What Happened When 3 Black Girl Travelers Journeyed To South Africa On A $200 Glitch
Many of us dream of going back to the Motherland and having the opportunity to embrace our cultural roots and to see the REAL Africa, not just the carefully curated images that the media feeds us. For three travelers, a trip to the South Africa was available right at their fingertips for less than a fraction of the normal cost.
It was early Christmas morning when a few lucky travelers scrolled through their Twitter feeds and opened their first present: A flight to Johannesburg for less than $200. Although there were other discounted destinations to travel to such as Abu Dhabi and Hong Kong, they couldn't pass up the opportunity to embrace their inner travelistas and jetset to the home of Nelson Mandela.
"At first I was like okay cool Abu Dhabi, since everybody else is getting that one. Then I was like Johannesburg is on my list of places to go," says Natelegé Whaley, a native New Yorker with a passion for travel.
The ladies hopped on their respective flights with Etihad Airways and flew to Abu Dhabi before taking the final nine-hour leg to Johannesburg, but that didn't stop them from hitting the ground running as soon as they landed. With so much activity and culture to take in, it's no wonder that they didn't hit the sheets before exploring the streets! And for those who decided to venture to Cape Town, it was less than a two-hour flight from Johannesburg for around $100.
If you're looking to explore Cape Town and Johannesburg in the near future, don't worry, we've got you covered! We spoke to three ladies who dished out the goods on things to do, what to eat, and where to stay to make the most of your South African experience.
Meet the Globetrotters:
How did you hear about the travel glitch?
Natelegé: So it was Christmas, It was really early in the morning. I had the day off, and I was just up. I'm not always on Twitter so I was just scrolling and I follow Travel Noire, and that's how I saw it. So I saw them re-tweeting people saying they got this trip to Abu Dhabi. So I ignored it, at first, but then I kept seeing it. So I checked it out and it was actually posted on Flightdeals.com, they pretty much had laid out all of the information about how to get it and what website to go to. So I saw it was also one for Johannesburg and there was also some Asian countries. So at first I was like okay cool Abu Dhabi, since everybody else is getting that one. Then I was like Johannesburg is on my list of places to go. So I called my friend, and it was $187 round trip.
Erica: I actually woke up in the middle of the night because I had a crazy dream about Jay-Z and Beyoncé (laughs). So I couldn't go back to sleep, and I started scrolling through Twitter I follow Travel Noire and The Flight Deal and all the different travel bloggers and travel websites, and they were re-tweeting all of these people that were saying that they got a trip to Johannesburg for $178. And I was like, is this real? And then I went to Instagram and I was seeing the same thing. One of the blogs I follow is Rachel Travels and she posted her invoice from where she had gotten the ticket. So I ran downstairs and got my computer and went online and found out it was true.
Tiffany: I just happen to wake up on Christmas and I checked Twitter and I kept seeing a bunch of people say well I'm going to Abu Dhabi for $150, so I said really, what's that all about? And the travel site Travel Noire said if you missed it here it is, it's a big glitch. So I was looking and I'm like Abu Dhabi's nice, Hong Kong ok, but they have one to Johannesburg. And for some reason Johannesburg jumped out to me. So I struggled with it for an hour. I started bouncing ideas off like who am I going to invite, and I eventually said I'm just going to get a ticket and go by myself.
How did you go about planning the trip?
Natelegé: I didn't go until May, so I still had about five months. My friend and I went through Airbnb and got a condo in this new building, and it was pretty cheap. Between her and I we only paid $200 for four nights [in Johannesburg]. And then we went to Cape Town and we stayed there for two nights, which was a little more expensive, but it was still good. I only paid $100 for those two nights.
Erica: Me and my mom went April 15th – 23rd. I travel a lot so I'm used to planning, but I was kind of slack because I was going to Iceland before I went to Africa, so I didn't plan probably until a month and a half before we were to go. I knew we didn't want to stay in Johannesburg the whole time because it's more like a city, so I wanted to feel like I was in Africa. So we went to Johannesburg for a day and then we spent the rest of the time in Cape Town. In Cape Town, we stayed at a really nice hotel down on the waterfront called the Southern Sun.
