Period Sex Is Not A Turn-Off
I know, I know, I know. I can only guess where your minds are after reading this title – somewhere between interested and not in a million years, disgust palpable, at the very next exit – two extremes not at all unique to the subject at hand. There's something very taboo about a crimson dick.
For whatever reason, there has been a large degree of social stigma affiliated with something naturally occurring within our bodies as women. Periods are perceived to be a "no sex zone", off limits, do not pass go, exit stage right moment on a month to month basis for four to six days, 12 months out of the year (the schedule varies for those who are irregular or on contraceptives intended to stop or regulate monthly cycles).
I've only ever heard what was wrong about periods. What made it a nuisance, what made it painful, what made it stressful, what made it barren -- empty. It is very rare that it is flipped on its head to be appreciated for what it is. By definition, it's feminine nature, and therefore it's power. It's one of those undeniable things that make you a woman, a giver of life, a creator of life. A period symbolizes that capability and is a reminder of what your womb space and canal are purposed for. That in itself is beautiful. As an extension of me and my womanhood, why couldn't it be sexy?
The tides turned and the floodgates finally opened one night a few years into my sex life where I was honest with myself and my inner desires. During ovulation, hormones within the body are believed to be at their highest, but many women (including me) also find themselves feeling heightened in their libido. There was something about being forced to refrain from sex that made me want it more, period or no period.
I tried it.
I liked it.
And though I will be very honest and say that it is not as seamless a routine as mundane sex, it can be just as primal, intimate, and -- well -- sexy.
The conversation that led me to giving it a try was relatively easy, especially because I was inebriated and with a partner who held the philosophy of “A period doesn't stop nothing but a sentence." When I dropped my ideals and adopted his, the sex flowed, no pun intended. We put down a towel, grabbed a condom (because don't be fooled, you can get pregnant while on your period, uterine lining shedding or not), and I was able to try it out without my overthinking getting in the way of what I was feeling. And it was awesome!
I've found that not only am I more sensitive and more aroused at this time, but around day three or four of my cycle, the amount of blood down there is very minimal, especially when excited. Use a shower as your love-making setting of choice to help with the clean up efforts post-coitus. The positions you choose can also be a help to alleviate the presence of your period during sex. I've found that missionary is easiest because the level of depth can be controlled a lot better. Doggy style and other positions where depth reigns truest should be avoided at the start of the period but can be worked in as the flow becomes lighter later on in the cycle.
If blood doesn't bother you much, by all means, let it go, let it flow.
My a-ha moment with how I felt about period sex led me to wondering how others outside of me viewed period sex. I expected to hear a lot more hell no's but was pleasantly surprised at the thoughts that unfolded…
“I have no issue having sex with a woman on her period, I've done it a lot actually. From my experience, my woman is extremely horny during that time anyway, and as a man who loves sex, who am I to deny her? It's not nearly as bad as people imagine it to be." – Jason R.
“I have before. And it was really good. However, I was also drunk. But I can't say I'm against it. The mindset usually is period means 'no sex'. Learning exactly what a period is actually helped me to appreciate a woman's body." – Stephen G.
“Period sex isn't bad. If you're horny, you're horny. Put a towel down and get it to it. It's just a confirmation that I'm not pregnant. It works best in relationship though. When you're in a relationship you've kinda already passed all the boundaries of trying to be cute all the time. Plus, sometimes I get super horny on my period and just want it. So who would turn down free sex especially when it helps with my cramps and my mood? Win win." – Shantell H.
“I think period sex is fine. I don't really see a big deal with it. But personally, I wouldn't do it. I'm self conscious enough as it is and I'm not ready for it." – Anna P.
“I can't see myself having sex on a period…I like foreplay too much maybe more than sex itself and not to be able to get it because Mother Nature wants to interfere, sex isn't as enjoyable for me if no foreplay is involved." – Shannon C.
“I'm cool with it. I haven't done it often, but it was always a good experience when it happened. I've never thought that a period was something that should prevent you from sharing your love. It's human, it's womanly, it's real." – Jaden A.
“Period sex is a part of life for all but some people indulge. I've indulged before. I've had protected and unprotected sex with a woman on her cycle but during the last day and maybe the first. It's not something I aim to do, but it's definitely something I'm conscious of." – Neilson B.
How do you feel about period sex? Share with me below!
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Megan Thee Stallion Shares Her Transformative Approach To Health And Wellness
Megan Thee Stallion is back and better than ever — both physically and mentally.
ForWomen’s Health May/June 2024 cover, the 29-year-old rapper bared all, opening up about her healing journey following the aftermath of the July 2020 shooting incident by rapper Tory Lanez.
“A lot of people didn’t treat me like I was human for a long time,” she told the publication. “I feel like everybody was always used to me being the fun and happy party girl. I watched people build me up, tear me down, and be confused about their expectations of me.”
She continued, “As a Black woman, as a darker Black woman, I also feel like people expect me to take the punches, take the beating, take the lashings, and handle it with grace. But I’m human.”
While the “Savage” artist exudes confidence through her stage presence and boisterous lyrics, behind the scenes, Megan was experiencing a silent battle with her mental health. “Before I went onstage, I would be crying half the time because I didn’t want to [perform], but I also didn’t want to upset my fans,” she says.
With pressures from the outside world piling up, Megan experienced “dark times,” that caused her to isolate from the public eye.
“I didn’t want to get [out] from under the covers,” she recalls. “I stayed in my room. I would not turn the lights on. I had blackout curtains. I didn’t want to see the sun. I knew I wasn’t myself. It took me a while to acknowledge that I was depressed. But once I started talking to a therapist, I was able to be truthful with myself.”
The “Wanna Be” rapper also details her current workout slip and diet that work hand in hand, giving her the mental clarity and stamina to perform at her highest level. For four to five days a week, Megan is locked in with one of her two trainers, Emory “Joc” Bernard and Tim Boutte, doing a variety of workouts like Pilates, running up and down sand hills at the beach, or hitting the StairMaster or elliptical for upwards of 40 minutes.
Best known for her “Megan knees,” leg day is a must — with hip thrusts, goblet squats, leg extensions, and “stallion kicks,” being included in her circuits.
With a combination of therapy, stepping away from imbalanced relationships, and daily movement, the Houston Hottie has since been able to reconnect with herself on a deeper level; putting her happiness before the opinions of others. “Working on myself made me get into working out because I needed to focus my energy somewhere else,” she shares. “I used working out to escape and to get happy.”
“I’m in a space where I feel good mentally, so I want to look as good as I feel.”
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