Paying a little bit extra for that all-inclusive resort can be both a convenient and cost-effective way to enjoy your vacation. I mean, who doesn't want to feel like they're getting the most bang for their buck, right?
If you're looking for a trip with minimal stress that allows you to lay out and soak up some sun without taking on the extra task of researching where to enjoy food, drinks, and some activities, all-inclusive seems like the only way to go. But not all resorts that boast "all-inclusive" are created equal, nor is everything truly included. Let's break down 5 things you need to know before you book your next all-inclusive vacation.
Food
Resorts like these provide round-the-clock eating (for the most part). However, not all resorts provide late-night room service. For me, if I pay for an all-inclusive package, I want a snack available to me at all times! Also, depending on the price point of the resort, the food is mediocre at best (even at the on-site restaurants that require reservations).
I've stayed at all-inclusive properties in Mexico, Jamaica, Dominican Republic, and Barbados, and while there's nothing like being able to have access to decent food with "all-you-can-eat" privileges, nothing beats getting off the resort and eating like a local. Some of the best and most authentic food that you'll ever enjoy in another country will not be at your hotel or resort. My suggestion is to venture out at least once during your stay. Also, keep in mind that while the buffet might be included in your fee, there may be surcharges at the fancier restaurants on the premises that provide table-service.
Liquor
All-inclusive also gives you the luxury of drinking as much as you'd like during your stay. Whoo Hoo!! But many times (again, depending on the price point), the liquor is mid-level and not top-shelf (which is how you can drink all day and barely get a buzz). You may have to come out of pocket for the "good stuff". Be sure to read the fine print on the resort website or call the hotel prior to booking in order to get better insight into what's included in your fee. You may also have the option of upgrading your all-inclusive package so that top-shelf liquor is included.
Regarding safety, there have recently been reports of tainted alcohol (particularly in Mexico). Be sure to watch your drink while it's being made, do not EVER leave your drink unattended, and be mindful of drinks with ice in certain countries.
Activities and Spa Services
Sometimes activities on the premises like non-motorized sports, cooking classes, and yoga might be included in your resort fee. An off-site excursion is usually a la carte, and many of those activities aren't cheap! Ask the concierge to help you book excursions at a discounted rate upon your arrival or at some point during your stay. Sometimes they have relationships with tour guides and people who lead excursions and they might be able to help save you a few bucks.
Spa services are also many times not included in all-inclusive rates and need to be booked separately. Obviously, there are exceptions. Some high-end, five-star resorts pamper their visitors with spa services but you'll pay a pretty penny to enjoy a package with those benefits.
Tipping
Some resorts have a "no-tipping" rule because gratuity is included in the price. Be sure to look up the resort policy. But don't assume that just because you're at an all-inclusive resort, that you shouldn't make sure the staff is taken care of. Exchange cash before getting on the plane if you're traveling internationally so that you can tip the resort staff and your driver (i.e cab or airport shuttle service). Waiters and room service attendants should receive about 20% based on service, bellmen should receive $1 or so per bag and your driver should receive a tip of about $5 (but if they're knowledgeable and can suggest some great things do and places to eat that are unique to the area, I would suggest giving them a little extra).
The bottom line is, tipping should be a part of everyone's travel budget. So don't skimp!
Resort Credits
This can be a great way to get a few extra perks out of your vacation. Resort credits are basically offered as cash back that you can use on services that may not normally be included in the all-inclusive package. Your credits depend on the length of your stay and can be used for things like a spa service, a special romantic dinner on the beach, tours, or even a round of golf. They might be given to you in the form of a cash card or a coupon.
Be sure to read the fine print for restrictions. Reservations for activities and dinners need to be made in advance, many times spots are limited to certain times of the day and there could be a penalty if you're a "no-show". They also cannot be used on future stays. Popular chains like Hard Rock and Riu offer resort credits. Check with your resort to see if there is a promotion on your booking that you can take advantage of.
The most important thing when looking to book an all-inclusive resort is to do your research!
Your resort should basically encompass your personality and vacation plans. Do you want an adults-only resort or do you mind children running through the halls? Do you want a resort with foam parties and spring breakers who dance until dawn? Or are you okay with everything closing at 10 P.M.? Check Trip Advisor for reviews and photographs on the cleanliness of the resort. Find out if they cater to patrons with food allergies. Look into the area where you'll be staying. Is it safe? Or has there been a recent spike in crime? Also, research off-peak times of the year when you might be able to save money. But keep in mind that you get what you pay for at a ridiculously cheap all-inclusive resort.