Tiffany: Travel Noire was super helpful. They had this spreadsheet for everyone who cashed in on the glitch to post where you're going, what time, etc. So I put my information in. I was going in between my birthday. And I just happen to meet another person on there who was going around the same time. So the way that we set it up was we would have these meet-ups, and then she recommended this Facebook group, and it's another thing that helped me to not feel so afraid to go because I was going by myself and it was something that I'd never done before. As far as planning I did the Airbnb, so I stayed with a super sweet host family. They recommended places for me to eat, places for me to go, they even invited me to a dinner party the next night for a couple of their friends that had gotten engaged. The woman that was getting engaged was a food blogger, so when she found out that I was going to Cape Town she gave me a long list of places I had to eat while I was down there. So once I got down there, the host family helped me to plan my time while I was down there, and then as I went to Cape Town, and I booked a hotel that was near the beach.
Guest house Tiffany stayed in while in Johannesburg
What was your first impression of South Africa?
Natelegé: When we got into the area we stayed, it's an area where they are building up these condos. And a few blocks away, there were people squatting in old abandoned office buildings. When we did get there and we were driving up to the building we were passing some areas that looked really questionable. We were like. is everything okay over here? And then we pulled up to the building we were staying in and it was white people sitting having dinner at the restaurant and I was like, what's going on here?" I question these things anywhere I go, just how the poverty lines are, even Africa, look who's doing well. So I was excited to be in the Motherland, but it was kind of overwhelming.
Tiffany: I know it sounds cliché but it was amazing to be there, like Nelson Mandela was on all of the local currency, which I think is a super powerful statement. I don't know…it felt like I had went home. Everyone saw me like “oh my sister, my sister" but they genuinely meant it. And it just felt like I was amongst family. Flying into Cape Town was beautiful because you really feel like you're at the end of the Earth, I guess because of the ocean and the water, but you also see a lot of townships, which is a nice term to say ghetto. So you see that flying in as well.
What activities did you do while you were there?
Natelegé: The night we arrived we went to a jazz club. A friend of a friend connected us with this musician, so he invited us out. Literally as soon as we got there we changed our clothes and went out—it was called The Orbit, and it was cool, we had dinner, we had wine, everything was super cheap. The next day we stayed local and just walked around Maubane because there's a lot of stuff to do over there and they have a lot of restaurants, art galleries and little boutiques. The following day we got on a Red Bus Tour and we went around Johannesburg, and then there was a second tour part to it where you got off in Soweto and went to a museum, and then we walked to Mandela's family house—the first house he lived in with his family and it's a museum now. Later we met up with the musician friend in a part called Marshalltown, which is more in the city. We went to some bars—Johannesburg's clubs are open until 4AM, so we went into this lounge and it was more of a younger scene. And then we got up early the next morning and went to Cape Town, and as soon as we got into Cape Town we went to Table Mountain. The last day we got on a boat and went to the island where Mandela was in prison [Robben Island].
Erica: In Johannesburg, we only really got to go around and see a little bit and then we went to Mandela Square. The majority of the time was spent in Cape Town. We went on the Table Mountain tour the first morning we were there and that was like half a day and then we went on a winery tour that afternoon. That was a private tour so it was just us, which was really nice. We also went to Robben Island.
Tiffany: I mostly just ate food and did as much sightseeing as I could. In Johannesburg I stayed in this town called Melville, which is basically like it's one of their up-and-coming cities. They kind of describe it as a hipster city, so I was kind of around there a lot. I didn't travel too far out of Johannesburg, but I did hang out with the locals. The guy at the café knew who I was after the first day, so it kind of treated me like I had been living there or just moved. In Cape Town I did pretty much the same thing. I went to a place called the Old Biscuit Mill, which is a very popular place to go on Saturday mornings especially. They have an open market and they have vendors that sell food, and jewelry and clothes, and live music. And then that Sunday I went zip-lining in Table Mountain.
Erica and mom at the Cape of Good Hope.
So what about the local food?
