"What's In There?" An Owner's Manual For Your Vagina
It seemed like yesterday when my husband and I were laughing at the episode of Orange is the New Black where Sophia explained the anatomy of a vagina to several Litchfield Prison inmates.
Long story short, they didn't know what the heck was in there. Unfortunately, they're not alone, because many women don't know what's in their love boxes, and have never, ever taken a peek under the hood.
The sad part is that there are women who would let someone slide a dong, a tongue, a toy, and sometimes vegetables, in their love cave without ever knowing what's going on downstairs. Also, it's an election year, and people who don't even have vaginas are trying to make laws about them. So yeah, you should care about what's in there.
Despite popular belief, there is no calm, warm ocean inside your love box. So here's a short owner's manual for your lady parts. After reading this article, I hope you can muster up the courage to bend over a mirror and take a look at your no-no bits, because YOLO (and it's yours).
- It's supposed to look like a deflated tube. You read that correctly. The outside of your vagina looks like a deflated tube that's 2 to 4 inches long, and ¾ of an inch wide. It connects the outer sex organs with the cervix and uterus (where the blood flows, and the baby grows).
- It's supposed to be multicolored and oddly shaped on the outside of the hood. All vaginas aren't pink, depending on your race. Your labia, clitoris, and vaginal opening can range in colors from pink to a deep reddish brown. Also, a nurse told me that the labia comes in different shapes and sizes, and has zero to do with vaginal tightness. If you thought this, you're wrong.
- The whole package is called the vulva. All of your external love box organs is called the the vulva. It consists of the outer lips (Labia Majora), the inner lips (Labia Minora), and the clitoris. You're supposed to have one of each. But if you have more than one of each, then you should call your doctor, or get into porn. Or both.
- You have a hole for peeing, and two other holes for “other stuff." You have a urethra (where your urine flows), a vaginal opening (where the penis/toys/veggies and tampon goes), and further down toward your booty is your anus (where you poo). Either way, you should know which is which.
- Bacteria grows in there. If you can go five hours without having to clean that thing out, or rinsing your panties after lusting over one of our #xomen, then you're a rare woman, and we salute you. But for the rest of us, it's a paradise for good bacteria, and that's normal. The good bacteria keeps your lady parts in check, so you don't get an infection.
- You're supposed to have discharge. Yes, your vagina is built to have stuff come out of it, and that's normal. Dr. Oz says,
If discharge is clear or milky white, that's normal. It can also look very pale yellow when it's dried. If you are seeing grey, green, yellow, pink or red, that's not. Blood-tinged mucous may be a sign of pregnancy.
- It cleans itself. My good friend, who is a lesbian, once told me that the best way to make sure you had a squeaky clean vagina was to stick a whole bar of soap in your box. After I gave her the side eye and told my doctor (who was horrified), he quickly dispelled that rumor. Turns out, vaginas are self-cleaning. According to WebMD:
If anything, you just need a mild soap or shampoo on your pubic hair and the outer vulva. Avoid rubbing with a washcloth. Don't douche or use other special cleaning products for your vagina. These can ruin the normal balance of bacteria and cause problems.
- It's best to shave it. Back in the 70s, it was cool to have a hairy bush. But with advancements in medicine, gynos today usually suggest that you “trim the hedges." By "trim the hedges," I mean keep the hair low, because doctors don't suggest you go completely bare down stairs. But if you have a partner who is old school, and likes the 1970s look, go for what you know. Just don't be surprised when your gyno shakes his or her head at you.
- Give it a rest. Some women love to use their vaginas a lot, and that's cool if that's your thing. But you should also make time to give that monkey a rest. Too much sex can lead to a urinary tract infection (which is super painful), or a sexually transmitted infection. Hopefully, the horror stories associated with urinary tract infections will be enough to convince you to put that thing on ice every now and then.
- Take your vagina to the gym. A good workout can help tighten up your box, and it can also keep your “fluids" regular during sex. Here are some tips on how to get your Kegel exercises on.
- A dude hung like a horse won't ruin it. But it probably won't stop him from trying, and it probably won't stop you from letting him. Your vagina returns back to all its glory in size after sex, so relax.
- It's not supposed to taste or smell like cupcakes and ice cream. It's supposed to taste and smell like a vagina, no matter what your partner tells you. Stop letting them gas you up, and take Dr. Shelly's advice:
A healthy vagina ranges in taste from salty to tart to sour, depending on your cycle, diet, and lifestyle habits. Your vagina sweats just like your armpits. Have you ever eaten a meal heavy with garlic and noticed that your skin reeked of a garlic-y smell for a few days afterwards? Your diet can also affect your vaginal secretions.
