This Woman Went From Welfare to Creating A Lash Empire
Marlene Aymone certainly knows a thing or two about the sacrifice that comes with being your own boss.
She passed up opportunities for a steady income to start her luxury eyelash line, Lena Lashes and almost lost her marriage in the process. She was even on the brink of losing her son due to the late nights and early mornings required to keep her company running.
But with sacrifice comes great reward, and thanks to social media, the wife and mother of two, who at one time only had $26 to her name, has built an incredibly successful business within just a couple of years.
“I was expecting to sell a few thousand a month, not a huge volume every single month," Marlene says of her seemingly overnight success.
Beauty blogger Raye Boyce rocking a pair of Lena Lashes
There's something about a good pair of lashes that takes even the most beautifully beat face to the next level. Slick on a pair of the peep enhancers and suddenly you can't help but to smize in front of the camera, fluttering your faux lovelies as if they were your own. Marlene refers to them as an addiction, and with social sites like YouTube and Instagram catering to beauty enthusiasts, there has been an increasing demand for her product from both casual consumers to celebrities and influencers.
Like most fairytales, though, Marlene's journey to profitability wasn't picture perfect. Just two years ago, the entrepreneur was going to grad school on a full fellowship and teaching science to kids in underperforming schools. The money was decent, but her passion was in the beauty industry, so when her head wasn't buried in textbooks, she was selling hair bundles and doing makeup tutorials on YouTube.
“I was like, okay, I want to try something else because there were so many people selling hair and it's expensive to promote and sell. I needed to find something that was a little easier to promote."
Marlene took her love for makeup and developed it into a side hustle and, in the process, came up with the idea for starting her own eyelash line.
Taking $750 from her savings, she began researching suppliers in Asia and bought $250 worth of inventory and put the rest of the cash towards creating her website. But the pressure of being an entrepreneur hit hard before she could even make her first sale. Juggling her marriage, a two-year-old, and a hectic work and school schedule had her questioning whether or not she was making the right decision, and she feared that her company wasn't going to give her a return on her investment.
Her husband was even less supportive of her vision and told her that she was wasting her time thinking that she could build a successful business using social media as a primary promotional platform. “He would say things like, 'This is beneath you; you're so smart and you're so intelligent, but now you're doing Youtube videos. Like what is this? You don't care about the family.' He started having these feelings of resentment and being bitter on the inside."
Sinking into a revolving state of depression, Marlene convinced herself that there was something wrong with the product and shelved her products for a year until her mother encouraged her to sell the inventory that she had. In February of 2014, she began shipping out her product. Business was steady and things seemed to be looking up, but two months in, she opened an email from her husband who had relocated to Georgia for work just a few months prior. He was filing for divorce.
“He had talked about divorce a few times, but I thought he was just trying to scare me. My husband's African-American and I'm from West Africa. So he knows that African people, we take marriage very seriously. I was like, he's just doing that to scare me because he knows I'm African, alright cool."
Photo Credit: Lena Lashes
The joke became real when she saw his attorney's name at the bottom of the divorce papers. At the time, her son was staying with her husband while she continued going to school and running her business. The pending divorce meant that she could possibly lose custody of her child, so she packed her bags and the little inventory that she had and moved to Columbus, Georgia, determined to fight for the courts for sole custody. “I didn't have any money; it wasn't something I was preparing myself for. You don't really think that, oh yeah I'm going to be divorced tomorrow so let me start saving some money."
"You don't really think that oh yeah I'm going to be divorced tomorrow so let me start saving some money."
She rented an apartment and brought her son to live with her, but with no money to her name and mounting attorney fees, she had to apply for welfare, and sank deeper into depression. Though she had hit rock-bottom—sleeping on an air mattress in an unfurnished apartment with only $300 to feed her and her child—she decided that fighting for her dream was better than being broke. She shipped out her remaining inventory to influencers in the makeup industry who were following her on Instagram in exchange for promoting her products, leaving her down to just $26 in her bank account.
“Luckily it paid off, and from there, we started having bigger YouTubers wear and promote the lashes, and it started to grow from there," says Marlene. She compares her journey to Radio One founder Cathy Hughes, who went from sleeping on the floor of her radio station to creating a media empire. “She had no money, all she had was her vision."
