In the early days of working alongside the famed choreographer Fatima Robinson, Charm La’Donna was given the ultimate test.
Robinson was multitasking and needed to focus her attention elsewhere, so she left an eighteen-year-old La’Donna alone to work with about 20 dancers. Despite the fact that she’d been dancing since she was a toddler and toured with Madonna at 17, this was still an anxiety-inducing experience for the youngest dancer in the room.
It was one of La’Donna’s first jobs working as an assistant choreographer under Robinson, who recently served as head choreographer for Beyoncé's "Renaissance World Tour" after a long career of working with artists ranging from Michael Jackson to Meghan Trainor. Still, La’Donna says the dancers immediately respected and affirmed her. “They were like, ‘Charm, you got it,’” she says. The teenage dancer led them through the routine she’d prepped with Robinson until the more seasoned choreographer returned. “Her trusting me put more trust in myself.”
Using the experience she gained working under Robinson for about eight years, Charm La’Donna has been able to make a name for herself as a choreographer in her own right. Today, she’s worked on performances for some of the biggest stages in the world.
Credit: Ro.Lexx
From The Weeknd’s Super Bowl performance to Dua Lipa’s forthcoming headlining set at Glastonbury Festival in the UK, she’s helped some of the biggest artists of the past decade turn their hit songs into memorable live performances. She’s also worked on some of the most memorable music videos of this time, winning Best Choreography for her work on Rosalía and J Balvin’s “Con Altura” music video in 2019. In 2022, she embarked with Kendrick Lamar on the "The Big Steppers Tour" as lead choreographer.
Listening to La’Donna describe her career as a choreographer, it’s hard not to feel like the universe carefully orchestrated her life to ensure her success. Working in the entertainment industry has certainly had its challenges. But there are also so many things that went right in order for her to succeed.
La’Donna was ten years old when she auditioned for her first music video and met her mentor, Robinson. She recalls nailing the routine in rehearsals, but freezing once the artist, Ma$e, walked into the room. “I just started crying. I had the steps, and then when everyone walked in…it was the first time I’m seeing artists in real life. I’d see these people on TV. Now they walk in, I’m ten years old, and I’m supposed to be dancing…blank,” she says. She went home and spent the night practicing, determined not to mess up again.
Credit: Ro.Lexx
During the summer between high school graduation and her first semester of college, La’Donna was hired to tour with Madonna. “I’d never left the United States, barely California,” she says of the experience. “It definitely opened my eyes and it made me even hungrier.” She got back to California the day before her classes started at UCLA.
Although she eventually obtained a bachelor’s degree in world arts and culture, La’Donna says she’d initially planned to drop out of college. She was already working as a dancer and was having difficulty juggling her professional responsibilities with her classes. But, in 2006, when La’Donna began attending UCLA, she was one of just 96 African-American expected students out of nearly 5,000 incoming freshmen. Her Black classmates urged her to stay the course.
It’s been a decade since Robinson’s protégé branched out on her own, working with Selena Gomez on the promotional performances for her 2013 album Stars Dance and then choreographing Meghan Trainor’s 2014 music video “All About That Bass.” (Robinson served as the video’s director.) Despite all of her training and hard work, La’Donna says stepping out on her own still came with a steep learning curve.
Under Robinson, she could focus on being creative without having to worry about the business aspects. That allowed her to cultivate her style as a choreographer. As she stepped into the role of lead choreographer, she had to come into her own as a leader and business owner. “Stepping out and then having to be the one to be the voice on the calls, the one that people are calling to get answers…I was nervous,” she says.
La’Donna credits artists such as Gomez with recognizing her hunger and encouraging her as she stepped out on her own. “I definitely have had some angels in my life and God has blessed me 100 percent to guide my path and my journey to be where I am,” she says.
"I definitely have had some angels in my life and God has blessed me 100 percent to guide my path and my journey to be where I am."
Credit: Ro.Lexx
One of the things that has been so fun to witness about La’Donna’s career is how her work with artists such as Dua Lipa and Kendrick Lamar has pushed them out of their comfort zones and opened them up to dance and move in a way that fans might not have expected. “I love working with people who don’t have a dance background. There’s a type of freedom to the body. There’s no expectation. When they move, you really get to see who they are with no training, right? I get to cultivate and help nourish what that is,” she says. “I love when people say ‘This person can’t do this or can’t do that’ and then we show them otherwise. For me, that’s the best.”
