4 Black Women On Their Relationship With Their Hair

Dayna Bolden

Name:Dayna Bolden

Title: Entrepreneur & Lifestyle Blogger/Digital Content Creator

"I would definitely say that I have a great relationship with my hair. When I first cut my hair, I remember walking out of the salon, looking in my mirror in my car and crying. I called my mom and my best friend and just cried like a baby to them explaining that I felt 'ugly' and 'I looked like a boy.' I was so dramatic. But thank God my family and my husband was super supportive of my new look. They all sung my praises and explained how good I looked with short hair, and that it fit my face well. After a few days, I got over it, accepted my new look, and rocked it! Since then, I have not looked back. I am obsessed with my hair cut, and wouldn't have it any other way!

"I definitely think there has been a cultural shift with short hair, especially short natural hair. These days, popular celebs are cutting their hair completely OFF. Short hair is looked upon as fierce, strong, beautiful, and unique. I think there is not as much pressure now to have long hair in order to be beautiful. Of course, we still live in a world where weaves and wigs are still a norm, but I also feel like women who embrace their natural, especially short natural hair is not looked at differently as they may have been 10 years ago.

"I am so grateful that I have built a platform where I can continue to inspire and uplift women to embrace their true, authentic selves. The number of messages and emails I have received from women over the past few years is such a motivation for me to continue to walk in my purpose. Cutting my hair was one of the BEST decisions of my life. Thank you for giving me this platform to share my story and hopefully inspire other women out there!"

Tomi Adesokan

Name: Tomi Adesokan

Title: Strategic Insights and Analytics Coordinator

"My relationship with my hair is wonderful. I love my hair; my hair loves me. I was kind of nervous to cut off my hair, but there was this one girl who inspired me to cut my hair. I made sure I didn't tell anyone that I was going to cut my hair, because I knew that they would discourage. I didn't tell my dad or my boyfriend at the time. I just did it. My dad just stared at me when he saw it and said at least I didn't look ugly (he's African). My boyfriend at the time just kept rubbing my head. My friends were hyped about me cutting my hair off.

"I think a lot of my memories as a child are associated with hair. I remember sitting on the floor crying while my mom tried to braid my hair. I remember being in my teens shedding tears when getting box braids or a blow out. The conversation has shifted and changed. It's changed to Black women doing whatever the hell they want to their hair and they could care less about your thoughts or the stereotypes. It's amazing to see women of color in media wearing various hairstyles. As always, representation matters. I just hope this isn't a trend/fad and that this shift continues. Just cut your hair, the amount of liberation you will feel is amazing and your wallet will be super happy."

Brittany Garth

Name:Brittany Garth

Title: Owner of Dimensioned Wellness

"I have a love and hate relationship with my hair, currently. I am constantly on the go and have a limited amount of time each morning to style my hair which has almost 'forced' me to wear protective styling for over a year now! As much as I love wearing extensions or braids, I often miss my hair. As a business owner and social influencer, I do a lot of speaking engagements, traveling, and TV appearances that call for my hair to look as polished as I can manage on the go. I would love to go BOLD one day do the big chop and grow out a curly 'fro.

Patrice Peck

Name:Patrice Peck

Title: Beauty Writer

"I did my third big chop last April, so I'm not really new to the natural life. As for my first big chop in 2008, I did that myself with some grocery store scissors while studying abroad in Cape Town, South Africa. I wasn't really nervous, because I'd already developed the 'it's just hair' mindset by that point.

"It was so liberating and empowering to prove to myself that I could do what I want to my body despite what society dictates and still navigate that society confidently. Also, this was before YouTube tutorials were even a thing, so I definitely want to shout out people like Patrice Grell Yursik of Afrobella and the tons of Black girls on Tumblr for providing tons of information, inspiration, and support for my natural hair journey. Oh yeah, when my youngest sister Courtney saw the pic of my new cut on Facebook, she said, 'Looks good! But Mommy's gonna kill you when you get home.' (laughs) My mom didn't even really care, she just teased me (and still does) about how I'm ALWAYS changing up my hairstyles. And guess what? Courtney ended up doing the big chop a few years later too!

"If you wanna cut your hair, I say go for it, go for it, go (Issa voice.) It's always helpful to do research beforehand, so look up articles and videos that share things you ought to know before doing the BC. And on those days where you're feeling like, 'Ugh! Fuck! I'm so ugly! Look at my damn FIVEhead!? Argh why the hell did I do this?!!!?', look up inspiration from natural hair celebs and vloggers and influencers who have hair textures similar to you. I do that often for my 4C hair texture and get so hype when I do! For all the 4C hair girls out there, check out the Instagram account 4CHairChicks and go down the rabbit hole of dope, fly people and their own accounts. Happy screenshotting!"