10 Things They Forget To Tell You About Pregnancy And Childbirth
Pregnancy is the gift that just keeps on giving, but let us be clear on what some of those "gifts" are.
As mothers and/or women who plan to be mothers, the goal with any pregnancy is, of course, to ultimately give birth to a healthy baby. A well-baked, 10 fingers and toes, 6 lbs+, baby boy or girl is clearly a blessing all in its own.
But let's get to the battle of our bodies that brings upon such blessings, shall we?While pregnant with North West, Kim Kardashian was very honest about edema and the levels of discomfort incurred from her body adjusting to the excessive weight gain and fluid retention. She revealed later that pregnancy just wasn't as sexy as some expecting moms in Hollywood made it out to be:
"I'm gonna keep it real: For me, pregnancy is the worst experience of my life! LOL! I don't enjoy one moment of it and I don't understand people who enjoy it. My mom and Kourtney clearly did! More power to them but I just don't relate. Maybe it's the swelling, the backaches or just the complete mindf-ck of how your body expands and nothing fits. I just always feel like I'm not in my own skin. It's hard to explain. I don't feel sexy, either -- I feel insecure and most of the time I just feel gross.
"People just don't tell you all of the gross things that happen during pregnancy or after. Do you know you basically have to wear a diaper for two months afterwards?! LOL! No one told me that! #SoSexy."
Radio Personality Miss Info also said she had some adjusting of her own to do in an Instagram post she wrote while pregnant with her son:
"Contrary to what Pinterest preaches, #pregnancy isn't all glam, glow, and thicker hair, lol. But so far I've had enough grad-level learning, and hilarious TMI struggle to fill a book!"
However, for the rest of us who are hoping to be better prepared (or who are just curious), I created a list of things that they don't tell you about pregnancy and childbirth. We already know about the tender breasts, weight gain, heartburn, and possible fluid retention that makes us look like a fluffy, pregnant Pokemon. But as far as the rest, you may want to take a look at this.
Here are the 10 Things They Don't Tell You About Being Pregnant and Childbirth:
1. Oh Spit!
Spitting happens while pregnant. For some, a lot. For others, none at all. But it happens and it's normal.
Although doctors have not found a direct link to the excessive spitting and being pregnant, some suspect that it's a hormonal thing and/or a result of the constant feeling of nausea (which varies per experience) that of course results in your salivary glands acting up. Be warned though, sometimes barfing does follow.
2. 'Roid Rage
And we're not talking steroids! Be clear that up to 50% of women are effected by Hemorrhoids when pregnant. What are thoooooosse you ask?
Well, for most of us, we know what hemorrhoids are (be it by experience or just common knowledge) but in case you don't:
Hemorrhoids are little veins in and around your rectum that can become swollen due to the strain of your growing uterus and increased blood flow.
Sometimes constipation (another culprit of being pregnant) are the cause of these too. They look like excessive, hanging pieces of swollen skin around your- uh, anus. The effects can either be that they itch or they hurt or both. But the good news? The issue usually goes away after childbirth (ouch though!).
3. Tinkle-Bell
Baby on the bladder! You might have heard of women having to pee a lot during pregnancy but what you may not know is that sometimes you can't hold it!
Your bladder sits directly under your uterus so as your womb-mate grows, the bladder can't always handle the pressure. This may result in an ease to pee from such simple activities as: sneezing or coughing, so be careful!
Just remember the cardinal rule: If you sprinkle while you tinkle, be a sweetie and wipe your seat-y (unless that seat is a couch, then you may be out of luck)!
4. Bleeding Gums...
Yep! Your gums may bleed...and just like spit, it's totally normal (what your baby has to do with your mouth I have no clue, but apparently things get crazy up in there)!
In this case, doctors do know the cause of this though is the female hormone, Progesterone.
5. Baby Got "Black"
This is not a bad side effect at all, but it might be one that most didn't know! You might notice a bit of change in your color while pregnant. This is because hormones amp up your melanin cells, the result of which you may produce more pigment, which will darken your areolas, freckles (if you have any), and more than likely, it will cause that mysterious line that runs from your belly button to your southern region, known as as the "linea nigra." You may also get blotchy skin, known medically as "Chloasma."