"I love working with people who don't have a dance background. There's a type of freedom to the body. There's no expectation."
@charmladonna Rich Spirit | Choreographed By Yours Truly 🫶🏾 #charmladonna #choreography #richspirit #kendricklamar
“Sometimes when you work with people who are super trained with dancing, they have an idea of what it should be already because they have that knowledge,” she continues. “Instead of being like, this is my body [but] I don’t know how I want to move, let’s figure it out. That’s when you get the raw, and you get who people are.”
Charm La'Donna is on set for an undisclosed project when we speak in early May. She says there’s a lot of new creative endeavors she’s working on that she can’t reveal just yet, but her work with Dua Lipa and Meghan Trainor will continue in the coming months. She choreographed a performance for Chloe x Halle several years ago, but says she’d love to work with them again on a larger project if they release more music. She’d also love to work with Beyoncé, following once again in Robinson’s footsteps.
As she continues to grow in her career, La’Donna says she feels compelled to mentor aspiring creators along the way, as an homage to the women who helped make her career possible. “I’ll stop what I’m doing for any of the kids I mentor,” she says. “I can’t imagine my life without a Fatima [Robinson] or without a Madonna believing in me at such a young age. Or without my mom, my grandma, and all of these people who believed and supported me. It’s not even an obligation. I just do. I know my calling. I know why I’m blessed.”
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Featured image by Ro.Lexx
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But Shellie, I don’t like them. Sex feels better without them. In an unbelievably ideal world where everyone waited until marriage and then remained with their spouse until death, you could be out here raw-ing it. With that not being even close to the case, though, it’s time to stop trying to skirt around using condoms and, instead, it’s time to figure out which ones can give you maximum pleasure.
Believe it or not, I’ve got a few tips, in the rubber shopping department, that just might help you out.
First Up, Most Women Can Tell When a Condom Is On
GiphyMy guy friends and I tend to have the most random conversations, boy. Take the time when two of them were trying to debate me down about whether or not women can tell if a condom is on. Their vote is that we can’t. Mine was that we absolutely can. And I mean, shouldn’t the one with the vagina (me) have a say, fellas? LOL. Hey, they don’t have to take my word for it because science also states that based on the material that the condom is made out of and how well it fits on a woman’s partner (more on that in a sec), they definitely help her to know if a guy is wearing one or not.
Not only that but data also backs up that a condom can also diminish the sensation that women feel during sex to a certain extent — not to mention that, sometimes, rubbers can affect natural vaginal wetness too.
With condoms having a 98 percent success rate at preventing STI/STDs and unwanted pregnancies (when used correctly, that is), by no means am I even coming close to implying that you shouldn’t use them (especially if you’re not in an exclusive or monogamous relationship [check out “Why I Use The Word 'Monogamous' In Marriage And 'Exclusive' In Dating”] and you and your partner don’t get tested annually).
All I’m saying is if you want to get the most out of your condom use experiences, you shouldn’t just assume that whatever condom the guy has on tap is what will work well for you — and figuring out what will bring you the most (pun intended) pleasure means that you should consider the following points.
Make Sure the Condom Fits Your Partner Well
GiphyWith the average size of a man’s penis being a little over 5” when it’s erect (relax, vaginas are around 4” unless stretched), it really is time to let all of the Magnum dreams go. And what I mean, specifically, by that is, guys bringing those just to fit into some stereotype of “packing” is doing no one any good because if it’s too big for him, it will result in slippage and if it’s too big for you, it could make sex a bit uncomfortable.
And what if it’s too small? Well, that could be semi-painful for him which could cause his performance to struggle. Bottom line here: condoms should have a snug fit and cover the entire penis.
And if you want to purchase some for your own collection — well, if y’all are close enough for him to be inside of you, you shouldn’t feel uncomfortable talking to him about which kind/brand of condoms you should have on tow at your house. By the way, for tips on how to choose the right condoms, check out verywellhealth’s “Condom Size Chart: Finding the Brand and Style That Fits Best.”
