When I get with my girlfriends, there is no subject that is off limits and the minute that I feel there is, I might just have to find some new girls to call my friends. Seriously though, when we come together, we're passing around rubber dicks and showing our best moves for the bedroom off if the Henny hits us hard enough. Hell, I've taken nude pics for my friend because that's what a real sisterhood looks like.
This is now and this has been the case since I began thinking about sex way back when. And, it's one of the first ways I began to challenge notions of sexuality -- by having these dick dialogues with my friends. It's how I discovered that my pussy didn't have to be hairy and it's how I coach myself through riding new dick.
Suffice to say, I choose my podcast like I choose my friends: authentically raw, laughable, and entertaining.
I have my official podcast that I tune into for inspo, emotional support, and a variety of real talk. For all the #BlackGirlMagic that they give and the occasional sex talk, there are days where I just want to get down to the nitty gritty and could use something a little juicy to get through the day. So I got myself a roster of sex podcast. And you know what? They're all hosted by women of color, so you know it's lit!
Related: 14 Podcasts You Should Listen to With Your Girlfriends
We're talking certified experts to everyday girls, download these 6 podcasts to divulge in an impromptu girl's talk.
Featured image by Getty Images
RELATED
Mercury enters Sagittarius on November 2, will be retrograde from Nov. 25 until Dec. 15, and will be in this sign until Jan. 8, 2025. Mercury in Sagittarius is bold and outspoken but, in retrograde, can come across as impulsive and brash. Thinking before speaking is important right now, and so is considering your values and interests before committing to something new. Since Sagittarius rules long-distance travel, this isn’t the best time to plan a new trip or to rush the ones already in place.
Consider where you want to be, and take your time getting there.
What to Expect from Mercury Retrograde in Sagittarius
A little more than a week after Mercury goes retrograde in Sagittarius, Mars goes retrograde in Leo. With these important transits happening in fire signs, energy can be misdirected right now. It’s about looking at the full picture and not overwhelming yourself with too many options or interests. Take your passions and align them with your heart and willpower, without confusing inspiration with ego. Emotions are running high, yet this activation is creating a breakthrough in personal development before the year ends.
Read below to see how this Mercury retrograde transit will be for you. Read for your sun sign and rising sign.
ARIES
Mercury goes retrograde in Sagittarius, and you are focused on the bigger picture right now, Aries. With Mercury retrograde in your 9th house of adventure over the next few weeks, this is the time to expect the unexpected and to go at your own pace. Don’t rush the clarity that is meant to bloom for you right now, and take things one day at a time.
Even if you don’t have all the answers you need right now, there are still some important truths and insights to gain. You are in the process of reinventing yourself and your life, and the universe is helping you get the space in order to do so. If you are traveling over the next few weeks, remember to be flexible and to go over plans thoroughly.
TAURUS
Mercury goes retrograde, and you enter a time of change and rebirth, Taurus. This transit, for you, is an opportunity to gain balance, perspective, and empowerment. Your commitments and close partnerships are being addressed right now, and you are seeing where your needs are being met and where they aren’t. You are on a journey of letting go and allowing more, and this is the time to focus on being more flexible rather than controlling outcomes.
This retrograde could also be affecting your shared finances and earnings, and this is a good time to take another look at the money coming in and the money going out and make sure things are in order here. Trust your intuition right now, Taurus.
GEMINI
Mercury goes retrograde in your sister sign, Sagittarius, and you are ready for a fresh perspective in love. This retrograde will highlight your 7th house of partnership, connection, romance, and inner harmony, and your heart is figuring things out right now. Confusion or disagreements are more likely within your relationship dynamics, and this is the time to address what your partnerships need.
If you have been feeling out of balance when it comes to love, then this is the time to get things back on track.
This Mercury retrograde is helping you gain a new perspective and reminds you that you deserve the love you are looking for. Use this time to forgive, grow, and use better judgment regarding matters of the heart and the relationships you are building in your life right now.
CancerCoveteur
CANCER
This Mercury retrograde transit for you is a chance to gain some renewed clarity regarding your health, well-being, and work life. You could be feeling more pressure to perform and have it all together on the job, and there is a need to delegate, let go, and take care of your health more right now, Cancer.
