Meet The Nurse Practitioner Who Has The Secret To Making Six Figures A Year
Money Talks is an xoNecole series where we talk candidly to real women about how they spend money, their relationship with money, and how they spend it.
When you think of a nurse practitioner, you may think of the extras from Grey's Anatomy staged behind Jesse Williams. However, this specific one is doing anything but taking a backseat in the audience, especially when it comes to her finances. 44-year-old Princess Lomax is a family nurse practitioner by day and a sports bar owner at night, all while juggling and maintaining her doctoral candidacy at Valparaiso University. Lomax is conducting in-home assessments for the Medicare population and is the proud owner of Diamonds Sports Bar & Grill, so it's no wonder why she's able to write a book on taking your career to the next level.
Courtesy of Princess Lomax
The Atlanta-based serial entrepreneur's best-selling Amazon book 6 Highly Effective Strategies For Making 6 Figures As A Nurse is a compilation of real-life accounts and experiences of entrepreneurship while becoming a nurse. If you're a young Black woman in the healthcare industry looking to elevate your career beyond the examination room and medical jargon, it might be the read for you.
In this installment of "Money Talks," xoNecole spoke with the Chicago-bred nurse practitioner, real estate investor, and bonafide hustler about making well over six figures a year, splurging on her half a million-dollar home and flipping houses as an extra stream of revenue.
On how much she saves per month:
"Right now, I don't have a set goal for saving on a monthly basis, however, I'm in the process of setting up a portfolio that will allow me to start having money automatically deducted from my account that will go towards an IRA and money for investing in stocks."
On her definitions of wealth and success:
"I define wealth as the power to acquire whatever you desire and the power to put other people in positions to become successful. Being wealthy for me is about putting measures in place so that everybody around me can become wealthy also. I have the desire to uplift and motivate the people around me so that we can attain generational wealth and break generational curses.
"I define success as accomplishing and attaining the goals you've set for yourself. Success for me is a never-ending cycle because I'm always thinking of a master plan to achieve something higher than my last accomplishment. Not that I'm never satisfied, but I always push myself to a higher level that surpasses my current level. It's always me against me. I'm always striving to defeat the old me so that my success will continue to grow."
On the lowest she’s ever felt when it came to her finances and how she overcame it:
"I was born poor and raised in the heart of the ghetto so it doesn't get any lower than that. There were times growing up when I wasn't sure where my next meal was coming from. I didn't have the luxury of heat and hot water, so figuring out where I would bath from day to day was once a lifestyle I endured.
"I overcame being poor by thinking rich and pushing myself until I no longer had to figure out where my next meal was going to come from. I sometimes still have fears of not being able to eat, which is why I continue to grind like my next meal is depending on it. I sometimes have flashbacks of my struggling childhood and pray that God continues to bless me so that I will never have to endure those hardships again. So for me, I overcame it by never forgetting my struggle and by pushing myself on a daily basis to stay on top."
Courtesy of Princess Lomax
"I overcame being poor by thinking rich and pushing myself until I no longer had to figure out where my next meal was going to come from. I sometimes still have fears of not being able to eat, which is why I continue to grind like my next meal is depending on it. I sometimes have flashbacks of my struggling childhood and pray that God continues to bless me so that I will never have to endure those hardships again."
On her biggest splurge to date:
"My latest biggest splurge was the purchase of my new home which was over a half of million dollars. Splurging in the past for me has been the purchasing of Chanel bags, Christian Louboutins, and expensive cars. This year, God has allowed me to level up and splurge in a different way. I'm now a homeowner so my splurging this year has been phenomenal."
On whether she’s a spender or a saver:
"Unfortunately, I am a spender and sometimes wish I was a saver. Growing up poor and not having much of anything and not having anyone in my life to teach me about saving has unfortunately hindered me from being a saver. At one point, I was spending more than I was making, but as my entrepreneurship continues to grow, I'm learning how to save and plan for retirement. I'm still in the process of training myself to save and not spend. My training has just begun and plans for my future and retirement are at the beginning stages."
Courtesy of Princess Lomax
"Growing up poor and not having much of anything and not having anyone in my life to teach me about saving has unfortunately hindered me from being a saver. At one point, I was spending more than I was making, but as my entrepreneurship continues to grow, I'm learning how to save and plan for retirement. I'm still in the process of training myself to save and not spend."
On her savings goals and what retirement looks like to her:
"My saving goal is to save a minimum of $20K a month so that I can retire by the age of 50. Retirement for me as a Nurse Practitioner will be within the next 5-10 years and I don't think I'll really ever retire as an entrepreneur."
On the importance of investing:
"Most of my money has been attained via investing, so investing is extremely important to me. I've learned that if I invest in the right assets, my portfolio during retirement will be prosperous. I invest in real estate purchases and acquiring businesses. I invest mostly in real estate in the Chicagoland area and also invest in multiple businesses that will become great assets in the near future."
On her intentions behind multiple streams of revenue:
"My streams of revenue were established by buying and flipping houses and by owning and operating a successful nightclub and sports bar in the Chicagoland area. Having multiple streams of income became a way of life for me after having slow periods with both real estate and the nightlife industry. Having multiple streams of income has allowed me to continue to be successful without having too many periods of dry spells without income coming in."
On unhealthy money habits and mindsets:
"The number one unhealthy habit that I had to restructure is feeling like I always had to go shopping for the latest Chanel bag and or the latest pair of Christian Louboutins. Once I changed my mindset, I saw the bigger picture for saving and investing more. I now know that I can still look and be great while attending parties and/or events without having to buy a new pair of shoes and or a new bag."
Courtesy of Princess Lomax.
