How Maya Washington Built An Empire On Shameless Self-Promotion
For YouTube star Shameless Maya, each day starts off just like any other nine-to-fiver. Born Maya Washington, the Toronto-native/LA-transplant wakes up at 6:30 a.m. to read the Bible, squeezes in a session with her personal trainer, then beats her face for the gods before heading off to work.
By 10 a.m., the spirited social media personality is swimming in a pile of emails, pre-production planning, and video shoots. "Before we shoot anything, we gotta come up with ideas and storyboard, then we send it to get approved [by brands]. We go buy what we need, take photos, flat lay it, then send it for approval. There's a bunch of back and forth about the final edit. They want me to cut this out, they wanna cut that out. I would say, it's maybe two or three rounds of edits."
It's all in a day's work for this 34-year-old creative producer.
"I thought it was cheesy, tacky, and shameless," she says of her YouTube beginnings. "I went into it as a social media experiment on what would happen if I was shameless of a year and see where it would take me." And it truly paid off.
Since starting her channel in 2012, Washington's ability to be transparent with her followers about personal topics, such as her divorce and why she ultimately decided to shave her head, has helped her snag a following of millions of subscribers across her social media platforms. Her brightly colored beauty tutorials, inspirational online diary entries, and informative tech reviews keep her rolling in dough. Most recently, she has collaborated with brands such as Target, CoverGirl, and Google Store. In 2014, she landed an opportunity of a lifetime as art director for Prince's Art Official Age album. While she doesn't disclose the amount she was paid by The Purple One, in a video, she says, "I hadn't ever seen money like that at this point in my life."
Don't Knock the Hustle
It's evident that being a YouTube star can lead to a pretty comfortable lifestyle. However, there's a common misconception that living life in front of the camera is all play and no work. Flip on a camera, turn on your charm and get paid, right? Well, not so much. Along with extensive planning, especially for branded content, Washington sometimes has to fight for creative control. "I had one brand tell me to stop saying 'homegirl' and 'boo.' I was so frustrated, like, no, you can't tell me what I can and can't say. That's how I talk to my viewers. I had to learn to stand up for myself because it's my voice."
While dealing with brands and cashing checks can be tough, the hardest career challenge for Washington is learning to lead. There's a learning curve in evolving from independent worker to operating a full-fledged brand. "I don't like telling people what to do," she admits. "I've never had a manager position in life. Like, I've never been a supervisor or anything of that. I've always been kind of like a worker bee. I'd work for companies as a production assistant or an intern, so to go from those types of positions to working by myself was challenging. I have to study and read books on how to be a leader."
To balance out her weaknesses, this HBIC is building a strong team and learning how to delegate day-to-day tasks. While positive energy is the number one requirement for people on her Shameless squad, there are a few other major keys to success in Maya's World. "Are you hustler and do you work hard? There's so much to be done when you start off small. I do everything, so I'm looking for someone who is down to do everything and then some. I have issues with organization and staying on top of my calendar, so I needed someone who is exceptionally detail-oriented, which I found. I like thinking outside of the box, too, so if you have other passions, it's a plus."
Before the YouTube Fame
Though Washington seems to have it all––the money, the career, and, the squad––for a long time, her relationship status still read single.
At the age of 22, she met the man who would become her husband and they married when she was 26. Unfortunately, their marriage succumbed to their differences in life goals and five years later, the curly girl finally got a divorce. While recovering from her heartbreak, she threw all her energy into her work. It was not only a much-needed distraction from her rocky romantic life, but also a time to for her to heal as a woman.
"A lot of people when they leave relationships, they rebound," she says. "You go on dates and try to distract yourself. And that's part of it. But once you get all of that outta your system, you have to look inward and figure out how to be the best person you can be. You can distract yourself, but know that if you do that, you're gonna run into issues. I was so angry and always coming into confrontations. I literally had to reprogram everything about me. I'm genuinely happy with the woman I've become and now I can say I'm ready to date."
Braving the world of Tinder swipes and first dates seems pretty daunting, but Washington is equipped with the biggest lesson she's learned from her failed marriage. "When I got married, I was making decisions based on feelings, but as an adult, I have to do a checklist before I allow myself to get carried away. Do you have a good family background? Are you a positive, happy person? Do you believe in God? I have to check all those things off. Because once you let your feelings go, it's game over. Before you let your heart get carried away, take your brain with you."
No matter what's ahead, Washington is passionate about inspiring and spreading her youthful joy. And who can even be mad at that? Be shameless and do you, boo!
Find out more about Shameless Maya by following her on YouTube!
Originally published in 2016
Images courtesy of Maya Washington
Niki McGloster is a Maryland-based writer and co-founder of her sweat. She has written for ESSENCE, Genius, Billboard, VIBE and Teen Vogue. Follow her on Twitter at @missjournalism.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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I think we all can agree that social media really is a double-edged sword. What I mean by that is there is just as much bad that can come out of it as good. At the end of the day, it really is about 1) having your own mind, 2) finding balance when it comes to how much time you spend online, and 3) doing your own research instead of taking random people’s opinions as the gospel (i.e., facts).
Gee, I wish more folks did all of this when it comes to if a man needs to have a large penis to sexually satisfy a woman (he does not) and if a woman who has had multiple sex partners will ultimately end up with a vagina that is too large for smaller penises to please her (a lie).
Science totally has my back on debunking both of those things (more on that in a bit). Know what else does? A particular type of sex method that is becoming more popular by the day. One that just might convince you to, as they used to say back in the day, focus less on the “size of the wave” and ride out the “motion of the ocean” instead.
It’s called shallowing. Here’s what it’s all about.