This transit will highlight where some cracks are seeping, where you may need to build stronger foundations and healthier daily routines, and also how you can manage a better work/life balance. Your daily lifestyle may feel a little more difficult to find consistency in right now, and this is because new avenues and perspectives are waiting for you to grab ahold of. Overall, use this time to listen to your inner voice and do more of what feels right for you and your body.
LEO
Mercury goes retrograde in Sagittarius, and this transit highlights your 5th house of romance, creativity, passion, and happiness, Leo. This retrograde is an opportunity for you to address what and who makes you happy and how you can show up more for these fortunate experiences in your life. You are looking at if you’ve been making your happiness as much of a priority as it should be this year and also taking a look at what sources help you align with that energy altogether.
This time is about being a little bit more flexible, doing things differently, and being open to a new perspective. Relationship developments are also providing your heart more clarity right now, and you are balancing your needs with the needs of your partnerships and creative ventures.
VIRGO
Your ruling planet Mercury goes retrograde before the year ends, and this is helping you rebuild your foundations, Virgo. Mercury will be retrograde in an area of your life that has to do with your home, history, family, and emotional stability- and you are getting a new grasp on things here.
Where you have been planting your seeds and building for your future are coming up for review during this time, and you are gaining clarity on which of these foundations is stable enough to continue to build upon. You could be feeling less secure than you would like to right now, and this change of pace is helping you reassess your goals and figure out what is worth it for you and the legacy you want to live.
LibraCoveteur
LIBRA
Mercury goes retrograde in Sagittarius, and the focus turns towards your communication channels, Libra. Mercury retro is already a more chaotic time when it comes to communication, and with this retrograde also happening in your 3rd house of insight and communication, you may feel this heaviness a little more right now.
This transit, for you, is about taking your time getting your message across, being patient while traveling and running errands, and giving yourself space to gain some new clarity.
Meditation, journaling, and talking to someone who can support you are therapeutic, and know that your voice deserves to be heard. You are looking at ways you can take up more space and show up in the world without letting your insecurities keep you away from true connection, vulnerability, and understanding.
SCORPIO
This Mercury retrograde is happening in your 2nd house of income, values, assets, and self-confidence, and you are taking a step back to assess your current reality, especially financially, Scorpio. This is a good time to go over your spending habits and earnings, to find greater balance here, and to think about some of your financial goals moving forward.
Look at your resources, skills, and talents, and make sure what you are receiving is equal to or greater than what you have been giving. Less is more right now, and this isn’t the best time to overspend or overindulge, as you need more time to grasp your current stance on things, and how to increase your overall wealth and abundance.
SAGITTARIUS
With this Mercury retrograde happening in your sign, it’s hitting a little closer to home for you, Sagittarius. This is a good time to refine your goals and direction in life and how you want to show up right now. You deserve to be able to change your mind when you need to, and you are thinking about some of the things you have done and what you want to do moving forward.
Miscommunications are more likely while Mercury is in retrograde, but you can use this as a source of empowerment, knowing that you are living in your truth and allowing yourself room to grow in the process. Remember to be a little kinder to yourself during this transit and to give yourself the grace you need right now.
CapricornCoveteur
CAPRICORN
This Mercury retrograde for you, Capricorn, is about rest and taking care of your emotional world. You are being given the opportunity to spend more time alone, to gather your strength, and to heal before you enter the new year. A lot has happened, and there have been many changes in your world this year. This Mercury retrograde is here to help you find acceptance and closure.
You are in a preparation stage right now, and things can feel a little more lonesome in this energy, but with a different perspective, you can see just how much of this space your heart truly needs right now. The past is coming up for you to see things in a new light, and you are ready to gain some renewed insight, closure, and healing.
AQUARIUS
This Mercury retrograde highlights your friendships, community, and your hopes and dreams, Aquarius. You are being reminded of the importance of connection, but more significantly, of good connections. You are looking at who and what surrounds you right now and gaining clarity on whether this energy matches who you are and the things that you stand for.
Your social circle and the people around you are shifting as the power dynamics do, and you are finding your place and purpose amidst this change. It’s about identifying who and what makes you feel good and aligning things in your life to bring in more of that energy. Don’t be discouraged right now; find your people and ask for support.
