These Black Girl Bosses Are Breaking The Mold In The Tech Industry One Code At A Time
The tech industry is more than just men in hoodies glued to their desks in Silicon Valley. There are also beautiful Black women cracking the code every single day - and slaying while doing it. Each of the Black women included in the list below has created an app, a platform, or a community based upon a need that they've identified or a hole that they sought to fill with their relatability and brilliance. From food and science to self-love and mental health, Black women in tech are setting positive examples in the STEM field that encourage the confidence of other tech entrepreneurs on the rise.
xoNecole had a chance to speak with these leading Black girl bosses who are sprinkling their #BlackGirlMagic all over the tech industry. Here's what they had to say about their online communities and the importance of diversity and representation in the world of technology.
Carina Glover, CEO of HerHeadquarters
Courtesy of Carina Glover
The platform she created: "HerHeadquarters is a brand partnership platform exclusive to women entrepreneurs. Female founders and entrepreneurs all over the country use HerHeadquarters to quickly secure valuable brand partnerships with other women-owned brands. The platform currently houses 400+ women-owned brands from the fashion, beauty, entertainment, events, and PR industries."
The importance of Black women in tech: "We are the key to creating the products that will positively impact the lives of Black people and women. Until we create the solution, we (and everyone else who falls within the demographic) will continue to live in the problem. Our experiences, perspectives, and culture are unlike those who currently dominate the tech world. They can't develop products that solve problems they've never experienced because they can't relate, therefore they don't see the need for the products. Black women in tech are not a luxury, we're a necessity."
Advice for budding tech entreprenueHERs: "Don't be afraid to take up space. You don't have to be an expert in every area, but learn as much as you can, even outside of your area of focus. Find someone that can mentor you, someone who sees your potential and wants to help water the seed in you."
"Don't be afraid to take up space. You don't have to be an expert in every area, but learn as much as you can, even outside of your area of focus. Find someone that can mentor you, someone who sees your potential and wants to help water the seed in you."
Riana Lynn, Founder of Journey Foods
Courtesy of Riana Lynn
The platform she created: "Journey Foods solves food science and supply chain inefficiencies with software in order to help companies feed eight billion people better. [We do this through] technology that improves product management and development for CPG companies, ingredient suppliers, and manufacturers. In addition to helping food manufacturers create better products, we also use the power of our data to create experimental snacks that help us test our AI called Journey Bites. They're nutrient-dense, micro foods that we release for sale online and Amazon."
The inspiration behind her platform: "Globally, consumers spend three trillion [dollars] on packaged foods every year. This number is set to eclipse jump from 700-900 billion in the US by the end of the year. These products, packaged and manufactured foods, account for over 70 percent of our daily caloric intake. At the same time, there's clear evidence that much of the food we eat is related to the increase in chronic diseases - cancer, diabetes, and poor mental health."
The importance of Black women in tech: "As a Black woman, I want to continue to solve problems for myself, family, friends, and communities across the globe. Even though Black women are one of the fastest growing sectors in entrepreneurship, it is a challenging road for the most impactful industries in the world which happen to be dominated by old heads: agriculture and tech. I want to continue to break through on growth, servant leadership, and impact that will help inspire the next crop of Black women that can solve the world's greatest challenges."
Joy Ofodu, Coordinator of #ShareBlackStories
Courtesy of Joy Ofodu
The community for which she leads the brand effort: "#ShareBlackStories, Instagram's first multi-channel program, call to action, and campaign to support and inspire our Black community. Since launching in the U.S. in Feb 2019, #ShareBlackStories has also taken root in the U.K. and Brazil."
The inspiration behind her community: "The U.S. Black community is so active and vibrant on Instagram. We share a sense of pride, perseverance and promote a shared cultural identity that is emulated by so many others. In February 2019, our Black employees were inspired by this and knew it was important to create a space within the app for Black people to fearlessly express themselves. I helped to create a unifying brand identity across our existing efforts, brainstorm new applications, and stepped up to coordinate the efforts of over 11 teams including Editorial, Product, Partnerships, Design and Policy. Since 2019, we've partnered with hundreds of creators, businesses, and public figures to bring #ShareBlackStories to life online and in-person, including Jackie Aina, Jidenna, Ruth Carter, Overbrook Productions, and Afropunk."