If you want to avoid your vaginal secretions tasting bitter, avoid coffee, excessive amounts of sugar, red meat, most dairy products, cigarettes, alcohol, and recreational drugs.
If you want your vaginal secretions to taste sweeter, eat more leafy green vegetables, black beans, yogurt, fruits (especially strawberries, watermelon and pineapples), cardamom, mint, cranberry juice, cinnamon, and lots of water.
Related Post: How To Taste Sweeter Down There
But it's not supposed to smell like fish. No matter how many times your gay bff calls you “fish," it's not supposed to smell like it. Mayo Clinic says:
It's normal for your vagina to have a slight odor. But, a strong vaginal odor — for instance, a "fishy" smell — might be abnormal and could indicate a problem.An abnormal vaginal odor is usually associated with other vaginal signs and symptoms such as itching, burning, irritation or discharge.
- It's nothing to be embarrassed about. Asking your doctor or a trained professional about your lady parts is nothing to be embarrassed about. If someone makes you feel embarrassed about a part of your body that belongs to you, then you should consider the source, and the run away from that person as far as you can.
Your vagina is your own, and it's the only one you have. So take care of it, drink plenty of water, and treat it like the awesome prize that it is.
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ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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ItGirl 100: Get To Know Some Of The Most Inspiring And Empowering Women On Our List
The ItGirl 100 List, in partnership with Hyundai, is a celebration of 100 Black women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table.
We often see lists featuring amazing women who are seasoned in this thing called life, and our ItGirl 100 List gives flowers to the people they’ve passed the torch to: young millennial and Gen Z women who are innovating and disrupting in today’s world of advancement.
xoNecole has partnered with Hyundai for its inaugural ItGirl 100 List to give these women their flowers today. It’s a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who have built their own tables, launched new businesses, and redefined what it truly means to be blessed, booked, and busy.
Here’s a snapshot of fun facts from a few of the women listed on the ItGirl 100, representing the East, West, Midwest, and South:
EAST
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DJ 9AM: DJ & Curator
Representing: Brooklyn
Ultimate ItGirl Song: "On My Mama" by Victoria Monét
Favorite OG It Girl: Nia Long
Zodiac Big Three: Cancer Sun, Taurus Moon, Pisces Rising
Favoring open-format, multi-genre mixes, this DJ has created a winning reputation for rocking a crowd with seamless transitions and selections, always representing Southwest musical and cultural influences.
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Tiffany James, Founder, Modern BLK Girl
Representing:Brooklyn
Ultimate ItGirl Song: "Lucky Girl" by Carlina
Favorite OG It Girl:Naomi Campbell
Zodiac Big Three: Sagittarius Sun, Leo Moon, Virgo Rising
Modern BLK Girl is one of the leading investment groups among women of color, and the founder serves as an avid investor, community builder, and advocate. Tiffany James is also a mentor, utilizing her unique combination of financial and fashion expertise.
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Kat Mateo, Casting Director
Representing: New Jersey
Ultimate ItGirl Song: "Princess Going Digital" by Amaarae
Favorite OG It Girl: Kelis, Eve, Lil Kim
Zodiac Big Three: Aries Sun, Cancer Moon, Cancer Rising
Thriving as a casting director and stylist, Kat Mateo offers a unique point of view that has shaped New York Fashion Week shows, ad campaigns, and editorials. She has also been a major contributor to cultural conversations related to fashion and inclusivity.
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Denise Stephanie Hewitt, Photographer
Representing: Brooklyn
Ultimate ItGirl Song: "Experience" by Victoria Monét
Favorite OG It Girl: Hannah Montana
Zodiac Big Three: Taurus Sun, Aquarius Moon, Aquarius Rising
This Gordon Parks Foundation scholar is a full-time student who has been working to expand her freelance career in photography. Denise is also been featured among Essence'sinaugural list of "Top 10 Creators Under 30," for her unique aesthetics and perceptions through her art.
WEST
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Nayamka Roberts-Smith, Aesthetician
Representing: Los Angeles
Ultimate ItGirl Song: "Tomorrow 2" by GloRilla & Cardi B
Favorite OG It Girl: Meagan Good
Zodiac Big Three: Sagittarius Sun, Leo Moon, Capricorn Rising
Nayamka Roberts-Smith is an award-winning professional in the skincare industry and serves as an educator, offering knowledge on beauty culture. She also is a well-sought-after speaker on beauty and women’s issues, with a following of more than 1 million on social.
