Why I Don't Care If There Are Same Sex Couples In My Kids Cartoons
It's been a year since Nickelodeon debuted an interracial, gay couple on their cartoon, “The Loud House” and now parents everywhere are once again pissed, but this time it's with the Disney Channel.
In an episode of “Star vs. The Forces of Evil” the main characters attended a concert where the song "Just Friends" caused a ripple effect of kisses from concert attendees ― a few of them were same-sex couples, making it the network's first same-sex kiss in an animated cartoon.
The Internet had a lot to say about it:
While some people didn't see a problem with it, not everyone is happy. Activist group One Million Moms released this statement on their website.
This is the last place parents would expect their children to be confronted with content regarding sexual orientation. Issues of this nature are being introduced too early and too soon, and it is becoming extremely common and unnecessary. Disney has decided to be politically correct versus providing family-friendly entertainment. Disney should stick to entertaining instead of pushing an agenda. Conservative families need to urge Disney to avoid mature and controversial topics.
What's funny about all of this is that the clip from the show isn't detailed, in fact it's a few seconds long; much like the Nickelodeon "Loud House" episode. In their July 20th episode “Overnight Success”, the show’s main character, Lincoln Loud, invites his friend Clyde McBride over for a sleepover. When Clyde arrives, he is escorted by his two dads, Harold (voiced by Wayne Brady) and Howard McBride (voiced by Michael McDonald). In the clip (which you can watch below), Harold and Howard are dropping Clyde off at Lincoln’s house for the evening and in true overprotective parent fashion, bring along everything their son might need from his inhaler to a picture of their progressive family. The clip in fact doesn’t even focus on anyone’s sexuality, it focuses on a family that just happens to include two caring and considerate fathers who are in a relationship.
Unfortunately, a few parents on my Facebook page didn’t see that. What they felt they witnessed was LGBT lifestyles being forced into their households and Nickelodeon robbing them of the opportunity to initiate the “sex talk” with their pre-schoolers and basically stripping them of their fragile childhoods.
A few highlights from the conversation include:
“Its simple i wanna see a regular cartoon that just shows a strong black family thats funny, it aint to many but im curious to kno why my son is suppose to be watchin a show that show two uncles together.”
“Absolutely forcing a vision that’s not ideal.”
“A gay kids show?? 😩 wtf and why? What show is this?”
“Yeah I admit it. I don't have a problem with LGBT but I personally feel they pushing that shit too hard on kids. That's why kids is like 5 and don't know what they supposed to be.”
Like I’ve said many times before, I don’t expect everybody to stand on their porch and raise a rainbow flag. But when it comes to raising our children to understand exactly why representation matters and to be tolerant of others’ lifestyles, I just can’t see how we can preach, “#BlackLivesMatter (but please keep the gay couples off the cartoons)”. I’ve written before how representation has come a long way since I was a young girl and how happy I am to see my daughter growing up in a world of #BlackGirlMagic. But I can’t fight for there to be Michelle Obamas, Zendayas, and Taraji P. Hensons while secretly believing diversity only applies when it comes to the black race being represented and respected.
I can't say I agree with every lifestyle, and I don't pretend to understand all of them, but I think it's still important to teach children to be tolerant. Just like some people can't understand the struggle of the black man, others don't know what it's like to be gay, queer, transgender or otherwise. I think that's what tolerance is all about: Recognizing that just because you don't understand a struggle, that doesn't mean it's not real.
[Tweet "Just because you don't understand a struggle, doesn't mean it's not real."]
In addition, a cycle that I would like to break with my own daughter is the hypersexualization of our society. In a 50 second clip (that many of the parents that were commenting didn’t even watch) no one could seem to get past the sexuality of the two dads to recognize the cartoon wasn’t even about their relationship. It was about a boy getting dropped off by his overbearing parents to a sleepover. I’ve seen parents holding the hands of children that can recite the whole second verse of Drake’s “Controlla” or could draw a Venn diagram of all of the Kardashian sisters’ sex partners, but suddenly gay couples start to make an appearance on cartoons and everyone’s on a tangent about TV robbing children of their innocence?
As uncomfortable as these conversations may make us adults because of our own transgressions, sexuality is something that is a part of all our identities from birth. Instead of shaming sexuality completely, I believe in taking cartoons like these, or other shows that hint at sexuality, and starting much needed, healthy, age-appropriate conversations about what sexuality means to them and the part it plays in their life. As a sex educator, I always say “the sex talk” is about more than “Wear a condom and don’t get pregnant.” It’s about providing our children with healthy examples of romantic relationships.
I can respect that every household has the right to shape the world for their children as they see fit and raise them with the values that are important to them. But sexuality and alternative lifestyles are here to stay. You can only shield your children from them for so long before they have to learn how to treat others with respect and not discredit everything they don’t understand or that doesn’t apply to them.
If you don’t start these conversations it will only be a matter of time before the world does it for you.
But even if you choose to save the “sex talk” until they’re 25, the “tolerance” talk needs to start now, about ALL of the issues in the world, not only the ones that affect us.
What do you think about same-sex couples being added to cartoons?
Writer, sexual health superhero, and #BlackGirlMagic and #BlackBoy curator regularly featured on @Madamenoire. Toya can usually be found in between her earbuds, listening to trap music and refreshing her browser for concert tickets. Tweet her @thetruetsharee.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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ItGirl In Motion: DonYé Taylor Asked Herself This Question When Creating Her Brainchild
"Being an 'ItGirl' is all about being yourself and taking all of the elements that make you who you are and displaying them at your highest capability," creative brainiac DonYé Taylor says in the introduction of the limited video series, "ItGirl In Motion."
In partnership with Hyundai, xoNecole has unveiled the limited series in conjunction with our inaugural ItGirl 100 list. The list boasts 100 Black women who not only innovate and take up space when it comes to putting on for their cities, but also as the driving force behind brands that create impact for the culture. ItGirl DonYé Taylor is one of the 100 featured ladies who put her purpose into action.
ITGIRL IN MOTION with DONYE TAYLORwww.youtube.com
As a marketing consultant, content creator, and CEO, a driving force behind DonYé's ambitions has been to show others how she sees the world by "creating art and doing things that shift perspective." In founding her brainchild, Nüclei, which is coincidentally also home to the ever-so-chic chrome brain piggybank, DonYé briefly touched on the inspiration behind the brand. "I was like, 'What would it look like if I were to be of service to myself?' And that's what made me create Nuclei," she said.
Watch the video above to take a peek into the life of the LA-based ItGirl, the importance of Black women receiving our "flowers" while we're here, and the three things she believes are absolutely essential to any ItGirl.
See our ItGirl 100 list in full here. Click through the gallery below for some BTS moments of DonYé and our partnership with Hyundai.
CREDITS
Director: Mikkoh @mikkoh
Production Company: @30inthemorning
AD/Gimbal Op: @jeffreyrattanong
DP: @jucelandrin_
Editor: @30inthemorning
1st AC: Bonnie Delgado @bonniebellevue
2nd AC: Liz Robles @lizfatimarobles
FPV Drone Op: Kai Kevin Goh @kaivertigoh
Gaffer: Nelson Nguyen @nelson_ftw
Key Grip: Ames Hoang @mangothemaker
SLT: Jamon Tolbert @jamon.tolbert
Sound Mixer: Deyo Forteza @introducingdeyo
PA: Breyona Holt @exquisite_eye
PA: Aminah Muhammad @aminahmuhamm
BTS: Marika Belamarich @marikarosegold
Featured image by Marika Belamarich for xoNecole