"My streams of revenue were established by buying and flipping houses and by owning and operating a successful nightclub and sports bar in the Chicagoland area. Having multiple streams of income has allowed me to continue to be successful without having too many periods of dry spells without income coming in."
On her money mantra:
"Keep God first and don't ever allow the money to change who you are on the inside."
On desperate times calling for desperate measures:
"Yes, yes, and hell yes. I'm not proud of some of the things I've done in my past for financial gain, however, it has been a part of making me the successful female CEO that I am today. "
On the worst money-related decision she’s ever made:
"The worst money-related decision I ever made was not to invest early-on in stocks. I truly feel that if I had invested in stocks like Amazon instead of buying shoes and bags, my portfolio would be near retirement by now."
On her budget breakdown:
How much do you spend on rent?
"I'm a homeowner now, which allows me to spend less on [a] mortgage than I was paying on renting. $4,000 month."
Eating out/ordering in?
"Both $500 per month."
Gas/car note?
"$2,000 per month."
Personal expenses?
"$3,000 per month."
For more of Princess, check out her website.
Featured image courtesy of Princess Lomax
Originally published on October 9, 2020
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ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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When discussing the topic of raising children, discipline is often the first thing that comes to mind. Children need discipline. Full stop. But what is discipline? And how do we draw the line between discipline and revenge?
The origin of the word "discipline" can be traced back to the Latin word "disciplina," which means "instruction" or "teaching." Over time, however, discipline has come to be synonymous with punishment, with parents relying on shame, fear, and/or physical pain to curb undesirable behavior.
Teaching takes time, so nipping it in the bud in whatever fashion parents deem necessary (within reason) has become the norm. But is this what’s best for children? And when does it become less about curbing undesirable behavior and more about getting our licks back for offenses we feel our children should know better to do?
In my work as a parenting coach, I’ve often heard parents say, “I asked him nicely three times before spanking him. He didn’t stop doing it until I did, so clearly talking doesn’t work.”
And the parent isn’t wrong. Talking often doesn’t work the first, the third, or the even the 10th time. And the reason is directly tied to brain development.
Children cannot and do not process information the way an adult can. Auditory processing is not fully developed until a child is 14 or 15 years old. And even then, if a child has auditory processing delays or Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), they may always struggle with processing auditory commands. According to Susie S. Loraine, MA, CCC-SLP, the term auditory processing refers to how the brain perceives and interprets sound information. Several skills determine auditory processing ability—or listening success. They develop in a general four-step hierarchy, but all work together and are essential for daily listening.
Without this understanding, discipline can easily become revenge because parents will then view their child’s misdeeds as a personal slight. Instead of teaching them to do better, parents now want to show them the consequences of not doing better. This is why it's imperative for parents to discern between discipline and revenge to maintain healthy relationships with their children.
5 WAYS TO DISTINGUISH BETWEEN PARENTAL GUIDANCE AND RETALIATION:
Understanding The Intent
Discipline is rooted in love and concern for the child's well-being. It focuses on teaching lessons and helping children understand the consequences of their actions. Conversely, revenge-driven actions stem from a desire to inflict pain or punishment as payback for perceived slights or disobedience. Parents should reflect on their motives before taking disciplinary actions. Ask yourself whether your intention is to help your child learn or to make them suffer for upsetting you.
Example: If a child accidentally breaks a valuable item, a disciplinary response would involve discussing the importance of being careful and working with the child to come up with a way to replace or fix what they’ve broken. On the other hand, a vengeful reaction might involve yelling, harsh punishment, or bringing up past mistakes to intensify guilt.
Maintaining Emotional Regulation
Effective discipline requires parents to remain calm and composed, even in challenging situations. It's natural to feel upset or frustrated when children misbehave, but responding with anger or resentment can escalate the situation and blur the line between discipline and revenge. Before addressing the issue, take a moment to breathe and collect your thoughts.
Example: If a child cannot follow instructions, a disciplined response would involve calmly explaining why their cooperation is necessary in working with the child to accomplish the goal. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve shouting, name-calling, or resorting to physical punishment out of anger.
Promoting Growth and Learning
Discipline should always aim to promote growth and learning. It involves guiding children toward making better choices and understanding the impact of their actions on themselves and others. Effective discipline strategies include positive reinforcement, setting clear expectations, and providing opportunities for reflection and growth.
Example: If a child repeatedly forgets to complete their chores, a disciplinary approach would involve discussing the importance of responsibility and finding solutions together, such as creating a chore chart or setting reminders with Siri or Alexa. In contrast, a revenge-driven response might involve imposing overly harsh punishments or belittling the child, which can undermine their self-esteem and hinder their ability to learn from their mistakes.
Momo Productions/Getty
Building Trust and Communication
Trust and open communication are essential components of a healthy parent-child relationship. Discipline should strengthen this bond by fostering trust and encouraging children to confide in their parents without fear of judgment or retaliation. When children feel safe and supported, they're more likely to accept discipline as a form of guidance rather than punishment.
Example: If a child admits to breaking a rule or making a mistake, a disciplined response would involve listening to their perspective, discussing the consequences of their actions, and working together to find a solution. Conversely, a retaliatory response might involve accusations, blame, or shutting down communication, which can erode trust and damage the parent-child relationship.
Seeking Professional Guidance
Parenting is a learning journey, and, disciplining children is a delicate balance between guiding them toward responsible behavior and nurturing their growth. By understanding the intent behind our actions, maintaining emotional regulation, promoting growth and learning, building trust and communication, and seeking professional guidance when needed, as parents we can help our children built on love, respect, and understanding.
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Featured image by Courtney Hale/Getty Images