Sometimes it is better to splurge for comfort's sake!
Featured image by Shutterstock
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The essence of effortless poise and refinement shines bright through the iconic university colors of indigo blue, red, and white. Every October, Howard University students, alumni, staff, and friends gather on the prestigious campus in Washington, D.C. to take part in time-honored traditions and events, which is Homecoming. This year's theme, “The Meccaverse,” was a week-long celebration of Howard University’s heritage, including the Homecoming football game and Bison Pep Rally, the Fashion Show, Greek Life Step Show, Homecoming Day of Service, Lavender Reception, and the iconic Yard Fest Concert.
As 2024 marked the 100th anniversary of the Howard Bison trek back to The Mecca and after two years of virtual events due to the COVID-19 pandemic, this was to be a celebration of a lifetime. We enlisted HU alumnus Sharmaine Harris, a luxury retail buyer, as she revisited her alma mater as eyes on the yard for fashion-forward outfits mixed with personal style and campus pride for the weeklong celebration.
Before we get to the looks, discover how attending Howard University impacted her career in fashion and her day-to-day style:
Credit: Sharmaine and Friends
xoNecole: Describe your personal style. Did attending Howard have any impact on developing it?
Sharmaine: Howard taught me that there’s no such thing as being TOO dressed. There’s always a reason to “put it on” and look presentable, even if it’s just for a day of classes. Standing out was celebrated and encouraged with my peers embracing the opportunity, giving me the confidence to try new styles and trends.
xoNecole: How did Howard shape your career as a luxury buyer?
Sharmaine: I studied Fashion Merchandising, through which I was fortunate to have professors who were very connected to the industry and able to give first-hand accounts of opportunities and what to expect post-college. I was also able to build a network through my peers and other Howard Alum, which has opened doors to endless possibilities both within fashion as well as daily life.
The same confidence instilled in me through my style has also been rooted deeply within me as I step into any role or project I’m faced with throughout my career.
xoNecole: This year marked Howard’s 100th-anniversary Homecoming celebration. Can you describe what the weekend looked and felt like?
Sharmaine: I’ve gone to many Howard Homecomings since graduating, but this year’s 100th anniversary felt like a huge family reunion filled with nothing but love. It was beautiful to see so many Bison return home looking great and radiating joy. It was beautiful!
xoNecole: What makes Howard fashion different from other HBCUs?
Sharmaine: Being that Howard is The Mecca, we have such a diverse population with each individual having their own spin on fashion. Getting dressed is second nature for us, but the layered confidence is our secret ingredient to make any look come together. Through that comfortability to push barriers, we have a legacy of setting trends, as indicated by the many alumni we have in the fashion and entertainment industry.
Keep scrolling for the top street style moments from The Mecca's Homecoming weekend:
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Join us in celebrating HBCU excellence! Check out our Best In Class hub for inspiring stories, empowering resources, and everything you need to embrace the HBCU experience.
Featured image courtesy of Sharmaine Harris
Geeze. Even as I’m typing this out, I’m embarrassed to admit that I have seen even more than one episode. What got me to check it out initially was hearing so many people talk about the Michael, Meagan, and Sarah nonsense from several years back. And you know what? I don’t care if it was way back then or when I will watch a few minutes while channel surfing now, if there’s one thing that I’m always saying (sometimes even out loud) is I get why a lot of people “fall” for inmates: when individuals are in a controlled environment, you can constantly account for their time, you can get most of their attention — they are willing to say and do almost whatever you wish.
And for a control freak, that is a relational wet dream. Unfortunately, then, once the inmate is released, they go from dealing with correctional officers in jail (or prison) to relationship wardens. What I mean by that is, instead of them being closely monitored while in custody, now the person who they “dated” while they were locked up seems to act as if it is their job to put themselves in the same position as the officers.
A great example of this? GOING THROUGH SOMEONE’S PHONE WITHOUT THEIR PERMISSION. And although it’s so common that one survey reported that 56 percent of women and 44 percent of men do it (more women than men…hmm…), while another stated that a whopping 71 percent of folks said that they use their partner’s phone without them knowing (hell, 21 percent professed to doing it often too) — let me put it to you this way: I wonder how many people know that it’s a practice that the law actually frowns upon.
Don’t believe me? Take a few moments to scroll through this article a bit more. Please let it serve as a PSA that just because something is popular, that doesn’t make it legal or right. And honestly, when it comes to preserving your relationship, it’s not the wisest move in that department either. Not at all.
