Cree Summer Opens Up About Being A Single Mother: ‘You Find What Sisterhood Is About’
Since her days as Freddie on A Different World, Cree Summer has captivated audiences with her free spirit, beauty, and style. Since starring in the beloved sitcom, the actress has been working behind the scenes voicing cartoon characters such as Susie Carmichael on Rugrats and Numbuh Five on Codename: Kids Next Door.
During that time she also released music and became a mother to two daughters Brave and Hero with her now ex-husband Angelo Pullen. In an interview for Style Like U, Cree opened up about navigating motherhood as a single mom. The 52-year-old always knew she wanted to be a mother before she even knew what that meant. “I had turned 40 and then their (her daughters’) father appeared. He literally appeared. He bought the house across the street,” she said. “He moved in here. We had a really nice, almost a decade together, really good. And then when that relationship ended I became a single mother.” She called becoming a single mother the “greatest fear of my life.”
Growing up, Cree had a great relationship with her parents and she was a “daddy’s girl.” So, becoming a single mom was hard for her to deal with. “I just fell apart, in front of my girls too and they got to see me. Because I have to tell you, that destruction was the best destruction of my life in retrospect,” she said. “I am a totally different person after that. Probably a couple of years ago I would have said I was abandoned but now I say I was really liberated. And my daughters got to see me hanging on by a mosquito [inaudible] right? And then they got to just see me soar.”
She added, “And I think now the greatest, biggest job as a mother is to be yourself.”
Another thing she found since she and her daughters’ father split is sisterhood. While she didn’t go into specifics about it, she did gush about having a sisterhood of women to help guide you through the changes.
“I often find when you go through a separation and you’re on your own as a single mother, boy you sure find what sisterhood is about for real, right ‘cause your sisters come in, especially the ones that have been through it already,” she said. “They come in and they tell you that there is another side.”
Cree and her daughters formed a band called Mama and the Savages and the actress shared how much she loves spending time with her girls. “The thing that I feared the most is the thing I love the most. I feared doing it on my own and I love doing it on my own. Who would of known?”
Cree Summer Proves That Freedom Is Not Giving A F*ck What Anyone Else Thinks
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For Us, By Us: How HBCU Alumni Are Building Legacies Through Entrepreneurship
Homecoming season is here, and alumni are returning to the yard to celebrate with their friends and family at the historically Black colleges and universities (HBCUs) that have changed their lives forever.
No matter where their life journeys have taken them, for HBCU students from near and far, returning to where it all started can invoke feelings of nostalgia, appreciation for the past, and inspiration for the future.
The seeds for these entrepreneurs were planted during their time as students at schools like Spelman, North Carolina A&T, and more, which is why xoNecole caught up with Look Good Live Well’s Ariane Turner, HBCU Buzz’s Luke Lawal and Morehouse Senior Director of Marketing and Comms and Press Secretary Jasmine Gurley to highlight the role their HBCU roots play in their work as entrepreneurs, the legacy they aim to leave behind through the work that they do, and more as a part of Hyundai’s Best In Class initiative.
On Honoring HBCU Roots To Create Something That Is For Us, By Us
Ariane Turner
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When Ariane Turner launched Look Good, Live Well, she created it with Black and brown people in mind, especially those with sensitive skin more prone to dryness and skin conditions like acne and eczema.
The Florida A&M University graduate launched her business to create something that addressed topical skin care needs and was intentional about its approach without negative terminology.
Turner shared that it is important to steer clear of language often adopted by more prominent brands, such as “banishing breakouts” or “correcting the skin,” because, in reality, Turner says there is nothing wrong with the way that our skin and bodies react to various life changes.
“I think what I have taken with me regarding my HBCU experience and translated to my entrepreneurial experience is the importance of not just networking,” Turner, the founder and CEO of Look Good, Live Well, tellls xoNecole.
“We hear that in business all the time, your network is your net worth, but family, there’s a thing at FAMU that we call FAMU-lee instead of family, and it’s very much a thing. What that taught me is the importance of not just making relationships and not just making that connection, but truly working on deepening them, and so being intentional about connecting with people initially, but staying connected and building and deepening those relationships, and that has served me tremendously in business, whether it’s being able to reach back to other classmates who I went to school with, or just networking in general.”
She adds, “I don’t come from a business background. As soon as I finished school, I continued with my entrepreneurial journey, and so there’s a lot of that traditional business act and the networking, those soft skills that I just don’t have, but I will say that just understanding how to leverage and network community and to build intentional relationships is something that has taken me far and I definitely got those roots while attending FAMU.”
On Solving A Very Specific Need For The Community
Luke Lawal Jr.
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When Luke Lawal Jr. launched HBCU Buzz, his main focus was to represent his community, using the platform to lift as they climbed by creating an outlet dedicated to celebrating the achievements and positive news affecting the 107 historically HBCUs nationwide.
By spotlighting the wonderful things that come from the HBCU community and coupling it with what he learned during his time at Bowie State University, Lawal used that knowledge to propel himself as an entrepreneur while also providing his people with accurate representation across the internet.
“The specific problem in 2011 when I started HBCU Buzz was more so around the fact that mainstream media always depict HBCUs as negative,” Lawal says. “You would only see HBCUs in the mainstream media when someone died, or the university president or someone was stepping down. It was always bad news, but they never shed light on all the wonderful things from our community."
So, I started HBCU Buzz to ensure the world saw the good things that come from our space. And they knew that HBCUs grew some of the brightest people in the world, and just trying to figure out ways to make sure our platform was a pedestal for all the students that come through our institutions.”