What Is Shallowing?
GiphyIf there’s one thing that I wish folks would say more thoroughly when it comes to women and orgasms, it’s that when it comes to75 percent of women not being able to orgasm from only intercourse, the accurate statement is they struggle with achieving a vaginal orgasm without the assistance of some type of clitoral stimulation. Yeah, we’ve really got to remember that very few things in this life are a complete monolith — orgasms included (check out “U-Spot Orgasm, Fantasy Orgasm & 6 Other Orgasms You Should Try Tonight”).
In fact, it was while I was reading up on pairing — a word that is used for when clitoral stimulation transpires during penetration — that I decided to do some deep-diving into shallowing (because it was mentioned inone of the articles that I read).And what is it? Shallowing is when a penis, finger, tongue, or sex toy of some sort is used in order to ever so slightly penetrate the vaginal opening of a woman.
And why is shallowing not just a current sex trend but something that every woman on this planet should try? It’s because of what I’ve said, more than once, on this platform: it focuses on the most sensitive part of a woman’s vagina, which isthe first two inches of her vaginal opening.
When the emphasis is placed there, not only does it increase your chances of experiencing “the big O,” but it can also build up anticipation, which can intensify your orgasms too — yes, shallowing can also be seen as a form of edging.
Another thing that’s cool about shallowing is — and it really and truly can’t be said enough — something that makes vaginal and blended orgasms easier to achieve for some women really has little to do with the size of a man’s package or even his technique; it’s straight up anatomy. Yep, the closer that a woman’s clitoris is to her vaginal opening, the easier it is for a penis to stimulate both. So, science makes it possible for vaginal orgasms to be easier for some women than others.
At the same time, shallowing can make it possible for more women who want to see what a vaginal orgasm actually feels like (because it’s easier for the head of the penis to stimulate the opening of the vagina while the shaft can rub up against your clitoris; based on the position that you are in, of course — the missionary with some pillows propped under the lower part of your back is ideal for this).
Now that you see what shallowing actually is, do you get why I said that penis size doesn’t matter when it comes to doing it — and getting the kind of orgasms that you want? Contrary to popular belief, your vagina is only around four inches. In fact, some health experts say that it ranges between 2-4”. Anything larger, your body literally has to stretch out to accommodate; this includes penises and babies. So, if your vagina is “making room” for more than four inches, why in the world do you think you need a 10-inch man? Yeah…exactly. It really is time to get over the silliness. The average penis continues to be 5.5”. Makes sense when you take it all in (no pun intended).
Aight, so now that you know what shallowing is all about, let me try and hard sell you on why it’s a sex technique that you should try as soon as tonight (if you possibly can).
1. It takes the pressure off of you and your partner.
I’ve been working with couples for almost 20 years at this point. This means that the topic of sex comes up quite a bit. And if there’s one thing that continues to be an issue is inconsistent orgasms (check out “Why Do Orgasms So Often Seem Like A ‘Hit-Or-Miss’ Experience For Women?”).
Listen, no matter how many articles you read or sex positions you try, if you’re anxious, stressed out, or overthinking, it’s gonna get in the way of you experiencing high peaks of pleasure on a consistent basis. Since shallowing is something that can easily be done even in foreplay (via fingering and/ororal sex) if you get that first “release” off, that makes it easier to just sit back and enjoy the ones that (hopefully) are to follow.
2. It teaches you more about your vagina.
A part of the reason why I keep repeating certain facts about vaginas in these articles is that it’s amazing how little certain things are discussed en masse — like the size of the vaginal tube. And since shallowing helps you to stimulate the nerve endings at the entrance of your va-jay-jay along with your G-spot (which is housed a little ways from your opening), shallowing is a great way to explore that area of your body as you figure out what truly works for you and…what doesn’t.
3. It’s the perfect merging of foreplay and intercourse.
When you really stop to think about it, shallowing is like the bridge between foreplay and intercourse because you can use so many different things to do it. So, if you want to experiment with a new sex toy or you want a bit more time to “warm up the engine” before full-on penetration begins, shallowing is one of the most sexually arousing compromises there is.
4. It can help to increase your partner’s stamina.
A few years back, I penned an article for the site entitled, “We’ve Got Some All-Natural Ways To Increase Stamina & Sensitivity.” Listen, even though I onceread a GQ article that said that over 60 percent of the people they polled were fine with intercourse lasting no longer than 5-10 minutes — that poll doesn’t speak for all of us, chile.
So, if you would like your man to build up to going longer, shallowing can help to make that happen. Since he’s barely putting beyond the tip in, he can learn how to be in you for longer periods of time without being, well, in you.
5. It helps you to appreciate whatever “package” he has.
Again — and it really can’t be said enough — if shallowing is all about exploring the mere entrance of your vagina, you don’t need a man with BDE (check out “BDE: Please Let The 'It Needs To Be Huge' Myth Go”) or honestly, even anything close to it.
I mean, even though, reportedly, the size that the average woman says gives her the most orgasms is eight inches — I bet those women have never really tried shallowing before. 10”, 8”, or the average 5.5” can certainly get the job done. And well.
6. It feels A-MAZ-ING.
Okay,so now that you know about shallowing, I promise that if you put the word into your favorite search engine, you’re either gonna see articles on golfing (LOL) or sex, especially as of late. That’s because more couples are trying it out and getting mind-blowing results from it. So, if you’re looking for something new to try, give shallowing a shot.
Hey, anything that’s designed to stimulate your most intense vaginal nerve endings has got to be something for the record books. I mean, how could it not be? Lawd.
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Featured image by Juan Moyano/Getty Images