Ace Hood & Shelah Marie On How Partner Yoga Has Changed Their Relationship
Downward Forward Dog. Double Plow. Reclining Bound Angle.
No, these aren't names of kinky sex positions (although they can be), but yoga poses designed to help get your mind and body right. It's a practice that actress Shelah Marie and her boyfriend, rapper Ace Hood, know all too well. In fact, it's part of what caught my eye when a post of the couple went viral with the caption:
“Get yourself a black spiritual feminist from Erykah Badu Twitter and be happy like Ace Hood."
Hilarious!
It lead me to scour their Instagram pages, where images of Ace Hood—legs crossed, hands open in quiet meditation—graced his feed, while images of Shelah giving #bodygoals popped up with every downward scroll. I was certainly loving the cute selfies the couple took together, but it was an image of them meditating together that really stood out.
One, because seeing a rapper who's actually being still is freaking amazing. Outside of Russell Simmons and David Banner, I don't know too many hip hop artists who speak openly about meditation. Also, they both looked to be at such peace—with themselves, and one another.
While the physical benefits go well beyond the mat, it's the mental benefits that Shelah believes is essential to helping couples in and outside of the bedroom. “You have to sit and listen to yourself and be comfortable with yourself, and you also have to do the hard work. And I think yoga, when you practice sitting in a very uncomfortable position for a long period of time, that mindset is transferrable to other parts of your life."
Everyone is looking for that secret formula for a happy and fulfilling relationship. Great communication, willingness to compromise, and fulfilling your partner's needs are just a few tidbits that married couples have passed down to those of us who are single or navigating the murky waters of love. But what if someone told you the answer lies not just within your actions, but in your attitude? And that embracing the ancient practice of yoga can help prepare you for the trials and tribulations of relationships?
When Shelah first started doing yoga four years ago, her original intent was to get back into stretching to increase her flexibility. Although she's always been active in fitness, as she got older she started noticing a change in her body, and wanted to do something that would push her beyond her limits.
“I've always been interested in what you can do with you body, and I've always taken dance classes, so fitness is just an extension of me challenging myself physically and mentally and sharpening my tools."
Through meditation and discipline, Shelah continued to grow in all areas of her life, but it wasn't until her partner Ace Hood expressed interest in doing yoga that the practice begin to not only impact her life, but her relationship as well.
Shelah was admittedly surprised that Ace was open to yoga, mainly because of the stigma that yoga is a feminine practice, despite becoming more popular amongst males. But the artist, who is also athletic and does MMA training, was looking for something that would add stretching to his strenuous workouts. “Ace is an open person and he's very smart, so he can tune into when something can be good to you, and he's like I'll give it a try at least. But he was actually really interested in yoga before I introduced him he just never had the opportunity."
Not wanting to get his feet wet in a formal class (let's be real, it's can be distracting to be in a room of women contorting their bodies into unimaginable positions), Shelah reached out to a Racheal Weathers—a self-taught yoga guru who goes by Yoga Racheal, and who has gained a massive following on social media—who agreed to do private sessions with the couple while they were in Los Angeles for the summer.
“I followed her for like a year before that, and I remember thinking look what she's doing with her body! I'm attracted to people who do interesting things with their body, because it's a reflection of other things to me. I saw her discipline, she's super flexible, and can do all of these cool poses. She used to move me man," says Shelah.
The first session was intense. One that Racheal remembers being full of laughs and tears as the couple learned to come together as one through partner yoga. “When couples do [yoga] together, it's just total different connections. On a physical level, it's like if you do something wrong they're going to fall and vice versa. And the connection is just different; I feel like it taps into a whole other part of the brain, a whole other part of the emotional ecosystem in our bodies. It definitely creates a deeper connection," says Racheal.
Shelah accredits Racheal's soft style of leadership to making the session peaceful and productive. They pushed past their weaknesses and learned to be strong in areas where the other lacked. For Shelah, it was her core and arm strength that needed work. For Ace, his flexibility.
It also helped bring the couple closer together as they mastered each other's love languages. “I would say ultimately they're communication increased. Not that they had bad communication, but it got better and better," Racheal says.
And of course, adding to their sex life didn't hurt either.
“Intimacy happens in the mind first, so I think yoga helps you to become more in tuned with yourself," Shelah says. “When we're in tune with our own selves and become more comfortable with ourselves, then you become more comfortable with your partner."
Shelah also noticed a change in how Ace approached life. As a rapper, the “can't stop, won't stop" mantra is real. Running from show to show and in and out of studios at all hours of the night leaves little time for rest, and being in the game where everybody claims themselves to be hustlers, it's no wonder that sitting still can sometimes feel uncomfortable. But yoga forced Ace Hood to slow down, breathe, and take a moment to get his thoughts together. Now it's nothing for him to wake up and sit in silence for 10 minutes before paper chasing.
Shelah says in awe of her partner, “I think he's so brave. I used to tell him that in the beginning, just being with a black girl who has natural hair and not being afraid to go out and meditate, I think it's brave for somebody in his position. He's going to wake the game up and let them know what time it is!"
