Ahh, the glow-up. Many of us have a love/hate relationship with this notion. We love the person we become on the other side. But that process? Not for the faint of heart. I recently turned 37 and while it wasn’t a milestone birthday, I realized I’m closer to 40 than 30. I might not ever be the size I was when I first crossed into this decade or return to the woman I was before becoming a mom. But that doesn’t mean I can’t level up and have my own pre-mid-life transformation. And it’s the same for you.
Think about it. It takes 21 days to create a habit, so imagine what you can do in 30 with consistency and commitment to simply being your best self. You deserve that and more.
Whether you want to evolve and learn a new skill or just be proud of the person you are and the decisions you’ve made when the new year makes its entrance, the glow-up is more within your reach than you think. Here are a few ways you can begin the journey.
1.Positive Affirmations Are Top-Tier
“On my mama, on my hood, I look fly, I look good,” is one of the best millennial proverbs to date. The devil is busy, so given even the smallest chance, negativity will find a way to seep into our minds and poison everything we’ve worked so hard to overcome. Speaking positive, motivating thoughts is one of the easiest ways to glow up with a quickness. Write out a few statements that make you feel unstoppable and speak them over yourself daily. Shut down self-doubt and remind yourself that you’re that chick! Becoming your best self will be inevitable.
2.Move, Sis!
FreshSplash/Getty ImagesExercise has proven to help our mental health over and over again. It’s “a mood booster” that “has been scientifically proven to decrease symptoms of anxiety and depression,” licensed mental health counselor Joanne Frederick, L.P.C., told Shape. Simply put, according to Frederick, “Physical activity raises endorphins in the body, which are the brain's feel-good chemicals.”
Still, if you’re like me, the thought of going to the gym five days a week makes you want to faint. So you can start with something fun, like going for a walk while listening to a podcast or taking a virtual or in-person dance class. Either way, exercise is a guaranteed way to glow up from the inside out.
3.Read Something
There’s something about picking up a book (or pressing play on an audiobook in the car or while cleaning up) that just makes us feel like we’re elevating ourselves. *insert shoulder shimmy.* It could be an erotica novel, an empowering memoir, or a book that gives you the ins and outs of how to excel in your trade. Whatever the topic, any book can spark your desire to use your imagination, expand your vocabulary, and inspire you to reflect on your own life story. Most of us love a good TV show binge, but when it comes to leveling up, adding a book or two into our rotation is the chef’s kiss.
4.You Are What You Eat
AleksandarNakic/Getty ImagesCan we discuss food for a minute? Whew. For many of us, it’s our Achilles heel on the journey to glowing up. From emotional eating to jumping into the latest diet fad in every last effort to un-big our backs, it’s easy to fall victim and go from one extreme to the other. But for now, why not just start small, with one thing at a time for 30 days, instead of trying to go cold turkey and switch up everything at once?
Maybe you could commit to eating healthy, whole foods, skip fast food, and opt for meal prepping at the beginning of the week. Or take a break from eating fried foods or over-indulging in beloved sweets. There are so many ways to achieve a healthier lifestyle through our nutrition, and the feeling of having power and control over what we put in our bodies instead of letting it take over us is indescribable.
5.What Are You Looking At?
If you can’t see it, can you really manifest it? Creating vision and mood boards isn’t just for the beginning of the year. Making them all year round will help keep your goals fresh and at the forefront of your mind. Seeing your aspirations in bright colors, motivating images, and uplifting phrases will inspire you to do what it takes to stay on your journey to a better, and ultimately the best, version of yourself. You can create one for a specific goal or a generic one for multiple areas of your life. If you really want to get into it, put your board in a place where you can’t avoid it — in your bathroom, bedroom, living room, etc., letting it serve as a reminder that your evolution isn’t out of reach.
6.Sleep On It
Getty ImagesTeam No Sleep is not my testimony. If taking naps was a love language, it would be mine. And I’m not ashamed… anymore. Getting enough sleep is imperative to becoming your best self. Have you noticed that more celebrities are bragging about how much sleep they actually get? From Angela White (aka Blac Chyna) sharing that she gets 8-9 hours of sleep a day, to Oprah Winfrey’s Oprah Dailyrevealing her two favorite places are the bathtub and her bed.
