What Sex Workers Need You To Know About Their Careers

The plight of sex workers is one that goes unnoticed by most of the world. Even after the government made the life-altering decision to enforce laws like Stop Enabling Sex Trafficking Act and Fight Online Sex Trafficking Act that have put sex workers directly back in harm's way by forcing some to market on the streets.

Each act has shown literally nothing that statistically exemplifies and validates the initial purpose of these senseless laws. On this path, it won't take long before acts such as the End Banking For Human Trafficking actually make the cut, which would permit further censorship and evoke greater safety issues for sex workers by forcing them to carry large sums of money with them, as banks would be authorized to close the accounts of sex workers at their own discretion.

In this world, black women and men both inside and outside of the sex industry are forced to share the shame of others. What happens to us is consequential of that learned shame, so I'm ready to debunk what you know to be true about sexuality as it pertains to sex workers in hopes it'll create a better sex space for all of us. To accomplish this, I scoured the internet, my network, and ultimately with the help of friends, I was able to find 6 sex workers of color with 6 different accounts of what the industry is like and what they want you to know about their careers in sex work.

Valentine

Pronouns:

She/ Her/They

Occupation(s):

"My occupation and focus as a sex worker is in queer porn, erotic modeling, and exotic dancing."

What has your time in the industry been like? How has FOSTA impacted you?

"My experience overall as a sex worker has been positive and well received. I've been really grateful to have the influence I've had in my immediate circles. Exposure through people and networking a ton to get gigs I feel passionate about. I understand that my particular look does limit me in a lot of ways and my body type is something that may not always be considered, but I ignore those aspects of it and focus on being someone who is representative of other models/performers that look similar to me and want to see that representation in the media.

"FOSTA is starting to rear its ugly head in my realm. I use social media quite a bit and it's starting to limit access to areas in which we can post erotic content. I feel like overall this affects everyone. Not just sex workers, but our clients, our markets, even people who are just using it for artistic expression. Even things [where] people aren't blatantly sexual in nature will probably start to be affected. So my modeling may be under fire soon enough."

"Sex work is something that gives someone autonomy, is accessible for the disabled, therapeutic, and I think people deep down really understand that and don't want to acknowledge it due to social grooming."

What should the world know about sex work?

"The one takeaway the world should understand about sex work is that it's always existed. It's an exchange between two people and should be respected as much as casual encounters or taking someone on a date. There's still expectation and money involved. And unfortunately sometimes consequences as a result of the two. Sex work is something that gives someone autonomy, is accessible for the disabled, therapeutic and I think people deep down really understand that and don't want to acknowledge it due to social grooming. We need to get out of our heads about it and take a hold of it. Other countries have learned to accept it. We need to catch up."

To read more, click "Next Page."

Jessa Jordan

Pronouns:

She/Her

Occupation(s):

"I've dabbled in various types of sex work including work as a camgirl, an escort/sugar baby, a dominatrix, a burlesque performer, and a peepshow girl. Currently, I'm a stripper and nude model—which means I'm paid to pose nude, sometimes explicitly but usually for fine art, boudoir, fetish or even alternative fashion themes. I also shoot for, curate, and operate my own subscription-based app for uncensored adult entertainment content."

What has your time in the industry been like? How has FOSTA impacted you?

"My overall experience has been varied; as with any other occupation, it's been fulfilling in some ways and draining in others—I'm a womanist and I have had to really learn ways to mitigate the harmful psychological effects of the cis-heterosexual male gaze. Sex work has been my most steady stream of income for the past 7 years. The worst part has been the entitlement others have felt to persecute or fetishize me and since I'm Black, you can only imagine the misogynoir. The current socio-political climate has ensured that rampant whorephobia has increased, including trolling, harassment, and physical harm in real time.

"But even in that vein, I've met some of my best friends, seen and experienced more of this world than I ever would've thought possible due to my work. Unfortunately, FOSTA has ensured I have fewer resources to draw references for new clients or even platforms to meet new clients without going through tertiary means—which are often more dangerous, complicated, and unnecessary. FOSTA means I can have my social media, financial, email, or other accounts utilized for my businesses shut down randomly, which would destroy my ability to generate or continue receiving income I've already labored for."

"Being a sex worker is direct opposition to traditional norms and values surrounding what make a person respectable and yet it is also one of the most powerful and empowering occupations despite the incredible oppositions."