The importance of Black women in tech: "When people envision a tech wiz or hacker, they envision a white man from the Silicon Valley. They forget that Black women are expert hackers by nature, some of the most creative problem solvers. Even though Black women make up less than 5% of most major tech company workforces, we play such vital roles in these organizations, both in STEM roles and non-STEM roles, serving as inspiration to other girls. Our presence helps to validate that yes, we are brilliant and deserving of the opportunity to serve a global user base. Sometimes we can't be what we can't see. Finally, when we are represented at the table, we can help make our companies more empathetic to and supportive of Black users."
"Our presence helps to validate that yes, we are brilliant and deserving of the opportunity to serve a global user base. Sometimes we can't be what we can't see. Finally, when we are represented at the table, we can help make our companies more empathetic to and supportive of Black users."
OlanikeeOsi, CEO/Founder of SelfishBabe
Courtesy of OlanikeeOsi
The app she created: "The SelfishBabe App is my self-love app that sends women a daily affirmation and self-love reminder. SelfishBabe is about women selfishly and authentically loving themselves. Choosing themselves and creating a life they enjoy. It puts self-love at the forefront, really themselves, when usually many women would put themselves at the backseat and put others first."
The inspiration behind her app: "I wanted there to be one place where you could have personal development. A few years back I was big into personal development, learning about spirituality, the law of attraction, crystals, and the power of our words. I had already seen and been inspired by BossBabe and ManifestationBabe. I wanted to change the way we viewed the word selfish. When one thinks of being selfish they usually think about someone who is mean and greedy. With SelfishBabe I just want women to think about them putting themselves first because honestly when it comes to self-love, you are placing yourself first and you're not thinking of anyone else but you, so it is SELFISH but not in the negative way people usually think about it. Being selfish actually helps humanity. Imagine if more women were selfish with themselves where the world would be right now."
Advice for budding tech entreprenueHERs: "My advice would be to be patient, have your vision of what you want your tech to do, how you want it to impact the world, and have a way that it will make money eventually. Have patience because at least in my experience, tech is a long-haul thing. You have to build up visibility about what you have and why it's important and you probably spend a good penny on developing it, without immediate return. This can be frustrating if you don't know this in the beginning and may make you want to quit. Don't quit if you really have the vision for it."
Amanda Spann, Founder of The App Accelerator
Courtesy of Amanda Spann
The community she created: "The App Accelerator is an online program and community that provides a framework for non-technical and aspiring entrepreneurs to build their first app. We pair our robust curriculum with group and 1:1 coaching and add an additional layer of support with our resource repository to provide you with every asset you need to make your app business a reality."
The inspiration behind her community: "Creating my first app was a long, hard, and lonely process. I blew thousands of dollars and wasted countless hours aimlessly trying to navigate the path from idea to app. Building any product is difficult, but it can be a particularly challenging task when you're non-technical. It can feel like a never-ending trail of Google searches, technical jargon, and a good ol' boys club that you don't necessarily have a membership to. As I was building and some of my apps rose in popularity, I started to receive hundreds of emails from nearly every continent from people who had similar stories, 'Amanda, I have an app idea but I don't know where to start.'
"The App Accelerator was my own 'reply-all' of sorts to each and every one of those messages. I wanted to let people know that everyone has to start somewhere and it's OK to not know what you don't know. Your ideas still hold value and you are capable of building them from anywhere, at nearly any budget. The App Accelerator is my roadmap for making your app ideas happen."
Advice for budding tech entreprenueHERs: "If nothing else, have the audacity to continually show up for yourself, even on the days you don't feel capable, confident or worthy. Give yourself the patience to make mistakes and the grace to keep going."
"If nothing else, have the audacity to continually show up for yourself, even on the days you don't feel capable, confident or worthy. Give yourself the patience to make mistakes and the grace to keep going."
Quincy K. Brown, Ph. D., Co-Founder of blackcomputeHER
Courtesy of Quincy K. Brown, Ph. D.
