The Brazilian Wax: Why Women Go Bare
I got my first wax senior year of college for spring break in Miami. I decided to opt out of the beginner bikini option and went for the full monty: the Brazilian wax. For those who may be unfamiliar on what a Brazilian wax is, it's a technique where all of the pubic hair is removed from front to back, leaving you as smooth and as bare down there as a baby.
It was a beautiful sunny Saturday, so my girlfriends and I picked a salon and set up a group appointment to get our first waxes just in time to hit the beach. I was so excited, but I also had no idea what to expect. We were a group of novices in the wax world all joining forces to accomplish the same mission. This may sound dramatic, but as each of us entered the salon rooms one by one, I could hear a couple of them squeal in pain. A few of the other rooms remained silent. Were they dead? Did they pass out? What's going on in there?! Those were just a few of the many thoughts running through my mind until the wax beautician called out my name. It was finally my turn to find out and face the music.
While lying on the soft terry cloth table, my beautician tried her best to make small talk with me in efforts to distract me from the task at hand. She won and I was caught off-guard every single time. Each pull was fast and painful. The sting would last for a few seconds, but when placing her hand over each area after the pull, the pain settled. These steps repeated multiple times while being put in every compromising position to get the job done. About halfway through, I told her I wanted to stop and then I looked down at how ridiculous “my half-assed situation" looked and was forced to continue until every hair was gone.
In the end, I absolutely loved the results.
Not only did I feel fresh and smooth, but the comfort in knowing that I wouldn't have to worry about my nether regions for a few weeks put me at ease! The whole experience made me curious of why other women get waxes and who they get them for, if anyone.
My girlfriends and I have had numerous discussions as to why we wax. Let me introduce you to a few of them:
For Special Occasions
Tiffany: “I didn't really think it was all that painful or unbearable. It's definitely NOTHING like getting your eyebrows waxed of course, but my experience wasn't terrible and I loved the results. I'd definitely do it again. I also choose to wax when I know I will be wearing bikinis. I like the clean look and not having to feel self-conscious about what bikinis I can and can't wear. It makes me feel free and I like that."
Sade: “I usually get waxes for special occasions. It makes the hair lighter after a while, which I like and if I haven't gone in a while, it's not as hairy or painful. When I had a boo, I did it for him, but then after a while, I just liked the general upkeep here and there. I used to go every six weeks, now I make sure to schedule 4-5 appointments over the course of the year. It makes me feel like I'm maintaining myself, similar to the feeling of getting your nails done."
Summer: “Well, I don't get waxes every month like I used to. I will every once in a while. Initially, I was getting them because I didn't want to shave… then, I got married. I do like how clean it looks and feels, but moral of the story is that I cared before I got married. I don't really do it much anymore because it's super painful, and I mean, he's going to want it regardless."
For A Man
Maria: “I JUST got a wax! It makes me feel fresh, clean, and sexy and I don't have to worry about razor bumps from shaving. When I get a wax, I'm ready to show off my kitty to anyone!"
For Herself
Brooke: “I've been getting waxed for so long that I consider it part of my regular beauty regimen. In the same way that I get my nails done every other week or get my hair done weekly, I get a wax every month. It makes me feel great and confident. And this way, I'm ready for bikini season year-round."
Christina: “Reluctantly, yes, I'm #teamwax. I haven't subjected myself to the torture since December since it's been cold and no one's clearly been on my lawn, but I'll get them when spring gets here. I definitely get them for the confidence and sexy factor. And a groomed lawn definitely makes sexy undies look better."
Sam: “I get Brazilians regularly. I feel cleaner when it's all gone and it's really smooth. It lasts longer than shaving too. I go about every five weeks and I get them for myself. The older I get, the more I like doing those things for me."
We all have various reasons why we maintain the upkeep of our lady parts. For me personally, I get waxed sporadically. Although again, I love the results, it's a lot of maintenance that I'm just too lazy to put in. It's also uncomfortable and costly over time. I believe a Brazilian can range from $30-$50 depending on where you get it done.
Add that up over the course of every 3-4 weeks, and you get the picture. If I had my way, I would laser it away so I wouldn't have to deal with it ever again. That day might be in my near future, but until then, I'll stick with my sporadic routine. Perhaps over the summer or for vacation, or maybe for my man. I'll do it whenever I feel like it.
What about you? Do you relate to me or any of my friends? What type of wax do you prefer and who do you wax it off for?
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As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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How A Stay At Switzerland's Luxurious 7132 Hotel Reminded Me To Live The Life I Deserve
Sometimes, as women—especially as single Black women—we simply need to be reminded that we are deserving of living a life we dream of. Even if that means creating it for ourselves. I recently set out on a weeklong trip to Switzerland, a trip I’ve been wanting to take for years, and near the end of my visit, I had an epiphany.
“DeAnna, this is the life you deserve,” I thought to myself as I took in the gorgeous bathroom in my suite at the famous 7132 Hotel and Thermal Spa. It was one of the most luxurious hotels (and bathrooms) I had ever stayed in—and that’s saying a lot for someone who often travels for work.
To help you better understand why this was such a mental awakening for me, I first need to give a bit of my backstory. I’m in my late thirties. I’m an attorneyand a journalist. I own a home and have traveled the world extensively. Essentially, I’ve done everything in life I set out to do. However, when it comes to dating, I struggle. Not because there is anything wrong with me per se, but because my career and “lifestyle” often create problems in my romantic relationships.
View from my hotel room
Courtesy
I’ve been told everything from, ‘I can’t continue to date you because you seem to choose your career over wanting to settle down and have kids’ by a man after only the second date to ‘Maybe if you just sat down somewhere for a while, I’d actually wife you’ by someone who has honestly never proven themselves to be the settle down type. And these are only a handful of the things I’ve been told over the years.
It’s been frustrating, to say the least, and there have even been seasons where I purposely dimmed my light in hopes that my career wouldn’t push away potential suitors. I know what you’re thinking, “Girl, why would you even consider that? If they’re for you, it won’t matter what you do.” Hey, don’t judge me, but also, I one hundred percent agree.
My hotel bathroom
Courtesy
That’s why this recent moment in Switzerland was right on time. When I first walked into the hotel to check in, I was blown away by the surrounding beauty. It was a five-star property with one of the world’s most famous thermal bathhouses. Yet, it was something about seeing that 90% of the hotel’s guests were couples, that forced me to sit back for a bit of introspection—while soaking in the thermal spa, of course.
As I went through the mental conversation, there was a battle of sorts. On one hand, I knew that being able to partake in experiences like the one I was having at that moment was important to me. I knew that, at times I actually love being able to dabble in the finer things—after all, I’ve worked hard to be able to afford them. On the other hand, and sadly, I knew that sometimes being a single Black woman that publicly showcases her “luxurious” habits can intimidate men and even scare them off from pursuing you under the guise of them feeling like they “can’t do anything for you, because you have everything.”
My hotel room
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So, what is a girl to do?
Do I minimize/hide the life and experiences that I have? Do I play down the hard work I’ve put in to get where I am professionally? Or, do I risk being single in exchange for being able to have said life, without backlash?
Luckily, the joy that I felt while being at this property won. There was something about taking a full day to simply pamper myself at the bathhouse and in my in-room steam shower and soaker tub, indulging in cuisine from a 2-star Michelin restaurant and doing all of this while surrounded by an amazing group of Black women that reminded me—this is certainly the life I was meant to live and that I deserve. Even if it means that right now, I’ll just have to provide it for myself until the right partner comes along. And honestly, I’m okay with that.
Restaurant at 7132 hotel
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