First Up: Going Through His Phone, Without His Permission, Is Actually Illegal
@feistyaquarius Here is a checklist to make sure you didn’t miss one inch of that 📱 - settings (passcode) -imessages ( groupchats, msgs with friends ( guy names too check them) - whatsapp -telegram -GPS - call logs -photos ( RECENTLY DELETEDS FOR ALL APPS -instagram -fb msgs -snapchat ! -DROPBOX -emails -cash app (apple pay transactions) #fyp #iphonetips #parentsoftiktok #relationships
That, umm, presentation is from feistyaquarius on TikTok. Although there were a few times when I was like, “Girl, what?” as I was watching it, I can’t really say that I was shocked overall because there are TONS (I’m not exaggerating either) of other social media posts that are very similar to it. It’s like people have made a science out of coming up with ways of going through someone’s phone without them knowing. And here’s the thing about that — it is actually illegal.
According to a law firm’s website that I checked out on the topic, “The Electronic Communications Privacy Act (ECPA) is a federal law that makes it a crime to access someone else’s private communications without permission. It covers cell phones, computer use, email, social media accounts, and other types of electronic communications.”
The act itself, you can read more about here, here, and here; however, as it relates to the day-to-day things of everyday relationships, that act is relevant in the sense that it doesn’t matter if you are dating someone, engaged or even married to them, if you are going through their phone (or texts or emails) without their knowledge and consent, you are not only invading their privacy, you are breaking the law.
Adding to that, if you go through a device that is password protected without their permission, that is considered to be a form of illegal spying.
GiphyAnd here’s the thing: whether you’re keylogging (using software to track what someone is doing on their computer), using spyware to monitor someone’s phone activity, you’ve put a GPS tracking device on their phone or even downloaded an app that keeps up with what they are doing on social media, based on where you live and what you end up doing with the information after getting it, if you get reported or caught, the consequences could be anything from a fine to actual jail time. And what if you’re doing this to see if your spouse is cheating on you?
From what I’ve read and researched there, that’s not gonna be very helpful for you either because many judges will see you as being controlling and/or intrusive and/or problematic. Plus, since many divorces can be entered in as a “no-fault” one, proof of infidelity won’t benefit you much anyway.
So basically, while you’re out here listening to TikTok detectives and their literal phone hack tips, I don’t even know if they’re aware that they’re encouraging you to low-key break the law — and possibly ruin your relationship in the process.
Strictly from the relationship standpoint, here’s why I say that…
Going Through Your Partner’s Phone Is a Sign of Distrust (and Disrespect)
GiphyPersonally, I never have been the kind of person who likes to snoop around people’s things. One reason is because I lived with a parent who moved that way (reading my diary and journals and everything). Another is because…I just think it’s disrespectful as hell. I mean, even when a friend’s phone rings or a notification goes off, and I’m closer to their phone than they are, and so they ask me to pass it to them, I will turn the face of the phone down and hand it over. Whatever they’ve got going on on their phone is their business.
And when it comes to past relationships, I honestly feel the same way. Just because we are together, it doesn’t mean that my partner doesn’t have their own identity and right to privacy.
Besides, if I feel like I need to know your every move, that means that either I don’t trust you and/or I want to run you on some level —and both of those things are toxic ways to deal with a relationship. And before one of y’all says, “Oh, I trust him, I just don’t trust who may be trying to communicate with him,” — can we please retire that tired saying once and for all?
If you actually trust your partner, other people don’t matter. They have enough self-control and integrity to handle themselves and whatever is transpiring accordingly. In other words, trusting them is all that you need to be concerned about. Period.
Going Through Your Partner’s Phone Is a Sign of Control
GiphyJealousy is a sign of being controlling in a relationship. Constantly “making” someone earn your trust is a sign of being controlling in a relationship. Treating someone like they are guilty until they prove to you that they are innocent is a sign of being controlling in a relationship. Gaslighting someone into violating their own boundaries in order to please you is a sign of being controlling in a relationship.
Pulling accusations and presumptions out of thin air is a sign of being controlling in a relationship. Feeling like you should know any and everything “just because” is a sign of being controlling in a relationship. And when you go through your partner’s phone without them knowing about it, pretty much all of these signs are being manifested in that action — one way or another. And who wants to be around a controlling type of individual?
There is no real-time or space to get into all of the reasons why someone is a controlling person. For now, what I will say is many people move like that because A) it was modeled to them while growing up; B) they have very low self-esteem, so they are insecure, and/or C) they seem to think that they should parent their partner (which is also toxic as hell).
A mental health expert by the name of Robin Skynner once said, “If people can’t control their own emotions, they then have to try to start to control other people’s behavior.” This basically means that controlling people need to control themselves instead of trying to control others — and what that basically boils down to is they need to be alone…until/unless they do.
