Can you believe we are almost a year in quarantine? Me either! Although most of us have found ways to adjust to quarantine as best as we can, 365 days of quarantine can still do a number on anybody: including our health. According to the CDC, studies have shown an increase in stress, anxiety, depression, substance abuse, fatigue, etc. amid the pandemic. Me personally? I have recently been experiencing a strong case of tired and tested, more commonly known as burnout.
The lack of separation between home life, work life, and social life has truly done a number on my my mental and my physical. I no longer have the same energy, focus, or as much patience as I used to. But, with the summer just around the corner and high hopes of getting a little more freedom, I'd still like to get this ass and my health on point. In order to kickstart my health and wellness journey, I tapped Grae Wellness, a Black-owned one-stop shop for all things wellness.
The New York City-based business is equipped with a massage, acupuncture, and fitness studio all in one. The owner, Timothy Grae - is a master massage therapist and healthcare provider with one mission to help his clients recover, rejuvenate, and restore. I had the pleasure of being trained by Timothy as he showed me 6 at-home workouts we all can do for a better butt.
Walking Lunge
Celeste Polanco for xoNecole
According to Tim, "the most important thing you can do if you want a nice ass, is a walking lunge." In order to properly do a walking lunge, he instructed:
"Bring the right foot forward into a forward step. Front bend in the knee and put the foot back at a 45-degree angle. Now arms straight-up over your head. You will feel a bit of a pull on your back hip, this position is called Warrior I in yoga. Now, that's also a walking lunge. Push through your heel and stand straight up and you'll feel it in your butt."
Although I have done lunges in the past, I would typically have to do a few sets before I felt any type of impact on my glute. After Tim showed me the correct form to do a proper lunge, I felt the impact on my glutes almost instantly. He also taught me the power of stabilization through weights.
"If a person is trying to get the glute, they need to do walking lunges. We also have something called a fireman carrier with a walking lunge; it's when you have two weights. You can have your dumbbells, kettlebell, or any type of weight you have to stabilize."
Three-Legged Dog
Celeste Polanco for xoNecole
For the three-legged dog exercise, Tim instructed: "In yoga, the Warrior III [Pose], it will look like this: All the front leg is stabled and the back leg will go straight back. Remember to keep your eyes directly on something and hold. Now to go extended, bring your hands to the floor and keep that leg up. Hold for three-second and bring the foot down. Make sure the foot touches the floor and bring it right back up."
I loved how Tim took yoga-inspired workouts and turned them into impactful glute exercises. My glutes were on fire during this particular workout. I have to be honest, it took your girl a minute to find her balance. Once I found something solid to focus on, the workout became much easier.
Celeste Polanco for xoNecole
However, during the workout, I realized this exercise might not be practical for those with stability issues. I'm happy to report: Tim had no problem coming up with a solution. Here is an modified version of the three-legged exercise, if you suffer from stability issues.
"If that person has stability issues, you can sit in an all-fours position. Place your wrist under your shoulders, extend the leg back, and pulse. Now to make it hard, you can bend the knee and pulse. You can also bring it out now you're working all aspects of the hip."
Squats
Celeste Polanco for xoNecole
I know what you're thinking, Duh, squats give you a nice ass, sis! And sure, you might be right. A huge part of it is how you are doing your squats. Tim had strong opinions on the influence of squats and why most of us are doing it wrong.
"Most people that do squats don't squat for depth which gives you a fuller range to pull up; that is the extender muscle. If you squat down; you have to extend to get up. That's the engagement of the glute. What we have to start asking ourselves is: 'What athlete, person, or thing is doing?' Follow what they're doing. Not what's popular because your influencer is doing their job to influence you."
I am a squat girl. I love regular squats, jumping squats, and even squats with weights. My squats have lifted my butt to some degree but never given me the results I've always desired. After taking Tim's advice on looking at athletes vs. influencer workouts; I noticed the difference between squats and results. I'm not saying all influencers squat the same way, but I do notice a pattern. We are not nearly squatting as low as we need to.
"A squat in particular is the only exercise that you physically do what the exercise says. To add that depth you want to try to have the feet going out a little more, like a 40-degree angle. Then you want the knees to go out. When the knees go out, it drops the center of the body down: rather than your butt going back and having instability because you don't have good ankle mobility."
Tim goes into detail on what people can do to promote ankle mobility:
"If you don't have good ankle mobility, you can't squat the way you see on social media. Mobility classes are more important than just starting to workout. You need to know about your body before you start wrecking it."
Deadlifts
Celeste Polanco for xoNecole
I have never been a huge fan of deadlifts. I always found deadlifts boring and a strain on my back. Working with Tim allowed me to find my correct form and have an impactful rep. Once I corrected my form, I noticed there wasn't a strain on my lower back. I learned the key is to squeeze at the top, avoid hyperextending, and take it slow.