Beauty vlogger Jackie Aina rocking Lena Lashes and Liquid Lipsticks
By December, Marlene was off of food stamps and the money was rolling in thanks to social influencers helping push her products on YouTube. Her husband had even called off the divorce. But Marlene ran into another issue—she didn't have the supply to meet the demand, and though she had proof that she was running a profitable business (she was making so much money that she was being audited by PayPal and Square every month), she struggled to get the capital needed to purchase enough products in advance.
It's something that still greatly bothers the now 31-year-old as she looks to expand her business into storefront locations outside of her current location in New Orleans. Being a minority in the beauty industry means often being overlooked for opportunities for funding, and having to work harder than her Caucasian counterparts to prove the profitability of her idea. “If you're Black and you ask for a loan, they'll ask you for your granddaddy's freedom papers. When you're black, everything has to be perfect."
"If you are black and ask for a loan, they'll ask you for your granddaddy's freedom papers."
There's also the issue of black-owned businesses being stereotyped as not having the same level of customer service as another company, causing many not to support their own. “You pay people to do customer service, and when you pay people you have to put them on your payroll, you have to pay Medicare and social security taxes and worker compensation," says Marlene. “Those costs add up. I can't afford to have 24/7 customer service support."
There's no denying that being an entrepreneur, especially a black one, is hard. Damn hard. But Marlene, who refers herself as the Walt Disney of lashes due to her pretty packaging and creative collections, is determined not to give up on the one thing that has kept her going when she hardly had a dollar to her name. “I look at my lashes like my babies, because when I didn't have anything, my lashes got me through bad situations, so it's always a pleasure for me to come up with collections and release new lashes."
“I look at my lashes like my babies, because when I didn't have anything my lashes got me through bad situations."
Beauty blogger Jae wearing the "Dante" liquid lipstick.
Though she's getting better, there are still moments when she battles with depression due to the demands of the business. “The whole thing about depression is that it allows fear to grow, so your fears keep growing and growing to a point where you feel like you are completely defeated. Depression also causes you to self-sabotage. Every time we have an opportunity, depression will tell you don't go because it's not going to work out. Or don't go because you're not smart enough; don't do it because you wont succeed. It always causes you to commit self-sabotage."
She credits prayer and making a point of getting out amongst people to helping her to stay strong in moments where her anxiety attempts to get the best of her. “Don't isolate yourself. Depression will tell you to stay in the house, stay by yourself. Sometimes people who are depressed, they have a saying of, 'I like to stay by myself, I like to stay home.' No, it's depression. It's not normal for women to want to live isolated, so talk to people."
Balancing being a mom and a boss is no easy feat either. When she was pregnant with her second child, she missed prenatal appointments after her first trimester, and after he was born, she would breastfeed him in the office while taking orders. Her marriage has also taken a few hits on days when she's too tired to be intimate. “Men are just like us. Sometimes we don't realize it because they have muscles and they're big, so we're like well he's strong anyway; he'll be alright. And it's like, not really because they're also emotional creatures too, and they take rejection the way we take rejection."
Marlene has been in the business long enough to see even the most picture-perfect relationships fall to pieces when the roles reverse and the woman becomes the primary breadwinner. She, too, is making more money than her husband, who works as an engineer at an oil company, but makes a point to remind him of his value. “I would tell women even if you start marking more money, still be a wife, still be kind, we know you make the money, you don't need to rub it in his face. It does something to you as a woman to know that you have a strong man by your side because when you go home, life is kind of tough. When you have bad days, he can't even uplift you because you crush his self-esteem."
"It does something to you as a woman to know that you have to a strong man by your side."
Helping other women become more confident and her desire to put her sons in a position to where they won't have the same struggle of following their dreams also gives her just the bit of juice she needs to keep going.
“I just hope that they'll be able to have a really good life, and if they are able to start something one day, I'll be able to give them the money so they can start their own businesses, and be who they want to be," she says. She apologizes as the tears start streaming, “I don't want my kids to go to college and have to worry about financial aid and being in debt. I want my kids, when they become adults, to have a big advantage over other people by not having debt."
She might not be donning the cape of a traditional super hero, but there's no denying that Marlene is a super woman both on and off the job.