The inspiration behind her community: "blackcomputHER.org was born out of the lived experiences of the three co-founders. We each have PhDs in Computer Science and met as graduate students. Throughout our years in graduate school and early in our post-PhD careers, we would see each other at conferences and remark about the small number of Black women with visible roles, e.g. presenters, keynote speakers, committee chairs, etc., in the community. We would often have these conversations at night after the day's conference programming ended.
These became known as the 'Conference after the Conference'. At some point, we realized that our community was dope enough such that for us, the 'Conference after the Conference' really was the conference that we all needed to sustain ourselves, to learn and grow from our experiences, and to be the support for each other that we need.
"We started the conference as a means of organizing the community of Black women in computing and tech by developing an agenda that we can implement and scale. We created the annual #blackcomputeHER conference to be a safe space for us to gather. A time when we can be ourselves, turn off our guards, and have the frank conversations that we know we need. The conference is a gathering for us, not about us, and a time unlike any other when we can speak about our technical expertise and the other topics of importance to us. The organization grew out of this effort as a structure to enable us to do the work."
The importance of Black women in tech: "Representation matters because we matter. Black women in the computing [and] tech world matter. We contribute, we innovate, we create, and we lead at every level. The research literature about Black women and girls in computing [and] tech is scant. The narrative about Black women in tech, who we are, where we come from, what our interests are, what works for us, etc. has not been created by us.
The representation of Black women that is based on 'our' truth is important because it allows us to be free of other people's perceptions of what we can or cannot, should or should not, do or be. The freedom of 'dropping the mask' and just being who we are is not afforded to us, generally, and even less so in tech. Having visible representation that highlights the breadth and depth of who we are and our accomplishments allows us to see ourselves in the space that we have contributed to and created."
Davinia Tomlinson, Founder of rainchq
Photo Credit: Simeon Thaw
Courtesy of Davinia Tomlinson
The platform she created: "rainchq is a membership platform created to help women take control of their financial futures. 'Rainmakers' gain access to financial education, qualified and regulated financial advice from female financial advisers and events focused on all aspects of holistic well-being – all delivered digitally."
The inspiration behind her platform: "As someone who has spent my entire career in the world of investment management, it was obvious that women are chronically underrepresented, not just in terms of visibility in senior leadership roles within the industry, but also in terms of the client base. There are a number of different financial challenges women face which have become more prominent in recent years, from the gender pay gap to the gender investing gap, all of which have the potential to cripple us in later life.
rainchq was set up to provide practical solutions to help address this gloomy picture through education, advice, and online community in a mutually supportive and ultimately enriching environment. My ambition is to build a global community of rainmakers who are smashing it, not just professionally but financially too."
The importance of Black women in tech: "I live by the mantra 'if you can't see it, you can't be it', which has become even more important to me as a mother of two young daughters. Black women are trailblazers in whichever field we choose to pursue, however the importance of role models in helping us recognize our capabilities and importantly see what the possibilities are for women who look like us is invaluable."
"Black women are trailblazers in whichever field we choose to pursue, however the importance of role models in helping us recognize our capabilities and importantly see what the possibilities are for women who look like us is invaluable."
Nichelle McCall Browne, Co-Founder of Bramework
Courtesy of Nichelle McCall Browne
The platform she created: "Bramework is my second tech Startup. I started BOLD Guidance in 2013 to help students apply to college and raised $1/2 million in a year as a non-technical founder (putting me in the .02% of Black women to raise venture capital for a tech company). Now I'm working on my second startup, Bramework, helping small businesses create high-quality blog posts in minutes. Bramework is a marketing department in your pocket.
Helping small businesses that can't afford to hire a specialized team produce blog content regularly so their customers can find them online. When you produce quality content regularly on your website, Google starts to index more pages, which can help you rank higher in search engines. We've found that digital marketing strategists and entrepreneurs love Bramework because they can produce more quality content faster, especially in this current COVID-19 environment where more businesses need to be found online but have limited resources."
The importance of Black women in tech: "Black women bring their own experiences and perspectives, so we see problems, opportunities, and solutions differently. We tap into markets that may be a barrier of entry for others because they don't understand the nuisances of the customer's problems, needs, or how to connect with them. If it wasn't for Black women, there would be no Miss Jessie's, Carol's Daughter, or NaturAll Club. If it wasn't for Black women in tech, there would be no digitalundivided, Blavity, or Travel Noire.