"One of the most important things for a nice ass is a dead-lift. It works the posterior chain. A deadlift is lifting dead weight, but it's a hip hinge motion. The only thing that is moving is the top part of your body. When we are hip-hinging, you're keeping the leg straight and only a slight bend in the knees. Your feet must be directly under your shoulders, that way your body is properly positioned. Slowly reach for the floor, come up, and squeeze [the butt]."
2-in-1 Squat and Deadlift with Kettelbell
Celeste Polanco for xoNecole
The last two workouts Tim showed me can be done with a kettlebell, dumbbells, or any small weight you have at home. This workout is perfect for anyone on-the-go.
"We are using the same concept as a deadlift, just with a kettlebell. What you are going to do is; reach for the kettlebell toward the floor while pushing your butt toward the wall. You'll be able to feel your hamstrings get tighter as you lean. Make sure to hold the kettlebell with both hands, have your arms extended, and shoulders back."
The kettlebell helped me with resistance, which in return encouraged me to go slower. Although the weight was small, I still felt a great amount of impact. The best part was the added weight didn't affect my back at all. Looking back, I know it is because Tim helped me correct my form.
Celeste Polanco for xoNecole
"Now for the squats version. You squat to drop the kettlebell and come back up. Now, you squat again and pick up the kettlebell. Remember to squeeze and go low."
Featured image by Celeste Polanco for xoNecole
- 5 Tips To Get Your Waist Snatched - xoNecole: Women's Interest ... ›
- Best Fitness Apps For Tracking Fitness: - xoNecole: Women's ... ›
- 6 Best Full Body Workouts - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love ... ›
- The Best Butt Exercises For A Booty That Won't Quit - xoNecole ... ›
- 5 Easy Hip Opening Stretches For Beginners - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
- Question: Do You Have A 'Butt Care Routine'? You Should. - xoNecole: Lifestyle, Culture, Love, Wellness ›
- 14 Best Butt Workouts At Home You Can Do Without Equipment ... ›
- 14 Butt Exercises to Do At Home Without Weights | SELF ›
- 25 Butt Exercises You Can Do At Home For Strong, Toned Glutes ›
- 15 Best Butt Exercises You Can Do At Home For A Glute Workout ›
- 15 Best Exercises to do at Home for Stronger Glutes and a Bigger Butt ›
Reset Your Relationship: How To Start 2025 Strong With Your Partner
As the calendar turns and a new year unfolds, many of us are laser-focused on our career goals, fitness resolutions, and vision boards that outline the journey to our best selves. But amidst all the planning and self-improvement, have you made room for another important part of your life? Your relationship.
It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Step 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Step 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
Step 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
Featured image by zamrznutitonovi/Getty Images
This Millionaire Lawyer Proves Principles and Strategy Can Still Lead to Wealth
Blake Walker Esq.’s story is not your typical "get rich quick" tale—it's a blueprint for building long-term wealth through strategic thinking, savvy investing, and faith. Blake’s journey took her from behind the scenes in entertainment and sports to becoming the Chief Legal Officer at Gala Games, a pioneering blockchain and entertainment company.
Along the way, she’s learned the importance of saving, investing, and setting herself—and her loved ones—up for lasting financial success. In this exclusive conversation with xoNecole, Blake shares the key money lessons she's learned, including how to make your income work for you, the power of multiple revenue streams, and why you don't need to be Instagram or TikTok (RIP,..maybe?) to become a millionaire.
Whether you're looking for investment tips or just need a mindset shift around money, Blake’s advice proves that with the right strategy and mindset, real wealth is possible.
On her background
Well, I’m originally from Baltimore, Maryland, but I was primarily raised in Scottsdale, Arizona. I was heavy into entertainment and sports growing up. Actually, in high school and college, I had my own radio show. But college is when I got into technology, Bitcoin, and cryptocurrencies. I’ve always loved research and the idea of being ahead of my time. I think that’s what led to a lot of my work.
My background includes working in the NBA for the Phoenix Suns, behind the scenes in production at companies like NBC Universal and Lionsgate, and then I transitioned into technology. Now, I’m the Chief Legal Officer of a large tech company that also incorporates entertainment and sports. So it’s full circle.
A lot of past experiences from the industry and in general, led me here. Entertainment, sports, and tech taught me to save, make, and invest money and set myself and my family up for a successful future.
I don't feel like I would have gotten that in other industries that are non-financial. I think you see a lot of people making mistakes in entertainment and sports. I've been taught about management of funds, not only by my parents but from my experiences at work.
On her relationship with money
So I grew up well, I always start with that to give my parents credit. But one of the reasons I’m so passionate about sharing my voice is because I noticed there was such a difference between my family in Arizona and my family in Maryland. The opportunities are vastly different.