As far as the overall impact to their relationship? “I would say it changed many parts of our relationship. The fundamental idea of yoga, if I understand correctly, is yoga and meditation are together. Because it takes the meditation to soothe yourself and actual tangible actions that you have to do. And that's why it's beneficial for a couple because it goes both ways."
As the saying goes, couples who sweat together, stay together—great sex is just a bonus.
- Shelah Marie Ace Hood Marriage - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
- Yoga Sex Positions: Poses That Improve Your Sex Life - xoNecole: Women's Interest, Love, Wellness, Beauty ›
- The Best Yoga Poses For An Emotional Release - xoNecole: Lifestyle, Culture, Love, & Wellness ›
- Ace Hood & Shelah Marie's Wedding Was Everything! - xoNecole: Lifestyle, Culture, Love, Wellness ›
- Principle-Based Partner Yoga with Elysabeth Williamson ›
- 7 Benefits Of Partner Yoga + 5 Poses To Get You Started ›
- 7 Couples Yoga Poses for Beginners That'll Bring You Closer ... ›
- PARTNER YOGA POSES FOR BEGINNERS - YouTube ›
- Partner Yoga | YogaGlo ›
- 10 partner yoga poses for building intimacy | Well+Good ›
- 10 Yoga Poses to Do with a Partner - Health ›
- @theshelahmarie • Instagram photos and videos ›
- Shelah Marie ›
- Shelah Marie (@ShelahMarie) | Twitter ›
- ABOUT — Soul Study with Shelah ›
- Curvy, Curly, Conscious ›
- Meditation Mixtape by Shelah Marie on Spotify ›
Kiah McBride writes technical content by day and uses storytelling to pen real and raw personal development pieces on her blog Write On Kiah. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter at @writeonkiah.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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How A Stay At Switzerland's Luxurious 7132 Hotel Reminded Me To Live The Life I Deserve
Sometimes, as women—especially as single Black women—we simply need to be reminded that we are deserving of living a life we dream of. Even if that means creating it for ourselves. I recently set out on a weeklong trip to Switzerland, a trip I’ve been wanting to take for years, and near the end of my visit, I had an epiphany.
“DeAnna, this is the life you deserve,” I thought to myself as I took in the gorgeous bathroom in my suite at the famous 7132 Hotel and Thermal Spa. It was one of the most luxurious hotels (and bathrooms) I had ever stayed in—and that’s saying a lot for someone who often travels for work.
To help you better understand why this was such a mental awakening for me, I first need to give a bit of my backstory. I’m in my late thirties. I’m an attorneyand a journalist. I own a home and have traveled the world extensively. Essentially, I’ve done everything in life I set out to do. However, when it comes to dating, I struggle. Not because there is anything wrong with me per se, but because my career and “lifestyle” often create problems in my romantic relationships.
View from my hotel room
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I’ve been told everything from, ‘I can’t continue to date you because you seem to choose your career over wanting to settle down and have kids’ by a man after only the second date to ‘Maybe if you just sat down somewhere for a while, I’d actually wife you’ by someone who has honestly never proven themselves to be the settle down type. And these are only a handful of the things I’ve been told over the years.
It’s been frustrating, to say the least, and there have even been seasons where I purposely dimmed my light in hopes that my career wouldn’t push away potential suitors. I know what you’re thinking, “Girl, why would you even consider that? If they’re for you, it won’t matter what you do.” Hey, don’t judge me, but also, I one hundred percent agree.
My hotel bathroom
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That’s why this recent moment in Switzerland was right on time. When I first walked into the hotel to check in, I was blown away by the surrounding beauty. It was a five-star property with one of the world’s most famous thermal bathhouses. Yet, it was something about seeing that 90% of the hotel’s guests were couples, that forced me to sit back for a bit of introspection—while soaking in the thermal spa, of course.
As I went through the mental conversation, there was a battle of sorts. On one hand, I knew that being able to partake in experiences like the one I was having at that moment was important to me. I knew that, at times I actually love being able to dabble in the finer things—after all, I’ve worked hard to be able to afford them. On the other hand, and sadly, I knew that sometimes being a single Black woman that publicly showcases her “luxurious” habits can intimidate men and even scare them off from pursuing you under the guise of them feeling like they “can’t do anything for you, because you have everything.”
My hotel room
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So, what is a girl to do?
Do I minimize/hide the life and experiences that I have? Do I play down the hard work I’ve put in to get where I am professionally? Or, do I risk being single in exchange for being able to have said life, without backlash?
Luckily, the joy that I felt while being at this property won. There was something about taking a full day to simply pamper myself at the bathhouse and in my in-room steam shower and soaker tub, indulging in cuisine from a 2-star Michelin restaurant and doing all of this while surrounded by an amazing group of Black women that reminded me—this is certainly the life I was meant to live and that I deserve. Even if it means that right now, I’ll just have to provide it for myself until the right partner comes along. And honestly, I’m okay with that.
Restaurant at 7132 hotel
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