Exposure lets other women see what's possible for them, while being a voice at the table opens up the way for more Black women. It's like when Kimberly Bryant created Black Girls CODE – once women and girls started to see people who look like them and had someone open the doors to opportunities in tech, we saw a huge increase of Black girls being interested in tech. We must continue to open the doors and support each other along the way. We do better when we come up together."
Advice for budding tech entreprenueHERs: "When building your tech company, focus on finding your right paying customer and generating revenue. This is the number one thing I teach entrepreneurs in my courses. Make sure all your milestones and activities point to revenue-generating goals. Don't put too much focus on raising money and what the stats say about Black women raising venture capital. When your number one concern is creating a product that solves your customer's biggest challenge, it's easier to sell it and the money will come. It's always easier to raise money when you have money. But even if it takes longer to raise money, your business is OK because you're making the money that can help you to grow. Plus, you give up less equity when your company is making more."
Featured image courtesy of Joy Ofodu
- This Woman Is Using Tech To Help Families In Need Get Food ... ›
- Amanda Spann Wants More Black Women In The Tech Industry ... ›
- Best Investment Apps 2021 - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
- Get Your Mind Right With These Mental Health Apps For Black People - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
'We Had To Heal To Love': Taja Simpson And Ryan Easter’s Journey To Lasting Love
How We Met is a series where xoNecole talks love and relationships with real-life couples. We learn how they met, how like turned into love, and how they make their love work.
One of my favorite things about interviewing married couples and hearing their diverse “How We Met” stories is the way they affirm true love and integral beliefs. One principle that I wholeheartedly believe is that one must truly know and love oneself before effectively doing it for another human being, and Taja Simpson and Ryan Easter’s story affirms this.
Taja, an actress known most for her role on BET’s The Oval, and businessman/model Ryan Easter tied the knot on July 27 in an intimate and beautiful wedding in LA - surrounded by friends and family. During our 40+ minute conversation, the newlyweds opened up about the inner work journey they both went through individually to become their best selves.
Taja revealed that her grateful and light spirit came after being in a depressive state and doing a great deal of healing and education. And Ryan shared how losing a parent as a youth affected how he showed up in the world and the truths he had to face to embrace who he is wholly.
The pair also chatted about the power of intention, the importance of working through trauma, and the work they do every day to honor their partnership. There’s a reason their glow is so beautiful! It comes from the inside.
“You're meeting me now after I've done all this work, but I had to go through it to get to that space and be in a very happy, healed relationship,” Taja says. Check out the layered conversation below.
xoNecole: I’ll start with the most obvious question: how did you two meet, and what were your initial feelings about each other?
Ryan Easter: We connected through friends. At the time, I was in New York, and she was back and forth between LA and Atlanta. But our mutual female friends were together and decided they needed to set me up. So they confirmed I was looking for something serious and then sent me her picture.
And I was like, "Okay, she looks good - a chocolate drop." But then I thought, "What's wrong with her? So, I called them up, and one of them was messing with me and said, "Oh, she's a little crazy." I was like, "Whoa, I can't do crazy anymore. I've dealt with that before. I’d rather stay by myself than deal with that again." Then she clarified, "No, I'm just kidding. She's crazy in a good way. She's a lot of fun and has her stuff together. That’s how it started for me.
Taja Simpson: I was just going about my life, getting ready for another season of The Oval, when I got a text from my friend Natasha. She said, "Hey, I don't think you're dating anybody, but I have a friend I think you should meet. He's a great guy." She gave me this huge pedigree, saying they had been friends for 19 years. I thought, "Wow, he sounds amazing." But when she sent me a photo, I didn’t like it.
Later, I thought about it and figured it could just not be a good picture. So she sent his Instagram which had all these modeling fitness pictures and stuff. And then I was like, wow - you had my whole husband this time and didn’t tell me - now I told her she could give him my number.
"I was just going about my life, getting ready for another season of The Oval, when I got a text from my friend Natasha. She said, "Hey, I don't think you're dating anybody, but I have a friend I think you should meet. He's a great guy." She gave me this huge pedigree, saying they had been friends for 19 years. I thought, "Wow, he sounds amazing." But when she sent me a photo, I didn’t like it."
