Search the popular hashtag #RelationshipGoals on social media and there will be an influx of picture-perfect couples engaged in a photo opt on a red carpet or on vacation. We see these images, hit the like button, and hope to one day be that couple.
While we crave the lifestyle publicized in front of us via social media, most notably Instagram, we often ignore that couple's story and what it took for them to be where they are today. One of the couples that fall into the #RelationshipGoals category is The Breakfast Club's Raashaun "DJ Envy" Casey and his wife Gia Casey. You can't look on their Instagram pages without falling in love with photos of their big adorable family in matching outfits with clear blue waters as their backdrop, or dressed up in elegant gowns and tuxedos as they wish everyone a Happy New Year.
But the Caseys are more than just a filtered photo. The couple met as teenagers in Queens, NY and have been together for 23 years, married for 16. It's not hard to imagine all of the things DJ Envy and Gia had to overcome as a couple throughout their years together. With their shared podcast The Casey Crew, the couple have managed to bring dimension to the label Relationship Goals and bring realness and transparency to their unfiltered side.
Launched only a year ago, The Casey Crew podcast has touched on a variety of topics, such as love, money, kids, and infidelity, hoping to be a true testament for listeners who are facing hardships in their relationships and don't know how to come out of it on the other side. In fact, their first live show was titled "The Cheating Episode" and they talked about DJ Envy's infidelity, not holding back a single detail.
As they continue to candidly share their unconditional love for one another and their family with the world through their podcast and social media, I think it's safe to say that we are undoubtedly witnessing the genesis of a power couple.
On why it was important for them to be explicit about their marriage on their podcast:
DJ Envy: "The funny thing is, we're not acting and so, sometimes when you're listening to the podcast, you will hear us discuss things such as my insecurities or how we dealt with this and that and it's really opening up to people like, 'Wow we do this, it's normal.' Because when you look on social media, everybody's lives are so picture perfect, but it's not perfect."
Gia: "In order to do a podcast and to be successful, you have to put yourself in a position where other people can relate to you, so it was never an interest to me, when we discussed doing the podcast, to be fraudulent [and] to put out a face that didn't represent us."
On habits that they believe ensure a happy, successful marriage:
The Real
DJ Envy: "We're both into each other's things. I'm a car guy. Ever since I was a little child, I collected cars and Gia's into that. She can tell a difference between a Ferrari, McLaren, Mercedes, or an Aston Martin - not necessarily because she's into it, but because her husband's into it and same for me. I probably know more about shoes and Birkin bags, Kelly bags, Constance bags, Chanel Boy bags, Louis Vuitton and jewelry than most women out there, but I am because my wife is into it. Not only that, but most people don't know that maybe 98% of the stuff my wife has, I bought and that's just because I like shopping for her. I like going to the mall and saying, 'I think my wife will like this.' And 95% of the time, I'm right. I don't like watching The Bachelor, well maybe I do a little bit, but I'll sit and watch it with her."
Gia: "Suffering the whole time, but it's the effort." (Laughs)
DJ Envy: "And it's the same thing with football, you know. She's in there watching it with me and yeah, she asks a lot of questions, 'What position is that?'"
Gia: "Oh, so I annoy you now?"
DJ Envy: "I didn't say you annoy me, you just ask a lot of questions. But she does that because she knows I'm into it."
On how they keep things spicy:
DJ Envy: "We just try to recreate different things that are outside of the box. We do role play. I've been Barack Obama, I've been a cowboy."
Gia: "He's been Maxwell, most memorably."
DJ Envy: "That was in college by the way, when I was Maxwell. But we try to do things where we spice things up. Our goal is to satisfy each other and have fun in our relationship. We don't take anything too serious. We have date night every week where we leave the kids at home and do different things, whether it's a movie, dinner, or we stay in a hotel in the city, or we go gambling."
Gia: "We go to the spa."
DJ Envy: "It's something that we do once a week so we can have that time so that we can say this is our time or we might just stay at home and watch El Chapo or Narcos."
Gia: "Our biggest goal is to have fun with each other. You can't really ask how do you keep things spicy without asking how do you stay connected because you stay connected and you actually like the person you're married to and enjoy each other's company, then the sexy kinda follows suit."
On how they cater to each other's wants and desires:
Gia: "We both take really good care of ourselves for one another. To me, Raashaun always looks sexy. I feel like when he gets dressed, he's getting dressed for me. I don't get dressed for women, I don't get dressed for other men. I get dressed for my husband. If I'm choosing a shade of lipstick, I'm thinking about what he might like, what appeals to him. When I'm deciding to do my hair, I'm thinking, 'Well, he likes it parted down the middle and straight, that's what I'm going to do.' Like we are very into pleasing each other in all facets, including the bedroom, and we try different things."
"He makes me feel like he's looking at gold."
"If you can imagine being with someone for 23 years, all the sex we've had. (Laughs). Obviously. But how many things can you do begs that question right? Like the other day, Raashaun came home with four books on Tantra and he was like 'look this is something I think we need to get into' and I'm like 'bet. Let's start a little you and me book club.' That interests me and it impresses me that he's still into it and enthusiastic about it and that turns me on because you know as a woman, the more a man is into you, the more you are into them and the better you perform. The more a man makes you feel secure, the better you perform. You don't feel as inhibited because he's looking at [you] like he's looking at gold. He might be looking at copper for real (laughs), but I don't know that because he makes me feel like he's looking at gold."