PISCES
Your career and ambitions are the focus during this Mercury retrograde, Pisces. You have a lot to address here, and you are gathering your skills and talents and reminding yourself that you are worthy of your dreams. Miscommunications and setbacks are more likely within your professional world, but they are here to ask you if what you are striving for, is really what you need right now.
You are thinking a lot about how you show up in the world, what you want to be known for, and what successes you still want to obtain. This isn’t the time to let anyone’s idea or vision of you define who you are; rather, define that for yourself. Show up as you want to be seen, and don’t count yourself out right now, Pisces.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by We Are/Getty Images
Whether it’s a hotel deal, a flight sale, or choosing a location where your money goes a little further, you can plan your dream trip on a budget. If your 2025 plan includes checking off a new city or country, we talked to a few travelers for tips and tricks on how they took an affordable trip this year.
St. Martin, West Indies
Christane "Kris" Njatcha
Courtesy
Christane “Kris” Njatcha, a digital creator based in Washington, D.C., recently traveled to St. Martin, a French island in the Caribbean that’s shared with the Dutch St. Maarten.
“I've been to the destination before and absolutely fell in love,” she says. “As a French speaker who loves French culture, Saint Martin is a 4-hour flight from Washington D.C., and you get a mix of beautiful beaches and superb cuisine.”
Njatcha says she spent a total of $1850 for a seven-day trip, and some of her trip highlights included dining at Villa Royale and checking out Pinel Island, a tiny island just a five-minute ferry ride from the French side of the island. Njatcha also says she saved money by flying out on a weekday, booking a direct flight to SXM on United Airlines for $400. She also rented a condo on VRBO, which cost $98/night, and rented a car for $118/week from Value Car Rental, which she says is an affordable way to see the tiny island.
“The best way to save money on travel is to choose a destination based on your budget,” she advises. “Open up Google Flights and check out some of the most affordable places based on destinations. Let the destination pick you, and not the other way around. When trying to save money, you have to be flexible.”
Charlotte, North Carolina
Branda Ayo
Courtesy
If you need a little fresh mountain air, a trip to Charlotte, North Carolina, is a great option. It was the first pick for New York-based freelance writer and content creator Branda Ayo, who flew to the city to attend the Black travel conference NoMadness Fest after a work trip to D.C. She made the weekend affordable by staying in the walkable downtown area, carpooling with other festival goers, and ordering food to her hotel.
“My flights cost $304.95 for a multi-stop journey from D.C. to Charlotte and then back to New York,” Ayo says. “My hotel, Hyatt Place Charlotte Downtown, came to $643.41 with trip insurance. My Ubers were affordable, costing only $107.84 for the four days I was there.”
Ayo also recently signed up for an AAA membership, which includes complimentary breakfast at her hotel. Ayo’s other weekend activities included a rooftop social at Merchant and Trade, dinner at Tupelo Honey Southern Kitchen & Bar, and brunch at Uptown Yolk, a cozy, Black-owned brunch spot downtown. If you’re looking to save money, she also advises traveling during the off-season, which can mean lower costs on flights and hotels.
“Start your trip planning early. The sooner you plan, the better your chances of finding good rates and avoiding peak season prices,” Ayo says. “If you’re flexible with dates, try to time your trip around the off-season. I’m sure if I’d gone a few weeks earlier, during Labor Day, prices would have been much higher.”
Chiang Mai, Thailand
Malikah Kelly
Courtesy
Malikah Kelly lives in Hong Kong full time, and the marketing manager and travel content creator was recently able to take an affordable trip to Chiang Mai, Thailand, utilizing credit card points and rewards.
“Chiang Mai has always been on my bucket list. I had never been able to make the trip happen when I was living in the US, but I wasn’t going to miss it since I was so close,” she says. “Visiting Elephant Nature Park was one of the best parts of the trip. It cost $150 and was one of the more expensive activities, but the money goes directly to supporting operations and caring for the elephants.”
For the five-day trip, Kelly says she spent about $350 on flights and $700 on activities, while her hotel was free because of credit card points. Before her trip, she opened an IHG Rewards Credit Card with a $95 annual fee, and it came with a huge welcome bonus and a free anniversary reward night, which covered the annual fee.
