How Robin Thede Is Making Her Mark As The Only Black Woman Hosting Late Night TV
When Robin Thede walks on set of her late-night talk show The Rundown with Robin Thede, there's no shortage of brown faces. The wardrobe assistant that helps keep her dressed to the nines, the digital assistant snapping behind-the-scenes footage for social media, and the stage manager and producers who help bring her show to life are all equally talented at their respective crafts, and are being given the opportunity to shine in an industry where they're often the minority.
“I have producers, writers, sound people—black women in every sort of position, and so whatever happens with this show they can go on to other things because that's all it takes," she tells me on our Monday morning phone call. “It's getting their foot in the door, so I'm really proud of that. I employ a ton of black women on my show and I'm happy everyday to come in to see their faces."
Somewhere on the path to purpose, a legacy begins to be birthed. It's the thing that you leave behind that ensures that the generations after you who are reaching up can one day reach back—creating an unbreakable chain of opportunity that pulls often overlooked ethnic and gender groups out of obscurity.
Thede's own climb began at the beckoning presence of comedic icons, such as Whoopi Goldberg, Eddie Murphy, and Richard Pryor.
“When I saw Whoopi's one-woman show, I remember seeing it on TV and being so captivated," she says. “I'd never seen a brown woman on television before being funny, and she had such an affect on me."
“I'd never seen a brown woman on television before being funny, and she had such an affect on me."
It was enough to encourage the daughter of “good Midwestern folks" to dream beyond the trailer parks of Iowa. While Thede didn't grow up well endowed, she was rich in love, support, and confidence.
While getting her formal education, she simultaneously became an intense student of her craft, developing a voracious appetite for all things comedy—from sketch and improv to standup. Before the days of Black comedians like Ellen Cleghorne, Thede tuned to the likes of Chevy Chase, Gene Wilder, and Carol Burnett.
Photo Credit: Jaxonphotogroup.com
“The black comedians came as I got older and they got more exposure and I got to see them more, but in the early, early days it was definitely Whoopi, first and foremost, and then all of these other comedians that I was able to watch on network television—the cleaner comics."
In the late night hours during sleepovers with friends, she was introduced to more unfiltered comics, such as Richard Pryor and Eddie Murphy. “Once I discovered Eddie Murphy and Richard Pryor it was like, oh my God, I can be like this," she says. “All of these amazing, varied comics, you have to be able to appreciate their style and their genius for what it is."
Thede majored in Broadcast Journalism and African-American Studies, but her fire for comedy never extinguished. At Northwestern University, she ran a sketch comedy group and then later trained at The Second City in Chicago before following in the footsteps of her comedic predecessor and bringing her own one-woman show to Los Angeles.
During that time, she caught the attention of Mike Epps' manager, which led to her writing for the comedian both on the road and on the sketch comedy show Funny Bidness. Thede began landing one opportunity after another, and soon became a regular writer for award shows (BET Awards, BET Hip Hop Awards and NAACP Image Awards), penning jokes for a number of comedians, including Anthony Anderson, Kevin Hart, and Jamie Foxx.
Simultaneously, Thede pursued a career in acting, appearing on shows such as All of Us, BET's web series Buppies, and later Key & Peele, and working as an entertainment correspondent for E! News. She also wrote and acted in videos for Funny or Die (one of her most popular videos was a remake of Bobby Brown's “Every Little Step" with Wayne Brady and Mike Tyson) and wrote on a number of TV shows including In the Flow with Affion Crockett and Real Husband of Hollywood with Kevin Hart.
But ironically, despite her long trajectory as a writer, Thede never sought out to become the woman behind many of the jokes from our favorite comedians.
“I was always a performer, I never called myself a writer," says Thede. “I was acting for many years before I ever admitted that I was a writer. Even when I was doing writing jobs I just thought, oh, I'm doing that to pay the bills. What happened was, I would always perform in sketch shows, pilots, and sitcoms, and then they would either ask me to write or I'd get hired to write and asked to perform. So people are like why did you choose one or the other? And that's not how it went. I came out to LA to be a comedian and was acting but was always a good writer because I learned growing up and at The Second City, I really honed my writing; I never set out to be a writer. But then, one day I woke up and I'm like oh, I'm in the Writer's Guild and also in SAG, I guess I'm also a writer. Once I embraced both wholly, my career opened up."