Kiah McBride writes technical content by day and uses storytelling to pen real and raw personal development pieces on her blog Write On Kiah. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter at @writeonkiah.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Honestly, I don’t know if it will surprise y’all or not to know that a few years back, Vice published an article entitled, “Women Get Bored in Bed Faster Than Men.” When it comes to the clients I work with, what I will say is men tend to underestimate how creative women can be while women seem to overlook that men fake orgasms just about as much as they do. My grand takeaway from all of this? Folks need to be intentional when it comes to keeping the spice alive in their sex life; especially if they’re in a long-term relationship.
That’s why, when one couple came to me and asked what was something that they could do to light the fire (pun intended) in their own bedroom, the first thing that I asked was if they had ever tried wax play before. You should’ve seen the expression on their faces. LOL.
When it comes to things like that, I think that it’s still taboo for some, simply because they’ve only seen it on a movie screen or heard about it in true extreme sexual contexts — and so, they don’t think that it’s something that is “for them” when, the reality is, with the right tips in tow, wax play can be for pretty much anyone…and everyone.
So today, let’s add something new to some of y’all’s boudoir list of activities. Here are 10 things that will, hopefully, help you to see the flames of wax play (I’ve got puns all over the place today) in a whole new light.
1. Anticipation Does Wonders for Sexual Arousal
GiphyI once read an article by a mental health expert who said that anticipation is probably the greatest aphrodisiac of all. It builds excitement. It fuels curiosity. At the end of the day, it’s like a mental form of edging because you’re getting close to something that you look forward to — although you’re not quite there yet. Listen, he’s not off base because even science says that anticipation can give you a dopamine hit that can ultimately improve your sexual experiences.
Keeping this point in mind, how can watching hot wax drip from a candle and head toward your body not fuel some level of anticipation? Especially if it’s your first few times trying it? A woman by the name of Ana Monnar once said, “Anticipation is sometimes more exciting than actual events.” Just something to consider, when it comes to entertaining bringing wax play into your world, my dear.
2. Wax Play Is Peak-Level Foreplay
GiphyWe all know what foreplay is, right? Just to be sure that we’re all on the same page, a very basic definition is it’s something that typically happens right before sex in order to arouse the people who are about to have it. And since foreplay is pretty much the prelude to copulation, it’s important that “the appetizer” is damn near as good as the “main course.” Wax play can help to ensure that because, aside from what I just said about anticipation, it can also help you and your partner tap into your more sensual and seductive sides. It’s hot. It requires being mindful. And since so much give and take is involved, it requires both people to be very into the moment. Lawd. Wax play is sexy to even just think about!
3. Temperature Pleasure Is Lots of Fun
GiphyOkay, say that you’ve never played with wax (in this way) before. Have you ever incorporated ice cubes? I ain’t gonna let y’all get ALL up in my business, so…let me just say (for now) that some ice during oral sex ain’t neva hurt nobody…quite the contrary! There’s something about the unexpected cool that mixes around with the warmth of a mouth that is truly unmatched. Along these same lines, wax play brings in the heat and, what makes temperature pleasure/play so awesome is, that it uses the sensations of different temperatures to bring out different forms of stimulation.
Another thing that’s worth noting about temperature pleasure is if you’re someone who considers yourself to be on the sexually conservative side yet you do like this type of activity, whether you realize it or not, you’re low-key participating in a form of kink (yep!). This brings me to my next point.
4. Wax Play Is an Introduction to Kink
GiphyIt’s kind of interesting how some people clam up at the thought of a (sexual) kink when the reality is, at the end of the day, it’s about having a certain type of sexual experience (as opposed to a fetish that focuses on objects or body parts; like a foot fetish, for example). So, if it’s that simple, why does it intimidate a lot of folks? Well, kinks tend to delve into people’s fantasies or unconventional ways of thinking (like BDSM or voyeurism).
At the same time, the cool thing about kinks is you control how deep you want to go. Just know that if you do participate in wax play, there’s no point in turning up your nose to the whole kink thing; wax play technically qualifies.
5. Soy Does One Thing. Paraffin Does Another.
GiphyOkay, so let’s spend a couple of moments talking about the things that you need to get the most out of your wax play experience. First, please don’t be out here imitating movies. While they will have you believing that you should pull a taper candle from your dining room table and go ham with it, it’s best to go with massage candles; they are specifically designed for wax play and body massages (The Knot has a recommendation list here and Women’s Health has a list of their own here).
When it comes to candles, in general, I’m always a fan of soy because they burn cleaner and last longer. However, when it comes to wax play, two other reasons why soy is best is it’s natural and “burns lower;” this simply means that once the wax hits your body, it won’t be as hot as, say, paraffin wax will (because it has a higher burning point).