What should the world know about sex work?

"There have been a litany of posts regarding what sex work is and it's overdue that our society really discusses, unpacks, and educates people about what sex work is not. Sex work is the title bestowed to providers of services in the sex industry by a fellow sex worker and activist, Carol Leigh; it's an umbrella term and houses everyone from sex therapists to escorts. Sex work is not human trafficking. Sex work is not what people fall into just in order to pursue their drug habits, and it's not what people who make bad decisions do for work or just for dumb girls who are pretty and can't or won't do anything else. Sex work isn't often thrust upon someone; in fact, most of the time sex work is a choice—and even more often than not, it's an informed choice, given how accessible the industry has become because of social media and the elevation of the profession within pop culture. The sex industry is just that—an industry—and as such, its workers should be entitled to the same standards of dignity, empathy, and unionization as workers in every other field of work.

"Sex workers have graduate degrees (and loans to pay back), personalities, relationships, pets, families and friends just like other people because that's what we are—people. We are not asking for permission to exist and we are no longer entertaining the established, bizarre idea of morality that treats SWs as second-class citizens while abandoning scrutiny and justice for actual abusers, corrupt figureheads, and those who would rather keep marginalized citizens from true equity. We are demanding not to be murdered because 'no one will miss a whore.' We are demanding not to be raped, or to be believed when we do come forward because yes, you can be sexually assaulted even as a sex worker and no, that does not mean you are any less entitled to or deserving seeing your attacker be penalized to the fullest extent of the law... Being a sex worker is direct opposition to traditional norms and values surrounding what make a person respectable and yet it is also one of the most powerful and empowering occupations despite the incredible oppositions."

To read more, click "Next Page."

King Noire

Pronouns:

He/Him

Occupation(s):

"I'm a Master fetish trainer. A Master Fetish trainer is someone who helps people identify their fetish and then helps them find ways to live them and experience them in healthy, pleasurable, and safe ways. I'm an adult performer or male talent — "porn star" or however they describe it today — an Erotic Touch Masseuse, Fantasy Flight Pilot, and I've been a Gogo Dancer."

What has your time in the industry been like? How has FOSTA impacted you?

"I think since I do a lot of different things, a lot of times people are just a taken aback when they find out what i do. I think if people find out what I do before they've spoken to me, come to a lecture, or musical performance or anything else I do, they automatically think, 'Well, he slang dick for a living, so he's got no brain or no soul or no heart.'

"The perception of sex workers is that we're all doing this to pay for drugs or it's [generally] just a negative stereotype that a lot of people have towards sex work that kind of permeates into all the different aspects of what we do. People think that they can talk to you any kind of way, whether it's online or at a tradeshow. They think they can just put their hands on you. They say wild stuff that they wouldn't say to anyone else. I get d*ck pics, p*ssy pics, all types of sh*t all the time. If I get 20 per day, I know that a woman is probably getting 100 to 1000 a day... It's open season on anyone who is in the adult entertainment industry. I [constantly] have to remind myself that if it's like that for me, then you know it's way worse for what sisters are going through out here."

"I think it's important to look to people for who they are and their deeds instead of what their profession [is]. I think it's also important to realize sex is a natural thing, it's a beautiful thing, and we are all human."

What should the world know about sex work?

"We're your family, we're your neighbors, we're everyday people just like you — we just happen to make money in a different way. I think it's crazy that we live in a world where if somebody tells you, 'Hey, I work for the military and I drop bombs on people for a living," that's more respected than if somebody tells you that they dance and entertain people. What people do for a living doesn't make them good or bad, it's just how they earn a living.

"I think it's important to look to people for who they are and their deeds instead of what their profession [is]. I think it's also important to realize sex is a natural thing, it's a beautiful thing, and we're humans in a lot of ways. People come to us, who might not be able to find someone to help them experience the world in a way that they wanted to experience the world or open up their eyes to news ways to pleasure. It's not a negative thing, it's a positive thing. Everyone in the world got here through sex and I think most of us are having sex, so I don't think that's something that should be frowned upon."

To read more, click "Next Page."

Emiline

Pronouns:

She/Her

Occupation(s):

"I am an exotic dancer and work for a sex enhancement company called Pink Heffs."

