
Chilli And Mýa Share Their Secrets For Remaining Flawless And Fabulous

Something that I like about when a new show premieres is all of the press that happens leading up to it. Take VH1'sGirls Cruise (starring Lil' Kim, Chilli, Mýa, Vena E., B. Simone, Tiffany Panhilason and Char Defrancesco) that airs tonight at 8 p.m. (EST), for example. It's been about eight years since Chilli's reality series What Chilli Wants aired (on the same network) and, I don't recall ever seeing Mýa on a reality show before. So yeah, it's been a pleasant surprise to see them making their media rounds.
Over the weekend, something that I caught was a VH1 promo that featured Chilli and Mýa. At first glance, I thought to myself, "For Chilli to be 48 and Mya to be turning 40 this fall, they are killin' the game." They really are too. Both of them appear to have flawless skin, healthy hair and really good muscle tone. I was so impressed that I went back to the first TLC single ("Ain't Too Proud to Beg") when Chilli was around 21 and Mýa's first song ("It's All About Me" feat. Sisqo) when she was somewhere between 17-18 annnnd, I kid you not, neither of them look too much different than they did—wow!—over 20 years ago!
When anyone has the ability to barely age, of course, I want to know their beauty secrets. How cool is it that Chilli and Mýa took out some time to share what theirs are. Get this—virtually all of them are natural, affordable and, clearly, extremely effective.
"Some good genes and taking care of your body, your temple, that is the key right there because I have seen many Black, that cracked," Chilli mentions towards the end of the interview. "I'm not lyin'; it's the truth. So, I understand that saying but…"
Mýa agrees for the most part but adds, "I would definitely say that with darker skin, you can withstand the sun a lot longer and so…you are known for aging less and slower. But, Chilli's right. If you don't take care of yourself, or you're smokin' and drinkin' and abusin' your body, not hydrating or you know, drinkin' a lot of chemicals or eating a lot of chemicals, it's gonna show up on the outside, so take care of you..." Indeed.
That's the overall consensus from the ladies, but out of the little-over-four-minutes segment, here are some of their specific beauty takeaways that I think you might dig.
Chilli’s Beauty Secrets
"Listen, don't believe that saying when they say, 'Black don't crack.' It does crack. You have to take care of your skin…I'm a product junkie. I think that's very wise, because again, you don't know what's gonna work with your skin. Everybody's skin is a little different." Two things that Chilli are huge fans of are eye patches and drinking lots of water. Chilli also says, "And as much as I love the sun, it's really not a good idea to hang out too much in the sun."
Something else that Chilli does is use avocado on her hair. According to her, it's a really good hair mask. "Right when it turns brown and I'm like, 'I don't wanna eat it no more', you shouldn't throw it away…that's a waste. And honestly, water, water, water. If you stay super-hydrated, your skin…that pH balance is everything. It makes a huge difference in the body because…you want your body to be less acidic and more alkaline."
Mýa’s Beauty Secrets
"I am really into natural remedies to maintain the glow," shares Mýa. "I started with cucumbers on my eyes…I'm vegan, and so I believe, like, what you put in your body definitely affects your skin." Mya also notes that she doesn't drink alcohol but will make an exception for red wine due to the antioxidants that are in it.
Something else Mýa does is make her own peels out of fruits and vegetables. She also uses coconut oil as her make-up remover. "For masks, tightening, like I just use pure avocado and even mango," says Mýa. "It gives you a nice tightening and moisture." When Chilli asks if she makes a puree out of the food, Mýa shakes her head from side to side and says, "Nope. Straight from the peel. I take the avocado out of its little dish, mix it up and that's it. Even mango peels, I use the inside of the mango peel, where the mango residue is left over and it tightens your face." Mýa is also a fan of using shea butter as a sunblock and skin moisturizer.
As I was listening to these two beautiful women break their beauty regimens down, I didn't take lightly what they shouted out. If cucumbers and mangos have them lookin' like that, I wanted to make sure that I—and you—knew more about what we could get out of them. Here's what I discovered.
Water
If you're feeling drained, irritable or constipated, it just might be that you are dehydrated. If so, you're not alone either because, while our bodies consist of over 60 percent water, a whopping 75 percent of us are not only dehydrated, we arechronically dehydrated.
Something that both Chilli and Mýa sang the praises of was drinking plenty of water. It removes toxins, boosts energy levels, increases mental productivity, keeps joints feeling good and is even known to treat and prevent headaches and migraines.
And just what kind of water should you drink to get the most benefits? Reverse osmosis water literally uses reverse osmosis to remove most contaminants from the water. Word on the street is it's so pure that you can try and freeze it and it won't. Distilled water is a blander form, taste-wise, of reverse osmosis. Something to keep in mind with these is if you're not feeling well or you're fasting, they can be good options. But as far as drinking them every day, purified water doesn't only lack contaminants but minerals too; so, they might not need to be your daily go-to option.