Going Through Your Partner’s Phone Is a Sign of Hypocrisy
GiphyOkay, please tell me that you noticed the part of the TikTok up top when she said that she is gonna go through her man’s phone regardless, “So long as he doesn’t go through my phone.” Umm, you know what that kind of mentality is defined as being, right? It’s sho ‘nuf a hypocrite because a hypocrite is someone who says one thing and then turns around and does something different.
And honestly, when it comes down to it, I’m with playwright Tennessee Williams when he once said, “The only thing worse than a liar is a liar that's also a hypocrite!” because a hypocrite is not only arrogant and delusional enough to hold you to a standard that they don’t hold their own selves to, they also tend to lie to themselves as much as they lie to you in order to justify being that way.
Think about it: how is it that you feel that you have the right to violate someone else’s privacy and yet if the shoe were on the other foot, now it’s a problem? It’s basically because you know that all of it is wrong, and yet you’re okay being a walking contradiction. And anyone who is alright with twisting the truth like that, they aren’t someone who anyone should think is long-term relationship material. I am absolutely not budging on that conclusion, either.
Going Through Your Partner’s Phone Is a Sign of Liking (Potential) Drama
GiphyI’ve shared before that a Black series that I heard about late in the game and then binge-watched and enjoyed isChef Julian. While preparing to pen this, I thought about one of the issues that Julian had with his first love, who he was constantly on and off with (Mo), was that she was a snooper (one example starts at the 7:40 mark of this episode here). She was sneaking around when he wasn’t looking, all the while trying to see what was transpiring via the smartphone that he pays the bill for.
And here’s the thing about that: the fact that she’s lurking like that proves that she knows that she’s totally out of pocket. Yet besides that, say that she does find that he’s liking pics on Instagram (some of y’all really need to relax on that), that he’s talking to women that she doesn’t know, or even that he’s seeing someone else. You snuck around to find out, so…now what? You’re going to go off on him for not being able to trust him, and your evidence of that comes from you doing something that shows that he really shouldn’t trust you, either?
Hmph. Sounds like nothing but the onset of a lot of drama to me — and as an article that I once read on CNBC about dramatic people, three clear signs of being full of drama are they always move with a sense of urgency and they like to focus on negative (or potentially negative) things — oh, and they always want to be in control. Yep, in their own “special” way, dramatic people are control freaks.
So, what are you saying, Shellie? That if I sense something is up that I go into denial mode? No. However, if you can’t simply talk to your partner and/or you’d prefer to be a bootleg Inspector Gadget, that either means that your relationship has a lot more issues than your suspicions OR that you like drama and you’re trying to feed your appetite. Which is it, sis?
Going Through Your Partner’s Phone Is a Relational Red Flag (on Your Part)
GiphyIn BetterUp’s article from earlier this year, “16 red flags in a relationship to look out for,” some signs that stood out to me included overly controlling behavior; lack of respect or trust; conflict avoidance; lack of emotional intelligence, and an inability to communicate openly. And y’all, if you think about people who sneak into other people’s phones — how are these things not ultimately evident in their actions?
Also, if you want to give me pushback on that, if someone did any of this to you, would you not wonder the same thing about them? Would you not say that they are clear relational red flags? And, if someone were to ignore these kinds of flags, how foolish would they be to 1) stick around and/or 2) act shocked if things didn’t ultimately escalate?
Listen, it really should be enough that going through your partner’s phone without their permission is breaking the law yet, after all of what I said, if you don’t respect or trust them or you would rather sneak around than have a real and frank conversation, one way or another, your relationship is far more unstable and unhealthy than you think — whether they have something going on in their phone or not.
Bottom line, before trying to press your partner’s finger onto their phone while they are sleeping or downloading an app that hacks into their intel, ask yourself how you would feel if they did the same thing to you (BE HONEST) and then really ponder why you think that is the right/wise/smart move in the first place.
Personally, I don’t think any type of violation is a form of love. And as I tried to display here, almost ad nauseam, going through someone’s phone without their permission is a solid example of that.
And what if after reading all of this, you couldn’t care less? I say this in love, but you’ve got more internal red flags going on than you might think — and as a wise person once said, “I think my problem is, I like to see how red the flag can get.”
You wanna know what’s going on? ASK.
You don’t believe them? SHIFT.
Hacking isn’t the answer, though. Legally or otherwise. Ever.
Respect you and them enough to accept that. Fully.
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Featured image by Peter Cade/Getty Images