Natelegé: Johannesburg is so capitalized. That city has everything that we have here. It's kind of hard to find traditional South African food. I did have Ostrich. I also had something like Shepherd's Pie but it had some sort of game in it. A lot of what we ate was good! All the food I ate tasted good. Even if it was non-South African, it was still good. I think I had fish and greens, and I don't think I paid more than $10 for it. I felt like I was in a normal restaurant. In New York I would pay $15 or $20 dollars. We probably spent $20 dollars total.
Erica: Oh yes! We ate a lot because I love the food, so I wanted to try a lot of difference things. We stayed by the waterfront in Cape Town, but we ate at a lot of restaurants near the waterfront. The first night we went to a place that was known for South African food. And I had some type of curry chicken. Whatever I had it was good. We also went to an ostrich farm while we were there, and I actually did eat ostrich twice: I had ostrich burger and I had an ostrich filet, like a filet mignon and it was really good. It tasted kind of like bison to me. It was a little gamey, but it was good. Since it's a bird I thought it would taste more like chicken, but it was more beef like.
Tiffany: In Cape Town yes, I believe I did. Their specialty was grilled ostrich, so I actually had grilled ostrich my first night in Cape Town. It's like a red meat, but it was really, really good. The next night I went to the The Test Kitchen. It's a French type of restaurant, but it was revered as one of the best restaurants in the word. That food was really good.
Natelegé and friend visit the Soweto township to see Mandela's house.
Going there, did you feel like you were in Africa?
Natalegé: I definitely felt like I was in Africa, only because it gives a different feel, when I had to leave I was getting sad because it felt like I didn't even scratch the surface of both cities. I also felt like I wanted to get to know our people more. And see what they thought about what it means to be South African. The thing about South Africa is that it's a lot of people who moved there from other parts of the continent. I met people that came from Ghana, and Nigeria, Malawi—all other parts. It's like how everyone wants to move to New York, everyone there wants to move to Johannesburg. Because that is where opportunity is.
Erica: In Johannesburg, even though it was more city-like, there were more black people. When we were in Cape Town we saw hardly any black people at all. The hotel workers, they were black. But as far as the tour we went on, we were the only black people. There were a lot of Australians because the Queen Mary cruise ships. But even still we didn't see any black people until we went in to the city of Cape Town to go to the market. Cape Town was very diverse. There are white South Africans, there are a lot of Indonesians—so there were a lot of different people there, which is good, but you won't really feel like you're in Africa if you stay by the waterfront and in the nicer parts of Cape Town. So yeah if you want the more African experience you'd have to stay more in the city center and in Johannesburg.
Were there any memories that stood out to you?
Natelegé: Cape Town was like Miami Beach or Venice Beach. It's by the water so its way more laid back, its way more chill. You could see where development was happening. Apparently nothing is open in the area we were at on a Sunday nigh, and we were staying in Green Market Square. We went into the hotel and they were like there's really nothing open over here. And we walked and found KFC was open. We ran to the corner store at one point to get drinks and this guy had Tupac blasting from his phone. And it was like I was back in Brooklyn.
Erica: There wasn't a lot of talk about apartheid and all of that except for one of our tour guides, he was Indonesian and the morning that we did the tour to Table Mountain we did a city tour too so we went to like one of the museums and we went through the cities and he was telling us about the different buildings and all of that and you could tell that he was passionate about talking about apartheid because he grew up in it and he was a part of the fight. He said he was a part of a protest where he had a rubber bullet shot at him and rocks thrown at him, so he would bring it back to the racial part of it but the people on the tour no one cared because they were from Australia so they could care less so it was interesting to me. That was very weird because I knew that Cape Town was diverse, but I didn't expect it to be like that
Tiffany's host family: Kathleen and her husband, Joey.