Taja Simpson & Ryan Easter
Photo by @jorgemezaphotos
xoN: I love that because, you know, there's all these conversations about the ways people meet, and I still feel like friends and family are one of the best ways. It’s like they know you! What are your thoughts?
Ryan: Yeah, absolutely! You feel a great sense of obligation to be the best version of yourself because you’re not just representing yourself; you’re also representing the person who referred you. I can’t go out there acting like a fool and have them looking at their friend like, "Why did you hook me up with this clown?" It’s like, we're gonna be clear and honest about our intentions. And if it works, great, and if it doesn't, it's okay.
Taja: Exactly. When he called, we spoke that day for like, an hour. The rest was history. We just connected, and it was great. After that, we started talking every day, and now here we are.
xoN: Okay, so tell me about your first date! Do you remember where you went? What did you do? How was the vibe?
Taja: Our first in-person date was two months after we met over the phone. This was during COVID, so we got introduced in July 2020 but didn’t meet until September. From July to September, we were doing video dates and phone calls, building up this excitement about meeting in person. I was really nervous. I thought, "Oh my God, is it going to be like it was over the phone?" We really connected and vibed. I was there to pick him up at LAX, and I felt like this was it. I thought, "God put this brother in my life to be this good, this perfect." It felt too good to be true.
I actually had a friend meet us at the airport to film our meeting without him knowing. I told her to stay in the corner and keep the camera hidden. When he was coming down the escalator, I had this whole plan to run up to him in slow motion and jump into his arms. When I saw him, I froze. I was so nervous that I couldn’t move! He came up to me, gave me a big hug, and swung me around, and I just thought, "Wow!" Everything I planned went out the window.
Ryan: I was really excited to meet her, too. Technically, our first date was at Firestone Brewery. After the airport, we went back to her place to drop off my stuff, and then she said, "I like to drink beer," so she took me to a brewery nearby.
I remember being there, and we were kind of embracing, but not too much since it was technically the first time we were in physical proximity. You still have to play it cool, even after talking for a while. But every time I touched her, it felt good. I thought, "Yeah, this is it." When we hugged at the airport, I felt like, "Yo, this is home." At that moment, I knew she was the one.
xoN: Ugh, I love that. So when did the courtship start to develop into a relationship? Did y'all have that conversation?
Ryan: Initially, we were very clear about our intentions. We were both dating with purpose and had similar aspirations of eventually finding someone to marry, start a family, create businesses together, and live our lives to the fullest. We knew from the beginning that this was our goal and checked in with each other to see if we were on the same page.
After establishing our intentions, it was about having those small conversations. We discussed what was important to each of us—our needs, wants, likes, dislikes, triggers, and traumas. All those details are crucial for building a solid foundation for a healthy relationship. We spent a lot of time getting to know the real person, not just the representative we might present to the world.
Sometimes, it’s difficult because it requires us to be extremely vulnerable. For men, especially in our society, vulnerability is often frowned upon, making it hard to expose that sensitive side. You never know how people will react—some might use it against you, while others might protect you.
I think for her; it took her understanding that mentality that men have and use that to her advantage to make sure she's like, look, this is a safe space for you to allow me to see the full person that you are. I appreciated that because, like, I would tell her, if you really want a man to value you, he has to feel safe with you, right, not necessarily in a physical capacity but more so from an emotional standpoint; I need to feel like I can be safe with you emotionally.
So that courtship was a lot of just having those serious, sometimes difficult conversations about things we're going through in the past to things we aspire to accomplish in the future, to things that we're currently dealing with, and started to gain that understanding about who we are and what we aspire to be, and just continue to flow.
"So that courtship was a lot of just having those serious, sometimes difficult conversations about things we're going through in the past to things we aspire to accomplish in the future, to things that we're currently dealing with, and started to gain that understanding about who we are and what we aspire to be, and just continue to flow."
Taja: I mean, that's exactly right, and a lot of it we spoke about even before we met. Because it was this free thing where we didn’t know each other. We didn't have to be a representative. I was just my authentic self. It’s like - I'm an actor, and I got five or six characters that may come out in our conversation. I'll be funny, then the next moment, I'll be serious. It just happens.