On maintaining a relationship with their kids despite their busy schedules:
DJ Envy: "First off, we are open and honest with our kids about everything."
Gia: "We might be too honest."
DJ Envy: "From finances [to] whatever. In our house, our kids know what's going on. If I'm paying a bill, I tell my kids what the bill is and how much it is so that they get a sense of what money is and the value of money and how hard we work to bring that money in."
Gia: "Right, because if you have kids like ours, if you don't take those teaching moments and show them the difference between $200 and $2000, all they know is, if they ask for something and they're well behaved, they get it. So, it's important that they understand what $200 can buy you, what $2000 can buy you. They can have a point of reference so that when they are growing into young adults, they have a good perspective on money and value. But like I was saying earlier ,when my kids first come home, they drop their book bags at the front door, they walk up the stairs, and come straight into my room where I usually am. They take off their shoes and hop in the bed and they spend about a half hour each catching me up on their day. We're very close."
On what's next for the Caseys:
The Real
DJ Envy: "We love the podcast and we're gonna continue to do the podcast and really just push the brand. We really enjoy helping people and talking to people about our relationship in hopes that it can help them in their relationship. We'll do more podcasts, live events and take it on the road where we'll see people in different markets. You never know you may see us on TV one day, cross our fingers."
Follow The Casey Crew on Soundcloud or iTunes. And keep up with the Caseys on social @djenvy and @gia_casey.
RELATED
Those myths that you keep telling yourself, and believe to be true may be what's holding you back, boo. Most of the time you're thinking these things on a subconscious level and may not even realize the damage that's being done. But once you gain clarity and call out your limiting beliefs for what they are, you'll finally be able to break free and reach new levels financially.
Let's dig into a few myths that have a direct impact on your money and are keeping you BROKE.
1. “Money is the root of all evil.”
Nah, this right here is a straight-up LIE! The truth is this: the LOVE OF MONEY is the root of all evil. When you think that money is the root of all evil, you're limiting yourself from keeping money, as well as receiving more of it. Without even knowing it, you might be scared of going after opportunities that will get you to the money.
Think about it. How can money be evil? Money is simply a resource that we control. Instead of believing and saying that money is the root of all evil, replace it with this supporting belief instead:
"Money is a resource and a means to do good and live well."
2. "I'm broke."
Broke is a mindset, boo. Your financial situation is shaped by how you think about money, which influences how you manage your money. Guess what? If you keep crying that you're broke, you're going to remain that way. All you are doing is reinforcing that limiting belief into the universe and your actions aren't gonna line up with what you need to do in order to get ahead.
It's imperative that you get a grip on this way of thinking and behaving, or else you'll never be able to break the cycle. I challenge you to think more in terms of abundance and believing that you can be wealthy. Are you up for the challenge?
3. "I can afford it."
You say that you can afford that pair of shoes and then turn around and realize that you don't even have enough money for gas the morning after. You can't just look at your checking account balance in the moment and think that everything is all good. Trust me, I've been there. This is where having a clear-cut, written budget comes in handy.
A budget is really just a spending/savings plan. It's a strategic system that lets you know how much money is coming in and going out every month. In reality, a budget can:
- Help you understand your financial situation and whether you can really afford something or not.
- Help you save for the things you want and do more of what you enjoy.
- Help you avoid getting caught short by bills you can't pay.
- Help you escape the paycheck-to-paycheck life.
4. "I deserve to treat myself."
GiphyHow many "treats" do you need, sis? If you really sit down and keep it 100 with yourself, do you really deserve those so-called treats? Are you taking care of your responsibilities like you should be? Instead of buying things that you don't need (with money you don't have) and labeling them as a "treat," you should be treating yourself by investing in your future and saving some coins.
If you spend all of the money that you earn instead of saving and investing it, you will never create the financial abundance that you do desire to have.
Here's a tip: Try putting both your short-term and long-term savings on auto-pilot so you don't even notice the money that you could be missing. When you don't have to look at it, you aren't tempted by any "excess" that you might have.
5. "I need to make more money and then I'll be better with my finances."
If you can't manage the little that you have now, what makes you think that you're gonna be able to manage more money? The more money you make, the more you're gonna spend if you don't get those habits in check early on. You're going to go right back to complaining about your finances and crying that you're still broke and in need of even more money. You'll never be satisfied. There will never be enough money. Remember, there are former millionaires who are struggling out here in these streets because they wanted to live a "fake fancy" lifestyle and ball out of control.
Start by being content with the income that you currently have and handling it with better care. Learn the ins and outs of sound financial management now, so that when you're finally blessed with more, you'll be able to manage it with ease.
I challenge you to start thinking better, which will ultimately lead to you doing better. It's time to prioritize your finances in a way that you haven't done before if you want to level up this year. It's time to activate your discipline. It's time to finally do something different.
Make the commitment to yourself and decide that absolutely nothing's gonna stand in your way of breaking that broke mentality.
What’s better than being in love? Building an empire while doing it. Watch Making Cents to see how real couples turn their money dreams into money moves.
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Originally published on January 5, 2018