I stopped dieting and calorie-counting a few years ago. I realized that my attempts to slim down were rooted in self-loathing rather than self-love. I knew that the only way to combat that was to truly love myself — as soon as I did, I learned that my size was perfect for me.
One thing I never shied away from, though, was healthy living. Instead of fad-dieting — like I had done so many times in the past — I was simply eating better, consistently. Not for weight loss, but for health purposes. A few years into my (relatively) new healthy lifestyle, my brother started raving about a green smoothie cleanse he'd been doing. He wanted me to get on board and spoke highly of the benefits, but since I had already given up fad diets, I rebuked his idea. I didn't want to lose weight, so this challenge wasn't for me. That was until December 2018 reared its ugly head and I realized I needed a reset for my body.
This coincidentally was the perfect time; ending the year with fresh insides seemed like the best way to end a crappy year (no pun intended). After months of coaxing, my brother won: I agreed to do this cleanse. As soon as I received the information and reviewed the recipes, I trekked to the grocery store to buy what I needed.
The cleanse was straightforward. Each day had its own 72-ounce smoothie recipe. Each recipe included fruits and vegetables, along with ground flaxseeds, protein, and any other health food additives you wanted to throw in the blender. This was coupled with drinking daily detox teas (I opted for the Yogi brand). I reviewed the 40-page packet thoroughly so I knew what to expect.
Though hesitant, I was ready; I started bright-and-early on Monday morning.
Days 1-3 Of The 10-Day Green Smoothie Cleanse
The information packet suggested that these would be the hardest days of the cleanse. Participants were instructed to start slow if necessary, weaning ourselves off food one meal at a time. On the first day, we were to replace our breakfast with a smoothie; the second day, our breakfast and lunch; and the third day, our breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I was ready to jump in, so I started Day 1 strong — having a smoothie for breakfast and lunch and grilled chicken for dinner. By the second day, I was totally on smoothies, with the exception of approved snacks (unsalted nuts, fruit, tuna, grilled salmon, and boiled eggs). I was off to a great start.
Days 4-7 Of The 10-Day Green Smoothie Cleanse
After my initial high of mastering the first three days, my doubt began to kick in. Though the recipes were good, I was growing bored with them and tired of the mess smoothie-making was causing each morning. Despite all this, I pushed on. Still following the recipes, managing my snacks, and experiencing how my body was ridding itself of the toxins I had consumed all year. I began feeling a noticeable change in how I felt physically, and once I got over being grumpy, there was a change in how I felt emotionally too.
Days 7-10 Of The 10-Day Green Smoothie Cleanse
There was no turning back as day seven approached. I was too close to the finish line to turn back now, though I really wanted to. Days one through three garnered no cravings, but these last three days I wanted any and everything. I was in the thick of holiday party season, and hearing food menus took me over the edge. I sent a few "I'm going to cheat" texts to my friends who quickly got me together and reminded me of my own strength. My body had begun visibly transforming by this point; I refused to mess it up this close to the end. (Honesty moment: I did cheat on Day 8, and boy was it worth it!)
By the end of the cleanse, I felt less bloated, had loads more energy, and was down 2.5 inches around my waist (without exercising). I was also — surprisingly — happier. I felt much lighter, physically and emotionally, and knew that completing this cleanse was the best way to end the year. However, the cleanse didn't just recharge me physically and emotionally, it provided a life lesson I didn't realize I needed.
Participating in this 10-day Green Smoothie Cleanse taught me how to win at life (and everything else I choose to conquer).
When I first considered doing the challenge, I read the lengthy packet and became immediately discouraged. Not because the content was discouraging — I'm sure it was meant to be exciting and uplifting — but because the cleanse itself seemed like too much. I wasn't disciplined enough to complete something like this. I wasn't focused enough to really stick with it. As I read the instructions "I can't do this!" echoed in my head. I had never tried anything like this, but for some reason, I just knew I couldn't do it.
I considered all the factors that would prohibit me from completing this cleanse: "It's the holiday season," "I received too many party invites," "I have a fridge full of food that needs to be eaten," "I can't not chew anything for 10 days," "I just ordered coquito." Any excuse I could conjure up, I used to talk myself out of the cleanse before I failed at it. Before I even tasted the first smoothie, I was discounting my ability to complete the task at hand. I was excusing myself for my shortcomings before I even fell short.