I was very vocal about how I foresee my life going. Also, because I'm in entertainment, that played a part. I had met people before who couldn't handle that. They wanted a woman with a nine-to-five, a teacher, or just somebody with a very strict schedule. But that wasn't me. So I think we were super intentional when it came to dating and making sure we can build and grow together. So, we made that commitment prior to him leaving. He came to LA for a week, and the day before he left, it was like, okay, so this is it.
xoN: I’ve noticed that intention and vulnerability are both powerful words that you two keep using, which I think is essential for any long-term relationship. What are some of your other shared values?
Ryan: Also, we both understood the power of mindset. When you see successful or unsuccessful people, sometimes others will attribute their state to their family or money. And I'm not saying that that doesn't help. But there are a lot of people who have come from very humble beginnings and very troubled past that have gone on to do great things, and it all had to do with their mindset. They had to leave and see themselves doing what they desired to do before it became a reality in the physical realm.
I think a lot of those beliefs and mentalities that we shared was refreshing because, you know, we've all known people that every time you talk to them, something bad is going on. And it's such a drag because they can bring your energy down. We don't subscribe to that. Not saying that we don't go through tough times. But when we do, the question that we always ask ourselves is, what is it that I'm supposed to learn from this? I think those type of elements of just being in alignment mentally about how we view the world definitely help to solidify our relationship and our connection.
Taja: When we met, I was in a headspace of growth. We now call it believe, evolve, become because you have to believe that thing right in order to show up. We both understand that your vibration precedes your manifestation, so you have to vibrate and believe at a certain level. Act as if you have to be in that space, that energy, in order for that thing to come so you can evolve and then become whatever that said thing is. But I was in that headspace before we met, and I was clearing out people in my life.
I was really intentional with finding someone that was in that headspace, too. I was not okay with anyone being stagnant.
Taja Simpson & Ryan Easter
Photo by @jorgemezaphotos
xoN: You two seem so evolved individually and collectively. I'm curious, were there any challenges that you two had to get through together, and what did you learn from that experience?
Ryan: Being parents. And if your partner doesn't have a great pregnancy, then it can be tough, and it stretches you in a lot of ways. But I would definitely say the first five months of being new parents was a lot because we were both exhausted. And she's also trying to heal her body because giving birth puts a tremendous amount of stress on the woman's body. It gives you a different respect for the strength of femininity because I wouldn't want to go through that. And I was there the whole 29 hours.
So during that time I'm getting snappy because I need to rest. I have not been able to rest, and I'm sleep-deprived, and I don't feel like I got my foot in yet. And, and then, on top of that, you have this, this really small human that's completely dependent upon you. They can't do anything for himself, and that, even psychologically, that's a lot to carry. But the thing that I think that has helped us is that we understand that we won't always be on the same page. It's okay to have disagreements, but you always have to lead with love, meaning that if I'm upset with her or she's upset with me, we focus on what the issue is.
Taja: I had a horrible pregnancy and was still feeling like I want to be productive; it’s just part of who I am. And during the newborn phase, like he said, we were exhausted. We were zombies. I'm getting whiny. I need sleep. He's getting snappy and short, and we're having to figure out us. The hardest thing is trying to still learn how to effectively communicate in the midst of this space where you are exhausted; you don't feel good, nothing's going your way.
But I'm a big believer of being accountable, especially for women, because women are not always accountable. But we encourage each other to address the trauma and encourage positive self-thought and talk. Because what you think, speak, and do creates power for better and worse.
xoN: Were there any past traumas you had to heal from in order to love each other correctly, and do you feel comfortable discussing them?
Ryan: For me, the biggest thing was my father’s death at nine. You’re young, and you don’t know how to process the loss. It’s one of those things I thought I dealt with, but when I got into my adult years, I realized it didn’t. I always felt like I had to go above and beyond because I didn’t have my father there to be a man - I excelled in sports and academics, but it was based on an inadequate feeling.
I understand the importance of fathers in children’s life but you still have the power to be the best version of yourself whether your father is there or not. And I believe the almighty Creator will put people in your life to be the best version of yourself. I wanted to be that confident person for her and our children - and I didn’t want to carry that trauma into our relationship or our son. So I worked on it before us and I continue to now.
