Being single isn’t so luxurious when life be lifing, especially, when you’re the sole person responsible for all your bills and general upkeep of your everyday life. I’m sure I can speak for most single women when I say that the constant of having to take care of every detail of your life, paired with working, is taxing. We’re just girls!
I, for a long time, thought that being girly was the equivalent to living luxuriously, which is still true in some cases. However, for years, I struggled to relate to that concept because I had a hard time connecting to my girly side. I was just too mentally drained from having to think about and fulfill my ‘daily’ responsibilities, solo. So, I had to redefine what luxury means to me, and what it means at this current point of my life is freeing my mind from clutter, allowing me to simply be.
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To get started on my journey, I started at the bottom and began to ask myself some honest questions like: What can I do to alleviate some of the day-to-day tasks? What areas in my life do I need additional assistance in? What should I start or stop doing that can help me clear my mind from clutter, giving me more time to relax?
In no particular order, here’s what I came up with!
Tip 1: Compartmentalize
Identify the areas in your life that require the most time out of your day, cause the most stress, and, of course, affect your funds the most. Once you have a handle on that, then you need to start thinking about the next most important step. What requires more money vs. what requires more labor and go from there.
Tip 2: Outsourcing
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We know that you’re a strong, independent woman who can do it all…but is that the life you want to continue living? For example, put down the broom, pick up the phone, and hire a house cleaning service if cleaning your home takes too much of your time. If you can’t afford a housekeeping service, then space out your chores. You don’t have to clean your home all in one day.
Tip 3: Maintain car maintenance checks
Girls, we must remember that our cars are just as important as our homes and bodies and require its own maintenance. We can’t ignore the check engine light forever. Little do you know, the very knowledge of knowing that your cars’ needs are being neglected is causing subliminal stress because it will always reside in your mind. Just take it a day at a time. Set aside one day to clean your car and set aside another day to make those big girl phone calls to schedule a maintenance appointment.
Tip 4: Meal planning
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If you’re not comfortable in the kitchen, then that means you’re probably ordering in or going out to eat. Figure out what your goal is when it comes to meals and your money. If you can afford to eat out every day, then do you sis! But maybe utilize a meal prep service at least once a month; that way, you don’t have to “think” about your next meal. And if you’re a girlie who likes to cook, then eliminate the mental fatigue by pre-planning your meals on your off days so you can just grab it and go throughout the week.
Tip 5: Notes & Calendar apps
What’d En Vogue say? Free your mind, and the rest will follow! When it comes to running your whole life, you’ve got to keep a schedule or else you’ll endure the mental gymnastics of trying to remember everything on your own. Utilize a calendar and write notes to yourself as they come to mind. Writing things down gets them out of your brain, freeing your mind from clutter and allowing you to rest.
Tip 6: Maintaining bills
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There’s not much you can do about having to pay your own bills. It can definitely be a lot harder to manage when you don’t have someone to (financially) depend on for things you didn’t plan, like getting a boot on your car, medical bills, etc… I’ve found that living below your means until you’re in a position to splurge, has helped tremendously. That means, to preserve my peace of mind, I have to say ‘no’ to hanging out sometimes unless, of course, someone else is footing the bill *wink wink*
Tip 7: Ask for help
It’s not a flex doing everything on your own, by yourself. This way of living is not supporting our soft girl era, ladies. Identify who’s in your circle and ask for help. Help might not always be monetary, but it could be in the form of asking someone to house-sit for you while the internet guy installs your router and you’re at work. That one effort of asking someone in your village for their time is indispensable.
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It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Alistair Berg/Getty ImagesStep 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Getty ImagesStep 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
DMP/ Getty ImagesStep 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
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