You all know we're big on affirmations over here at xoNecole, and we know all too well the benefits of speaking life over yourself and positivity on your day. And we love that affirmations can be used to trigger career advancement, workplace confidence, and motivation as well.
Whether you're struggling with a stressful project, need that boost of boldness for managing teams, or just need a few bright mantras to take your already sunny disposition up a notch, here are eight powerful affirmations to add to your list, specific to career promotion, leadership, and development:
"Everything I need to succeed at work is right inside of me."
This is something that has been repeated to me many times in life, from the people who raised me, to in-office mentors, to interviews with super-successful women, to church leaders, and it's real. When I sit and lean fully into my own ideas, my own unique way of looking at life, and my professional training and educational background that nobody can take away from me, I know I can create something great and continue to pay my bills.
"I am worthy and will stand on what my unique talents and time are worth."
Many of us struggle with this, and even I have to remind myself that I indeed should speak up more, advocate for myself more, and demandmore. We've all worked hard to get to where we are, so we actually do deserve our heart's desires when it comes to salary, recognition, awards, commissions, and quality of work life.
"I am completely capable of fearlessly and eloquently closing that deal."
This one is especially good when you're up for a promotion, have a big meeting you're leading for your company, or are trying to land a partnership, grant, or other expansion opportunity that will take your career to the next level. You got this, sis.
"I am a bold woman who leads with grace, compassion, and vision."
As leaders, we can't shrink at the sight of a challenge. Instead, embrace a bold confidence (even if you feel you're a bit delulu) and face those fears with the tools God gave us for combat. Grace, compassion, and vision always win in the long run, so if you can offer those things to people and your company, you always come out on top.
"I am the divine thermostat in the room—setting the temperature and the tone."
Alfred Edmond, Jr., my forever mentor who's an entrepreneur, author, and senior vice president, once told me this when I was having a super-emotional moment as an editorial manager: "Always be the thermostat. You set the temperature as a leader. Stay pleasantly solid in your tone and demeanor no matter what. You keep the power by doing so. You can't let every little issue rattle you as a leader." I was taken aback at the time, but his advice has served me well.
We don't have to always "match" the energy others give us—especially when you're managing teams, leading departments, or managing processes. Instead, you can set the tone and let people know, through your play-with-your-mama-not-me demeanor and professionalism. This way, no one can visibly lure you into embarrassing, unkind, or angry exchanges. As a power woman, that's beneath you. Period.
"I attract positive, growth-focused experiences because I am positive and growth-focused."
Again, sis, you deserve. When you embrace this truth, you often find yourself thinking positive, seeking out all things positive, and adjusting areas where the growth of positivity is lacking. I'm not big on "manifestations" that center on "attraction" being an ego-driven act of exclusion, "magic," or privilege— I'm more into prayerand allowing God to be the master of "attraction"—but when I think about this particular affirmation, it's something to remind us all to focus on ourselves in order to draw that same energy toward us.
And it's not that toxic positivity where we ignore very valid feelings of hurt, burnout, or disrespect. It's a foundational belief that despite the challenges many workplace environments present for us as Black women, we will always think highly of ourselves and prioritize gratitude while addressing both the good and the bad.
"I am fully capable of walking away from toxic environments and walking into those where I thrive."
This is a big one. No matter what your circumstances are, I'm a big believer in having the power to change them if they aren't helping you thrive through your purpose on Earth. Even if you have to create an exit plan that takes years to see to fruition, do it. Let's stop staying at jobs we hate or careers that just aren't a fit anymore. You can unapologetically chuck the deuces, embrace the unknown, be strategic, and enjoy the work aspect of your life to meet your lifestyle goals.
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Skylar sees things differently. At the time, she was shooting content on her iPhone. Temi came into the picture with a new perspective, an understanding of tech, and, eventually, a camera. “He doesn't give himself enough credit,” Skylar says. “He wasn't just my tripod. He wasn't just standing behind the camera and going ‘click.’ He was giving advice. He was giving me insight to how I could look at things from a different perspective. And I was like, 'Oh, he’s an artist.' I think it was maybe a heartbeat of that kind of energy of like, ‘Baby, can you take this picture?’ And it turned so quickly into, we're partners. We can work together in a way where we're advancing each other's creative thinking.”