Also, remember how Chilli said that it's important that your body is more alkaline than acidic? A type of water that will help to keep your pH levels in check is alkaline water. Because it has a higher pH balance than tap water, some believe that it is able to neutralize the acid in your system. Then there is spring water. Although it is marketed as being "natural", that's very similar to how "organic" is oftentimes misused for marketing purposes. Meaning, if you do decide to go with spring, do some research on the company that sells it before shelling out your cash. Also, read articles like "The Truth About Tap". Sometimes, you're better off just putting a filter on your faucet than buying or drinking bottled water (did you read about how arsenic is in some brands?!).
Oh, and if you're like me and you're not the biggest water fan or, worse, you tend to drink more soda than water (something that Chilli and Mýa say is an absolute no-no), perk the water up by making some infused water or drinking some sparkling or mineral water with a dash of juice in it. Not too much juice though, because they have recently linked consuming too much of that to cancer. SMDH.
Avocado
Something else that both Chilli and Mýa are fans of is the fruit avocado. As far as your insides go, avocados are loaded with Vitamin K and also have a good amount of vitamins B5, B6 and C, folate and potassium (more than a banana, in fact). Something else that's awesome about avocados is they don't have any cholesterol or sodium in them, and they are low in saturated fat. Some other benefits include the fact that they are able to keep your heart healthy, the fiber in them can keep you regular, plus they are able to lower your cholesterol and help your body to better absorb nutrients from plant-based foods.
One of the reasons why avocados are so good for your hair and skin is because they've also got plenty of antioxidants in them. If you want to try them as a DIY hair mask, simply mix one ripe avocado with two tablespoons of grapeseed oil, two tablespoons of raw honey and five drops of lavender essential. Mix everything together until the texture is smooth and creamy. Then apply the mixture to your freshly-washed damp hair. Let it sit (with a plastic bag on your head) for 30 minutes and rinse with warm, then cool water (to seal your hair's cuticles). Your tresses should feel really soft right after.
Cucumber
A food that is made up of more than 90 percent water is the cucumber. So yeah, if you're dehydrated, snacking on one of these (with a little bit of vinegar or sea salt) can get you some of the fluid that your body needs. Cucumbers also have a ton of Vitamin K in them, as well as Vitamin C, fiber, magnesium, manganese, potassium and even two grams of protein. Since cucumbers have so much water in them, they are a low-calorie food; this means they are great if you want to snack on something while you're trying to shed a few pounds. Cucumbers can also help to reduce blood sugar levels, detoxify your system and soothe muscle and joint pain.
Why do so many people put them on their eyes? Thank the combo of the Vitamin C and silica that's in cucumbers. Vitamin C helps to reduce inflammation. Silica is a mineral that heals the skin; it also makes hair and nails strong and shiny too.
If you want your skin to look dewy and youthful, try making some of your own cucumber mist. It's pretty easy to do, but probably easier to understand if you watched it being made. You can check out a video here.
Mango
It looks like you're reading this just in time because, although you might see mangos in your produce department year-round, they are actually at their peak from February until right around now (mid-July). Aside from how absolutely delicious mangos taste, they also contain a high amount of Vitamin C and copper (something you need more of if you're experiencing any premature greying). Mangos also have vitamins A, B5 and B6, E and K, along with potassium, manganese, magnesium, folate, niacin and fiber in them. All of these nutrients work together to boost your immunity, strengthen your eyes, increase your digestive health and lower your cancer risk.
The antioxidants in mangos will help to produce more collagen in your system so that you can have healthy hair and glowing skin. Take advantage of the properties in this particular fruit by combining four tablespoons of mango pulp with one teaspoon of raw honey and two teaspoons of sweet almond oil. Mix everything well and put it all on your clean face and neck for 15 minutes. Then rinse with cool water. If you do this once a week, you might be able to give Mýa a run for her money!
Shea Butter
Something that used to be an annual ritual for me was getting a big container of shea butter at the local African Street Festival. Now I buy mine on Etsy and, all these years later, if there's one thing that I think every Black woman should have in her possession, it's this. Shea butter is considered to be a "skin superfood" and rightfully so because it contains vitamins A, E and F, and oleic, linoleic, and stearic acids. Together, these properties deeply moisturize your skin; reduce any skin inflammation; minimize breakouts; soften the appearance of acne scars; protect the skin from UV rays (just like Mýa said); reduce the appearance of stretch marks; increase skin elasticity and make your lips extremely kissable. Just make sure to look for some raw and unrefined Grade A shea butter. Trust me, not all shea butters are one in the same.
