

The ladies of Harlem participated in an exclusive girl chat with xoNecole in Twitter Spaces over the weekend and, while discussing their show, they also shared some deep, inspiring words with us. Meagan Good, Grace Byers, and Shoniqua Shandai each opened up about love and friendships while also revealing some personal experiences that really resonated with the audience. While you can listen to the full conversation here, we also broke down some of the most memorable gems to give you some affirmations that you can take with you wherever you go.
On Their Daily Mantras
“No matter where He takes me, no matter where I go, I am fearfully and I am wonderfully made for the room that I’m in.” - Shoniqua Shandai
“God I am your child. I am dearly loved. I am loved unconditionally. I belong to you God. Jesus, I am your friend. Jesus, I am your bride. God, I am your residence. Greater who is He, who is in the world. I am blameless. I am righteous. I am adequate. I am a new creation. I am never alone.” - Meagan Good
“I will show up as I am and I will love myself there.” - Grace Byers
On Rejection and Disappointment
“You may not have accepted what I brought to the table, but that does not define who I am nor will it define what I’m going to do in another realm after this.” - Grace Byers
“Even in this pain, I know that I’m being propelled forward.” - Shoniqua Shandai
“Rejection is the Lord’s protection." - Meagan Good
On Feeling Safe In Friendships
“Not everybody has to be your best friend. Some people you are just called to be there for, but that doesn't necessarily mean that they have to be there for you.” - Meagan Good
On the Art of Letting Go
“My mind shift of letting go is allowing myself to feel the feelings, but really reminding myself that the priority of letting someone go is choosing myself.” - Shoniqua Shandai
“We’re going in two different paths. I love me. My love is not worthy in the eyes of what you say it is and I know what my love and my worth and my value truly are and because of that, I’mma step away with some grace.” - Grace Byers
“Having faith when things are going well is easy. Having faith when things are crazy and they don’t make sense and you’re confused or whatever it may be, that’s when it really matters and that’s when you get the closest to God.” - Meagan Good
On Self-Love
“For Black people, for people of color, all we know is how to hustle ‘cause that’s the world that has been built for us. We hustle, we hustle, we work hard. We always have to go over and beyond, but so much of our humanity, so much of our strength is in our rest and is in our joy.” - Grace Byers.
“Our introduction to this land was violent. We have been whipped into shape and that mentality is so harmful to ourselves and to our minds and I just want us to be gentle to ourselves.” - Shoniqua Shandai
“You have to love yourself otherwise how is someone else gonna know how to love you fully.” - Meagan Good
Featured image by Hatnim Lee/WireImage/Getty Images
'He Said, She Said': Love Stories Put To The Test At A Weekend For Love
At the A Weekend For Love retreat, we sat down with four couples to explore their love stories in a playful but revealing way with #HeSaidSheSaid. From first encounters to life-changing moments, we tested their memories to see if their versions of events aligned—because, as they say, every story has three sides: his, hers, and the truth.
Do these couples remember their love stories the same way? Press play to find out.
Episode 1: Indira & Desmond – Love Across the Miles
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, but for Indira & Desmond, love made it stronger. Every mile apart deepened their bond, reinforcing the unshakable foundation of their relationship. From their first "I love you" to the moment they knew they had found home in each other, their journey is a beautiful testament to the endurance of true love.
Episode 2: Jay & Tia – A Love Story Straight Out of a Rom-Com
If Hollywood is looking for its next Black love story, they need to take notes from Jay & Tia. Their journey—from an awkward first date to navigating careers, parenthood, and personal growth—proves that love is not just about romance but also resilience. Their story is full of laughter, challenges, and, most importantly, a love that stands the test of time.
Episode 3: Larencia & Mykel – Through the Highs and Lows
A date night with police helicopters overhead? Now that’s a story! Larencia & Mykel have faced unexpected surprises, major life changes, and 14 years of choosing each other every single day. But after all this time, do they actually remember things the same way? Their episode is sure to bring some eye-opening revelations and a lot of laughs.
Episode 4: Soy & Osei – A Love Aligned in Purpose
From a chance meeting at the front door to 15 years of unwavering love, faith, and growth, Soy & Osei prove that when two souls are aligned in love and purpose, nothing can shake their foundation. Their journey is a powerful reminder that true love is built on mutual support, shared values, and a deep connection that only strengthens with time.
Each of these couples has a unique and inspiring story to tell, but do their memories match up? Watch #HeSaidSheSaid to find out!
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Synthetic Braiding Hair & Chemicals: What To Know & What To Do Next
When I was younger, one of my favorite hairstyles was cornrows. I would get them long (as long as mom would allow me to get) with beads on the end. To get the length I wanted, I would add synthetic braiding hair.
Just like many other Black women I know, going to the hair store with my mom or other family members to grab a pack of kanekalon braiding hair was the norm. As I grew up and advanced, so did the hair industry.
Now, when you go to the hair store you are inundated with all kinds of hair textures, colors, and more. That’s why it was so upsetting to read the latest report about synthetic braiding hair.
Delmaine Donson/ Getty Images
A Feb 27 Consumer Reports article revealed that most popular synthetic hair brands that are used for braiding have dangerous chemicals such as carcinogens, lead and volatile organic compounds (VOCs). The report stated that 10 of the brands were tested and all 10 had these chemicals. These brands included Shake-N-Go, Sassy Collection, and Sensationnel.
These chemicals include benzene, which is a carcinogen that has been linked to acute myeloid leukemia and unsafe levels of lead, which can cause kidney damage, brain damage, and cardiovascular problems in adults.
In children, it can cause brain and nervous system damage, learning disabilities, behavioral problems and even developmental delays.
James E. Rogers, PhD, director and head of product safety testing led the testing for synthetic braiding hair. “Our exposure and risk analysis found all nine products could expose a regular user of any of these products to a level of lead that could be concerning over time,” he said.
As shocking as this is, it also brought some clarity around why I’ve had issues with wearing braiding hair as of late.
Not only have I dealt with scalp irritation, I’ve even had breakouts on my back from the hair touching. Since then, I’ve started rinsing the hair with apple cider vinegar, and haven’t had that many issues. However, the report stated that ACV isn’t a “cure-all” and can potentially release harmful chemicals when rinsing the hair.
@javonford16 Replying to @Julianna Rebundle vid: @Javon Ford Beauty #blackhairstyles #braidinghair #blackgirlhairstyles @Consumer Reports
While the report sparked some outrage, chemist Javon Ford has a different view. In a TikTok video, he shared that the report was tested for oral exposure and not dermal exposure.
He showed a screenshot of an email he allegedly sent Consumer Reports questioning their decision to test this way. The email said, “the best model to use, in our view, is the ingestion model for the reasons given in the article.”
“While I understand they went with that model, I don’t agree with it because you’re not intentionally ingesting braids,” Javon said. The chemist also said that the amount of chemicals found in the brands is “conservative” compared to other types of products.
So what does this mean for us braid-wearers? If you still want to wear braids, but have some concerns, you can limit how often you wear them. Another option is wearing non-toxic braiding hair or plant-based hair. The only downside is that it's pricier than synthetic hair.
The Consumer Report also suggested checking for recalls, reading labels carefully, and reporting adverse effects. Hair isn’t regulated by the Food and Drug Administration, so it’s best to do your research when making purchases.
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