I was prematurely counting myself out.
I realized that in order for me to actually do this, I couldn't do that. I couldn't tear myself down before I began. I had to trust myself enough to stand firm in my commitment. Too often we sell ourselves short before we have the opportunity to prove ourselves…to ourselves. We get a new job and are instantly worried that we won't measure up. We explore school options but become immediately anxious that we won't be able to handle the workload. We get engaged then become fearful that our marriage may end in divorce. We start new friendships and worry that those new friends will betray us. We draft an email and figure that no one will even respond. We experience any level of growth, and become concerned that we won't be able to sustain it.
These thoughts creep into our minds and stop us dead in our tracks. We think we've done ourselves a favor by preventing failure, before we actually fail.
That's not a favor, though — that, in itself, is failure. Not trying. Giving up on ourselves. Cancelling our journey before we even start it. We're not helping ourselves by trying to stop the pain before it starts, we're simply selling ourselves short.
Once I realized how my premature excuses were setting me up for failure, I immediately stopped those thoughts. I committed myself to the detox (and whatever journey it took me on), and I owned it. I vowed to handle any shortcomings when they happened, and not a moment before. I refused to sit in anticipation of failure, and instead, decided to give my all to this process and pray for the best. This strategy was much better than the one I utilized during my initial review. This one told me I could do this — and do it I did.
In order to soar in the ways you're called to, we must commit ourselves to the cause, and count ourselves in — not out. We must stop revoking our ability to conquer.
The only way to experience winning, is to give ourselves the opportunity to win. Not by crafting excuses to lighten the blow if we don't, but by trusting ourselves enough to know that we can.
10 days of smoothies taught me that.
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What Happened When I Cut Out Processed Foods, Meat & Dairy For A Week – Read More
Featured image by Getty Images
Zoe Hunter is the writer, speaker, and creator behind the women empowerment brand DEAR QUEENS. She uses vulnerability, storytelling, and spiritual development to empower women toward healthy decision-making. Stay connected to Zoe's work by visiting DEARQUEENS.com or following her on Twitter @zDEARQUEENS.
Reset Your Relationship: How To Start 2025 Strong With Your Partner
As the calendar turns and a new year unfolds, many of us are laser-focused on our career goals, fitness resolutions, and vision boards that outline the journey to our best selves. But amidst all the planning and self-improvement, have you made room for another important part of your life? Your relationship.
It's easy for couples to fall into a routine, going through the motions and letting their connection sit on autopilot. While comfort is natural in a long-term relationship, it’s important to remember: that what you don’t nurture, eventually fades. So, why not make 2025 the year you reset your relationship? Here’s how to start the year with a renewed bond, reigniting the spark that brought you together.
Step 1: Schedule Your Reset Meeting
The first step to hitting the reset button is a State of the Union meeting with your partner. This is your chance to take a pulse on the relationship, discuss what's working, and identify areas that need attention. It’s all about creating space to reflect, without distractions.
Grab a pen and paper (or open a shared note on your phone) and come prepared to share your top 2-3 desires for your relationship.
What do you both want to feel more of in 2025? Maybe it’s feeling more appreciated, or perhaps you want to reignite the passion you had when you first started dating. Whatever it is, get clear about it, and make sure both of you are on the same page.
This isn’t just about listing your own wants, it’s also about discussing ways to nurture each other’s needs. Relationship goals should be focused on fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and mutual respect. Use this time to check in, not only with each other but with your individual feelings and expectations. Set the foundation for a fulfilling year ahead.
Step 2: Set A Date (Or Multiple!)
Having the meeting is only the first step. Now, it’s time to take action. One of the simplest ways to breathe new life into a relationship is by reintroducing consistent, intentional time spent together. For many couples, life gets busy, and date nights fall by the wayside. But dating doesn’t stop when you say "I do"—in fact, it’s even more essential.
During your reset meeting, lock in a regular date night that works for both of your schedules. This could be a weekly dinner date or an every-other-week adventure—whatever keeps things fresh. The goal is consistency. It’s easy to push date nights aside when life gets hectic, but if you set a specific date each week or month, you’re making your relationship a priority.
If you’re unsure what to do for your date nights, don’t worry! The key is creating new experiences together. This is what sparks excitement and brings you closer as a couple. Whether it’s cooking a new recipe together, trying a dance class, or exploring a nearby town, it’s about creating shared memories that build your connection.