If you want to make some of your own sparkling shea butter lip balm, this video will walk you through how to do it.
As you can see, Chilli and Mýa said more than a mouthful when they broke down some of their beauty secrets to us. So, next time you're at the grocery store, pick some of these items up. When it comes to looking radiant and beautiful, these foods (and the shea butter) definitely have your back. Chilli and Mýa have the looks to prove it.
Watch the clip in full here.
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
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Feature image screenshot/ xoNecole YouTube
Are You & Your Partner Financially Compatible? Here’s How To Tell.
With nearly half of all marriages that end in divorce citing finances as the nail in the coffin to deading their relationship, financial compatibility is one aspect of long-term compatibility that doesn't get talked about enough. Beyond the circular 50/50 discourse and whatever hot-button issues regarding providers and the like, at its core, financial compatibility is about how well your financial behaviors, values, and long-term goals align with those of your partner.
More than it is about how much money a person makes or doesn't make, financial compatibility focuses on how you think about money, how you spend your money, and most importantly, how you plan for the future with your money. Think, questions about money mindsets, spending habits, debt, budget, etc. Are you a saver and he's a spender? Do you see money as a tool for freedom? Does he see it as something to hold on tightly to as a means of survival? Can you talk about your financial goals and plans openly?
Knowing if you and your partner are financially compatible can save a lot of heartache, a lot of headaches, and a lot of money in the end. Keep reading for a few key indicators to pay attention to and learn whether or not you and your partner are truly aligned financially.
Signs You’re Financially Compatible
1. You can talk about money without judgment.
Conversations about money aren't something you dread. You're able to talk to your partner freely and openly about money matters, like debts, bills, the budget, etc., even when it is uncomfortable. There is an understanding that talking about money doesn't have to be something you're on the defense about, instead it's an opportunity for transparency, clarity, and solutions.
2. You respect each other's money personalities.
What is a money personality? According to Ken Honda, author of Happy Money, a money personality is our "approach and emotional responses to money" and there are seven money personalities we can fall under. These personalities can help us understand our own relationship with money, as well as our partner's. For example, maybe you're someone who likes to treat yourself to a fancy dinner once a month and your partner is someone who believes ordering takeout and not cooking meals at home is a cardinal sin.
When you can respect each other's money personalities, neither approach is subjected to judgment and shifts can be made in each other's spending habits as needed and from a place of love versus guilt or shame.
3. You agree on what it means to have "financial security."
Whether it’s building a stacked emergency fund, paying off debt before putting a downpayment on a home or being able to splurge on a baecation without checking your account balance before the bill arrives, your definitions of what it means to be financially secure are in sync, or at least compatible enough to reach a compromise.
4. You are not each other's "financial parent."
You’re not constantly teaching, fixing, or stressing out over what the other person is doing with their money. Although I fast-forwarded through a lot of the most recent season of Love Is Blind, I did pay attention to Virginia and Devin and money seemed to be a recurring theme in their conversations. It was clear Virginia had her ish together when it came to money and her financial plans for the future and Devin was not quite on her level.
Though she said no at the altar for additional reasons, I could also see how sis could eventually get very tired of being her partner's second mama, so to speak. And that's the thing about being your partner's "financial parent," eventually, you could end up feeling like you are one-half of a "parenting" or "teaching" dynamic with your partner instead of feeling like you're equals in a partnership.
5. You make financial decisions with each other in mind, not for each other.
Whether it’s booking a trip, deciding which debt to tackle first, saving up for a big purchase, or planning out your next move, there’s a mutual respect for each other’s input. Those shared goals might look like wealth, freedom, stability, or just a debt-free life that feels soft and secure.
You don’t have to be chasing the same bag in the same exact way, but you do need to be aligned on the vision. What you're building should feel like a joint venture with shared effort and purpose, not one of y’all making major money moves like you're still single. Making financial decisions is not just about where the money goes, it's about where you’re going together.
6. You're aligned when it comes to the big stuff.
Financial compatibility extends to the long-term of money management. The legacy, structure, and shared responsibility that comes with decisions like shared accounts, estate planning, having babies, or even blending families. Will you split bills or combine income? Who’s taking time off if you have a child? How do y’all feel about generational wealth or investing for your family’s future? You and your partner have had the real conversations.
These conversations can’t wait until after the wedding or until after a baby’s here. They’re the foundation for how you function as a unit, and if you're not aligned, or at least willing to get on the same page, that incompatibility can cause friction in the end that love alone can't fix.
Love is cute and all, but building an empire together? That’s the real flex. Tap into our new series Making Cents to see what financial compatibility really looks like when love and legacy go hand in hand.
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