Recently, Women In Media gathered in Philadelphia to celebrate us, the present, and the future of media during their annual conference. This included honoring entrepreneur and radio host, Angela Yee, who continues to pave the way for those in the industry with her "hustle hard" mentality.
By the time she got off the stage, it felt as if we had been bonded together as she shared her journey to success. This epic girl talk touched on breakups (only to exemplify resilience and God's timing, of course) and business, and you can't begin to imagine the gems that were dropped.
There were no limits to the helpful advice she spouted out to the women who were present. In the spirit of motivating other women in media or any industry, here are 4 top-notch takeaways from everything that Yee gave us:
Internships Pay Big, Even If It's Not Financially
We grapple with the idea of internships because it's essentially slave labor for the needy. It's yet another social construct developed to help the rich get richer, as they're the only ones who can afford to work for free (with minimal pressure and stress, that is).
Yet, they are what's necessary to get your foot in the door and, in certain industries (journalism/PR/marketing), unpaid internships are far more prevalent than others. That rings especially true in markets like New York City, a place thriving and over-saturated with post-grad potential, where you aren't the only one trying to be the only one.
Also important? Passion and, of course, a desire to be present in this moment of your life despite the struggle.
This is what Yee knew when she quit the paying temp job opening envelopes in a room with no windows and zero room for enthusiasm after only two days. Within the same week, she got two offers after putting in work and sending in resumes, one of which was from Wu-Tang, whom she had interned with during her time in undergrad.
"Even though I didn't get paid for all the internships that I did, I still have relationships at all the places I interned and any of those people, I think, to this day would still hire me because I was so enthusiastic when I went in," the entrepreneur and radio co-host said of the opportunities her internships have presented.
Working for free for a year or so is a small price to pay for the doors that interning can open -- especially when it's something you can do with hope for growth and professional development in the future.
To Angela's point, the undeniable truth is that: "No matter how much money you're making or not making, you have to always go above and beyond, and that's something I've always done."
Consider your time as an intern as a trial period to see if they see longevity in you and vice versa. It's easy to change professions while on the intern level but trying to do so at 45 with a minivan full of kids, although commendable, it's hard as hell.
Trust God's Plan And The Timing Of Everything
When Yee graduated with a degree in English from Wesleyan University in 2000, her ambition was to become a writer. From Wu-Tang to Eminem's clothing line, and through a long string of marketing jobs, Yee continued to make connections in the industry. After being laid off while working with Em's line, Yee inquired about a marketing position at Sirius XM Radio. When Angela stepped into the radio game she had no experience. Writing was her goal, writing was her passion, and writing was her end game. The saying "tell God your plans and watch him laugh" is a major theme in Yee's story and her continued faith has positioned her for the success we see before our eyes. She concluded by adding the importance of remaining open to opportunities and remaining "limitless."
"We have to stop confining ourselves to expectations of 'well, this could never happen' or 'this is a terrible idea.' We have to take a risk because if you don't take a risk, then nothing is going to happen and having nothing happen is worse than trying something that doesn't work."
What's Meant For You Will Be For You But Not Without Work
Much to our surprise, she admits she was awful when she first began radio.
"We should never assume that as soon as we start something we're going to be great at it, you have to know that it's going to take some time to get better."
"I was awful at first. It was hard for me to listen to myself, I didn't tell anybody that I was doing that [radio] because I didn't want anyone to listen, who I knew and be like 'What the hell?' So, it was kind of a secret and little by little people would find out," says Yee.
The self-made go-getter attributes her success to her endless dedication to improve, reminiscing she tells the Women In Media crowd: "I dedicated myself 100 percent to that. I wasn't going out, I was going out listening to my shows figuring out how to get better because I wasn't good at it."
Yee's skills improved immensely and Sirius radio went on to offer her the position on the morning show, and also space to create Lip Service with an opportunity for a night set.
