

Sometimes, it really is crazy that no matter how much sleep I get (I pretty much make it a priority to get no less than six hours every night), I can still end up feeling mad tired. Sometimes, it's right when I wake up, other times it's around lunchtime. I work from home, so while I do know that it can ever hurt a sistah get a catnap in on the regular, I've gotta admit that sometimes, even that isn't enough. Since I don't wanna walk around feeling worn out and weary all of the time, I decided to do a little research.
If you read the title of this article and was like, "Yeah. Why is that?", while I don't promise to provide all of the answers, I'm hoping that this will at least point you into the direction of connecting some dots, so that you can go throughout your day feeling energized instead of drained (because feeling drained sucks).
Some Pretty Common Causes of Fatigue
So, what exactly is fatigue? It's when you are constantly feeling tired or exhausted, sometimes with no clear understanding of why. When it comes to what causes this to happen, there are a variety of things. Sometimes it's due to not getting enough rest (if you're getting less than six on the regular, that's not good, wise or healthy; try and make sleep a top priority). If you are anemic or borderline anemic, this can sho 'nuf zap your energy. Allergy season is a huge fatigue trigger. Depression or anxiety is another one (because it's hard to relax and rest when you're feeling low or your mind is working into overtime).
Heart disease is yet another cause of fatigue. Did you know that food allergies are as well? That actually makes a lot of sense because, since food is designed to fuel us, if your body rejects it for some reason, how do you get the nutrients that you need? An underactive thyroid, diabetes and a poor diet are also things that can lead to you feeling tired all of the time. Oh—so can a lack of exercise because when your body becomes lethargic, that can also fatigue you.
When Should You See a Doctor for Fatigue?
The reason why it's so important to know the various (main) causes of fatigue is so you can decipher what you can do on your own vs. when you need the help of a medical professional. In a sec, I will share some energy restoration hacks that can help you to get closer to your goal of feeling revived again. However, if after a couple of weeks, none of those things work and/or you've got symptoms like unexplained weight loss, shortness of breath, body inflammation, numbness, blurry vision, nonstop headaches or migraines, constant muscle weakness or cramping—all of these point to indications that there could be an underlying health issue that you may not be aware of.
Make an appointment with your physician as soon as possible, so that they can run tests and let you know for sure what is going on. Also, if your doctor does offer up a clean bill of health, it can't hurt to schedule a session or two with a reputable therapist/counselor/coach. Sometimes physicians aren't able to pick up on emotional stress or trauma and that also could be a reason why you are feeling the way that you do.
Mental health is vital when it comes to feeling energized too. Make it a priority as well. Now for the DIY hacks.
10 Quick Hacks for Boost Your Energy Levels
1. Pay attention to your posture.
Here's something that's interesting. Did you know that if you slouch it can make you tired? The reality is that when your bones are in alignment, it makes your muscles do much less work which means that your body, overall, is less weary. So, sit up straight in that office and chair. Watch the burst of energy that this one shift in your daily routine is able to provide.
2. Depend on sugar and caffeine for energy? Watch how often you do.
If sugar and caffeine are the two things that you rely on in order to get the energy boosts that you need, they actually could be working against you rather than for you, long-term. The reality is that sugar causes your blood sugar level to spike and then tank (which is why you can be hyper one moment and exhausted the next). As far as caffeine goes, while it has the ability to temporarily suppress your body's sleeping mechanism, it doesn't actually "produce" energy at all.
This is one of the reasons why, if you're tired, you can oftentimes find yourself needing more and more of it throughout the day. Sugar and caffeine are "fixes", not a real solution. You'd be better off checking out our article, "In A Bad Mood? These Foods Will Lift Your Spirits!" and snacking on something from there instead.
3. Sniff some citrus essential oil for an energy boost.
Sometimes, we underestimate our sense of smell. That said, if you're looking for an immediate midday pick-me-up, something that you might want to try doing is putting some citrus (sweet orange or lemon) essential oil on a pressure point like your temples or your wrists. It's the kind of oil that can enhance your mood and invigorate you. Just make sure that if you put it on your face that you dilute it a bit with a carrier oil like sweet almond or grapeseed; sometimes essential oils are a little on the strong side.
4. Take several online breaks.
I semi-recently checked out an article that said "infomania" can actually cause our IQ level to drop. The reality is that constantly checking emails and being on social media can overwhelm our mental circuits and totally zap our energy. This is why it's a good idea to take several online breaks throughout the day and to set firm "off hours" at night.
Whatever is happening out in cyberspace will be there when you return. Trust me.
5. Chew some gum.
A lot of us chew gum simply because we like the taste of it. But there are actual benefits that come with putting a piece of it into your mouth. Gum has been proven to reduce anxiety and stress levels, increase your alertness, help you to focus better and, because a minty flavor has the ability to stimulate blood flow as well as your senses, chewing something like peppermint or wintergreen gum can actually make you more alert too.