Tiffany: I think the biggest thing for me was the host family when they had the engagement party. [My host] remembered it was my birthday, so she went out and got me a cake and was like we are having dinner, come on, come through. She works in this women's organization so she's real powerful feminist. And it was interesting to talk to her about world events. They knew about Michael Brown and Freddie Gray, and they knew a lot about what was going on in America, and I kind of felt bad that I didn't know anything past apartheid in South Africa. So I didn't understand how their lives had changed post Apartheid because it wasn't that long ago. But just being around them and hearing their love stories, how they met, it just felt like being old friends. And I really enjoyed that part of it. Like I never wanted to go to Johannesburg or Cape Town and be like a tourist and stick out. I always kind of wanted to blend in with what people are doing and I felt like I was able to do that.
Did it make you want to travel more? Are there any more cool trips that you're taking this year?
Natelegé: I plan on going back next year and staying maybe two months. I met this blogger out there and he has his own website. I feel like there's more people out there like him, and I want to meet those people and immerse myself more with what's going on out there, and find a way to connect people here to there just so when you want to go to Johannesburg or an anyone wants to go there I can say I know people there. I definitely want to go back there and other parts of Africa down the line.
Erica: I just went to Aruba last month. This weekend I'm going to Belize, and I'm going to Dubai in October. So that's my next big trip. I'd also like to do Portugal and Morocco.
Tiffany: My next destination I hope to go to Thailand or to Marrakech, Morocco. I knew once I did this it was no going back for me. I want to be able to travel more because my biggest hang up was that I couldn't do it because I couldn't afford it, and I couldn't take the time off of work. And I was able to do both. So for me the trip was a no more excuses kind of trip.
Inquiring minds want to know, how do you find all of these travel glitches?
Erica: I follow all of the travel sites on Twitter and Instagram. So, I follow The Flight Deal, Travel Noire, Secret Flyer, and Airfare Watchdog. And I follow a lot of travel bloggers.
Tiffany: I follow The Flight Deal on Twitter, and I'm definitely a part of the Travel Noire District, so anything Travel Noire I'm paying attention.
Originally published August 29, 2016
Featured image by Shutterstock
'We Had To Heal To Love': Taja Simpson And Ryan Easter’s Journey To Lasting Love
How We Met is a series where xoNecole talks love and relationships with real-life couples. We learn how they met, how like turned into love, and how they make their love work.
One of my favorite things about interviewing married couples and hearing their diverse “How We Met” stories is the way they affirm true love and integral beliefs. One principle that I wholeheartedly believe is that one must truly know and love oneself before effectively doing it for another human being, and Taja Simpson and Ryan Easter’s story affirms this.
Taja, an actress known most for her role on BET’s The Oval, and businessman/model Ryan Easter tied the knot on July 27 in an intimate and beautiful wedding in LA - surrounded by friends and family. During our 40+ minute conversation, the newlyweds opened up about the inner work journey they both went through individually to become their best selves.
Taja revealed that her grateful and light spirit came after being in a depressive state and doing a great deal of healing and education. And Ryan shared how losing a parent as a youth affected how he showed up in the world and the truths he had to face to embrace who he is wholly.
The pair also chatted about the power of intention, the importance of working through trauma, and the work they do every day to honor their partnership. There’s a reason their glow is so beautiful! It comes from the inside.
“You're meeting me now after I've done all this work, but I had to go through it to get to that space and be in a very happy, healed relationship,” Taja says. Check out the layered conversation below.
xoNecole: I’ll start with the most obvious question: how did you two meet, and what were your initial feelings about each other?
Ryan Easter: We connected through friends. At the time, I was in New York, and she was back and forth between LA and Atlanta. But our mutual female friends were together and decided they needed to set me up. So they confirmed I was looking for something serious and then sent me her picture.
And I was like, "Okay, she looks good - a chocolate drop." But then I thought, "What's wrong with her? So, I called them up, and one of them was messing with me and said, "Oh, she's a little crazy." I was like, "Whoa, I can't do crazy anymore. I've dealt with that before. I’d rather stay by myself than deal with that again." Then she clarified, "No, I'm just kidding. She's crazy in a good way. She's a lot of fun and has her stuff together. That’s how it started for me.
Taja Simpson: I was just going about my life, getting ready for another season of The Oval, when I got a text from my friend Natasha. She said, "Hey, I don't think you're dating anybody, but I have a friend I think you should meet. He's a great guy." She gave me this huge pedigree, saying they had been friends for 19 years. I thought, "Wow, he sounds amazing." But when she sent me a photo, I didn’t like it.
