What Traveling To Dangerous Countries Has Taught Me About Fear
As a financially strapped college student, I used to think that traveling was a luxury only afforded to the rich.
Still, that didn't deter me from finding awesome flight deals and packing my bags to destinations all around the globe. In total, I have been to 11 countries. Growing up I always visited Kenya at least once a year or every couple of years, and so it surprises me to see so many people hesitant on visiting the beautiful nation due to the terrorist attacks that have recently been reported in the news.
The media has a wonderful way of painting less fortunate countries as dangerous every time there is a terrorist attack, and it's something that cripples the economy of those countries. Many people fail to realize that the odds of being killed by a terrorist organization is slim, and that they have more chance of getting hit by a car in their own city.
I visited Kenya in 2014 just a couple of months after the Westgate Mall shooting, and when I got on the plane it didn’t even occur to me that it happened months ago. We landed the next day and I enjoyed my vacation. I stayed in a Kenyan village with some of my family and took time to see some of the sites and native animals. It didn’t once occur to me that I could die at any moment; I was too busy immersing myself in such a beautiful country. I thought to myself, If I had decided not to come out of fear, I would have missed out on the giraffes and gazelles and the experience of being with my family. Sometimes our fears are driven by what we hear and see on the news. I'll admit that at times it’s valid, but many times they're illusions.
[Tweet "Sometimes our fears are driven by what we hear and see in the news."]
This past November, I booked a trip to Europe just weeks before the terrorist attack in Paris. At that moment, my friend and I both declared that it wasn’t a good idea to go despite the pressure from our family members to stay in our "safe" country. Was our fear warranted? Of course it was, but what we didn’t realize was Paris was going to be even more safe now due to the increased security. We were very close to cancelling our entire trip based on this one event. We went back and forth for days wondering if we should cancel and questioning whether or not we'd make it back alive. Eventually we decided that if it was our time to go, at least we'd die in an unforgettable city.
When December 9th came around and we boarded our flight, we couldn't help but to be giddy with excitement. We ended up having an amazing winter break as we explored the streets of Oslo, canals of Amsterdam, museums of Paris, churches of Barcelona, ruins of Athens, towns of Italy and Christmas markets in Berlin.
If we had decided to not go to Europe out of fear, we would have missed out on a world of memories.
As I write this, I’m still reeling from my recent trip to Egypt. When I first proposed the idea to my friends, they said no way in hell. When I told my mother, she couldn’t believe it. Many of her friends asked why would I even go there. Egypt’s tourism has been declining yearly due to the revolution and terrorist attacks. At one time, many people flocked to their beaches, now it’s a ghost town. Since I’ve learned to live fearlessly, I booked my ticket to Egypt with my friend and hoped for the best. Of course I was scared that I might lose my life as terrorism gets increasingly worse in Egypt. I even confessed my fear of going to my friend, and he reminded me that we are from one of the most dangerous cities (Baltimore) and that we can easily be killed at anytime, so Egypt shouldn’t scare us. He had a very valid point. The flight date rolled around and I was excited; I couldn’t wait to land in Cairo and gaze at the pyramids that I'd previously only seen in photos. We landed at 2AM, and it looked like a war zone. Many builds were torn down, and some were only halfway standing. You could visually see just how much Cairo has been suffering. It didn’t help that the taxi driver swindled my friend and I out of money. My friend was scared, and as soon as we got into the hotel room he remarked how he wanted to go home.
Despite all of this, I kept a positive attitude. The next day we went to see the pyramids, and I realized that seeing a piece of history was worth it. When I came face to face with King Tut’s mask, I knew coming to Egypt was a good idea despite what the media said. We even rode ATV’s in the desert, something I wouldn’t have been able to do if I stayed home.
[Tweet "While we are alive we should do all the things we want even if it scares us."]
The truth of the matter is we all will pass away at some point--maybe today, tomorrow, or many years from now. While we are alive we should do all the things we want even if it scares us. If I would have cancelled all of my trips due to fears, I wouldn’t have experienced so many cultures and met so many people. I wouldn’t have such a great Instagram feed either. It is the media’s job to scare you and shove terror in your face; they want your views. The memories I have made are priceless, and are a general lesson in life do everything that scares you.
What have you done that scares you today?
_______________________________
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
Let’s make things inbox official! Sign up for the xoNecole newsletter for daily love, wellness, career, and exclusive content delivered straight to your inbox.
You've Never Seen Luke James In A Role Quite Like This
Over the years, we've watched Luke James play countless characters we'd deem sex symbols, movie stars, and even his complicated character in Lena Waithe's The Chi. For the first time in his career, the New Orleans-born actor has taken on a role where his signature good looks take a backseat as he transforms into Edmund in Them: The Scare—a mentally deranged character in the second installment of the horror anthology series that you won't be able to take your eyes off.
Trust us, Edmund will literally make you do a double take.
xoNecole sat down with Luke James to talk about his latest series and all the complexity surrounding it—from the challenges taking on this out-of-the-box role to the show's depiction of the perplexing history of the relationship between Black Americans and police. When describing the opportunity to bring Edmund's character to life, Luke was overjoyed to show the audience yet another level of his masterful acting talents.
"It was like bathing in the sun," he said. "I was like, thank you! Another opportunity for me to be great—for me to expand my territory. I'm just elated to be a part of it and to see myself in a different light, something I didn't think I could do." He continued, "There are parts of you that says, 'Go for it because this is what you do.' But then also that's why it's a challenge because you're like, 'um, I don't know if I'm as free as I need to be to be able to do this.' Little Marvin just created such a safe space for me to be able to do this, and I'm grateful for everything I've been able to do to lead to this."
Courtesy
Them: The Scare, like the first season, shines a light on the plight of Black Americans in the United States. This time, the story is taking place in the 1990s, at the height of the Rodney King riots in Los Angeles. While the series presents many underlying themes, one that stands out is Black people and the complicated relationship with the police. "For the audience, I think it sets the tone for the era that we're in and the amount of chaos that's in the air in Los Angeles and around the country from this heinous incident. And I say it just sets the tone of the anxiety and anxiousness that everybody is feeling in their own households."
James has been a longtime advocate against police brutality himself. He has even featured Elijah McClain, the 23-year-old Colorado man who died after being forcibly detained by officers, as his Instagram avatar for the past five years. So, as you can imagine, this script was close to his heart. "Elijah was a soft-loving oddball. Different than anyone but loving and a musical genius. He was just open and wanted to be loved and seen."
Getty Images
Luke continued, "His life was taken from him. I resonate with his spirit and his words...through all the struggle and the pain he still found it in him to say, 'I love you and I forgive you.' And that's who we are as people—to our own detriment sometimes. He's someone I don't want people to forget. I have yet to remove his face from my world because I have yet to let go of his voice, let go of that being [because] there's so many people we have lost in our history that so often get forgotten."
He concluded, "I think that's the importance of such artwork that moves us to think and talk about it. Yes, it's entertaining. We get to come together and be spooked together. But then we come together and we think, 'Damn, Edmund needed someone to talk to. Edmund needed help... a lot [of] things could have been different. Edmund could have been saved.'
Check out the full interview below.
Luke James Talks Ditching Sex Symbol Status For "Them: The Scare", Elijah McClain, & Morewww.youtube.com
Featured image by Getty Images