Taja: Mine was colorism. I grew up where the brown paper bag thing was a thing. There were kids I couldn’t play with because “I was too Black.” I had a family member who called me “Ew.” Like she’d literally say, come here, Ew, you ugly thing. And my family, for a long time, didn’t realize how it was breaking me. But eventually, my mom noticed and taught me more about self-esteem and then I started to do the work. But it still shows its head. I still would have thoughts that I’m not good enough because of how I look. I’ve literally not tried out for roles because of that. One of my friends’ friends has literally called out once that I was the only dark person at an event.
So when I started doing the work, I noticed the ways it showed up, like I just wouldn’t want to be in the sun long. I mean when I was younger, I used to pray to God to make me “better” or lighter. It took a long time to really get over that. There’s a book I wrote called Women Who Shine - where I got my thoughts out about this.
So he knows my sensitive spots and speaks to the little girl in me. It's so interesting how the things we go through when we’re young affect us in adulthood. Mental health is as important as physical health - and I’m grateful that he understands the importance of both of those.
xoN: Thank you for your vulnerability. I hope it helps someone else. Finally, I’ll close with this: what’s your favorite thing about each other?
Ryan: Definitely her mindset. She doesn’t have a victim mindset; she’s empowered. That’s so attractive. I believe that she prides herself on being a good, great communicator. She moves with integrity, you know, I think that's important. And you know, she also understands the importance of taking care of her physical, emotional, and mental wellbeing.
Taja: There’s so many. Where do I start? My husband is supremely supportive. I absolutely love that about him. Also, I love his intention. I love how effectively he communicates. I love how he fathers our child. I love how he looks. Because, praise God. Okay, I'm just gonna put that out there.
But you know what, my favorite thing about him is that I love that he's a man of integrity.
Integrity was the highest things on my list when I’d write out what I wanted in a partner. Because it’s everything. And so I love that I feel the level of safety that I feel with him, that I can completely be my 100% authentic self. I know that he's taking care of me, my heart, and our family. We're good.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image by @jorgemezaphotos
'Tis The Season To Stream Black: 15 New Holiday Movies For The Culture
It’s beginning to look a lot like - Black Christmas or whatever Michael Bublé said. As we countdown to Christmas and fully immerse ourselves into the holiday season, we’re overjoyed how, each year, the inclusivity of holiday movies grows. From BET+, OWN, Hallmark, and Lifetime, we’ve got you covered with over 15 Black holiday movies. So grab your favorite holiday snack, put your pajamas on, and get to streaming!
Scouting For Christmas (Hallmark)
Screenshot/ Scouting For Christmas
Angela has been a busy realtor since her amicable divorce a couple of years ago. Now, she is a devoted, if often harried, single mom to a smart and loving 10-year-old girl, Brooklyn. When Brooklyn gets the idea to have William (Marks), the owner of her favorite bakery, cater her scout troop’s posh annual holiday event, she asks Angela to work with him on pitching the idea to the moms in charge. Despite sensing that her daughter might be trying to play cupid, she agrees to help and finds herself enjoying time with him, but is reluctant to open her heart and life to someone new. When Dakota returns, missing her, Angela must decide what is best for her daughter and best for her heart.
Air Date: October 20th
Meet Me Next Christmas (Netflix)
Screenshot/ Meet Me Next Christmas
Christina Milian, Devale Ellis, AND Kofi Siriboe in one holiday film? Sign me up! On a quest to meet the man of her dreams, a hopeless romantic races across New York City to find a ticket to a sold-out Pentatonix Christmas concert.
Air Date: November 6th
A Season to Remember (OWN)
Meet Me Next Christmas/ A Season to Remember
Symone Gibson is a sports reporter in Detroit who's trying to find a story that will take her career to the next level. With the help of a new cameraman, Iggy, she chases down a story and finds romance, courage, and a new sense of direction.
Air Date: November 7th
A Christmas Miracle (BET+)
Screenshot/ A Christmas Miracle
When the Christmas Jubilee at the local community center is in danger of losing funding, the family must band together to make sure everyone, including the kids, have a Merry Christmas.
Air Date: Nov 7th
Style Me For Christmas (BET+)
Screenshot/ Style Me For Christmas
Anything involving Mario’s sexiness and the sound of his sultry voice is a win for me. A boutique owner facing eviction at Christmas gets the fashion assignment of a lifetime when she’s chosen to style a handsome celebrity who’s also a playboy.