The pair often says they’re two sides of the same coin. Skylar is an Aquarius. She attended art school, paints, and loves poetry. She’s more than happy to let the couple’s management firm and agency, Kensington Grey, handle their admin work. And, she loves to sleep in. Temi, on the other hand, wakes up early. He’s a Virgo. He loves a to-do list and regularly checks in on the couple’s brand partnerships spreadsheet to make sure everything is on track.
Because his storytelling was steeped in his love of technology, he didn’t always think of himself as a creative person. “Where I [am] the dreamer who wants to pluck things out of the sky and spend all day with my head in the clouds, Temi [is] so good at grounding me and helping me figure out how to make things make sense on paper. We just work together in such a complimentary way,” Skylar says.
It’s been more than six years since Brooklyn-based couple Temi and Skylar started dating, and nearly four since they cemented their working relationship. On TikTok and Instagram, the couple’s travel, fashion, and home content regularly rack up hundreds of thousands of views. They’ve worked with brands such as Coach, Aesop, Away, and Liquid IV, bringing their vibrant perspectives to every campaign they execute. Still, nearly two years since both Temi and Skylar committed to full-time content creation and creative directing, the couple says their romantic connection remains their priority.
“We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting,” Skylar says.
Working from home can make it hard to separate work from personal life for any entrepreneur. It can be even more challenging when your business partner is also your lover. Temi and Skylar had already used couples therapy as a tool to help them effectively communicate with one another. When they ran into challenges while working together, their therapist helped them set physical boundaries to help combat the issues.
"We told each other we would much rather go back to full-time jobs and preserve our relationship than to be full-time freelancers, barely getting a night's rest [and] barely kissing each other because we're so busy shooting."
“It actually took us doing very specific physical things to create boundaries between work and play in our relationship,” Skylar says. “So, for instance, we will only have conversations about work when we're out of bed or we're at the table or in the office. Initially, when we started, we had to light a candle to say that, 'Okay, this is a space where we're connecting, we’re not talking about work.' We needed really hard boundaries at the top. And then it became a little bit more organic.”
The boundaries have been crucial to implement, especially because the couple began working together so naturally. When the pair first met, Skylar was NY-based a social strategist for BuzzFeed and was using content creation to drive business to her lingerie company. She was shooting her own content. Temi was working for Microsoft in D.C. He’d recently traded in his DJing equipment for a camera. “I've always loved taking pictures,” he says. “Even when I was a kid, my African mother would wake me up at 3:00 a.m. [during a] party, and be like, 'Come take the family picture.'”
Growing up, Temi says he watched his parents support each other and be the true definition of partners. He knew he wanted the same for his own relationship. But, the couple also wanted to make sure they were being financially responsible. The pair didn’t quit their traditional jobs until they’d saved up two years' worth of their cost of living. And, Temi received his Master of Business Administration from New York University with the knowledge that it could either help him advance in his corporate career or be applicable to his business with Skylar.
Temi and SkylarCj Hart @hartbreakToday, they say their working relationship is more of a “quiet dance.” They still implement some of the boundaries they learned in therapy, but they also lean into their natural strengths and deep love for one another. When we speak, Temi has planned a date for the couple to see Princess Mononoke in 4K IMAX and added it to their Notion so they can factor it into their busy schedules. “I fully plan to date for the rest of my life,” he says.
Skylar says the couple doesn’t just wait for date nights to check in with one another, though. This often happens in the mornings, after Temi has made her peppermint tea and poured himself a cup of coffee. When they ask each other how they slept, she says, it’s not just a “nicety.” It’s a genuine question meant to foster connection.
“A lot of it happens during the day in the midst of work. We'll stop and we'll hug. Or we’ll slow dance in the kitchen,” she says. “Sometimes it's hard to set a whole date night when you have 7,000 things going on. So, we must grasp these moments and check in when we can. And I think it's become so organic to us that I actually didn't even realize how often we do it. But all day long, we're like, 'Are you good? I felt like your energy shifted,' because we're best friends, we just know. We just feel it happen.”
What’s better than being in love? Building wealth while doing it. Watch Making Cents here for real stories of couples who make money moves together.
Featured image by Cj Hart @hartbreak