This Is Us might have a majority white cast, but they show love to their African-American viewers like no other. I might only see a handful people on the show that look like me, but so far, they've made up for it when they saluted what it really means to be an Black woman with tresses that wouldn't traditionally be described as "good hair."
I've seen a plethora of predominantly Black shows where the woman would go to bed with her hair looking like she just left the salon. I would think to myself, So she's not gonna put on a bonnet?
Then you have moments on This Is Us where Kevin Pearson buys his African-American girlfriend a silk pillowcase and she has to break down why it was so important. Read on to check out how This Is Us embraced natural hair in more ways than one:
1.#SilkPillowCaseMagic
I know I'm not alone when I say Kevin's realization of what it really means to take care of natural hair was everything! This Is Us has been consistent in all of its seasons showing love to Black hair and this season is no different.
In Season 3, Episode 5, he was traveling with his girlfriend Zoe who was upset because she didn't have her silk pillowcase with her. While we know how a silk pillowcase can make or break what happens to our hair overnight, it's completely understandable that Kevin didn't have a clue. Still, being Kevin, he ordered her the best one he could find. His support made him deserve all the applause and then some.
2.Randall’s Coconut Oil And Scarf Declaration:
One of the first times I knew that I would be into all things This Is Us is when Randall Pearson gave an epic shoutout to his wife, Beth's, natural hair care routine. Yes, Randall was adopted by a white family, but it's safe to say that he's always intentional about showing love for the Black community. This particular moment happened in Season 2, Episode 7.
Shauna, the mother of Beth and Randall's now adopted daughter, Deja, tried to come for Randall and how woke he may or may not be when it came to raising her Black daughter. He made it clear he's as woke as they come when he said, "Don't get it twisted, sis. I wake up every day to a headscarf and coconut oil. I'm married to a Black queen, not that it's any of your business." From him calling her "sis" (not in a demeaning way), to calling his wife a queen and showing love for her headscarf and coconut oil in between, I'm here for every little bit of it.
3.Beth’s Natural Hairstyles:
Let's think about this for a second. This Is Us airs on a major network during primetime. Beth Pearson (Susan Kelechi Watson) is one of the main characters. I wouldn't be giving the side-eye if she sported sew-ins and straight hair. But no. I can't even remember a time when Beth rocked anything other than what would resemble natural hair.
From braids to protective styles, I'm in love with her appearance. One of the things that I appreciate most about this, and even the other points in this article, is that This Is Us doesn't do these things to try and prove that it's for African-American viewers. It's so organic that I'm convinced their aim is to simply show the realness of never being afraid or ashamed to embrace our Blackness in a predominantly white environment.
4.Getting Real About Black Hair Care:
Speaking of Randall Pearson's family, this list definitely wouldn't be complete if I didn't point out the scenario with their adopted daughter Deja's hair. This one took place in Season 2, Episode 4. When she was first introduced to the family, Deja had no clue how to take care of her hair.
While they could have given her a more mainstream-friendly style when her hair was brought back to its healthy status (which they revealed took much more than a wash and a deep condition), they took another route. Plus, Beth and Deja had a tear-jerking bonding moment over their hair, that included Beth reassuring Deja that her struggle with alopecia wouldn't run her life. Fast-forward to now, to say Deja frequently wears her short and sassy natural coils is an understatement. 'Cause homegirl is always rockin em.
5.Pool Scene:
This Is Us/NBC
Before This Is Us showed love for anyone in Randall's family and their natural coils, it didn't take long to bring attention to the fact that his hair is unique too. I feel like the first time This Is Us addressed natural hair was in Season 1, Episode 4 when the old-school Pearson fam took a trip to the pool, in Randall, Kate, and Kevin's childhood days.
The matriarch, Rebecca Pearson, was honestly doing all she could to help Randall adjust to being raised by a white family. But it was a friendly woman at the pool (who ironically is the real-life wife of the actor who plays Randall) who let her know that Randall needed to see a barber who specialized in black hair so he wouldn't suffer from ringworms and hair bumps. It took a minute for Rebecca to come around but she finally did when she saw young Randall scratching his head. She also let him hang out with the woman's family so he could learn more about his own culture. I love how the guest star threw in that Rebecca needed to put lotion on Randall when he got out of the pool, 'cause we get ashy sis.
Do you have any favorite This Is Us moments or natural hair moments you've seen on TV/film? Let us know below!
Featured image by NBC.
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But Shellie, I don’t like them. Sex feels better without them. In an unbelievably ideal world where everyone waited until marriage and then remained with their spouse until death, you could be out here raw-ing it. With that not being even close to the case, though, it’s time to stop trying to skirt around using condoms and, instead, it’s time to figure out which ones can give you maximum pleasure.
Believe it or not, I’ve got a few tips, in the rubber shopping department, that just might help you out.
First Up, Most Women Can Tell When a Condom Is On
GiphyMy guy friends and I tend to have the most random conversations, boy. Take the time when two of them were trying to debate me down about whether or not women can tell if a condom is on. Their vote is that we can’t. Mine was that we absolutely can. And I mean, shouldn’t the one with the vagina (me) have a say, fellas? LOL. Hey, they don’t have to take my word for it because science also states that based on the material that the condom is made out of and how well it fits on a woman’s partner (more on that in a sec), they definitely help her to know if a guy is wearing one or not.
Not only that but data also backs up that a condom can also diminish the sensation that women feel during sex to a certain extent — not to mention that, sometimes, rubbers can affect natural vaginal wetness too.