Hyperpigmentation tends to be more noticeable in women with darker complexions and typically fades post-birth. But in the meantime, consider it as your little baby picasso using your body as a canvas and coloring you from the inside out (isn't that a cute way to imagine it?).
And now, for the post-birth!
6. Pregnancy Fog
Pregnancy fog is for real. Some women have it so bad that they they can't remember basic sentence structure, let alone simple tasks.
In one Internet forum, one woman said that she forgot everything the doctor told her about her pregnancy symptoms, and would Google her ailments instead of calling her doctor. The result? She thought she was legitimately dying.
According to the Bible of pregnancy (What To Expect When Expecting), pregnancy fog is a result of your hormones having some fun with you at your expense. Also, lack of sleep due to the baby kicking your bladder all night, as well as decreased energy, can contribute to pregnancy fog.
7. The Mucus Plug
A mucus plug is literally what it sounds like--a huge thing of mucus that sort of holds together and clogs up your cervix to ensure that the "water" (your placenta) that you're toting stays together and doesn't drip until due. Post-birth and post your water breaking, you will also lose your mucus plug, but it may take anywhere from a few hours to a few days. Somewhat grossly enough, this can mean your body discharging wad amounts of mucus for some time to come (cue the adult diapers or the "O.G." lady pads).
**Note: Diapers for moms after birth are not always necessary and vary from mom to mom and from reason to reason. Some nurses even give women who have severe hemorrhoids a diaper full of ice to help cool down the discomfort of the swelling in/around their anus. Yikes!
8. Bowel Movements...Oh Crap!
So... if you didn't know, 12-36 hours of pushing a baby might "move" out some other thangs too. Yes, this includes the movement of your bowels and yes, this may happen in a room of people.
Everyone talks about how you're likely to make number two in front of your doctors, nurses, man, and family and friends (whoever is allowed in the delivery room, luckily only but so many people are, but still, one is one too many when you think of pooping), but take it from moms--you will not care one bit about what comes out of your booty while you're pushing that baby.
However, some moms have said that having a child, especially for the first time, puts their body in so much shock that they psych themselves out when it comes to having to use the bathroom after--meaning they become constipated because they are so traumatized from all that pushing just moments prior. Plus, with the stitches, some women and are so scared of the pain because everything-- and we mean everything-- hurts while your body adjusts to birthing a watermelon out of a needle's hole.
9. Speaking of Stitches
Usually, your doctor will chat with you about an episiotomy, just in case you may need one. An episiotomy is a surgical cut made at the opening of the vagina during childbirth to aid a difficult delivery and prevent rupture of tissues. In other words, it's when the doctor clips your cha-cha to make room for that watermelon head to come out of your vagina.
Don't worry, this too shall heal. But in the meantime, this too shall hurt more than a little bit (and you thought the baby being delivered was the end-all, be all. Sorry but, heck naw!).
Whatever you do, please don't Google an episiotomy. Just ask your doctor about it if they have not talked with you yet, and know that those battle scars will heal just as well!
10. Placenta aka The "Afterbirth"
Oh, you thought it was over.
But wait, there's more.
All of your placenta has to come out after birth. No seriously, if it stays, it can infect and harm you. It doesn't sound so bad, but if you are fatigued from delivery and your body can't push anymore, your practitioner may have to forcibly push down on your abdomen region to evacuate the excess fluid.
The plus side (and strange side), it may cause damage to stay in, but once it's out, it can be ingested (yes, you can consume your own placenta), and the health benefits are endless.
Seems like a lot but, take it from a more than a few moms: it is all worth it! And many women experience a postnatal-warrior vibe after giving birth, something that only a badass, mommy-gene can provide.
What are some of your thoughts and experiences on pregnancy and childbirth?
