Friends to lovers, is there a trope in media that hits quite as satisfying? Well, there is also the bad boy gone good for the love of a woman trope that also piques my interest in romance and fiction. However, in this article, we’re leaning more towards my lover girl side who feels both seen and heard when watching the slow burn of a love story play out between two souls destined to be a thing.
When done right, it’s more Lois and Clark from the later seasons of Smallville, or who could ever forget the life, rhymes, and chemistry that sparked between Sanaa Lathan and Taye Diggs in Brown Sugar? When done wrong, that’s a whole ‘nother story.
And it’s why we are here today. Join me in recounting 5 friends-to-lovers storylines that didn’t quite work (for me) in some of our most coveted TV shows. As a brief disclaimer, I understand that art depicting life is just that, art depicting life. In life, you have relationships and sometimes they will not work out. This list is for fun and in no particular order. Now, let’s get into it!
Friends-to-Lovers Fails in TV
1. Laura Winslow and Steve Urkel, Family Matters
Maybe I was blinded by what I felt was chemistry between Laura Winslow (Kellie Shanygne Williams) and Stefan Urquelle (Jaleel White), but I think when I first watched this, I saw it for this eventual couple. However, rewatching it years later and seeing all the ways Steve Urkel (also Jaleel White) pined after Laura to the point of stalking and desperation for most of the series’ nine-season run, and the way Laura didn’t return his affection in a significant way until the last season of Family Matters, the characters finally getting together ended up feeling anticlimactic.
Although it was framed as growth for both characters, their eventual romance ultimately felt like Steve just wore Laura down (nearly a decade of his persistence, mind you).
As one of the main romances explored in the iconic show, when it boiled down to actual moments of budding love between the characters, they left much to be seen. A lot of that could be attributed to the length and the perpetual drawing out of the question of "will they, won't they?" As a viewer, you knew they would get together by watching nine seasons of buildup. However, as a viewer, it also got a little old, and with each passing episode, reasons they shouldn't be together stacked up more than reasons that they should be. At least, for me.
Between Steve spending most of the series obsessed with Laura and Laura’s consistent indifference, dismissiveness, and lack of attraction towards Steve without a change in physical appearance, I was left wondering why we ever saw it for these two in the 90s.
2. Hakeem Campbell and Moesha Mitchell, Moesha
Whew, I hated the Hakeem-Moesha storyline with a passion. The reason behind my why is partially selfish but I also like to think it is partially in the right. The selfish side wanted to see a healthy platonic relationship between opposite sexes on television and I felt like Moesha (Brandy) and Hakeem (Lamont Bentley, R.I.P.) represented that for much of Moesha’s series run. I even thought having an episode or two here and there that showcases one or both of them thinking about wanting more was realistic because sometimes when you’re just friends you have questions about why you have to stay just friends. So whispers of a crush popping up in these storylines didn’t bother me.
I loved that Hakeem and Moesha were best friends, had each other’s backs, and disagreed at times, but through maturity, they were able to grow. It was beautiful.
However, all of my good feelings about this pairing were completely thrown out of the window during the college arc of the last two seasons when they put the friends-to-lovers storyline in overdrive and the sweet daydreams of each other were replaced by a sour reality. Hakeem as a best friend was great, but Hakeem as Moesha’s boyfriend felt like such a departure from the character he showed himself to be throughout the four seasons prior.
Hakeem was one of those characters who got "the girl" but ultimately wasn't ready for her when he had her. What played out instead was a clear display of their sheer incompatibility.
He was insecure, he was jealous, he was borderline possessive, and then when he and Niecy (Shar Jackson) kissed, I was through. Don’t even get me started on the episodes where he tried to “win” her back after that. I legit wanted to throw the entire show away. These days, I pretend the college seasons don’t exist. I’m more at peace that way.
3. Thaddeus “T” Radcliffe & Stevie Van Lowe, The Parkers
Continuing on the Moesha train, we are making a quick stop at their spin-off, The Parkers thanks to the noteworthy inclusion of a friends-to-lovers storyline between “T” (Ken Lawson) and Stevie (Jenna von Oy). On a personal and somewhat unrelated note, I loved the trio of Kim (Countess Vaughn), T, and Stevie on The Parkers. Something I especially admired about their friend group and the friend group of Moesha, Niecy, and Hakeem was that it never felt like T and Hakeem had to present differently to fit with the women they were friends with in their respective groups. An example of this is the guys weren’t “one of the girls” in their conversations just because they were best friends with two women, they were themselves. I liked that. And again, I loved that it was strictly platonic.