6. Spend some time outside.
First up, indoor air pollution is oftentimes 3-5 times worse than the pollution that is outside. Taking in too much "yuck" can drain you, off top. Also, there is a pretty common connection between low energy levels and Vitamin D deficiency. Since the sun is a great source of Vitamin D, that's why spending some time outdoors, perhaps during your lunch break, is such a good idea.
7. Turn the temperature up a bit.
This might be an ah-ha moment for you. Did you know that when the temperature drops around us, that causes our body temperature to fall as well which sends our system a cue that it's time to go to sleep (that actually provides good insight into why bears hibernate)? At nighttime, this doesn't matter much but if you're feeling chilly throughout the day, turning the thermostat up a degree or two might help you to yawn a little less.
8. Eat some honey for energy.
I'm a big fan of honey for a lot of reasons (check out "Manuka Honey Is The Ultimate Beauty Find"). The reason why it's a stellar energy hack is that honey is an unrefined sugar that can be easily absorbed into your system. And since carbs are what cultivate energy, it can only benefit you to take in a teaspoon of honey on the days when you feel super out of it.
9. Don't suppress your feelings.
Last fall, when I wrote the article, "You're Tired AF. But What Kind Of Rest Do You Need?", it explored some of the kinds of rest we need in order to feel our best selves. Well, something that I discovered about myself was that during my own fatigue moments, oftentimes it was emotionally related. Because I used to be somewhat codependent, I would sometimes stress over relationships and that would be draining. While there is definitely something to be said for being polite, respectful, and using good timing in sharing what's on your mind, if you feel weighed down on the mental tip, this too could be the cause of your tiredness. Get that ish off of your chest. You'll sleep so soundly if/once you do.
10. Have a set bedtime.
OK, raise your hand if you've got a scheduled bedtime. If you don't, that could be another reason why you're tired all of the time. Going to bed at the same time every night keeps your body's internal clock in great shape. This, in turn, makes it easier to fall asleep and wake up the next morning. I get that if you've got a work deadline or children, this may not always be possible. However, if you're sacrificing sleep for Netflix or Black Twitter, it's really not worth it. Create a schedule, read a book for about 20 minutes before the time you decide to go to sleep (reading poetry, non-dramatic non-fiction, Scripture, etc. has a way of settling the spirit), and watch how much better you feel. It's a proven hack that can give you a boost of energy. I can vouch for it personally.
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It's kinda wild that, in 2025, my byline will have appeared on this platform for (what?!) seven years. And yeah, when I'm not waxing poetic on here about sex, relationships and then...more sex and relationships, I am working as a certified marriage life coach, helping to birth babies (as a doula) or penning for other places (oftentimes under pen names).
As some of you know, something that I've been "threatening" to do for a few years now is write another book. Welp, October 2024 was the month that I "gave birth" to my third one: 'Inside of Me 2.0: My Story. With a 20-Year Lens'. It's fitting considering I hit a milestone during the same year.
Beyond that, Pumas and lip gloss are still my faves along with sweatshirts and tees that have a pro-Black message on them. I've also started really getting into big ass unique handbags and I'm always gonna have a signature scent that ain't nobody's business but my own.
As far as where to find me, I continue to be MIA on the social media front and I honestly don't know if that will ever change. Still, if you need to hit me up about something *that has nothing to do with pitching on the site (I'm gonna start ignoring those emails because...boundaries)*, hit me up at missnosipho@gmail.com. I'll do what I can. ;)
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
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Feature image screenshot/ xoNecole YouTube
Egypt Sherrod & Mike Jackson On Love, Business, And Financial Transparency On The First Date
Egypt Sherrod and Mike Jackson have captivated us on their HGTV show, Married to Real Estate, and podcast Marriage and Money.
Now, they have teamed up with TurboTax to assist small business owners with tax and financial support. The couple met while working in radio, and now they own multiple businesses together. While working with your spouse can have its ups and downs, they wouldn’t have it any other way.
“Besides the fact that I get to work with the person I love doing what I love to do, right? There's the aspect of our daughters, seeing us work together as a unit and actually doing it successful,” Mike tells xoNecole in an exclusive interview
“So they get to grow up and experience what it is to be entrepreneurs from ground level, right? Because Mom and Dad did it, and they did it in such a way that I want to emulate, even if they don't decide to do exactly what we do, but they get to see it. That, to me, means a lot.”
But owning a business, whether separate or together, comes with a lot of responsibility and mistakes can often happen, especially for novice entrepreneurs. Egypt opens up about mistakes her and Mike experienced working in real estate.
“On our journey of entrepreneurship, we made a lot of mistakes. We spent money, we did things backwards, we learned the hard way through the school of hard knocks. There was no road map for us,” she says.
“So our goal by partnering with TurboTax is to really open the eyes of fellow entrepreneurs, to show them that, especially when it comes to your finances, your taxes, and getting that right, there is a faster, more cost effective, more accurate way of getting the support that you need.”