After the doors began to open for Yee, there was no turning back. She went on to get offers from Atlanta, Philly, and soon thereafter I Heart Radio offered her a platform. As the co-host points out, "That's from someone who did not go to school for radio, who never thought I would be a radio personality, I grinded it out and worked hard."
Two Women Are Always Better Than One
Starting a new position requires you making the rounds to find your fellow black crew. Being a woman, we tend to find an additional place amongst our workplace peers of black women. It's one of the best ways we know how to support one another -- by sticking together. However, we've all heard those women who swear they don't enjoy the company of other women. Yee warns against these type of women, stating that she's "really cautious of people [other women] who say 'I don't mess with other girls' because that's an awful attitude to have."
She further elaborates, "We work so much better together and a lot of that attitude comes from people around us."
Sadly, Yee recounts the numerous times she was pitted against women like Melyssa Ford, Miss Info, and Amanda Seales who all worked in the building while she was at Sirius. None of the women were on the same station and were constantly being told not to trust one another. This is, unfortunately, the way of the world. But we know that together, women get shit done!
Although this was delivered to the Women In Media by a woman in media, we know that Angela Yee is so much more than that. She's more than any one title and we have the potential to be, as well. Knowing the grind can present many roadblocks, it can be useful to heed the advice of someone who has already overcome quite a few of the same or similar obstacles.
With that in mind, I hope that some boss babe somewhere sees this and keeps pushing the limits of her faith.
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While speaking to xoNecole, Eva shares that she’s a lot like the beloved 1994 character in many ways. “Lyric is so me. She's the odd flower. A flower nonetheless, but definitely not a peony,” she tells us.
“She's not the average flower you see presented, and so she reminds me of myself. I'm a sunflower, beautiful, but different. And what I loved about her character then, and even more so now, is that she was very sure of herself.
"Sure of what she wanted in life and okay to sacrifice her moments right now, to get what she knew she deserved later. And that is me. I'm not an instant gratification kind of a person. I am a long game. I'm not a sprinter, I'm a marathon.
America first fell in love with Eva when she graced our screens on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model in 2004, which she emerged as the winner. Since then, she's ventured into different avenues, from acting on various TV series like House of Payne to starring on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Je-Caryous Johnson Entertainment
Eva praises her castmates and the play’s producer, Je’Caryous for her positive experience. “You know what? Je’Caryous fuels my audacity car daily, ‘cause I consider myself an extremely audacious woman, and I believe in what I know, even if no one else knows it, because God gave it to me. So I know what I know. That is who Je’Caryous is.”
But the mom of three isn’t the only one in the family who enjoys acting. Eva reveals her daughter Marley has also caught the acting bug.
“It is the most adorable thing you can ever see. She’s got a part in her school play. She's in her chorus, and she loves it,” she says. “I don't know if she loves it, because it's like, mommy does it, so maybe I should do it, but there is something about her.”
Overall, Eva hopes that her contribution to the role and the play as a whole serves as motivation for others to reach for the stars.
“I want them to walk out with hope. I want them to re-vision their dreams. Whatever they were. Whatever they are. To re-see them and then have that thing inside of them say, ‘You know what? I'm going to do that. Whatever dream you put on the back burner, go pick it up.
"Whatever dream you've accomplished, make a new dream, but continue to reach for the stars. Continue to reach for what is beyond what people say we can do, especially as [a] Black collective but especially as Black women. When it comes to us and who we are and what we accept and what we're worth, it's not about having seen it before. It's about knowing that I deserve it.”
This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
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Fortunately, five simple words have simplified my dating process and ushered in clarity faster: “Would my husband do this?”
A couple of years ago, I met an entertainment lawyer who was tonguing down a twenty-something-year-old woman for breakfast while I slurped my green smoothie and chomped on a flatbread sandwich. Okay, Black love, I grinned and thought as I sauntered out of the Joe & The Juice. As soon as I stepped down from the front door, a torrential downpour of Miami summer rain cascaded and throttled me back inside to wait out the storm.