Step 3: Find an Accountability Partner
Just like you might have a personal trainer to help you crush your fitness goals, an accountability partner for your relationship can do wonders for keeping both of you on track. Consider hiring a marriage coach or therapist—someone who can meet you where you are and guide you in strengthening your relationship.
When selecting a professional, it’s important to choose someone who truly wants the best for your marriage and can provide actionable advice.
Don’t be afraid to set high standards for your relationship, and seek guidance on how to keep it thriving for the long haul. In your reset meeting, discuss your commitment to growth, and be honest about areas where you may need support.
Marriage isn’t a set-it-and-forget-it endeavor—it’s an ongoing process. Regular check-ins with a professional can help keep your relationship in tip-top shape and “divorce-proof” by addressing issues before they become insurmountable.
Step 4: Try Something New Together
Stale routines can easily make a relationship feel monotonous. Spice things up by trying something new! Couples that explore new activities and create new memories together have stronger, more fulfilling bonds.
My husband and I host one of the top luxury marriage retreats, A Weekend For Love, designed to help couples experience new things together. From couples' workshops to outdoor adventures, the retreat provides a platform to rediscover each other and reconnect on a deeper level.
The element of surprise can reignite your connection. It’s exciting, fresh, and shows your partner that you’re committed to growing together. This doesn’t have to be a huge commitment—it could be as simple as trying a new hobby or planning an impromptu weekend getaway.
Your Relationship Should Be A Priority
As you start the year with personal goals in mind, don’t forget the importance of nurturing your relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in work, fitness, and family obligations, but your bond with your partner deserves to be at the top of your list. Resetting your relationship offers an opportunity to reignite that spark and remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
In 2025, make a commitment to prioritize your partnership, to nurture it daily, and to invest in its growth. Take time to celebrate each other’s victories, support one another’s dreams, and build a foundation of love and respect. When you start the year with a clear focus on your relationship, you’re setting it up for success.
So, before you start mapping out your new workout plan or work goals, do yourself a favor: put your relationship at the top of that list. Your love story deserves a fresh start, too.
Happy New Year, and here’s to a love-filled 2025!
Couples, if you are ready to do the work and invest in your relationship register for A Weekend For Love: Heart Retreat Feb 21-23, 2025.
Featured image by zamrznutitonovi/Getty Images
Alaska Wasn’t On My Bucket List, But My Glacier Adventure Made Me A Believer
We all have bucket list destinations at the top of our lists. I visited one of those at the top of 2024: Japan! But what happens when you get an opportunity to go someplace that wasn’t on it? For me, that was Alaska. Now, I’d submitted my short film to the Anchorage International Film Festival, genuinely thinking it would be a long shot to get in with a short film about fibroids and Black women’s health.
However, to my surprise, I received an email that read: “It’s with great excitement that we announce your film, Super High: A Period Piece, has been selected for the 24th Anchorage International Film Festival.” After looking at the flight distance from Atlanta to Anchorage—a solid 10 hours one way— I’d decided this would be one I wouldn’t attend.
That was until there was a follow-up email that shared that the festival was sponsoring two excursions for filmmakers: A Northern Lights Tour and A Glacier Hike.
With that, I knew I had to make the trip to the 49th state! I flew Delta, which offered the shortest layovers—just 50 minutes each way. For a more comfortable flight on the longer legs that were about six hours between my layover city and Anchorage, I upgraded to first class with an in-app discount for $256 (the regular price of a first-class ticket runs about $2,100), which was so worth it for additional space and service for the six-hour trek.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
"So What’s Alaska Like? Did You Have To Wear a Snowsuit? What’s the Food Like?"
These are among the major questions I’ve gotten. Anchorage reminds me less of a bustling major city and more of a small town with an easygoing feel. When I arrived, they’d just had snow a few days before, so it was cold, and the streets were slick. So, I was so happy I’d invested in a pair of snow boots. For my first few days, the locals said it was warm. Warm to them being 20s at night and mid-30s during the day.
However, by the time I left, fresh snow was on the ground, and temps were well into the single digits—and it felt like it. Oh, the sun doesn’t rise until 10:30 a.m., and it sets around 4 p.m. That was among the most challenging things to experience because I felt like I never really woke up. So, between the lack of sun and the four-hour time difference, I felt tired the whole time I was there.