That all changed in season 4 when T and Stevie had a romance arc and briefly dated. What I will give them credit for is that they didn’t draw it out for a long time (ahem, Moesha) and it also didn’t impact the plot (aside from some jokes scattered here and there). It was quick and mostly painless. Still, when the couple unraveled, I didn’t like how similar it felt to some of the issues I took with the Moesha-Hakeem storyline in the end, i.e. T’s jealousy. Speaking of which, Hakeem’s season 4 guest appearance on The Parkers as Stevie’s former flame is what ultimately ended this short-lived friends-to-lovers storyline entry.
4. Joan Clayton and William Dent, Girlfriends
'Girlfriends'
On my first watch of this Girlfriends arc, I loathed this storyline. It felt abrupt, unnatural, and dare I say, desperate. I didn’t get them and couldn’t understand why the Girlfriends writers were taking Joan Clayton (Tracee Ellis Ross) and William Dent (Reggie Hayes) in this direction. But giving the series a rewatch in my adult years forced me to look past the numerous ways I thought their romantic storyline was implausible and unrealistic when I was younger. Now, I saw it for what it was.
They were best friends, they got each other in ways that others in their lives sometimes didn’t, they saw each other (I beam at every holiday episode where Joan’s girlfriends are complaining about everything Joan has them do but William gleefully falls in line because it’s their shared joy). Aside from the very apparent lack of physical and sexual intimacy between them, I understood them as a couple more. But, I’ve come to realize I still don’t like them together.
Not only was it a plot that felt like they touched on in a different way through William and another character on the show Lynn getting together for a fling (as well as a kinda-sorta one-night stand with Joan that wasn’t completed because Joan was, and I quote, "an ooch-ouch girl"), but the way they built up the relationship as something meaningful just to throw it away because of a few comments by Toni, Maya, and Lynn (who were making some good points, but still), it just felt like, what was the reason?
Admittedly, as a change of pace, it was interesting to see that their trying to be a couple romantically did impact their friendship. I’ve always admired that Joan tends to take the high road in her breakups and seems to be on good terms with most of her exes, but it seemed like she wasn’t able to effortlessly revert to being “best friend Joan” to “best friend William” which was interesting because their split was more amicable compared to other boyfriends she had had in the series.
However, that juxtaposition was also something I took issue with because I enjoyed their chemistry as friends far more than lovers and it felt like a long road getting back to the dynamic I once loved them for.
5. Freddie and Ron, A Different World
By now, it may or may not be obvious that I am not a big fan of diminishing yourself to get the person you’re trying to be with. In my entry about Laura and Steve, that was one of the things I didn’t appreciate about Laura’s nature to soften for Steve mostly as Stefan or when he is a more subdued version of the guy he is repulsed by. A Different World didn’t seem to be relaying that message with this pairing, but I just didn’t appreciate the way it felt like Ron only saw Freddie (Cree Summer) after she brushed her signature curls into a tight bun and exchanged her boho chic for corporate chic.
Though Freddie’s change in appearance was meant to be viewed as a personal evolution several seasons into the series and post-grad, there was something about the fact that she had always been there, and for some reason, Ron never looked twice at her until that dramatic physical change. What hurt their cases even more for me was the fact that both of them were cheating on their respective partners at the time with each other. Hated it. Hated it. Hated it.
Funnily enough, Freddie’s boyfriend Shazza Zulu (Gary Dourdan) was meant to be a parallel to Ron, showing that whereas Ron was accepting the new Freddie, Shazza wanted Freddie to be the “old Freddie.” I didn’t like either approach truth be told, but the fact that they were sneaking around behind their partners’ backs solidified the fact that the storyline just wasn’t it for me and that’s okay.
It’s just another season of a show I love that I don’t need to revisit. Again, I am at peace.
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Featured image via Girlfriends/The CW
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It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Alistair Berg/Getty ImagesStep 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Getty ImagesStep 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
DMP/ Getty ImagesStep 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
Featured image by zamrznutitonovi/Getty Images
However, to my surprise, I received an email that read: “It’s with great excitement that we announce your film, Super High: A Period Piece, has been selected for the 24th Anchorage International Film Festival.” After looking at the flight distance from Atlanta to Anchorage—a solid 10 hours one way— I’d decided this would be one I wouldn’t attend.
That was until there was a follow-up email that shared that the festival was sponsoring two excursions for filmmakers: A Northern Lights Tour and A Glacier Hike.
With that, I knew I had to make the trip to the 49th state! I flew Delta, which offered the shortest layovers—just 50 minutes each way. For a more comfortable flight on the longer legs that were about six hours between my layover city and Anchorage, I upgraded to first class with an in-app discount for $256 (the regular price of a first-class ticket runs about $2,100), which was so worth it for additional space and service for the six-hour trek.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
"So What’s Alaska Like? Did You Have To Wear a Snowsuit? What’s the Food Like?"