“Don’t sleep on credit card hacking,” Kelly says. “It seemed so gimmicky for a while, but since I started about a year and a half ago, I have been to Vietnam, Thailand, and Bali, and I’m planning a longer 10-day multi-city trip to Sri Lanka, Bali, or Cambodia for February 2025. Just be sure only to charge your regular spending and pay off your balance. Don’t rack up credit card debt with irresponsible behavior and impulse purchases.”
Chicago, Illinois
Sierra Redmond
Courtesy
The Windy City is one of the most beautiful cities in the U.S., especially during the summer when the city comes alive with concerts, outdoor dining, and free movie screenings.
“After hearing so many amazing things about summertime in Chicago, we decided to book it to beat the summer heat of Las Vegas,” says Sierra Redmond, a content creator and marketing director based in Las Vegas. “Some of the highlights were staying at the Kimpton Gray Hotel, visiting the world’s largest Starbucks Reserve Roastery, and trying some of Chicago’s iconic eats.”
Redmond says she spent about $1200 for a family of three for four days: $600 for round-trip flights from Las Vegas, $250 for the hotel and onsite restaurant (after redeeming Amex points), $300 on food off-property, $200 for attraction passes, and $150 for transportation around the city. Some of the ways she saved were by utilizing public transportation and using credit card points.
“The L train costs $5 per person per ride, saving us hundreds of dollars immediately,” she says. “Secondly, we used points from our AMEX platinum to book the Kimpton Gray. We also saved money by purchasing the Chicago C3 CityPass. It allowed us to pay one fee and choose the three attractions that were most important to us.”
Like other budget travelers, Redmond says to be flexible about where you want to travel instead of seeing your sights on a particular location.
“I always tell travelers to follow the deals and not the destination,” she explains. “We booked the trip with no destination in mind. Instead, we put some ideas that fit what we wanted to accomplish out there and chose based on the price of the flight and amenities of the city.”
Tirana, Albania
Vivienne Dovi
Courtesy
If a romp through Europe is more your style, consider Albania, a Southeastern European country that’s been quietly gaining popularity. London-based journalist and content communications consultant Vivienne Dovi says she spent around £962 (about $1,225 USD) on her seven-day trip, including hotel, activities, and food. Her trip included stops in three cities: the capital, Tirana, and Himarë and Ksamil. The highlights were a speedboat tour to Grama Bay, visiting caves and secluded beaches in Ksamil, and paragliding for the first time.
“I’ve had Albania on my mind for a few years after seeing a photo of the Albanian Riviera,” Dovi says. “I love emerging destinations, and with tourism in Albania just starting to flourish, I wanted to experience the country before it becomes more popular.”
For Dovi, some of her cost-saving methods came down to booking hotels in person (one hotel offered her a discount and room upgrade), taking buses vs taxis, and choosing an inexpensive, up-and-coming destination.
“Try and choose destinations where the cost of living and tourism prices are reasonable,” she says. “You’ll enjoy more value for your money, which means fewer compromises and a better experience overall.”
Cartagena and Medellin, Colombia
Brittany Smith
Courtesy
If you’ve been thinking about visiting Colombia, consider this your sign. Educator and freelance writer Brittany Smith traveled to Cartagena and Medellin, Colombia, on a week-long trip, and she was drawn to the destinations because of their affordability.
“Colombia has been on my bucket list for a while now because of what I've heard about its food scene, the scenery, nightlife, and more specifically, its affordable options,” she says. “When I researched Colombia, I realized Medellin and Cartagena offered incredible experiences at a fraction of the cost compared to other destinations. Plus, I knew if I could manage to visit both cities, I'd get to experience a perfect combination of city life, history, and spending time in nature.”
Smith says she spent under $800 for a weeklong trip, which covered her food, excursions, and hotel, which she split with two friends. Some memorable moments from the trip included island hopping in Cartagena and a day trip to Palenque, the first free African town in the Americas.
Smith attributed her low-cost trip to using credit card points to pay for her flight and comparing the excursions on platforms like Airbnb Experiences, Get Your Guide, and TripAdvisor.
“One of my best travel-saving hacks is to talk to the people that live there,” she says. “The locals know where the deals are and can hook you up with more authentic experiences if you genuinely connect with them. Also, traveling during shoulder season can help you avoid those peak prices and the big crowds.”
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Feature image courtesy