Air Date: Nov 14th
Mistletoe & Matrimony (OWN)
Screenshot/ Mistletoe & Matrimony
Olivia Morris (Ashlei Sharpe) is a successful wedding planner who plays it safe in life and love. She is forced to reckon with her timid tendencies when she’s unwillingly tasked with planning her vivacious younger sister’s Christmas Eve wedding. Things get even more complicated when Olivia’s ex-boyfriend, Isaiah (Etienne Maurice), returns from overseas to help with the wedding. When sparks fly with her former flame amidst unfolding family drama, Olivia contemplates if she is finally ready to live life on her own terms this holiday season.
Air Date: November 14th
A Wesley South African Christmas
Screenshot/ A Wesley South African Christmas
When his international business venture comes to a screeching halt, Todd must stick around Durban, South Africa, during the Christmas holiday to close the deal, but not without the Wesley family and all their holiday shenanigans.
Air Date: Nov 21st
The Day Before Christmas (BET+)
Screenshot/ The Day Before Christmas
When two single parents accidentally swap phones and their children’s backpacks on a hectic Christmas Eve, they find themselves covering for each other in a series of chaotic yet heartwarming events, leading to unexpected romance.
Air Date: Nov 28th
Make or Bake Christmas (Lifetime)
Screenshot/ Make or Bake Christmas
With Christmas fast approaching, Leslie, known for her expertise in all things domestic and top lifestyle brands, is looking to expand her business. She sets her sights on the bakery, Sugar Bakers, owned by Denise Sugarbaker and run by her son, David. Determined to make a deal before the end of the year, Leslie sends one of her top employees, Emma, to go undercover as a seasonal employee in order to convince them to sell. Emma unexpectedly finds herself falling in love with the quaint bakery with its Christmas spirit, staff and especially, David.
Air Date: December 1st
Brewster’s Millions: Christmas (BET +)
Screenshot/ Brewster’s Millions: Christmas
When Monica Brewster, a wealthy heiress who has lost her way, faces a Christmas challenge to inherit her uncle Monty Brewster’s grandfather’s fortune, she must learn the true meaning of love, faith, and family by giving instead of receiving, all while navigating the charming chaos, and the true meaning of the holiday season.
Air Date: December 5th
A Very Merry Beauty Salon (Lifetime)
Screenshot/ A Very Merry Beauty Salon
Sienna is preparing for Atlanta's Tinsel Ball, where she will be honored for her charitable work. The annual event takes a glamorous turn with the arrival of Lawrence, whose family's wine brand is now co-sponsoring the Ball.
Air Date: December 7th
Too Many Christmases (BET+)
Screenshot/ Too Many Christmases
Jerome and Kayla are excited to spend their first Christmas together as husband and wife. The only problem is that they’ve never celebrated Christmas without their respective families. This Christmas, instead of deciding on one event, they agree to attend two at the same time to appease their families.
Air Date: December 12th
Queens of Christmas (BET+)
Screenshot/ Queens of Christmas
Doris and Julia, life-long friends and feuding neighbors, learn the true meaning of ‘sisterhood’ and Christmas while hilariously competing for the annual title of ‘Queen of Christmas.'
Air Date: December 19th
24-Karat Christmas (OWN)
Screenshot/ 24-Karat Christmas
When Trish (Samantha Marie Ware), an unlucky-in-love jewelry designer, accidentally sends a set of Christmas wedding bands off with the wrong person, she and the charming best man, Book Mosely (Curtis Hamilton), must work together to track them down and get them to the wedding on Christmas Eve – in the process learning that you can’t wait for love to find you, you have to go out and find it.
Air Date: December 21st
Blended Christmas
Screenshot/ Blended Christmas
After a freak accident, a new bride cancels her tropical Christmas honeymoon to take care of her husband’s ex-wife and kids with a little help from a holiday angel.
Air Date: December 25th
Have you seen any of these films yet? Sound off in the comments, and don’t forget to stream and support each and every one of these films and the actors who made the characters come to life. Happy Holidays xoFAM!
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image screenshot/ A Very Merry Christmas