What has your time in the industry been like? How has FOSTA impacted you?

"It has been an adventure for sure! It's an industry you must enter alone with little guidance, and lots of competition. But overall, my experience has been good. I have learned a lot about life and people. You can meet genuine people in this industry if you're selective and smart about who you let in your circle. It's another world but if you can apply what you learn to the real world you can make it in both. I would think FOSTA only really affects those dancers who solicit and promote their pages online. Shadowbanning is a threat for them."

What should the world know about sex work?

"The world needs to know that your favorite teacher, news anchor, or even your best friend's mom has probably dabbled in sex work. You would not believe how many people have stripped as a means to an end. Especially people in intense college programs or with mouths to feed. You never know what a person does in their private life or has done in their past! Many strippers are multifaceted people with normal lives. Realize this."

Editor's Note: Emiline herself is working to rebuild schools in Ghana through her non-profit Akua Ghana Gives Foundation.

To read more, click "Next Page."

Blaksyn

Pronouns:

They/Them/Theirs or He/Him/His

Occupation(s):

"As a sex worker, my focus lies in a few areas. Firstly, the type of sex work I mainly engage in is Professional Domination. This is a type of sex work that utilizes some or all aspects of BDSM in order to provide an experience that falls into the category of alternative sex practices. Through the use of BDSM, while being mindful of consent and safety, I am able to enjoy deeper understandings of the wants and needs of my clients through concise communication followed by physical and verbal acts meant to manipulate the body, mind, and/or spirit. Secondly, as a sex worker, I am also an educator concerning BDSM and advocate of and for the better treatment of sex workers."

What has your time in the industry been like? How has FOSTA impacted you?

"My experience as a sex worker has been that of a lot of highs and lows with more highs. Before I continue, it is important that I convey the amount of privilege I experience concerning my body composition, assumed gender, and type of sex work I mainly engage in as I consider these experiences. Sex workers endure a litany of negativity and hazards including but not limited to assault, stalking, cishet men, law enforcement, and death. From the perspective of a professional dominant, I command clients to act while exerting control as an authority figure. Factor in the presentation of a man, a baritone voice, and a 6'1, 240-pound stature and it is easy to see why I have had more highs. That privilege allows for less assault.

"I have been stalked or threatened, but never harmed. This is unique for sex workers, as many are assaulted and murdered every single year. On the other hand, this work has introduced me to amazing, interesting, and talented individuals in my travels for work. SESTA and FOSTA greatly impacted my sex work in numerous ways. One of the biggest is that it pushed me from a more safe environment like the internet and into the world at large. On the internet, I can cross reference a 'John' for safety with other sex workers while also ensuring I get pictures of identifying documents like a driver's license, which creates a paper trail in case any harm come to me. In the streets, I can't do that as spontaneity occurs more often and I rely on word of mouth and more visibility, which puts me at risk for run-ins with law enforcement."

"Sex work is work. Sex work is liberation."

What should the world know about sex work?

"Many sex workers are often part of several marginalized communities including that of sex workers. White supremacy, patriarchal control, disenfranchisement, socioeconomic disparities, and numerous other contributing factors have created a climate in which sex work is becoming more commonplace. However, one of the biggest reasons why we engage in sex work is because we fucking want to do so and have the ability. Over the years, there has been the all too common narratives that try to explain why we would do something that causes society to treat us less than human. This is an excuse to think of us as less than human at every level.

"Sexuality is a way for the marginalized to exercise autonomy and control in a world not built with them in mind. I love the control I have over my body and choices as someone who is not only self-employed running a business where I am CEO, but also because of the sense of freedom that inhabits my heart. Sex work is work. Sex work is liberation."

To read more, click "Next Page."

FreakJawn

Pronouns:

She/Her

Occupation(s)

"I am a stripper, I escort, and I do financial domination."

What has your time in the industry been like? How has FOSTA impacted you?

"It has been up and down. I have learned so much about myself and the industry. FOSTA doesn't really affect my job as a stripper but does make it harder to find clients as an escort. I can't put up ads or use website hosting sites."

What should the world know about sex work?

"Sex work is a damn job. Period. Strippers, cam stars, porn stars, escorts clock in and clock out. We provide a service the same way 9-5 working people do. If that makes you uncomfortable then that's your problem. Not ours."

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