I learned very early on about investments, stocks, and bonds. Also, I’ve never seen my mother work a regular job. She's always had her own business since I was young - so I learned the power of entrepreneurship. My mom would teach me about business and building something from the ground up. She started with not a lot and then skyrocketed into this massive business that took care of our family for over 20 years.
My Dad was really big into investments and stocks, learning about different currencies across the world and teaching about the importance of banking and the importance of saving. So from both of them, I had a pretty solid foundation that money is not everything. Being rooted in God and the Holy Spirit is what matters and being a blessing to others. But if you are not being a good steward of your finances, then how are you going to be a blessing for others?
I learned very early on about investments, stocks, and bonds. Also, I’ve never seen my mother work a regular job. She's always had her own business since I was young - so I learned the power of entrepreneurship. My mom would teach me about business and building something from the ground up. She started with not a lot and then skyrocketed into this massive business that took care of our family for over 20 years.
On unhealthy financial habits
I would say for me, the number one thing was shopping. Because I had access to funds at a young age, I had to learn what’s important early. Just because you have it doesn't mean you should spend it. That's where saving comes in. It’s all about balance. I mean, some people save too much, and that can come from a survival mindset.
Some people just spend it all because they think that the fountain is endless and money will just keep coming. Both are terrible concepts and routes to go down. Personally, I just had to learn to reel it in with fashion purchases. It was my stress relief. Some people go to the gym, some people eat, some people read a book, right? I would go to the mall, right? I had to learn to save and spend - that took away the guilty feeling.
On budgeting
I’ll tell you about mine for the year. It’s basically all about my fixed bills (like rent, mortgage, utilities, our payments, things of that nature). Then, I also have a budget for food, beverages, and going out. And I have a shopping budget so that I stay within a certain range. Also, I have an investment budget.
The way that you can do that with the investments is to figure out how much you make, then make sure a certain percentage of what you're making - net income is going towards investments. I don't care if it's small, something that you think won't make a difference. You never know what it’ll do years from now, and make sure those investments are spread throughout wherever they go. Finally I also have a budget for saving.
People operate differently. You can actually take the money out of your account and put it in an envelope or transfer it to an entirely different account. Speaking of bank accounts, it’s good to have one where your check is deposited and then a certain portion that you transfer over. You can have different accounts for transferring to a single account, they transfer to an investment account, so you can keep track of where your money is flowing to.
On a time when she struggled financially
When the market crashed, things were just hard. The life we were accustomed to, we just weren’t able to live anymore. It was like 2008 or 2009. I want to say I was 18, and it was such I strange time. I remember thinking, how do we pivot?
It taught me how much the market has an impact on our families. The biggest lesson, though, was the importance of planning. For me, it was all about learning how to have a strong foundation. We just had to keep going no matter who was calling or what bills were coming - we just kept going. It taught me a lot about the power of mindset.
It taught me how much the market has an impact on our families. The biggest lesson, though, was the importance of planning. For me, it was all about learning how to have a strong foundation. We just had to keep going no matter who was calling or what bills were coming - we just kept going. It taught me a lot about the power of mindset.
On her multiple streams
I have my salary that I make with the company that I work for. I work for a company called Gala. We're a blockchain technology company and entertainment company. And then, I also have what's called an unfamiliar term: nodes. Nodes are essentially what they distribute, what we call tokens. So, with the distribution of tokens, I make a certain amount of money each month.
Also, I have real estate. And then I have my money in a high-yield savings account, which you get money based off of your interest. I have a Goldman Sachs account called Marcus account. So [focus on] where you have your high-yield savings, your CDs. The idea is for your money to make money for you.
What I did is I would take Bitcoin [and] Aetherium cryptocurrencies; all of those are considered multiple streams, because I make money off of them. For example, this goes back to the investment. So if I have a property and I'm making a revenue stream off of that property, you double that revenue stream by putting it in different investments.
Then, at that point, let's say I make $100,000 a month off of one property, right? Let's say $25,000 of that is put into my Marcus account [with] a 4% interest rate, and then that money makes money for me. A portion of my salary goes to buying different cryptocurrencies. Make $100,000 free, then a portion of that is going to purchasing different currencies
On creating wealth with a 9-to-5
I tell people all the time if you're working a nine-to-five and you want to start your own business, use your salary and invest in a high-yield savings account. Don't just let it sit in your regular bank account, which is like point .001% or 3% account, and then the next thing you know, you can have an extra $10,000 to go towards the business that you want to start. The money should always be working for you.
I’m not for struggle vibes. I see so many people that are in my generation, that feel like they either have to be on social media to be successful. Being a millionaire at my age, I’m telling you, there's so many other routes! And you can do it at a young age; don’t wait until you’re 50 or 60 to start figuring it out.
On your final goal
I want more properties - globally. I've already started to get into the hotel business. I want my future children to be able to have tangible assets. Basically, I want a very diverse portfolio and a lot of real estate. It’s very much about generational wealth.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image courtesy