As for food, I didn’t explore a ton because I was so cold. But I found two gems! First was Whiskey and Ramen. If you enjoy ramen and exceptional service, this is a must-visit. I’d make a trip back just for their Wagyu ramen and their special take on an old fashion!
And, for coffee, I thoroughly enjoyed That Feeling Co. The coffee was great, and being surrounded by plants helped to perk up my spirits.
The Northern Lights
Iceland is one of the most popular places to see the Northern Lights, so I was very excited to know that Alaska also gets to see the Aurora Borealis light show. Typically, many people visit Fairbanks to see them, but there are tours offered in Anchorage too! When prepping for the late-night tour, we’d heard that the night we were heading out to see the lights, the cloud coverage likely meant we wouldn’t be able to see them. Bummer. I know. So, we could sit the tour out or still try. But, in my mind, I was like, why would I come all the way to Alaska not to try?
So, at about 9:30 p.m., we piled into vans and headed out to chase the Northern Lights. We traveled about an hour and a half from Anchorage, and when we stepped out of the van, it was cold and pitch black. And unfortunately, after a couple of hours in the cold, those clouds in the sky never parted for us. I know that when we see the posts of people who do get to see Mother Nature do her thing, we don’t have all of the context of the science, which is Aurora Borealis.
Sometimes, the weather just doesn’t do what we earthlings would like, which can lead to disappointment. However, our guide did give a recommendation. When you book a trip to see the lights, give yourself four to five days to see them. Don’t bank on one day because, at the end of the day, this is science.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Now, On to the Glacier!
Just six hours after returning from the Northern Lights tour, we were up for the glacier tour because they were back-to-back! I was exhausted and so excited. If someone had told me I’d hike on a glacier, I would have given them a mean side-eye. I mean, where on earth does one climb a glacier? Let me share a few destinations with you, just in case you want to plan an icy adventure: Switzerland, Norway, Iceland, Chile, Argentina, and Alaska.
Aside from the fact the Matanuska Glacier is 22,000 years old, it’s the largest glacier accessible by car in the United States—27 miles long and four miles wide, making it one of the easier ones to see IRL. As a girlie with generalized anxiety disorder, I get anxious about doing this kind of thing because I know that to see these world wonders is usually a mountainous trek.
This one was two hours long, one-way, up snow-capped, windy, mountainous terrain. However, my therapist always reminds me to push myself to do what scares me (as long as it’s for a reason, of course). I held my breath for the journey there and back! And white-knuckled it from time to time, too.
Courtesy of Bianca Lambert
Once we got there, we were surrounded by fresh, fluffy snow, and it was COLD! In the negative cold. I was thankful, I’d over-prepared. If you even go on a glacier tour, I recommend a few things: Balaclava, heavy-weight gloves, cashmere socks, snow boots, and lots of layers.
Here’s what I wore. My first layer was Ann Taylor leggings and a Wolford Turtleneck. Then, I layered a cashmere turtleneck and cashmere joggers. A COACH down vest, which I’d recommend anyone own just for winter, in general, because it’s SO warm! For my feet, I wore Ann Taylor cashmere socks (I love these because they’re affordable and so warm) and Adidas Adifom Superstar Winter Boot and topped all of that with a Brandon Blackwood ankle-length parka. I know BB is known for his accessories, but the brand’s outwear is truly amazing and worth the investment. After two hours on the ice, I felt great!
If you’re open to adventure travel, I highly recommend putting a glacier tour on your list of things to do. There are a few reasons. First, standing on an ice age-old massive piece of glacier was my 2024 version of touching some grass. I was reminded that I’m a speck on this spinning rock and need to spend more time grounded in that fact as I move through the world. I looked to the sky and thought of how proud my ancestors would be, even though I know they’d be telling me to get my butt home and off a dog on a glacier!
Secondly, I gained an ever-large appreciation for Mother Nature as I learned that glaciers are the world's largest reservoir of freshwater, containing around 69% of the world's freshwater. Again, another fact that helped me gain perspective. Lastly, it’s just fun and stunningly beautiful!
After this, I’m looking forward to my next cold-weather adventure! Iceland and Argentina are at the top of the list!
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Featured image courtesy of Bianca Lambert