“The biggest goal is to continue to solve problems, continue to create brands that solve the problems of our communities, and make sure that our products, our brands, our companies, and institutions are of value and they’re helping our community,” he continues. “That they’re solving problems that propel our space forward.”
On How Being An HBCU Alum Impacts The Way One Shows Up In The World
Jasmine Gurley
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Jasmine Gurley is a proud North Carolina Agricultural and Technical State University alum. She is even more delighted with her current role, which enables her to give back to current HBCU students as the Senior Director of Brand Marketing and Communications and official press secretary at Morehouse College.
“It was a formative experience where I really was able to come into my own and say yes to all the opportunities that were presented to me, and because of that, it’s been able to open the doors later in life too,” says Gurley of her experience at North Carolina A&T. “One thing I love about many HBCUs is that we are required to learn way more about African American history than you do in your typical K through 12 or even at the higher ed level."
She adds, “It allowed us to have a better understanding of where we came from, and so for me, because I’m a storyteller, I’m a history person, I’m very sensitive to life in general, being able to listen to the stories and the trials that our ancestors overcame, put the battery pack in my back to say, ‘Oh nothing can stop me. Absolutely nothing can stop me. I know where I came from, so I can overcome something and try anything. And I have an obligation to be my ancestors’ wildest dreams. Simultaneously, I also have a responsibility to help others realize that greatness.
Gurley does not take her position at an HBCU, now as a leader, lightly.
“People think I’m joking when I say I’m living the dream, but I really am,” she notes. “So I wake up every day and know that the work that I do matters, no matter how hard it might be, how frustrating it may be, and challenging it. I know the ripple effect of my work, my team, and what this institution does also matter. The trajectory of Black male experiences, community, history, and then just American advancement just in general.”
On the other hand, through her business, Sankofa Public Relations, Gurley is also on a mission to uplift brands in their quest to help their respective communities. Since its inception in 2017, Sankofa PR has been on a mission to “reach back and reclaim local, national, and global communities by helping those actively working to move” various areas of the world, focusing on pushing things forward for the better.
“Through Sankofa, we’ve worked with all different types of organizational brands and individuals in several different industries, but I would think of them as mission-based,” says Gurley.
“So with that, it’s an opportunity to help people who are trying to do good in the world, and they are passionate about what they’re doing. They just need help with marketing issues, storytelling, and branding, and that’s when my expertise can come into play. Help them get to that moment where they can tell their story through me or another platform, and that’s been super fulfilling.”
Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
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Between the election cycle, trauma, workplace environment, and expectations placed upon us by society, Black women are existing in a world where our lived experiences result in higher rates of chronic stress. In tandem with that reality, are Black women leading the charge in the wellness industry for a world that centers our health and wellness needs, but who cares for those leaders and supports them?
Oftentimes, they do the work themselves. xoNecole talked with several wellness founders who own adaptogenic beauty brands, intergenerational wellness collectives, nonprofit organizations, and wellness apps. Here's what they shared about how they center themselves when emotions are high and they feel dysregulated.
Remind Myself I Deserve A Calm Nervous System
"A year ago, I made a decision that I refused to be in a constant state of anxiety while running a wellness company. You're probably thinking that should be a given, right? But it's so easy to become overwhelmed by your business's daily responsibilities and overall growth goals and ultimately put your needs on the back burner. What regulates me and brings me back to myself are the daily habits that gave me the life and community I have now—starting my day with prayer and exercise, swimming weekly, baths by candlelight, listening to neo-soul and jazz to end my day.
"But most importantly, I've learned to remind myself that when I feel overwhelmed, I deserve a calm nervous system. I don't have to let every change, every decision, every obstacle, every uncomfortable conversation rattle me. I ground myself in that and remind myself daily that being dysregulated doesn't serve me."
Music, Scents, & Breathwork
"As a founder, it's easy to 'push through' and ignore your true emotional state because you're on a mission. But my true purpose is to live well and show others that we all deserve to live well. Music, scent, and breathwork are my most frequently used tools for emotional regulation. Music can get me through anything. Scents—whether they be perfume, diffused oils, or candles—ground me. Breathwork saves me from spiraling. My practices are extremely simple, but they work for me."
Time to Myself
"As a wellness founder, I regulate myself emotionally on a daily basis by putting on my favorite record, taking a hot shower, watching my favorite show, and eating foods that comfort me. It honestly depends on the day, but generally, it's whatever will bring me joy for a moment and allow me to zone out. I really need that time to myself—to just be—in order to pour back into my community."
"By challenging myself to view my negative anxious thoughts with self-compassion and grace, I create space to validate the way I feel but reframe the thought to be more balanced and supportive. Example: 'I can't believe I dropped the ball on that' after being challenged and reframed turns into 'Baby girl, you are trying the best you - remember you only have only two hands.' Or, 'I failed' turns into 'Sis, you tried.'"
Moving My Body
"One way I emotionally regulate as a wellness founder is through movement. I spent about five years doing talk therapy, and I made a lot of breakthroughs, but now, in my 30s and this era in my life, I realize how much stagnant energy is really just a matter of me literally moving my body. So exercising, walking, and making sure I'm not sedentary has done wonders for me to ground myself daily. Right now, I'm really enjoying taking sculpt classes, low-impact cardio, and hot yoga. I always feel better after I move my body; it's therapeutic."
Practice What I Preach
"Managing daily stress and anxiety varies for me depending on my personal and professional seasons. My three go-to self-care strategies are reminding myself that rest is productive and actually resting, prioritizing my weekly tasks, and taking a few minutes for breathwork. It's important to me to practice what I encourage others in my community to do."
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Featured image by Rob Kim/Getty Images for Global Connections for Women Foundation or GC4W