For a number of years, Thede split her time both in front and behind the camera as she climbed the ladder of success. Her ability to master different comedic voices led to her becoming the head writer for The Queen Latifah Show and ultimately The Nightly Show with Larry Wilmore, marking her place in history as the first black woman to serve as a head writer for a late-night television show.
"It's not about putting my jokes out there, it's about doing their jokes and making them the best comedian they already are and can continue to be."
“I think it really helped me to become better. The thing that I became known for in the industry and why I worked with so many different comedians is because I can listen to five or ten minutes of somebody's stand up and know how to write jokes in their voice. I was very much a student of comedy and a student of joke structure and formulas and tone and how people sound. I don't write the same jokes for everybody, I write different jokes for Kevin Hart than I would Chris Rock. So I think that's why I became valuable very quickly in the industry, because I was a valuable writer. And my sole purpose in writing for someone else is to make them their funniest. It's not about putting my jokes out there, it's about doing their jokes and making them the best comedian they already are and can continue to be."
While many of today's up-and-coming talent operate their careers on a microwave minute—often expressing frustration when success doesn't come as quickly as expected and dismissing the role of serving others until it's their time—Thede credits her years behind the scenes as being critical to her own evolution as a comedian and a writer.
Despite her continued success, she's never stopped craving knowledge—a trait often attributed to the wealthy and the wise. “Even today, working with Chris Rock as an executive producer is a dream come true. He's literally a living legend, which he's teaching me things that are different than what other comedians taught me and so I just try to absorb, and the more that I can absorb from all different types of comedians from sketch to stand up has been what helped me to find my comedy."
The Rundown with Robin Thede is being credited as a voice for the black community—a relatively unfiltered one that beautifully weaves pop culture and politics, and where Gucci Mane and presidential references can co-exist without being trumped by the white counterparts of a far too long racially diluted industry.
Photo Credit: Robin Thede
Thede believes that it's a sign of the times that a late-night show of such caliber can exist without rebuttal. “I was expecting the reviews of the show to either be non-existent or to say that they didn't understand what I was talking about, and they weren't. The reviews have been ridiculously glowing, and they get what we're doing, and so that's when I knew okay, the time is right. Black culture is the trendsetting culture and I think people want to be woke and they want to hear. They want to be cool also, and I think my show can do both."
Having a show that carries her name in the title isn't about fame or donning the title of “first," it's about paving the way for the now and the next, and making dents one thought-provoking joke at a time in a wall that keeps our voices—our people—from crossing comedic borders.
And as a Black woman, it's about being a pioneer so that one day it's no surprise to see similar faces in the writer's room, and that those who have a seat at the table didn't have to get there by softening their tone, straightening their hair, or wearing clothing that doesn't accentuate and complement their body type—but by working hard, not because they had to be ten times better than, but because they're simply the best.
“I don't take any of this for granted," she continues. “I think it's such a blessing. I certainly can't speak for every black woman nor would I attempt to, but I do think that being a Black woman in this space right now is so personal for me because women come up to me and say like thank you for speaking for us. Thank you for being a voice for us. Thank you for just being present. Thank you for being there. And that's why I'm here; this is it."
Aspiring talent, take note—this is what success looks like.
Watch the The Rundown with Robin Thede Thursdays 11/10c on BET.
Kiah McBride writes technical content by day and uses storytelling to pen real and raw personal development pieces on her blog Write On Kiah. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter at @writeonkiah.
ItGirl 100 Honors Black Women Who Create Culture & Put On For Their Cities
As they say, create the change you want to see in this world, besties. That’s why xoNecole linked up with Hyundai for the inaugural ItGirl 100 List, a celebration of 100 Genzennial women who aren’t afraid to pull up their own seats to the table. Across regions and industries, these women embody the essence of discovering self-value through purpose, honey! They're fierce, they’re ultra-creative, and we know they make their cities proud.
VIEW THE FULL ITGIRL 100 LIST HERE.
Don’t forget to also check out the ItGirl Directory, featuring 50 Black-woman-owned marketing and branding agencies, photographers and videographers, publicists, and more.
THE ITGIRL MEMO
I. An ItGirl puts on for her city and masters her self-worth through purpose.
II. An ItGirl celebrates all the things that make her unique.
III. An ItGirl empowers others to become the best versions of themselves.
IV. An ItGirl leads by example, inspiring others through her actions and integrity.
V. An ItGirl paves the way for authenticity and diversity in all aspects of life.
VI. An ItGirl uses the power of her voice to advocate for positive change in the world.
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Honestly, I don’t know if it will surprise y’all or not to know that a few years back, Vice published an article entitled, “Women Get Bored in Bed Faster Than Men.” When it comes to the clients I work with, what I will say is men tend to underestimate how creative women can be while women seem to overlook that men fake orgasms just about as much as they do. My grand takeaway from all of this? Folks need to be intentional when it comes to keeping the spice alive in their sex life; especially if they’re in a long-term relationship.