Later, I thought about it and figured it could just not be a good picture. So she sent his Instagram which had all these modeling fitness pictures and stuff. And then I was like, wow - you had my whole husband this time and didn’t tell me - now I told her she could give him my number.
"I was just going about my life, getting ready for another season of The Oval, when I got a text from my friend Natasha. She said, "Hey, I don't think you're dating anybody, but I have a friend I think you should meet. He's a great guy." She gave me this huge pedigree, saying they had been friends for 19 years. I thought, "Wow, he sounds amazing." But when she sent me a photo, I didn’t like it."
Taja Simpson & Ryan Easter
Photo by @jorgemezaphotos
xoN: I love that because, you know, there's all these conversations about the ways people meet, and I still feel like friends and family are one of the best ways. It’s like they know you! What are your thoughts?
Ryan: Yeah, absolutely! You feel a great sense of obligation to be the best version of yourself because you’re not just representing yourself; you’re also representing the person who referred you. I can’t go out there acting like a fool and have them looking at their friend like, "Why did you hook me up with this clown?" It’s like, we're gonna be clear and honest about our intentions. And if it works, great, and if it doesn't, it's okay.
Taja: Exactly. When he called, we spoke that day for like, an hour. The rest was history. We just connected, and it was great. After that, we started talking every day, and now here we are.
xoN: Okay, so tell me about your first date! Do you remember where you went? What did you do? How was the vibe?
Taja: Our first in-person date was two months after we met over the phone. This was during COVID, so we got introduced in July 2020 but didn’t meet until September. From July to September, we were doing video dates and phone calls, building up this excitement about meeting in person. I was really nervous. I thought, "Oh my God, is it going to be like it was over the phone?" We really connected and vibed. I was there to pick him up at LAX, and I felt like this was it. I thought, "God put this brother in my life to be this good, this perfect." It felt too good to be true.
I actually had a friend meet us at the airport to film our meeting without him knowing. I told her to stay in the corner and keep the camera hidden. When he was coming down the escalator, I had this whole plan to run up to him in slow motion and jump into his arms. When I saw him, I froze. I was so nervous that I couldn’t move! He came up to me, gave me a big hug, and swung me around, and I just thought, "Wow!" Everything I planned went out the window.
Ryan: I was really excited to meet her, too. Technically, our first date was at Firestone Brewery. After the airport, we went back to her place to drop off my stuff, and then she said, "I like to drink beer," so she took me to a brewery nearby.
I remember being there, and we were kind of embracing, but not too much since it was technically the first time we were in physical proximity. You still have to play it cool, even after talking for a while. But every time I touched her, it felt good. I thought, "Yeah, this is it." When we hugged at the airport, I felt like, "Yo, this is home." At that moment, I knew she was the one.
xoN: Ugh, I love that. So when did the courtship start to develop into a relationship? Did y'all have that conversation?
Ryan: Initially, we were very clear about our intentions. We were both dating with purpose and had similar aspirations of eventually finding someone to marry, start a family, create businesses together, and live our lives to the fullest. We knew from the beginning that this was our goal and checked in with each other to see if we were on the same page.
After establishing our intentions, it was about having those small conversations. We discussed what was important to each of us—our needs, wants, likes, dislikes, triggers, and traumas. All those details are crucial for building a solid foundation for a healthy relationship. We spent a lot of time getting to know the real person, not just the representative we might present to the world.
Sometimes, it’s difficult because it requires us to be extremely vulnerable. For men, especially in our society, vulnerability is often frowned upon, making it hard to expose that sensitive side. You never know how people will react—some might use it against you, while others might protect you.
I think for her; it took her understanding that mentality that men have and use that to her advantage to make sure she's like, look, this is a safe space for you to allow me to see the full person that you are. I appreciated that because, like, I would tell her, if you really want a man to value you, he has to feel safe with you, right, not necessarily in a physical capacity but more so from an emotional standpoint; I need to feel like I can be safe with you emotionally.