“On our journey of entrepreneurship, we made a lot of mistakes. We spent money, we did things backwards, we learned the hard way through the school of hard knocks. There was no road map for us."
Being tax compliant is among small business owners’ top concerns, but it's often time-consuming and research-intensive to figure out taxes on your own. TurboTax Business provides small business owners and solopreneurs access to unlimited live expert help to get your taxes prepared and filed.
When it comes to their marriage, the money conversation never goes away. The couple owns six businesses together, multiple properties, and are parents to three daughters. So when it comes down to finances, they believe in transparency, even dating back to their first date 21 years ago.
“Our first conversation about money was that, ‘hey, I don't have no money.’ Okay?,” Mike says. “Because there's been past relationships that are no longer existing. There's been things going on that I had to take care of and get through. So you're meeting a man that is pretty much starting from scratch again. How do you feel about it?”
At the time, Mike was newly divorced and had a small child. Egypt says she found his honesty “refreshing” and was looking for someone to build with, so his finances weren’t a problem for her. “If you're building anything, and that's like, first, second, third date, and you feel like, okay, this is someone I can be invested with, even beyond money, you have to just be honest about your circumstances,” Egypt shares.
“Our first conversation about money was that, ‘hey, I don't have no money.’ Okay?. Because there's been past relationships that are no longer existing. There's been things going on that I had to take care of and get through. So you're meeting a man that is pretty much starting from scratch again. How do you feel about it?”
“Otherwise you're building a house of cards that can fall at any minute, but I think money is one of the things. Finances are one of the things that even when people are in love, they still can't make it work and it breaks up marriages. It breaks up relationships because it's a stressor.
“So, yeah it is something that you want to ask about up front. What's your credit? How much do you earn? You don't have to be rich, but I just need to know if if the math is mathing.”
While they don’t believe you should have the money conversation on the first date, they do believe you should have it early to avoid any misunderstandings down the line.
To hear more about their story, check out their podcast, Marriage and Money and watch the new season of Married to Real Estate on HGTV.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
“So they get to grow up and experience what it is to be entrepreneurs from ground level, right? Because Mom and Dad did it, and they did it in such a way that I want to emulate, even if they don't decide to do exactly what we do, but they get to see it. That, to me, means a lot.”
But owning a business, whether separate or together, comes with a lot of responsibility and mistakes can often happen, especially for novice entrepreneurs. Egypt opens up about mistakes her and Mike experienced working in real estate.
“On our journey of entrepreneurship, we made a lot of mistakes. We spent money, we did things backwards, we learned the hard way through the school of hard knocks. There was no road map for us,” she says.
“So our goal by partnering with TurboTax is to really open the eyes of fellow entrepreneurs, to show them that, especially when it comes to your finances, your taxes, and getting that right, there is a faster, more cost effective, more accurate way of getting the support that you need.”
“On our journey of entrepreneurship, we made a lot of mistakes. We spent money, we did things backwards, we learned the hard way through the school of hard knocks. There was no road map for us."
Being tax compliant is among small business owners’ top concerns, but it's often time-consuming and research-intensive to figure out taxes on your own. TurboTax Business provides small business owners and solopreneurs access to unlimited live expert help to get your taxes prepared and filed.
When it comes to their marriage, the money conversation never goes away. The couple owns six businesses together, multiple properties, and are parents to three daughters. So when it comes down to finances, they believe in transparency, even dating back to their first date 21 years ago.
“Our first conversation about money was that, ‘hey, I don't have no money.’ Okay?,” Mike says. “Because there's been past relationships that are no longer existing. There's been things going on that I had to take care of and get through. So you're meeting a man that is pretty much starting from scratch again. How do you feel about it?”
At the time, Mike was newly divorced and had a small child. Egypt says she found his honesty “refreshing” and was looking for someone to build with, so his finances weren’t a problem for her. “If you're building anything, and that's like, first, second, third date, and you feel like, okay, this is someone I can be invested with, even beyond money, you have to just be honest about your circumstances,” Egypt shares.
“Our first conversation about money was that, ‘hey, I don't have no money.’ Okay?. Because there's been past relationships that are no longer existing. There's been things going on that I had to take care of and get through. So you're meeting a man that is pretty much starting from scratch again. How do you feel about it?”
“Otherwise you're building a house of cards that can fall at any minute, but I think money is one of the things. Finances are one of the things that even when people are in love, they still can't make it work and it breaks up marriages. It breaks up relationships because it's a stressor.
“So, yeah it is something that you want to ask about up front. What's your credit? How much do you earn? You don't have to be rich, but I just need to know if if the math is mathing.”
While they don’t believe you should have the money conversation on the first date, they do believe you should have it early to avoid any misunderstandings down the line.
To hear more about their story, check out their podcast, Marriage and Money and watch the new season of Married to Real Estate on HGTV.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
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