These are among the major questions I’ve gotten. Anchorage reminds me less of a bustling major city and more of a small town with an easygoing feel. When I arrived, they’d just had snow a few days before, so it was cold, and the streets were slick. So, I was so happy I’d invested in a pair of snow boots. For my first few days, the locals said it was warm. Warm to them being 20s at night and mid-30s during the day.
However, by the time I left, fresh snow was on the ground, and temps were well into the single digits—and it felt like it. Oh, the sun doesn’t rise until 10:30 a.m., and it sets around 4 p.m. That was among the most challenging things to experience because I felt like I never really woke up. So, between the lack of sun and the four-hour time difference, I felt tired the whole time I was there.
As for food, I didn’t explore a ton because I was so cold. But I found two gems! First was Whiskey and Ramen. If you enjoy ramen and exceptional service, this is a must-visit. I’d make a trip back just for their Wagyu ramen and their special take on an old fashion!
And, for coffee, I thoroughly enjoyed That Feeling Co. The coffee was great, and being surrounded by plants helped to perk up my spirits.
The Northern Lights
Iceland is one of the most popular places to see the Northern Lights, so I was very excited to know that Alaska also gets to see the Aurora Borealis light show. Typically, many people visit Fairbanks to see them, but there are tours offered in Anchorage too! When prepping for the late-night tour, we’d heard that the night we were heading out to see the lights, the cloud coverage likely meant we wouldn’t be able to see them. Bummer. I know. So, we could sit the tour out or still try. But, in my mind, I was like, why would I come all the way to Alaska not to try?
So, at about 9:30 p.m., we piled into vans and headed out to chase the Northern Lights. We traveled about an hour and a half from Anchorage, and when we stepped out of the van, it was cold and pitch black. And unfortunately, after a couple of hours in the cold, those clouds in the sky never parted for us. I know that when we see the posts of people who do get to see Mother Nature do her thing, we don’t have all of the context of the science, which is Aurora Borealis.
Sometimes, the weather just doesn’t do what we earthlings would like, which can lead to disappointment. However, our guide did give a recommendation. When you book a trip to see the lights, give yourself four to five days to see them. Don’t bank on one day because, at the end of the day, this is science.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Now, On to the Glacier!
Just six hours after returning from the Northern Lights tour, we were up for the glacier tour because they were back-to-back! I was exhausted and so excited. If someone had told me I’d hike on a glacier, I would have given them a mean side-eye. I mean, where on earth does one climb a glacier? Let me share a few destinations with you, just in case you want to plan an icy adventure: Switzerland, Norway, Iceland, Chile, Argentina, and Alaska.
Aside from the fact the Matanuska Glacier is 22,000 years old, it’s the largest glacier accessible by car in the United States—27 miles long and four miles wide, making it one of the easier ones to see IRL. As a girlie with generalized anxiety disorder, I get anxious about doing this kind of thing because I know that to see these world wonders is usually a mountainous trek.
This one was two hours long, one-way, up snow-capped, windy, mountainous terrain. However, my therapist always reminds me to push myself to do what scares me (as long as it’s for a reason, of course). I held my breath for the journey there and back! And white-knuckled it from time to time, too.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Once we got there, we were surrounded by fresh, fluffy snow, and it was COLD! In the negative cold. I was thankful, I’d over-prepared. If you even go on a glacier tour, I recommend a few things: Balaclava, heavy-weight gloves, cashmere socks, snow boots, and lots of layers.
Here’s what I wore. My first layer was Ann Taylor leggings and a Wolford Turtleneck. Then, I layered a cashmere turtleneck and cashmere joggers. A COACH down vest, which I’d recommend anyone own just for winter, in general, because it’s SO warm! For my feet, I wore Ann Taylor cashmere socks (I love these because they’re affordable and so warm) and Adidas Adifom Superstar Winter Boot and topped all of that with a Brandon Blackwood ankle-length parka. I know BB is known for his accessories, but the brand’s outwear is truly amazing and worth the investment. After two hours on the ice, I felt great!
If you’re open to adventure travel, I highly recommend putting a glacier tour on your list of things to do. There are a few reasons. First, standing on an ice age-old massive piece of glacier was my 2024 version of touching some grass. I was reminded that I’m a speck on this spinning rock and need to spend more time grounded in that fact as I move through the world. I looked to the sky and thought of how proud my ancestors would be, even though I know they’d be telling me to get my butt home and off a dog on a glacier!
Secondly, I gained an ever-large appreciation for Mother Nature as I learned that glaciers are the world's largest reservoir of freshwater, containing around 69% of the world's freshwater. Again, another fact that helped me gain perspective. Lastly, it’s just fun and stunningly beautiful!
After this, I’m looking forward to my next cold-weather adventure! Iceland and Argentina are at the top of the list!
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Featured image courtesy of Bianca Lambert