I Found My Man's G Spot And He Almost Lost It
Porn was my first taste of what the male g spot was all about. It's like the one we have, but in men, it's located in their prostate. My interest in the male g spot came about one day when the porn I was watching got a little stale for me. I was becoming increasingly interested in the world of domination and submission and somewhere in my search results, I came across femdom.
Men would relinquish their bodies to the surrender of dominating women. They'd whip them, spank them, perform cuckhold, make them bury their faces in various places, and for some, it meant pegging. It was my first time being exposed to heterosexual men enjoying anal and being the one receiving it. Legs were up, on their backs, sometimes bent over – they were absolutely loving it, and I was intrigued by it, and oddly turned on.
I visited the intersection of that sexual interest with my at the time boyfriend, Bryson, shortly thereafter. He was my first in a lot of ways, and was definitely the first there. What surprised me was the stigma that is inherently attached to that part of the male anatomy, especially in the black community, didn't seem to apply to him personally. For some men, their penis is the ultimate pinnacle of their masculinity – suck it, blow it, ride it, mold it, make it yours.
On the flipside, for a lot of men, their sexuality feels tested when the topic of anal or their ass comes into play. I, myself, used to operate underneath that societal lens that held sexuality this black and white thing, unable to see the shades of gray in between the extremes. The fact that he owned his desires made me feel confident with owning and claiming mine. He was up for trying anything once, and we found mutual interests in the same aspects of those encounters playing out in front of us.
I really liked that for a brief moment, Kanye West identified as a man fond of that persuasion. Not because he's Kanye, but because I like when people within my community are honest about what they like. So often we're not. Black women have things they enjoy that they will never admit aloud, but so do black men.
He would later vehemently deny it, which I get, but still, the mark was made. Amber Rose put it out there that sometimes men enjoy being fingered and that women are not the only ones on the receiving end when it comes to anal play in heterosexual relationships. A week later, R&B singer Tank talked to The Breakfast Club of his love of indulging in anal play in the bedroom after a 26-year-old lover put him onto the sex act at the age of 18. He has a boundary of no fingers, but he welcomes a woman's tongue and mouth. In regards to anal play, he says:
"I was a young man with an older woman, and she put me on to things. I still remember the first time... It felt compromising at first. But then I let go. It was tickling at first...but in about 10 minutes I was like 'get in there.' I was spreading the cheeks."
The external, obvious, dick way of getting a man to come is tried and true, but the secret to increasing the intensity of your man's orgasm is all inside of the body. I had no idea how deeply that reality was until I made him do it while my fingers were inside of him. I can only imagine how it feels based on my own experiences with vaginal orgasms during anal. It's this tantalizing mixture of pain and pleasure that gives lovemaking this intense, rigorous edge. I imagine prostate stimulation for men to be either a fraction of that or a heightened version of that. To hear his crescendo of pleasure as I wrapped my lips in a swivel up and down motion on his erection, as my lubed finger went in and out, in and out, in and out, was a powerful, thrilling feeling for me.
I always feel that power when I'm able to bring a man to his knees, even while he's lying down.
When I curled my finger inside of him as a “come hither," he almost lost it completely.
In the sexual encounters I have had since then, men are not too interested in exploring that side of themselves or their sexuality. They feel a lot like I did once: that you can't be straight if you allow your woman to touch you that way, thinking nothing of the fact that what happens between a man and woman does not alter your sexual preference or orientation. I make love in a sex life now where a light spank on the butt is considered “too close for comfort." It depends on your desires as individuals and your interests sexually as a couple, and while I don't believe I'll become quite as acquainted with the male g spot as I once was before, I still have my memories. At least there's that.
If nothing else, it was my first taste in what domination feels like. And I think I like that…
Have you ever encountered the male g spot? If you ever did, what would you do?
- Hitting the P-Spot | Psychology Today ›
- Pleasure Factory ›
- Male G-spot: why are men so afraid of it? | British GQ ›
- Do men have a G-spot? You asked Google – here's the answer ... ›
- 5 Tips on Finding the Male G-Spot ... Love ›
- What is the male 'G' spot? - mirror Administrator - Mirror Online ›
- Massaging the Male G-Spot | Sex & Pancakes – The Link ›
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Why We'll Probably Never Hear Lupita Nyong'o Share Her Relationship With The World
Lupita Nyong'o is sharing a transparent look into her life after a recent breakup.
In a cover story for NET-A-PORTER, the A Quiet Place: Day One star shed light on the significant heartbreak she experienced following the end of her relationship with ex-boyfriend and TV host, Selema Masekela.
As a public figure, Nyong'o, 39, sought to divulge the news of the breakup in hopes of presenting a more authentic perspective on the pain that follows a separation.
"I was living in a lot of pain and heartbreak," she told the publication. "I looked at the environment of my social media and thought I don’t want to be a part of this illusion that everything is always coming up roses. Surely there is a lesson for me to learn in this, and I just want to be real about it."
The Black Panther star went on to explain that her choice to be transparent with her fans about her breakup came from the certainty she felt after ending the relationship. “In my mind, when I shared my relationship status with the world, it was because I felt sure about it,” she said.
While she didn’t know how the news would land with her fans, she found relief in knowing she wasn’t alone in her experience.
“I knew how it could be interpreted; I knew it would have a life of its own,” she reflects. “But then I started to see the comments and people were being so loving and supportive. The ones that moved me the most were other people sharing their pain and their heartbreak.”
Nyong'o and Masekela went Instagram official in December 2022, publicly announcing their relationship in a couple's video. In October 2023, Nyong'o took to her personal Instagram account to share the news of her breakup in her caption, writing, "At this moment, it is necessary for me to share a personal truth and publicly dissociate myself from someone I can no longer trust.”
She continued the vulnerable note, "I find myself in a season of heartbreak because of a love suddenly and devastatingly extinguished by deception. I am tempted to run into the shadows and hide, only to return to the light when I have regained my strength enough for me to say, 'Whatever, my life is better this way.' But I am reminded that the magnitude of the pain I am feeling is equal to the measure of my capacity for love."
These days, Nyong'o tells NET-A-PORTER that she is prioritizing profound self-discovery that extends beyond her career. She notes having a deliberate and unhurried approach to understanding herself.
She also alludes to keeping her relationships private moving forward after noting it was "very, very sage" of her not to talk about her private life professionally in the days before her last relationship. "I'm going back to those days by the way," Nyong'o shares of her reinstated boundaries around her personal life.
Earlier this month, Nyong'o made headlines alongside her new boyfriend actor Joshua Jackson. Nyong'o and Jackson went through public splits from their respective SOs in October 2023, with the latter splitting from his long-time partner Jodie Turner-Smith following her divorce filing from the Dawson's Creek alum.
The pair have been spotted together as early as December 2023, but nothing screamed "couple" quite as loudly as their recent getaway to Mexico for Nyong'o's 41st birthday featuring passionate displays of affection.
"Our purpose in life is to love. And so you have to get back in it," she tells the outlet, seemingly alluding to her budding new romance.
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Featured image by Taylor Hill/Getty Images