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Desiree L. Talley, Esq., Vice President, Legal & Business Affairs, Revolt TV
Representing: Los Angeles
Ultimate ItGirl Song: "Nice" by The Carters
Favorite OG It Girl: Issa Rae
Zodiac Big Three: Cancer Sun, Scorpio Moon, Cancer Rising
An attorney and storyteller, Desiree L. Talley meshes relatability with her legal smarts for the culture. She advocates for cultural advancement and societal change through her POPLAW Podcast while balancing her executive duties at Revolt TV.
Marley Rae
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Marley Rae, Organizer, WalkGood
Representing: Los Angeles
Ultimate ItGirl Song: "Nice For What" by Drake
Favorite OG It Girl: Mariah Carey
Zodiac Big Three: Capricorn Sun, Taurus Moon, Leo Rising
Marley Rae is a Nike Athlete, certified yoga instructor, COO, and Director of Health and Wellness for WalkGood LA, a family-founded non-profit organization. She is dedicated to fostering understanding and care in local and global communities.
MIDWEST
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Shawnee Dez
Representing: Chicago
Ultimate ItGirl Song: "FreeBody Freestyle" by Shawnee Dez
Favorite OG It Girl: Toni Morrison
Zodiac Big Three: Cancer Sun, Aquarius Moon, Cancer Rising
Shawnee Dez is an artist who's all about captivating her audience through encouragement and empowerment. Her music features fluid harmonic layering, live instrumentation fused with digital production, and her unique multi-talented voice in an alto melodic tone.
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Bianca Pastel, Visual Artist
Representing: Chicago
Ultimate ItGirl Song: Anything by Whitney Houston
Favorite OG It Girl: Grace Jones
Zodiac Big Three: Taurus Sun, Leo Moon, Sagittarius Rising
Bianca Pastel's artistic portfolio includes fine art, illustrations, and animation, and she's worked with clients including Disney Pixar, and the NFL, to name a few. Her focus is "empowering the experience of being a Black child and dealing with mental health issues."
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Donyale Walton, Founder, Hoop Mobb
Representing: Detroit
Ultimate ItGirl Song: "Yeah I Said It" by Rihanna
Favorite OG It Girl: Aaliyah
Zodiac Big Three: Virgo Sun, Libra Moon, Capricorn Rising
Donyale Walton's brand Hoop Mobb, celebrates the Black and Brown fashion and cultural impact and presence of hoop earrings. It's grown to earn more than seven figures in annual revenue and a nationwide community of loyal consumers.
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Ticara Devone, Content Creator
Representing: Chicago
Ultimate ItGirl Song: "She's a Bitch" by Missy Elliott
Favorite OG It Girl: Ananda Lewis
The Zodiac Big Three: Libra Sun, Taurus Moon, Virgo Rising
A trusted sneaker enthusiast and content creator, Ticara Devone uses dynamic storytelling to hold space for others with a passion for sneakers. A published writer, she’s worked with brands including Nike and Footlocker and inspires us all by ensuring women are vocal and seen in the multi-billion dollar shoe space.
SOUTH
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AllyiahsFace, Content Creator
Representing: Atlanta
Ultimate ItGirl Song: "Go Off" Doja Cat
Favorite OG It Girl: Gabrielle Union and Halle Berry
Zodiac Big Three: Gemini Sun, Leo Moon, Scorpio Rising
AllyiahsFace's YouTube channel has more than 830,000 subscribers, and she's been hitting the ground running since 2015. Her content creation, which centers on beauty, fashion, and lifestyle, has led to a lucrative career and drawn a close-knit social and real-life community to view and be inspired.
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Jaycina, Executive Director, Tender
Representing: Atlanta
Ultimate ItGirl Song: "All I Got" by Amel Larrieux
Favorite OG It Girl:Tracee Ellis Ross
Zodiac Big Three: Leo Sun, Sagittarius Moon, Sagittarius Rising
Jaycina is a signed model with a nonprofit that works to provide support and community for single mothers in Atlanta. She's also appeared in campaigns for brands including Fenty and GAP as well as features in all your favorite magazines and on billboards across the country.
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Asha Christian, Founder, Coily App
Representing: Atlanta
Ultimate ItGirl Song: "It's My Life" by Mariah Carey
Favorite OG It Girl: Toni Childs (Girlfriends)
Zodiac Big Three: Sagittarius Sun, Leo Moon, Leo Rising
Asha Christian created Coily to provide beauty recommendations utilizing social data. It offers a more personalized, AI-driven experience for users and part of her mission is to provide solutions related to diversity and put the focus back on the consumer. Meshing tech and culture, Christian is innovating with options that exemplify the Black girl magic needed in tech.
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