- Adult diapers after delivery? - BabyCenter ›
- This Mom Shared A Picture Of Herself In A Diaper To Show What ... ›
- The Best Postpartum Pads for the First Six Weeks | Mother Rising ›
- An All Natural Postpartum Survival Kit | Mother Rising ›
- Adult diapers for labor and postpartum, seriously?! Frozen wet pads ... ›
A modest goddess who keeps it humble between mumbles. I'm a journalism graduate with a HERstory in digital media, print and radio. Roll the credits: Power 96, VH1, xoNecole, EBONY, SOHH. Deemed "Top 20 Women in Media" by Power 105. Bronx made me, Broward raised me.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Kendrick Lamar And Whitney Alford: A Timeline Of Their Decades-Long Relationship
Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford are one of those couples who like to live their lives outside of the public eye. Unlike many celebrity couples, we don’t really hear a lot of details about their relationship in blogs and social media except for when Kendrick raps about it. Whitney has even been featured on many of her fiancé’s songs, but it was his last album, Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers, where he was the most vulnerable.
Outside of supporting her Pulitzer Prize-winning man, Whitney is also a licensed esthetician and makeup artist. The couple share two beautiful children together and seem to enjoy their privacy. From high school sweethearts to starting a family, here is a timeline of Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford’s relationship.
2001-2005?: Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford Meet
Whitney Alford and Kendrick Lamar at 2016 Key to the City Ceremony
Photo by Johnny Nunez/Getty Images
Kendrick and Whitney met in high school. However, there’s not a lot of details about what year. The two attended Centennial High School, which is located in Compton, CA, and began dating shortly after becoming friends.
2009: Kendrick Lamar Raps About Whitney
In his 2009 self-titled EP, Kendrick rapped about Whitney in the songs “She Needs Me” and “Determined.” He highlighted how he can’t live without her in “She Needs Me” and shared how she’s been his rock in “Determined.”
2014: Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford’s First Public Appearance as a Couple
56th Grammy Awards with Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford
Photo by Christopher Polk/Getty Images for NARAS
Whitney stepped out with Kendrick for the first time at the 56th Grammy Awards. Kendrick was nominated for seven awards, including Best Rap Album for Good Kid, M.A.A.D City.
2015: Kendrick Calls Whitney His Best Friend
Talking to Billboard in January, the Compton rapper opened up about his love for Whitney. “I wouldn’t even call her my girl,” he said. “That’s my best friend. I don’t even like the term that society has put in the world as far as being a companion — she’s somebody I can tell my fears to.”
Whitney Appears on Kendrick’s "To Pimp a Butterfly" Album
In March 2015, Kendrick dropped his highly anticipated third album, To Pimp a Butterfly, andWhitney provided backup vocals for songs “King Kunta” and “Wesley’s Theory.”
Kendrick Confirms Engagement to Whitney Alford
Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford at 2015 BET Awards
Photo by Johnny Nunez/BET/Getty Images for BET
During a The Breakfast Club interview, the Grammy award-winning artist confirmed that he and his high school sweetheart were engaged. “Yeah, definitely,” he said. “I’m loyal to the soul.”
2019: Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford Welcome Their First Child
It was reported that the couple had their first child in July 2019. While her name wasn’t revealed at the time, fans later suggested that he mentioned her name in his song “Mr. Morale,” which is off of his fifth album, Mr. Morale & the Big Steppers. He rapped, “Uzi, your father's in deep meditation.”
2022: Kendrick Lamar and Whitney Alford Welcomes Their Second Child
The couple quietly welcomed a second child, a baby boy named Enoch and they made the big reveal on the cover of the Mr. Morale & the Big Steppers album. The cover features Kendrick holding Uzi while Whitney holds Enoch. Kendrick also mentioned Enoch’s name in his song “Mr. Morale” when he rapped, “Enoch, your father's just detoxed.”
Whitney Reflects on Working With Kendrick on "Mr. Morale & the Big Steppers"
In May, the makeup artist reflected on working with Kendrick on the album, which she helped narrate, and thanked him in an Instagram post. “Sometimes the mirror is a harsh critic. Shit can get real ugly. Im proud of the work we’ve done individually and as a family. Honored to be a part of this album @kendricklamar. Thank you for your transparency. Healing can begin…,” she wrote.
Whitney Appears in Kendrick's "Count Me Out" Music Video
Whitney also appeared in her beau’s “Count Me Out” music video and shared a snippet on her Instagram page in December.
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Feature image by Lester Cohen/Getty Images for NARAS