I grabbed a hot green tea and vacillated between peering out the wet door and anxiously checking my watch. My lengthy agenda started with attending the Tabitha Brown and Chance Brown’s “Black Love” panel, and I was already late. That’s when the lawyer introduced himself to me, after he made a joke about neither one of us wanting to get soaked by the rain. His female companion had braved the storm, leaving us to find our commonalities.
We both lived in L.A. and had traveled to the American Black Film Festival to expand our network. He represented various artists, including entertainment writers, while I was working as a writer/creative producer in Hollywood.
While there is no shortage of internet advice on how to strategically meet a prominent man at conferences, if I spend my hard-earned funds on career growth, I have tunnel vision, and that doesn’t include finding Mr. Right. So, I stowed his contact details away as strictly professional.
Keep It Cute Love And Hip Hop GIFGiphyAs the humidity and mosquitoes were rising around L.A., two months later, another suitor-turned-terrible match cooled off after three unimpressive dates and a bevy of red flags. I posted what some of my friends called a thirst trap, but it was really me wearing a black freakum jumpsuit with a plunging neckline to my friend’s 35th birthday soiree despite feeling oh, so unsexy and bloated on my cycle.
I’d been waiting to post a sassy caption and finally had the perfect picture to match: “You not asking for too much, you just asking the wrong MF.”
That’s when the entertainment lawyer swooped into my DMs and asked me to dinner. I was quite confused. Is he asking me on a date? Or is this professional? Common sense would’ve picked the former. Once it clicked that this would in fact be a date, I told my mentor, who’s been happily married for over twenty years and has often been a guiding light and has steered me away from the wrong men.
Upon telling him about how we met, he emphatically stated, “He ain’t it.” He followed up with a simple question, "You have to ask yourself: Would my husband do this? Would you tell others that you met your husband, tonguing down another woman, and later married him?"
Aint It No Way GIF by UFCGiphyOuch. The thought-provoking question cleared any haze. Prior to going out with the lawyer, the first thing I inquired about was the woman.
“You saw that?” He said, taken aback that I’d witnessed his steamy PDA. Surely, anyone with two open eyes peeped him caressing her backside as he kissed her in the middle of the coffee shop.
He brushed her off as a casual someone he’d gone on a couple of dates with but had since stopped talking to. He said he hadn’t been in a serious relationship in over three years. Though I was still doubtful, dating in L.A. is treacherous and ephemeral. Making it past three months is considered a rarity.
With my antennae alert, I dined with him at a cozy beachside steakhouse restaurant where we were serenaded by a live jazz band. I’d emphasized forming a platonic friendship first.
Break Up Friendship GIF by TLCGiphy“I’ll come to you,” he obliged. I liked that he had made me a priority by driving over 50 miles to see me. I also liked the effort he made to check in with me daily. But I still couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that he initiated on a professional pretense and then alley hooped through the back door on a romantic venture, which bombarded me with confusion.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my dating life, God is not the author of confusion; any man who brings confusion, rather than clarity, is simply not The One. It doesn’t matter how many boxes he checks–eventually, that confusion will manifest itself into bigger problems, in time.
After diving into deeper conversations on the phone, post our first dinner date, I quickly realized this man was indeed not The One for me. But I’m grateful for the valuable lesson I learned.
I don’t expect some unattainable fairytale of a husband; we all have our own flaws and conflict is inevitable, but after dating for two decades, through failure and success, I’ve realized that the person I ultimately marry must mirror the values I exert into the world. He must reciprocate kindness, patience, and respect. He must be quick to listen and slow to respond. He needs to be forgiving and trustworthy, practice healthy communication, and be a man of his word at the bare minimum.
If I’d had “Would my husband do this?” in my toolbox when I was dating and floundering in stagnant relationships, in my twenties, it would’ve saved me a lot of precious time. But now that I’m equipped with the reminder, it’s allowed me to ground myself in my non-negotiables and set/maintain the standard for the special person, I’ll one day say, “I do,” to.
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