What all of this means is if you want a more comfortable experience, go with a soy (or even a shea butter or beeswax) candle. If you want to play with the big (wax play) kids, try paraffin.
Oh, and if you’re wondering if you can never use “regular” candles — I mean, it’s your body. All I’m saying is some candles are designed for wax play; birthday candles? They are not. Feel me?
6. Massage Candles Feel Incredible on Your Muscles and Joints
GiphySo, here’s the thing about massage candles: If you’ve ever had a professional massage before, your massage therapist may have used them. And if you’ve gotten a high-end mani/pedi, some paraffin wax may have come into play (no pun intended). That’s because the wax from both types of candles has health benefits that include relaxing muscles, improving joint mobility, and increasing blood flow throughout the body. And when you factor in the fact that the better you physically feel before sex, the better sex will be during it — isn’t that just one more plus for and perk of wax play? I definitely think so.
7. The Aromatherapy Is Incomparable
GiphySomething else that’s awesome about most massage candles is they have a wonderfully alluring scent to them, by design. Yes, that matters too because there is plenty of data out here to support the fact that aromatherapy does everything from reduce stress and relieve bodily discomfort to treat headaches and fight off infections (word on the street is that it may even help with menstrual cramps and menopause).
As far as your sex life goes, aromatherapy is supreme because certain essential oils double up as aphrodisiacs. Lavender, neroli, and rose are proven to improve your sexual function. Geranium reduces anxiety. And listen, if climaxing is your ultimate goal, check out “Ultimate Climax Hack? 10 Scents That Make It So Much Easier To Orgasm” and then look for massage oils that smell like, say, vanilla, saffron or jasmine. Bottom line, a good massage candle that smells amazing is going to be worth every cent that you spent to purchase it.
8. You Will Learn Communication (and Dirty Talk) on a Whole ‘Nother Level
GiphyOne of the reasons why I once penned, “Are You Ready To Apply Your Love Language To Your Sex Life?” for the platform is because, if there’s one thing that I think is so awesome about sex, is it finds a way to incorporate all five of your senses (sight, touch, taste, sound and hearing) as well as your top love languages (words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, physical touch and gifts — if you’re open to it).
And when it comes to hearing (and words of affirmation), this is another area where wax play can be a winner because, as you’re learning what works for your partner and they learn what works for you, words have to be exchanged… perhaps even dirty ones.
And why is dirty talk so damn effective? According to scientific research, it has the ability to activate your entire brain (the biggest sex organ that you have) and when this is going on while you’re being physically stimulated — chile, the sky truly is the limit!
9. Wax Play Is Completely Customizable
GiphyYou know back when I was talking about soy candles vs. paraffin ones? Something that I didn’t mention, by design at the time, is that, although I will forever be Team Massage Candles when it comes to this particular topic, there are some known as wax play candles too. What’s the difference? Wax play candles tend to remain pretty hard (after being lit up) while massage candles are designed to melt into a liquid that you can massage on your partner’s body.
Why am I bringing this all up now? Well, it’s to serve as a reminder that wax play can be “dialed up” or “turned down” based on what you want to do. If you just want to put a twist on a massage, you can do that. If you’d like to test your partner’s tolerance level by applying more heat for longer, do that.
Just make sure that you use the kind of wax that doesn’t fully melt on shaved areas of the body (pretty sure why is self-explanatory), that you moisturize your skin beforehand (it’s easier to remove the wax…or whatever is leftover) that way and that you pour around 15-20 inches away from your partner’s body; that gives it time to cool somewhat on the way down. Oh, and if you don’t want to jack up your sheets, you might want to lay down a protective drop cloth (like this one here).
10. It Sure As Hell Ain’t Boring
Season 1 Friends GIF - Find & Share on GIPHYGiphyLast point — and it brings all of this full circle. Now that you’ve read all of the ways that wax play can benefit your sex life, how in the world could you associate it with “boring” on any level? Anything that can get you hype, cultivate eagerness, and enhance what you’ve already got going on…that is worth putting on your sex bucket list and trying at least one time, wouldn’t you say? And why can’t that time be…TONIGHT? Shoot your man a pick of a massage candle with a heart and watch him beat you home.
Then report back (with edits…LOL).
Something tells me that you’ll become a wax play fan — SOON.
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