So that courtship was a lot of just having those serious, sometimes difficult conversations about things we're going through in the past to things we aspire to accomplish in the future, to things that we're currently dealing with, and started to gain that understanding about who we are and what we aspire to be, and just continue to flow.
"So that courtship was a lot of just having those serious, sometimes difficult conversations about things we're going through in the past to things we aspire to accomplish in the future, to things that we're currently dealing with, and started to gain that understanding about who we are and what we aspire to be, and just continue to flow."
Taja: I mean, that's exactly right, and a lot of it we spoke about even before we met. Because it was this free thing where we didn’t know each other. We didn't have to be a representative. I was just my authentic self. It’s like - I'm an actor, and I got five or six characters that may come out in our conversation. I'll be funny, then the next moment, I'll be serious. It just happens.
I was very vocal about how I foresee my life going. Also, because I'm in entertainment, that played a part. I had met people before who couldn't handle that. They wanted a woman with a nine-to-five, a teacher, or just somebody with a very strict schedule. But that wasn't me. So I think we were super intentional when it came to dating and making sure we can build and grow together. So, we made that commitment prior to him leaving. He came to LA for a week, and the day before he left, it was like, okay, so this is it.
xoN: I’ve noticed that intention and vulnerability are both powerful words that you two keep using, which I think is essential for any long-term relationship. What are some of your other shared values?
Ryan: Also, we both understood the power of mindset. When you see successful or unsuccessful people, sometimes others will attribute their state to their family or money. And I'm not saying that that doesn't help. But there are a lot of people who have come from very humble beginnings and very troubled past that have gone on to do great things, and it all had to do with their mindset. They had to leave and see themselves doing what they desired to do before it became a reality in the physical realm.
I think a lot of those beliefs and mentalities that we shared was refreshing because, you know, we've all known people that every time you talk to them, something bad is going on. And it's such a drag because they can bring your energy down. We don't subscribe to that. Not saying that we don't go through tough times. But when we do, the question that we always ask ourselves is, what is it that I'm supposed to learn from this? I think those type of elements of just being in alignment mentally about how we view the world definitely help to solidify our relationship and our connection.
Taja: When we met, I was in a headspace of growth. We now call it believe, evolve, become because you have to believe that thing right in order to show up. We both understand that your vibration precedes your manifestation, so you have to vibrate and believe at a certain level. Act as if you have to be in that space, that energy, in order for that thing to come so you can evolve and then become whatever that said thing is. But I was in that headspace before we met, and I was clearing out people in my life.
I was really intentional with finding someone that was in that headspace, too. I was not okay with anyone being stagnant.
Taja Simpson & Ryan Easter
Photo by @jorgemezaphotos
xoN: You two seem so evolved individually and collectively. I'm curious, were there any challenges that you two had to get through together, and what did you learn from that experience?
Ryan: Being parents. And if your partner doesn't have a great pregnancy, then it can be tough, and it stretches you in a lot of ways. But I would definitely say the first five months of being new parents was a lot because we were both exhausted. And she's also trying to heal her body because giving birth puts a tremendous amount of stress on the woman's body. It gives you a different respect for the strength of femininity because I wouldn't want to go through that. And I was there the whole 29 hours.
So during that time I'm getting snappy because I need to rest. I have not been able to rest, and I'm sleep-deprived, and I don't feel like I got my foot in yet. And, and then, on top of that, you have this, this really small human that's completely dependent upon you. They can't do anything for himself, and that, even psychologically, that's a lot to carry. But the thing that I think that has helped us is that we understand that we won't always be on the same page. It's okay to have disagreements, but you always have to lead with love, meaning that if I'm upset with her or she's upset with me, we focus on what the issue is.
Taja: I had a horrible pregnancy and was still feeling like I want to be productive; it’s just part of who I am. And during the newborn phase, like he said, we were exhausted. We were zombies. I'm getting whiny. I need sleep. He's getting snappy and short, and we're having to figure out us. The hardest thing is trying to still learn how to effectively communicate in the midst of this space where you are exhausted; you don't feel good, nothing's going your way.