This whole idea of grinding day and night just isn’t as noble as it used to be. From reducing stress, boosting your memory and energy, rejuvenating your body, and giving your heart some TLC, there are several benefits of getting a solid night's sleep, per Very Well Health. The traditional 7-9 hours of sleep each night might not be realistic for you. If that’s the case, quality over quantity is key. Either way, go to bed, girl!
7.Don’t Be Thirsty
We take pride in drinking our water and minding our business. But there are some serious benefits to staying hydrated. Via Byrdie, board-certified dermatologist Margarita Lolis notes that the Mayo Clinic recommends women drink 2.7 liters a day, that’s about 92 oz. With this magic number, you could start to see: a boost in your metabolism, improved endurance in your workouts, glowing skin, healthier eating habits, and better brain function.
Though cramping could also be a factor, that can be subsided by discovering how much water is best for your physique. Don’t let that discourage you from increasing your water intake if needed because it’s the key to literally glowing up your skin and body.
8.The Great Purge
Rockaa/Getty ImagesOut with the old, in with the new, right? Purging things from your closet to cleaning out your car makes room for the beautiful and new things to come into your life. A new season like spring or fall has been touted as the perfect time in the past, but is there any better moment than the present? From schedules and old sweaters, worries and plans about the future, and tasks like laundry (which is in a class of its own), our minds are just so…cluttered.
The first step to clearing it out could be cleaning out things that no longer serve you. Taking a couple of times a week to purge various places of your life can put you in the mental space to manifest and prepare for the person you’ve been aiming to become. A clean area can lead to more productivity, confidence, and a free mind, which is a game changer in leveling up.
9.Try Something New
One thing I love about stepping into a new era is that it’s never too late to evolve and try new things. As you go through this process, start thinking of ways to actually enjoy it. What sets your heart on fire that you have yet to tap into? What’s something you’ve always dreamed of doing but have been too afraid, busy, or unmotivated to try? With technology, virtual learning, good old YouTube University, and the #TikTokTaughtMe concept, you can literally master anything with time.
Whether you want to travel to expand your horizon and mind, challenge yourself by learning how to cook, or start embracing the great outdoors by going on a hike, taking on new adventures will undoubtedly add fuel to your journey, inspiring you to stick it out when things feel mundane.
10.Stay Consistent
Anchiy/Getty ImagesCan you relate to the shame that comes with starting over while pursuing the same goal? We get a plan, start off super motivated and inspired, ready to flawlessly knock it out within X amount of days…only to fall off. I’ve kept promises to other people, but when it comes to myself, I can justify dropping the ball. If we’ve learned anything in our journey to a glow-up, it’s that consistency is key.
Keep showing up for yourself because you deserve to become the woman you’ve always wanted to be. It’s going to take sacrifice, dedication, and commitment. Bottom line, it’ll be hard. But if you take it one day at a time and keep your promises to yourself, you’ll get there and be so proud of yourself when you do.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image by Westend61/Getty Images
RELATED
It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Alistair Berg/Getty ImagesStep 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Getty ImagesStep 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
DMP/ Getty ImagesStep 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
Featured image by zamrznutitonovi/Getty Images
However, to my surprise, I received an email that read: “It’s with great excitement that we announce your film, Super High: A Period Piece, has been selected for the 24th Anchorage International Film Festival.” After looking at the flight distance from Atlanta to Anchorage—a solid 10 hours one way— I’d decided this would be one I wouldn’t attend.
That was until there was a follow-up email that shared that the festival was sponsoring two excursions for filmmakers: A Northern Lights Tour and A Glacier Hike.
With that, I knew I had to make the trip to the 49th state! I flew Delta, which offered the shortest layovers—just 50 minutes each way. For a more comfortable flight on the longer legs that were about six hours between my layover city and Anchorage, I upgraded to first class with an in-app discount for $256 (the regular price of a first-class ticket runs about $2,100), which was so worth it for additional space and service for the six-hour trek.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
"So What’s Alaska Like? Did You Have To Wear a Snowsuit? What’s the Food Like?"
These are among the major questions I’ve gotten. Anchorage reminds me less of a bustling major city and more of a small town with an easygoing feel. When I arrived, they’d just had snow a few days before, so it was cold, and the streets were slick. So, I was so happy I’d invested in a pair of snow boots. For my first few days, the locals said it was warm. Warm to them being 20s at night and mid-30s during the day.