With condoms having a 98 percent success rate at preventing STI/STDs and unwanted pregnancies (when used correctly, that is), by no means am I even coming close to implying that you shouldn’t use them (especially if you’re not in an exclusive or monogamous relationship [check out “Why I Use The Word 'Monogamous' In Marriage And 'Exclusive' In Dating”] and you and your partner don’t get tested annually).
All I’m saying is if you want to get the most out of your condom use experiences, you shouldn’t just assume that whatever condom the guy has on tap is what will work well for you — and figuring out what will bring you the most (pun intended) pleasure means that you should consider the following points.
Make Sure the Condom Fits Your Partner Well
GiphyWith the average size of a man’s penis being a little over 5” when it’s erect (relax, vaginas are around 4” unless stretched), it really is time to let all of the Magnum dreams go. And what I mean, specifically, by that is, guys bringing those just to fit into some stereotype of “packing” is doing no one any good because if it’s too big for him, it will result in slippage and if it’s too big for you, it could make sex a bit uncomfortable.
And what if it’s too small? Well, that could be semi-painful for him which could cause his performance to struggle. Bottom line here: condoms should have a snug fit and cover the entire penis.
And if you want to purchase some for your own collection — well, if y’all are close enough for him to be inside of you, you shouldn’t feel uncomfortable talking to him about which kind/brand of condoms you should have on tow at your house. By the way, for tips on how to choose the right condoms, check out verywellhealth’s “Condom Size Chart: Finding the Brand and Style That Fits Best.”
Opt for Condoms That Are Free of the Following Things
GiphyWhile reading an article on what many doctors consider to be the best condoms, what stood out most to me was a female doctor who said that women must keep in mind that whatever goes into their vagina, also gets absorbed. This includes ingredients that condoms may be made out of including parabens, fragrances, GMOs (genetically modified organisms), synthetic dyes and flavors, and glycerin (for starters).
And gee, when you’ve got that stuff, not only inside of you, but moving around at a semi-rapid pace (at least some of the time), there’s a pretty good chance that your vagina isn’t gonna be very happy about it.
The remedy? Consider investing in some organic/vegan condoms — ones that are free of all-a-dat. Loveability makes some (here). Smile Makers make some (here). HANX makes some (here). And that’s just a few options to choose from. This point is a very valid one to keep in mind because, sometimes, it’s not the condom that’s pissing us off — it’s what it’s made out of that’s the actual issue.
Pre-Lubricated Condoms Can Improve Your Partner’s Stroke
GiphyIf you’ve never tried pre-lubricated condoms before, you definitely should because they can have your back, on the sexual pleasure tip, on a few different levels. For one thing, these types of condoms can definitely decrease the chances of a rubber breaking which can give you the peace of mind that you seek during the act. Also, condoms that have lube in them can make it easier for your partner to put it on, can make it more comfortable when it’s time for his penis to go inside of you and can reduce the amount of friction that you feel (especially if you’re not naturally wet enough) while you’re having sex.
While we’re on this topic — I don’t know why (so many) people think that they can’t get an STI/STD from oral sex because they absolutely can. So, if you are going to use a condom during fellatio (or a dental dam during cunnilingus), adding some flavored lube to an already flavored condom (like perhaps this brand here or this brand here) can make the experience much more…satisfying.
Polyisoprene or Polyurethane Condoms MAY Reduce Yeast Infections
GiphyOkay, this point is a bit tricky because, technically, condoms can’t give you a yeast infection; in fact, since they prevent sperm and semen from entering into your vagina which can potentially throw off your pH balance, rubbers usually play a role in preventing them.
Still, I wanted to include this due to what I said earlier about all of the “extras” that can sometimes go into making a condom — because those things? They might irritate your vagina which could ultimately lead to a yeast infection. Plus, if on the off chance, you’ve got a latex allergy, condoms that are made from that material could give you a yeast infection too.
The solution to both? Consider going with alternatives like polyisoprene or polyurethane. Although polyisoprene is more expensive than latex condoms, they are super comfortable and latex-free (although you can use them the same way that you would a latex condom, including when it comes to oral and anal sex).
Meanwhile, polyurethane deserves a shout-out because it’s actually stronger than latex and it can even handle oil-based lubricants (which is something that latex is not able to do). Polyurethane is also thinner than latex and polyisoprene which means that sex can end up feeling more intense for you with those.
Textured Condoms Are Bomb If Orgasms Are Your Goal
GiphyUh-huh. I keep trying to tell y’all that if you want your partner to be sensitive about and thoughtful towards how your vulva appears (check out “Did You Know That There Are 10 Different Kinds Of Vaginas? Yep.”), the jokes about uncircumcised men really need to cease; especially since word on the street is the extra skin can actually make sex more intense for them while giving women more orgasms in the process.
And that actually helps to make sense of why textured condoms can cause women to cum more often and consistently as well. Thanks to the tiny ribs and dots on textured rubbers,they have the ability to stimulate the nerves that are inside of your vagina far more and easier than “regular” condoms do. Oh, and if you add someCBD lube to them? LOOK. OUT.
___
I’ll be real with y’all — when it comes to condoms, I think it’s always important that their purpose is protection over pleasure as far as how they are made. Still, with all of the advances in them out here — and now that you have this info as far as what your vagina would prefer — rubbers don’t have to feel like a downer. The right one can have you and your vagina climbing walls — plus, you can have the peace of mind that your health and family planning preferences aren’t being compromised in the process.
Music to your vagina’s ears. 90s R&B, to be exact…I bet. LOL.
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Featured image by FabrikaCr/Getty Images