But I'm a big believer of being accountable, especially for women, because women are not always accountable. But we encourage each other to address the trauma and encourage positive self-thought and talk. Because what you think, speak, and do creates power for better and worse.
xoN: Were there any past traumas you had to heal from in order to love each other correctly, and do you feel comfortable discussing them?
Ryan: For me, the biggest thing was my father’s death at nine. You’re young, and you don’t know how to process the loss. It’s one of those things I thought I dealt with, but when I got into my adult years, I realized it didn’t. I always felt like I had to go above and beyond because I didn’t have my father there to be a man - I excelled in sports and academics, but it was based on an inadequate feeling.
I understand the importance of fathers in children’s life but you still have the power to be the best version of yourself whether your father is there or not. And I believe the almighty Creator will put people in your life to be the best version of yourself. I wanted to be that confident person for her and our children - and I didn’t want to carry that trauma into our relationship or our son. So I worked on it before us and I continue to now.
Taja: Mine was colorism. I grew up where the brown paper bag thing was a thing. There were kids I couldn’t play with because “I was too Black.” I had a family member who called me “Ew.” Like she’d literally say, come here, Ew, you ugly thing. And my family, for a long time, didn’t realize how it was breaking me. But eventually, my mom noticed and taught me more about self-esteem and then I started to do the work. But it still shows its head. I still would have thoughts that I’m not good enough because of how I look. I’ve literally not tried out for roles because of that. One of my friends’ friends has literally called out once that I was the only dark person at an event.
So when I started doing the work, I noticed the ways it showed up, like I just wouldn’t want to be in the sun long. I mean when I was younger, I used to pray to God to make me “better” or lighter. It took a long time to really get over that. There’s a book I wrote called Women Who Shine - where I got my thoughts out about this.
So he knows my sensitive spots and speaks to the little girl in me. It's so interesting how the things we go through when we’re young affect us in adulthood. Mental health is as important as physical health - and I’m grateful that he understands the importance of both of those.
xoN: Thank you for your vulnerability. I hope it helps someone else. Finally, I’ll close with this: what’s your favorite thing about each other?
Ryan: Definitely her mindset. She doesn’t have a victim mindset; she’s empowered. That’s so attractive. I believe that she prides herself on being a good, great communicator. She moves with integrity, you know, I think that's important. And you know, she also understands the importance of taking care of her physical, emotional, and mental wellbeing.
Taja: There’s so many. Where do I start? My husband is supremely supportive. I absolutely love that about him. Also, I love his intention. I love how effectively he communicates. I love how he fathers our child. I love how he looks. Because, praise God. Okay, I'm just gonna put that out there.
But you know what, my favorite thing about him is that I love that he's a man of integrity.
Integrity was the highest things on my list when I’d write out what I wanted in a partner. Because it’s everything. And so I love that I feel the level of safety that I feel with him, that I can completely be my 100% authentic self. I know that he's taking care of me, my heart, and our family. We're good.
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Many of us love a real-life love story, and Rihanna and A$AP Rocky's journey to partnership is one of patience and true friendship. The stylish couple have been friends for years and even collaborated together on Rih's song "Cockiness (Love It)" remix in 2012.
The following year, the singer starred in Rocky's music video "Fashion Killa." However, the artists didn't officially start dating until a decade later. Now, they both share two kids together, RZA and Riot.
In her May 2022 Vogue cover story, the "Diamonds" singer opened up about Rocky for the first time. “People don’t get out of the friend zone very easily with me,” she said. “And I certainly took a while to get over how much I know him and how much he knows me because we also know how much trouble we can land each other in.”
However, after a road trip with just the two of them, she got to see another side of Rocky. The "D.M.B." rapper has also vocalized his love for the Bajan star. Read below to see everything A$AP Rocky has said about Rihanna.