However, by the time I left, fresh snow was on the ground, and temps were well into the single digits—and it felt like it. Oh, the sun doesn’t rise until 10:30 a.m., and it sets around 4 p.m. That was among the most challenging things to experience because I felt like I never really woke up. So, between the lack of sun and the four-hour time difference, I felt tired the whole time I was there.
As for food, I didn’t explore a ton because I was so cold. But I found two gems! First was Whiskey and Ramen. If you enjoy ramen and exceptional service, this is a must-visit. I’d make a trip back just for their Wagyu ramen and their special take on an old fashion!
And, for coffee, I thoroughly enjoyed That Feeling Co. The coffee was great, and being surrounded by plants helped to perk up my spirits.
The Northern Lights
Iceland is one of the most popular places to see the Northern Lights, so I was very excited to know that Alaska also gets to see the Aurora Borealis light show. Typically, many people visit Fairbanks to see them, but there are tours offered in Anchorage too! When prepping for the late-night tour, we’d heard that the night we were heading out to see the lights, the cloud coverage likely meant we wouldn’t be able to see them. Bummer. I know. So, we could sit the tour out or still try. But, in my mind, I was like, why would I come all the way to Alaska not to try?
So, at about 9:30 p.m., we piled into vans and headed out to chase the Northern Lights. We traveled about an hour and a half from Anchorage, and when we stepped out of the van, it was cold and pitch black. And unfortunately, after a couple of hours in the cold, those clouds in the sky never parted for us. I know that when we see the posts of people who do get to see Mother Nature do her thing, we don’t have all of the context of the science, which is Aurora Borealis.
Sometimes, the weather just doesn’t do what we earthlings would like, which can lead to disappointment. However, our guide did give a recommendation. When you book a trip to see the lights, give yourself four to five days to see them. Don’t bank on one day because, at the end of the day, this is science.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Now, On to the Glacier!
Just six hours after returning from the Northern Lights tour, we were up for the glacier tour because they were back-to-back! I was exhausted and so excited. If someone had told me I’d hike on a glacier, I would have given them a mean side-eye. I mean, where on earth does one climb a glacier? Let me share a few destinations with you, just in case you want to plan an icy adventure: Switzerland, Norway, Iceland, Chile, Argentina, and Alaska.
Aside from the fact the Matanuska Glacier is 22,000 years old, it’s the largest glacier accessible by car in the United States—27 miles long and four miles wide, making it one of the easier ones to see IRL. As a girlie with generalized anxiety disorder, I get anxious about doing this kind of thing because I know that to see these world wonders is usually a mountainous trek.
This one was two hours long, one-way, up snow-capped, windy, mountainous terrain. However, my therapist always reminds me to push myself to do what scares me (as long as it’s for a reason, of course). I held my breath for the journey there and back! And white-knuckled it from time to time, too.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Once we got there, we were surrounded by fresh, fluffy snow, and it was COLD! In the negative cold. I was thankful, I’d over-prepared. If you even go on a glacier tour, I recommend a few things: Balaclava, heavy-weight gloves, cashmere socks, snow boots, and lots of layers.
Here’s what I wore. My first layer was Ann Taylor leggings and a Wolford Turtleneck. Then, I layered a cashmere turtleneck and cashmere joggers. A COACH down vest, which I’d recommend anyone own just for winter, in general, because it’s SO warm! For my feet, I wore Ann Taylor cashmere socks (I love these because they’re affordable and so warm) and Adidas Adifom Superstar Winter Boot and topped all of that with a Brandon Blackwood ankle-length parka. I know BB is known for his accessories, but the brand’s outwear is truly amazing and worth the investment. After two hours on the ice, I felt great!
If you’re open to adventure travel, I highly recommend putting a glacier tour on your list of things to do. There are a few reasons. First, standing on an ice age-old massive piece of glacier was my 2024 version of touching some grass. I was reminded that I’m a speck on this spinning rock and need to spend more time grounded in that fact as I move through the world. I looked to the sky and thought of how proud my ancestors would be, even though I know they’d be telling me to get my butt home and off a dog on a glacier!
Secondly, I gained an ever-large appreciation for Mother Nature as I learned that glaciers are the world's largest reservoir of freshwater, containing around 69% of the world's freshwater. Again, another fact that helped me gain perspective. Lastly, it’s just fun and stunningly beautiful!
After this, I’m looking forward to my next cold-weather adventure! Iceland and Argentina are at the top of the list!
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
Featured image courtesy of Bianca Lambert