physical, emotional, or any other type of space you have in and out of your body. This was a reality I had to come to terms with too. As easy as it is to ignore the clutter and subconsciously make it bigger (because who has time to clean up?), it only makes things worse for every part of you. Seriously, I know how much of a chore taking the time to declutter is, but it will make a world of a difference.
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Skylar sees things differently. At the time, she was shooting content on her iPhone. Temi came into the picture with a new perspective, an understanding of tech, and, eventually, a camera. “He doesn't give himself enough credit,” Skylar says. “He wasn't just my tripod. He wasn't just standing behind the camera and going ‘click.’ He was giving advice. He was giving me insight to how I could look at things from a different perspective. And I was like, 'Oh, he’s an artist.' I think it was maybe a heartbeat of that kind of energy of like, ‘Baby, can you take this picture?’ And it turned so quickly into, we're partners. We can work together in a way where we're advancing each other's creative thinking.”
The pair often says they’re two sides of the same coin. Skylar is an Aquarius. She attended art school, paints, and loves poetry. She’s more than happy to let the couple’s management firm and agency, Kensington Grey, handle their admin work. And, she loves to sleep in. Temi, on the other hand, wakes up early. He’s a Virgo. He loves a to-do list and regularly checks in on the couple’s brand partnerships spreadsheet to make sure everything is on track.
Because his storytelling was steeped in his love of technology, he didn’t always think of himself as a creative person. “Where I [am] the dreamer who wants to pluck things out of the sky and spend all day with my head in the clouds, Temi [is] so good at grounding me and helping me figure out how to make things make sense on paper. We just work together in such a complimentary way,” Skylar says.
It’s been more than six years since Brooklyn-based couple Temi and Skylar started dating, and nearly four since they cemented their working relationship. On TikTok and Instagram, the couple’s travel, fashion, and home content regularly rack up hundreds of thousands of views. They’ve worked with brands such as Coach, Aesop, Away, and Liquid IV, bringing their vibrant perspectives to every campaign they execute. Still, nearly two years since both Temi and Skylar committed to full-time content creation and creative directing, the couple says their romantic connection remains their priority.
“We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting,” Skylar says.
Working from home can make it hard to separate work from personal life for any entrepreneur. It can be even more challenging when your business partner is also your lover. Temi and Skylar had already used couples therapy as a tool to help them effectively communicate with one another. When they ran into challenges while working together, their therapist helped them set physical boundaries to help combat the issues.
"We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting."
“It actually took us doing very specific physical things to create boundaries between work and play in our relationship,” Skylar says. “So, for instance, we will only have conversations about work when we're out of bed or we're at the table or in the office. Initially, when we started, we had to light a candle to say that, 'Okay, this is a space where we're connecting, we’re not talking about work.' We needed really hard boundaries at the top. And then it became a little bit more organic.”
The boundaries have been crucial to implement, especially because the couple began working together so naturally. When the pair first met, Skylar was NY-based a social strategist for BuzzFeed and was using content creation to drive business to her lingerie company. She was shooting her own content. Temi was working for Microsoft in D.C. He’d recently traded in his DJing equipment for a camera. “I've always loved taking pictures,” he says. “Even when I was a kid, my African mother would wake me up at 3:00 a.m. [during a] party, and be like, 'Come take the family picture.'”
Growing up, Temi says he watched his parents support each other and be the true definition of partners. He knew he wanted the same for his own relationship. But, the couple also wanted to make sure they were being financially responsible. The pair didn’t quit their traditional jobs until they’d saved up two years' worth of their cost of living. And, Temi received his Master of Business Administration from New York University with the knowledge that it could either help him advance in his corporate career or be applicable to his business with Skylar.
Temi and Skylar
Cj Hart @hartbreak
Today, they say their working relationship is more of a “quiet dance.” They still implement some of the boundaries they learned in therapy, but they also lean into their natural strengths and deep love for one another. When we speak, Temi has planned a date for the couple to see Princess Mononoke in 4K IMAX and added it to their Notion so they can factor it into their busy schedules. “I fully plan to date for the rest of my life,” he says.
Skylar says the couple doesn’t just wait for date nights to check in with one another, though. This often happens in the mornings, after Temi has made her peppermint tea and poured himself a cup of coffee. When they ask each other how they slept, she says, it’s not just a “nicety.” It’s a genuine question meant to foster connection.
“A lot of it happens during the day in the midst of work. We'll stop and we'll hug. Or we’ll slow dance in the kitchen,” she says. “Sometimes it's hard to set a whole date night when you have 7,000 things going on. So, we must grasp these moments and check in when we can. And I think it's become so organic to us that I actually didn't even realize how often we do it. But all day long, we're like, 'Are you good? I felt like your energy shifted,' because we're best friends, we just know. We just feel it happen.”
What’s better than being in love? Building wealth while doing it. Watch Making Cents here for real stories of couples who make money moves together.
Featured image by Cj Hart @hartbreak