A$AP Rocky On Meeting Rihanna For The First Time
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Rihanna shot Rocky for the August cover story of W Magazine, and during the interview, he recalled when they first met. “It’s a lot of history between us,” he said. “I was kicked out of this nightclub. They wasn’t giving me no access to it. This is when I’m just starting out, so nobody knows me. I was with Matthew Williams and Virgil. I was getting into it with the bouncers, and she came out. We just locked eyes. She didn’t even know us, but she was like, ‘Yo! Why y’all not letting him in? What’s wrong with you?! Let that man in!’ ”
A$AP Rocky On Having Rihanna Star In His 2013 Music Video "Fashion Killa"
In his summer 2022 cover story for Dazed, the "Purple Swag" artist recalled the making of his "Fashion Killa" music video, which starred Rih. “I was just on tour with my lady, you know? We wanted it to feel like a love story, a fairytale with a street twist. I expected my core following to be receptive, but with Virgil in the mix, its success was a no-brainer. I was living in New York at the time, too.”
A$AP Rocky On Visiting Rihanna's Home Country Of Barbados For The First Time
In the same Dazed interview, he also opened up about visiting Barbados for the first time. During the trip, he not only met Rihanna's family but also some of his own family members. “It was honestly so unbelievable," he said.
"I had family there that only came up [to New York] once every five years, family I only spoke to over the phone my whole life. You remember those one-dollar, five-dollar phone cards? I was raised to know about my heritage, but I was missing the actual experience. I didn’t get to experience it until I was an adult. It was one of the most surreal experiences I’ve encountered in my lifetime.”
A$AP Rocky On Rihanna Being "The One"
In the June/ July 2021 issue of GQ, A$AP Rocky gushed about the bad gal being “the love of my life." “So much better when you got the One,” he said. “She amounts to probably, like, a million of the other ones. I think when you know, you know. She's the One.”
A$AP Rocky On His And Rihanna's Personal Styles
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Rocky and Riri are both fashion icons, respectively, so when they come together, it's a sight to behold. Speaking to Dazed, the father of two reflected on their personal styles. “I think it’s just natural. We happen to look good together naturally," he said.
"You know, it would take a lot of work to have us forcefully match before we leave the house. Sometimes we match to a T, or we just wear the same clothes. If I buy a shirt that she likes, I expect to get it stolen... but then I gotta steal it back.”
A$AP Rocky On He And Rihanna Making Time For Each Other
While speaking to Billboard, the Grammy-nominated rapper shared how he and Rih make time for each other despite their busy schedules. “[The relationship] is going great. I don’t think there’s a more perfect person because when the schedules are hectic, she’s very understanding of that. And when the schedule’s freed up, that’s when you get to spend [the] most time together. It’s all understanding and compatibility.”
A$AP Rocky On His And Rihanna's Parenting Differences
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In a clip that went viral, the "Tailor Swif" rapper talked about his and Rih's parenting styles, explaining that she "plays too f-kn much."
"She's fun as sh-t, too. I mean, she's the mom. I'm the dad. She's a female. I'm a male, and I think that's the only differences," he said. "We both silly as sh-t. She play too f-kin much, like she likes to prank and sh-t like that."
A$AP Rocky On Knowing He And Rihanna Would End Up Together
When discussing Rihanna in W Magazine, Rocky revealed that he always knew they would end up together. "I knew from when we were younger. We both did, I think. So it was only right when we got older. We just kind of reconnected.”
A$AP Rocky On How His And Rihanna's Personalities Are Reflected In Their Sons
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As he continued speaking to W Magazine, the fashion designer dished on his sons and how they are a reflection of him and Rihanna. “I think Rza is going to keep to himself. He’s an introvert,” Rocky said.
“Riot’s an extrovert—he’s just like his mom. Rza is more so like his dad, like me. And he’s my twin. He got his mom’s forehead, but he got everything else from me. I love my boy’s big forehead! I loved it on his mother. Listen to ‘Jukebox Joints.’ ”
A$AP Rocky On Rihanna Being A Supportive Partner And Great Mother
Rounding out his W Magazine interview, the Harlem-bred rapper praised Rihanna as his “companion, from my woman, from my partner. She knows when to hold it down," he said.
"I think we both have our niches, our things that we do that we’re good at. She could never be a great dad, because she’s a great mom. And I could never be a great mom, because I’m the greatest dad in the whole wide world.”
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