Opt for Condoms That Are Free of the Following Things
GiphyWhile reading an article on what many doctors consider to be the best condoms, what stood out most to me was a female doctor who said that women must keep in mind that whatever goes into their vagina, also gets absorbed. This includes ingredients that condoms may be made out of including parabens, fragrances, GMOs (genetically modified organisms), synthetic dyes and flavors, and glycerin (for starters).
And gee, when you’ve got that stuff, not only inside of you, but moving around at a semi-rapid pace (at least some of the time), there’s a pretty good chance that your vagina isn’t gonna be very happy about it.
The remedy? Consider investing in some organic/vegan condoms — ones that are free of all-a-dat. Loveability makes some (here). Smile Makers make some (here). HANX makes some (here). And that’s just a few options to choose from. This point is a very valid one to keep in mind because, sometimes, it’s not the condom that’s pissing us off — it’s what it’s made out of that’s the actual issue.
Pre-Lubricated Condoms Can Improve Your Partner’s Stroke
GiphyIf you’ve never tried pre-lubricated condoms before, you definitely should because they can have your back, on the sexual pleasure tip, on a few different levels. For one thing, these types of condoms can definitely decrease the chances of a rubber breaking which can give you the peace of mind that you seek during the act. Also, condoms that have lube in them can make it easier for your partner to put it on, can make it more comfortable when it’s time for his penis to go inside of you and can reduce the amount of friction that you feel (especially if you’re not naturally wet enough) while you’re having sex.
While we’re on this topic — I don’t know why (so many) people think that they can’t get an STI/STD from oral sex because they absolutely can. So, if you are going to use a condom during fellatio (or a dental dam during cunnilingus), adding some flavored lube to an already flavored condom (like perhaps this brand here or this brand here) can make the experience much more…satisfying.
Polyisoprene or Polyurethane Condoms MAY Reduce Yeast Infections
GiphyOkay, this point is a bit tricky because, technically, condoms can’t give you a yeast infection; in fact, since they prevent sperm and semen from entering into your vagina which can potentially throw off your pH balance, rubbers usually play a role in preventing them.
Still, I wanted to include this due to what I said earlier about all of the “extras” that can sometimes go into making a condom — because those things? They might irritate your vagina which could ultimately lead to a yeast infection. Plus, if on the off chance, you’ve got a latex allergy, condoms that are made from that material could give you a yeast infection too.
The solution to both? Consider going with alternatives like polyisoprene or polyurethane. Although polyisoprene is more expensive than latex condoms, they are super comfortable and latex-free (although you can use them the same way that you would a latex condom, including when it comes to oral and anal sex).
Meanwhile, polyurethane deserves a shout-out because it’s actually stronger than latex and it can even handle oil-based lubricants (which is something that latex is not able to do). Polyurethane is also thinner than latex and polyisoprene which means that sex can end up feeling more intense for you with those.
Textured Condoms Are Bomb If Orgasms Are Your Goal
GiphyUh-huh. I keep trying to tell y’all that if you want your partner to be sensitive about and thoughtful towards how your vulva appears (check out “Did You Know That There Are 10 Different Kinds Of Vaginas? Yep.”), the jokes about uncircumcised men really need to cease; especially since word on the street is the extra skin can actually make sex more intense for them while giving women more orgasms in the process.
And that actually helps to make sense of why textured condoms can cause women to cum more often and consistently as well. Thanks to the tiny ribs and dots on textured rubbers,they have the ability to stimulate the nerves that are inside of your vagina far more and easier than “regular” condoms do. Oh, and if you add someCBD lube to them? LOOK. OUT.
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I’ll be real with y’all — when it comes to condoms, I think it’s always important that their purpose is protection over pleasure as far as how they are made. Still, with all of the advances in them out here — and now that you have this info as far as what your vagina would prefer — rubbers don’t have to feel like a downer. The right one can have you and your vagina climbing walls — plus, you can have the peace of mind that your health and family planning preferences aren’t being compromised in the process.
Music to your vagina’s ears. 90s R&B, to be exact…I bet. LOL.
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