That’s why, when one couple came to me and asked what was something that they could do to light the fire (pun intended) in their own bedroom, the first thing that I asked was if they had ever tried wax play before. You should’ve seen the expression on their faces. LOL.
When it comes to things like that, I think that it’s still taboo for some, simply because they’ve only seen it on a movie screen or heard about it in true extreme sexual contexts — and so, they don’t think that it’s something that is “for them” when, the reality is, with the right tips in tow, wax play can be for pretty much anyone…and everyone.
So today, let’s add something new to some of y’all’s boudoir list of activities. Here are 10 things that will, hopefully, help you to see the flames of wax play (I’ve got puns all over the place today) in a whole new light.
1. Anticipation Does Wonders for Sexual Arousal
GiphyI once read an article by a mental health expert who said that anticipation is probably the greatest aphrodisiac of all. It builds excitement. It fuels curiosity. At the end of the day, it’s like a mental form of edging because you’re getting close to something that you look forward to — although you’re not quite there yet. Listen, he’s not off base because even science says that anticipation can give you a dopamine hit that can ultimately improve your sexual experiences.
Keeping this point in mind, how can watching hot wax drip from a candle and head toward your body not fuel some level of anticipation? Especially if it’s your first few times trying it? A woman by the name of Ana Monnar once said, “Anticipation is sometimes more exciting than actual events.” Just something to consider, when it comes to entertaining bringing wax play into your world, my dear.
2. Wax Play Is Peak-Level Foreplay
GiphyWe all know what foreplay is, right? Just to be sure that we’re all on the same page, a very basic definition is it’s something that typically happens right before sex in order to arouse the people who are about to have it. And since foreplay is pretty much the prelude to copulation, it’s important that “the appetizer” is damn near as good as the “main course.” Wax play can help to ensure that because, aside from what I just said about anticipation, it can also help you and your partner tap into your more sensual and seductive sides. It’s hot. It requires being mindful. And since so much give and take is involved, it requires both people to be very into the moment. Lawd. Wax play is sexy to even just think about!
3. Temperature Pleasure Is Lots of Fun
GiphyOkay, say that you’ve never played with wax (in this way) before. Have you ever incorporated ice cubes? I ain’t gonna let y’all get ALL up in my business, so…let me just say (for now) that some ice during oral sex ain’t neva hurt nobody…quite the contrary! There’s something about the unexpected cool that mixes around with the warmth of a mouth that is truly unmatched. Along these same lines, wax play brings in the heat and, what makes temperature pleasure/play so awesome is, that it uses the sensations of different temperatures to bring out different forms of stimulation.
Another thing that’s worth noting about temperature pleasure is if you’re someone who considers yourself to be on the sexually conservative side yet you do like this type of activity, whether you realize it or not, you’re low-key participating in a form of kink (yep!). This brings me to my next point.
4. Wax Play Is an Introduction to Kink
GiphyIt’s kind of interesting how some people clam up at the thought of a (sexual) kink when the reality is, at the end of the day, it’s about having a certain type of sexual experience (as opposed to a fetish that focuses on objects or body parts; like a foot fetish, for example). So, if it’s that simple, why does it intimidate a lot of folks? Well, kinks tend to delve into people’s fantasies or unconventional ways of thinking (like BDSM or voyeurism).
At the same time, the cool thing about kinks is you control how deep you want to go. Just know that if you do participate in wax play, there’s no point in turning up your nose to the whole kink thing; wax play technically qualifies.
5. Soy Does One Thing. Paraffin Does Another.
GiphyOkay, so let’s spend a couple of moments talking about the things that you need to get the most out of your wax play experience. First, please don’t be out here imitating movies. While they will have you believing that you should pull a taper candle from your dining room table and go ham with it, it’s best to go with massage candles; they are specifically designed for wax play and body massages (The Knot has a recommendation list here and Women’s Health has a list of their own here).
When it comes to candles, in general, I’m always a fan of soy because they burn cleaner and last longer. However, when it comes to wax play, two other reasons why soy is best is it’s natural and “burns lower;” this simply means that once the wax hits your body, it won’t be as hot as, say, paraffin wax will (because it has a higher burning point).
What all of this means is if you want a more comfortable experience, go with a soy (or even a shea butter or beeswax) candle. If you want to play with the big (wax play) kids, try paraffin.
Oh, and if you’re wondering if you can never use “regular” candles — I mean, it’s your body. All I’m saying is some candles are designed for wax play; birthday candles? They are not. Feel me?
6. Massage Candles Feel Incredible on Your Muscles and Joints
GiphySo, here’s the thing about massage candles: If you’ve ever had a professional massage before, your massage therapist may have used them. And if you’ve gotten a high-end mani/pedi, some paraffin wax may have come into play (no pun intended). That’s because the wax from both types of candles has health benefits that include relaxing muscles, improving joint mobility, and increasing blood flow throughout the body. And when you factor in the fact that the better you physically feel before sex, the better sex will be during it — isn’t that just one more plus for and perk of wax play? I definitely think so.
7. The Aromatherapy Is Incomparable
GiphySomething else that’s awesome about most massage candles is they have a wonderfully alluring scent to them, by design. Yes, that matters too because there is plenty of data out here to support the fact that aromatherapy does everything from reduce stress and relieve bodily discomfort to treat headaches and fight off infections (word on the street is that it may even help with menstrual cramps and menopause).
As far as your sex life goes, aromatherapy is supreme because certain essential oils double up as aphrodisiacs. Lavender, neroli, and rose are proven to improve your sexual function. Geranium reduces anxiety. And listen, if climaxing is your ultimate goal, check out “Ultimate Climax Hack? 10 Scents That Make It So Much Easier To Orgasm” and then look for massage oils that smell like, say, vanilla, saffron or jasmine. Bottom line, a good massage candle that smells amazing is going to be worth every cent that you spent to purchase it.
8. You Will Learn Communication (and Dirty Talk) on a Whole ‘Nother Level
GiphyOne of the reasons why I once penned, “Are You Ready To Apply Your Love Language To Your Sex Life?” for the platform is because, if there’s one thing that I think is so awesome about sex, is it finds a way to incorporate all five of your senses (sight, touch, taste, sound and hearing) as well as your top love languages (words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, physical touch and gifts — if you’re open to it).
And when it comes to hearing (and words of affirmation), this is another area where wax play can be a winner because, as you’re learning what works for your partner and they learn what works for you, words have to be exchanged… perhaps even dirty ones.
And why is dirty talk so damn effective? According to scientific research, it has the ability to activate your entire brain (the biggest sex organ that you have) and when this is going on while you’re being physically stimulated — chile, the sky truly is the limit!
9. Wax Play Is Completely Customizable
GiphyYou know back when I was talking about soy candles vs. paraffin ones? Something that I didn’t mention, by design at the time, is that, although I will forever be Team Massage Candles when it comes to this particular topic, there are some known as wax play candles too. What’s the difference? Wax play candles tend to remain pretty hard (after being lit up) while massage candles are designed to melt into a liquid that you can massage on your partner’s body.
Why am I bringing this all up now? Well, it’s to serve as a reminder that wax play can be “dialed up” or “turned down” based on what you want to do. If you just want to put a twist on a massage, you can do that. If you’d like to test your partner’s tolerance level by applying more heat for longer, do that.
Just make sure that you use the kind of wax that doesn’t fully melt on shaved areas of the body (pretty sure why is self-explanatory), that you moisturize your skin beforehand (it’s easier to remove the wax…or whatever is leftover) that way and that you pour around 15-20 inches away from your partner’s body; that gives it time to cool somewhat on the way down. Oh, and if you don’t want to jack up your sheets, you might want to lay down a protective drop cloth (like this one here).
10. It Sure As Hell Ain’t Boring
Season 1 Friends GIF - Find & Share on GIPHYGiphyLast point — and it brings all of this full circle. Now that you’ve read all of the ways that wax play can benefit your sex life, how in the world could you associate it with “boring” on any level? Anything that can get you hype, cultivate eagerness, and enhance what you’ve already got going on…that is worth putting on your sex bucket list and trying at least one time, wouldn’t you say? And why can’t that time be…TONIGHT? Shoot your man a pick of a massage candle with a heart and watch him beat you home.
Then report back (with edits…LOL).
Something tells me that you’ll become a wax play fan — SOON.
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